Today’s meditation was ten minutes long and was a second day of pranayama exercises for pain management. Is it bad that I don’t wanna go back to work and feel like I need a few more days off? Not that I’m taking a few more days off, I’ve been easing back into work a little each day for the past few days, so that I won’t be overwhelmed tomorrow. But still…. it feels like this week went by way too fast.
Today’s draw is the Dreamer Two (Two of Swords) card, which is traditionally a representation of making hard choices and weighing your options in an effort to come to a decision, as well as can be an indication of avoidance.
This card is, in fact, the same card that I pulled yesterday, although the imagery is vastly different, and the message I see in this card is different as well. What I see in the imagery of this card is two halves making a whole. I see clarity through diversity.
A lot of times we divide ourselves into pieces. Things like “head/heart” or “good/bad” and then we weigh one side against the other and raise one up while the other is pushed away. What I see here in the imagery of this card today is the equality of accepting both halves and allowing them to give you a wider perspective and the “wings” to move forward with knowledge and certainty.
The message in this card today is about allowing both “sides” of you to have a part in your life. It is not a “bad side” and a “good side”. They are you… and you are not whole without them both. This is whether we are looking at the dynamic of good and bad, or head and heart, or any number of divides people use to slice themselves into pieces.
Be whole… seek balance. These things are what make a person complete.
DECK USED: TAROT OF THE SIDHE
#TarotForGrowthAugust Challenge Prompt
Topic: I’m plagued by anxiety.
Question: How can I better listen to anxiety’s messages in the future?
Reading Summary: When anxiety pops up and you trip over it (Wheel of Fortune Rx), don’t immediately jump on yourself (Eight of Wands) and make judgements, but take the time to really pay attention to what is going on (King of Swords).
Take Away: It’s natural to immediately go on the defensive when anxiety spikes. These reactions are often (not always) mixed signals of fight and flight that tangle up in themselves and make a mess out of things… so when you then immediately go on the defensive you are discounting anything that the anxiety might have been trying to say before getting all tangled up and “tongue tied”. Instead, you need to own this moment. Own it and examine it, listen to what the anxiety is saying and work at communicating with this reaction to suss out where it came from and what to do about it.
DECK USED: ENCORE TAROT
#DiscordTarotholicsAug2020 Challenge Prompt
Question: What do I need to focus on for self care this new moon?
Reading Summary: Your creative juices are flowing (Page of Cups) and you have the energy and enthusiasm to follow where they lead (Page of Wands), but you’ll have make sure to stay in control and be quick on your feet to keep up (The Chariot).
Take Away: The rest through the waning time of the moon’s cycle seems to have really done me a lot of good. I was feeling a bit overwhelmed by the time my days off came around this month… really overwhelmed.
My recovery has helped me in feeling more myself, and that includes the kindling warmth of creativity and inspiration that begin to get snuffed out during my phases of overwhelm and burnout. The cards here indicate I should embrace that kindling flame and direct it where I want it to go. Now is the time to add a little control and direction to the situation so that that kindled spark of energy doesn’t get wasted.
DECK USED: HERO ANALYSIS FOR THE FUTURE #79 MHA TAROT
Reading Summary: When it feels like the walls are starting to crumble (The Tower), lean on your friends (Three of Cups) and step back from impulsivity (Knight of Swords) into a more measured approach forward (Page of Swords)
Take Away: The reminder here is that I have loved ones that care for me and support me. Sometimes they hop in and help on their own, but they’re just as happy to help when I actually reach out and ask. The help mentioned here is emotional support, and the cards indicate that if I reach for them for emotional support instead of acting impulsively on my own, I will benefit from their influence in guiding me to a more measured approach to the issues and my recovery from them.
TL:DR; You’re not alone. Don’t act like it. Slow down when needed and accept emotional support when you need it.
DECK USED: PRIDE TAROT
#ConnectWithYourDeckChallenge by E Roebuck-Jones
Question: What stops me from sharing my gifts?
Reading Summary: Concern that instead of finding a beneficial unifying experience working with another (Two of Cups) and a different perspective provided through their influence (The Hanged Man), that instead I’ll end up having to defend myself against somebody stealing my shit (Seven of Wands) and fucking up my business (The Tower).
Take Away: Okay so… Fear. What stops me from sharing my gifts more openly is the fear that I will have my creative endeavors stolen from me or what is the positive results of my endeavors threatened. This result would be not just devastating to my endeavors and possibly my future stability, but also to my emotions as when my trust is crushed I have a habit internalizing those emotions and turn them upon myself. This risk is represented in the fact that the Two of Cups was used for representing collaboration with another.