Large and In Charge

Today’s meditation has not yet happened, as I was running a bit late this morning and I really wanted to get my drive done and over with as early as possible.   Somehow, when I meditate, even though I’m only meditating for about ten minutes?  It takes something like thirty minutes.  I’m not sure where that extra time goes, but I just couldn’t spare it this morning.    I will meditate before bed tonight, though, for sure.

The Emperor - Hush TarotToday’s draw is the Emperor card, which is traditionally a representation of authority, structure, “the establishment”, and control.

The thing is, what I saw in today’s card is… control.  And what I read from today’s card is that in order to ensure my own safety I need to be in control.   This comes through to me in the parade of little people-creatures below the hands and the bird, as well as the way that the bird spreads above them, large and in charge.

What this meant for me today was that in my trip up north and over the border, I took extra measures to project authority, and an unapproachable demeanor.  This included not just posture and the projection of energy (which is really my strong suit, to be honest), but also that I wore one of my “scary” face masks (similar to this) in order to intimidate those around me into giving me space and staying out of my way.

DECK USED:  HUSH TAROT

#TarotForGrowthMarch Challenge Prompt
Question
: What can I do to prepare for the impending seasonal shift?

Les Métamorphoses du Jour Tarot

Reading Summary:  Get my ducks in a row (King of Swords) and make sure things are stable as far as resources go (Four of Coins) so that if I need to step away for a while, I can (Eight of Cups).

Take Away:  Considering the situation going on in the world in the moment, it appears that the spring is going to be a bit of a struggle resources-wise.  The cards are telling me to plan and get organized, make sure everything is as prepared and stable as I can make it…. just in case.

DECK USED:  LES METAMORPHOSES DU JOUR TAROT

#DiscordTarotholicsMar2020 Challenge Prompt
Question
: Where am I emotionally at this time?

Fenestra Tarot

Reading Summary:  Although I’m projecting a sense of being large and in charge (The Chariot), and trying to grasp at that energy and claim it as my own (Page of Swords), I’m actually on the cusp of a shift back to my regular low-key self (Two of Swords Rx).

Take Away:  I’ve been topping in our relationship for a bit now and it’s been really comfortable for the first time in a long time. I hate how I always seem to “fizzle out” after the energy peaks between us in roleplay, though.  Now that we’ve hit that peak,  I can feel the transition shifting  back the other way, and the whispering need to hand over the reigns is returning.

It always makes me feel like a bit of a failure when we get to that pinnacle point and then on the other side of it… I can’t seem to maintain that control and dominance.  It feels like I’m failing because it makes me feel like I’m not providing the aftercare that is needed.  I’ve been told this isn’t the case again and again, and yet… that feeling remains.  It makes the transition a bit more difficult than it needs to be, I think, so I really need to find a way to get over it.

DECK USED:  FENESTRA TAROT

#ConnectWithYourDeckChallenge by E Roebuck-Jones
Question
: If I listen to my intuition more, what could I change?

Goblin Tarot (RWS Edition)

Reading Summary:  Less need for quick defensiveness (Eight of Wands) because of a more developed sense of inner strength (Strength) provides the ability to step forward as an authority and guide to others (Hierophant).

Take Away:  So when reading your intuition, it’s important to jump first and ask questions later.  Sometimes my logical brain gets in the way.  It doesn’t happen often because I have a very strong trust in my intuition, but it does happen now and then.  When it does, it’s usually because my brain has jumped so fast that I end up confused between which message is from where.

If I am more speedy about snagging that intuitive message before the brain can interject to mess things up, my strength in intuitive matters will continue to grow, which in turn will assist me in helping others in finding their own inner voice and their own path.

DECK USED:  GOBLIN TAROT (RWS EDITION)

One thought on “Large and In Charge

  1. We have already discussed the “scary mask” and your large and in charge energy and I repeat…H.O.T.. You are so hot

    As for handing over the reigns, it is time, my love. I know you want to stick to your guns and make sure I’m okay and that you feel like you’re fallen short, but you haven’t. Not at all. You have made me fee loved and cherished and yours…and now it’s time to let me take back the reigns and settle into that space that is ultimately more natural and more comfortable for you. *Grins soft* It’s okay my love. I promise.

    It doesn’t mean you can’t take the reigns again when you’re feeling that space approaching, when you’re ready, you can step into that space again, but for now…*winks* Daddy’s home.

    Liked by 1 person

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