Ask For Help

Today’s meditation was just under twenty minutes long, and was not guided. It was a part of my morning yoga that I do daily to keep my “repaired parts” operating smoothly as a part of my physiotherapy.

It was very relaxing, but I think I’m going to have to go back to doing the guided meditation once I’m back home. I just feel like I’m not getting as much out of the self directed ones, although, they are a nice change now and then.

Tarot of the Little Prince Today’s draw is the Five of Wands, which is traditionally read as a conflict or clash of passions and ambitions.

Although I definitely see this portrayed in this card, my intuitive hit was much stronger off the image itself than from the traditional meaning. Ive noticed that this has happened a lot with both the Tarot of the Little Prince and the Ostara Tarot while on this trip.

What I see in today’s card is about getting through tough times with the help of others, rather than on your own. Sometimes burdens and conflict are handled better together than on your own. This is a lesson that I struggle with quite a bit as I always feel like I need to do everything myself.

Today’s card is telling me to remember to ask for help when I get home and begin processing orders for the time I have been away.


Bonus Reading – #TarotForGrowthNovember

Question: What positive thought pattern should I embrace moving forward?

Ostara TarotReading Summary: remember you do not live in a place of scarcity anymore (Ten of Coins), achieving your goals means acknowledging you can’t do everything at once (Two of Wands atop the King of Wands) so stop ignoring (Four of Cups) the natural changes (Death) that progress has wrought (King of Wands and Ten of Pentacles).

Take Away:  The cards are telling me that I’m living in the past and ignoring that I have reached a point in my business where I need to accept help. In the future, it would be a positive change to ask for help when I need it, which the cards indicate will assist in easing my scarcity issues.


The Magic of Synergy

Today’s meditation was about 20 minutes long, and the mist peaceful I’ve had so far since coming to visit mom’s house. That is because everyone went out to shop for a new recliner and I was left at home alone.

The meditation itself was not guided, but instead a full body scan with a bit of stretching mixed in.

The Lovers - Ostara Tarot Today’s draw is the Lovers card, and the reading off of today’s card is intuitive rather than through traditional meanings.

What I see in today’s card is synergy. In my experience, when you dance ballroom style (as in the photo) while blindfolded, there is a connection necessary that goes beyond familiarity and the physical. It becomes a give and take of energy, an ebb and flow of two becoming one. There is no lead and follow, no you and them. It is a synergy, a melding, a swirling together into one entity guided by music.

When it’s right, and you both feel it, it is perfect. In my relationship with you, there are times when I have felt this as well. It is magic… a very special type of magic.

Today’s card is simply a reminder of those times, and how amazing and precious they are.


Bonus Reading – #TarotForGrowthNovember

Question: What negative thought pattern should I leave behind?

Tarot of the Little Prince

Reading Summary: Keeping everything to myself (Nine of Pentacles) because if the worry that sharing my emotional enthusiasm (Ace of Cups) will lead to unpleasant consequences (knight of Swords), and so choose to show a facade that I’m fully in control (King of Pentacles) using distractions to keep other’s attention elsewhere (Six of Cups).

Take Away:  This is all about my perception of vulnerability associated with emotion. It is also about the Less-Than whisper. Sharing my emotions with others is a struggle for me, as I see my emotions as a vulnerability that, when shared, opens me up to manipulation and pain.

This is not to say that I am not genuine or true to myself, but it means that I muffle and tone down the emotional side of myself so that most only ever see the ripples on the surface and not the strong currents beneath, or I use distractions to direct people’s attention elsewhere so that they miss seeing much of anything at all.

(Side Note: This is a part of why I found you so intimidating when I first met you. You would not be distracted. Instead you looked beyond the ripples and into the depths, and refused to look away.)


The Right Path

This week’s question from the Pagan Perspective YouTube channel is about finding your path.

Topic for the Week of 11/25: What let’s you know you have chosen the right path?

Is it strange that I’m having trouble formulating a reply to this question when I am so certain of my (somewhat unconventional even in the pagan community) path?

The thing is… it’s my heart and my gut that tell me I’m on the right path. I feel it deep inside where the soul lives.

I think that to get to that point, though, you have to get to a point of acceptance of the knowledge that everyone’s path is going to be different. Spirituality isn’t a “cookie cutter” experience, but rather highly individualistic. There is no right or wrong other than what is right for you (and of course, you know, legalities).

Once you can accept that each and every person is a unique snowflake and their spirituality is going to echo that individuality, then as you start exploring different practices, beliefs, faiths, and dogmas… you will find that some just feel right… and others don’t.

Take what resonates with you instead of trying to fit into a mold someone else had decided should be yours, and you will find it easier and easier to identify those things that work for you.

Turn Around… It’s About Perspective

Today’s meditation has not happened yet, because I had to get up early to help with things in the kitchen. I will be doing the meditation before sleep today, and will probably fall asleep during, as I’m very tired.

Today’s draw is the Eight of Swords, and thus reading is an intuitive hit that’s is 100% off of the card imagery.

The message in today’s card is that sometimes when things are looking their worst, you just need to open your eyes and look behind you. It’s not often that solutions to life’s problems just fall into your lap, sometimes a little creative thinking outside the box is in order for things to fall into place.


Bonus Reading – #TarotForGrowthNovember

Question: What what truth would like to reveal itself to me?

Ostara Tarot Reading Summary: When you pounce on new ambitions and passions, it can cause struggle and conflict (Five of Wands atop Ace of Wands), true success takes a combination of hard work, time, and patience (Temperance atop Seven of Coins). With those qualities present you can fly (The Star).

Take Away:  I have this habit of “pounce and plunder” whenever amazing new project ideas spring up, and that can cause a lot of chaos as I try to fit them in with current responsibilities. The cards are reminding me that “slow and steady wins the race”. If I want to achieve my goals, I need to practice some patience.


Internal Struggles

Today’s meditation was done on the hardwood floor with my feet up on the bed. I needed the extra support because my back was killing me and the hard surface helped with stabilization and stretching it out. The meditation was not guided and lasted about fifteen minutes of quiet breathing.

Two of Pentacles - Ostara TarotToday’s draw is the Two of Pentacles. This is a card that I usually see quite a bit of chaos concerning. Not in the “Tower” sense of chaos, but just in that it takes a good deal of work to create balance and sometimes that work can feel chaotic.

In this card? It feels even more so. It is the smoke from the bottles, but mor than that, it is the lack of constraint created by the infinity loop that usually accompanies the balancing of the two aspects. There is also the element that the man is floating, which increases that sense of lack of control.

And yet? The birds on the ground are calm and perceive no threat.

Today’s card is a reminder that although creating balance can sometimes feel like a process that is chaotic and anchor less, this is just a trick of the mind. An internal struggle. And if you take a moment to step outside yourself in these moments, you will find that everything is fine, and that the storm is only on the inside.


Bonus Reading – #TarotForGrowthNovember

Question: How can I be more trusting of my inner voice?

Tarot of the Little PrinceReading Summary: Take some time to look around instead of holding so tightly to the reigns (The Chariot), sometimes you have to look back at the things you’ve done in life and forgive yourself for your faults (Judgement) snd instead focus on all the good you’ve done instead (Six of Cups).

Take Away:  The cards are indicating that I am too hard on myself, and too harsh and stringent with myself. They are saying that if I want an even better connection to that inner voice, I need to let up and treat my inner self better.


Shadow Work (The Less-Than Whisper)

I hit a bit of a wall on research concerning the shadow work and steps for moving forward.

After some thought I decided to reach out to someone with a bit more experience, who suggested that the reason I’m having trouble assimilating this shadow is that it is not entirely seated In the shadow self at all.

They suggested that perhaps It may be tied to something that is a part of my core and needs further development. Meaning that the whisper has a source that isn’t wholly external to my ‘light side’, and there is something where it is rooted that needs growth or development within me. And once the ‘soul’ has grown, developed, and transformed, then the shadow/whisper can be reassessed if needed.

This has a ring of truth to it. There are parts of myself that, because of the way I walled myself off emotionally and grew up so fast, never developed properly or fully.

They suggested doing a chakra reading to look for blocks, which I have, and I will post next week when I am at a computer and have had a bit of time to analyze the results and dig deeper into it.