Growth Is a Journey

Today’s meditation was just over ten minutes long and was another of the guided meditations in the Calm app combined with an interval timer for my piriformis stretches.

The focus of today’s meditation was about how when you focus too hard on a goal or endeavor,  you often end up missing so  much else going on around you… and all of the fun as well.

Fine Line Tarot and Thera-Pets Emotinal Spport Animal CardsToday’s draw is The Hermit card, which is traditionally a representation of taking time to one’s self for the purposes of contemplation and self-development. The Hermit is the solitary time needed to cast light upon new paths in one’s life and growth.

The Thera-Pets card combined with the meaning behind the Hermit card leaves he in a place of remembering what was said in my Self Care Saturday spread this week.  That is to say, that this week needs to be about enjoying… having fun… relaxing.  Leaving the mundane and weight of responsibility behind and allowing myself time to breathe.

Sometimes… okay, almost always, this is extremely difficult for me. But, when I first started allotting time off for myself on a semi-regular basis last  year… it was nearly impossible.  It’s no longer impossible, it just takes a bit of effort. A bit of struggle.

Slowly but surely, I’m becoming more accustomed to taking this time off and enjoying it, and with each time I do it and feel the benefits that I reap from it, I learn a little more about how to do it more easily and with less feelings of pressure and guilt entangled into the experience.


The Sacred Grounds Tarot Club Prompt
What role does play hold in my life?

Sidewalk Chalk Tarot de Marseille

Reading Summary: Sometimes you get a little carried (Cavalier de Bâton) away in overburden yourself (Dix de Bâton) with those things that you’re really enthusiastic about and want to explore creatively (Cavalier de Coupe).

Take Away: My creativity is my where play resides in my life.  I’ve never been much of the “carefree” type.  I don’t fool around or spend a lot of time doing the whole “fun and games” thing.  I find joy and pleasure, passion and spark, in my creative process and all the different ways in which I express myself creatively.

The problem with this is that my work is also creative in nature, and sometimes when I’m diving into one or the other, they blend together, compound on each other, and I end up overwhelmed.  Then the fun dies and I’m left with feelings of overburden and responsibility… and no pleasure or play at all.


#DiscordTarotolicsApr2021 Challenge Prompt
: Do Spread #1

Fine Line Tarot and Carrot CardsWhat does this loved one need less of from me?
Eight of Cups and The Rolling Rabbit

Stop ignoring the need for fun and pleasure, or pushing it away and considering it not a priority or not important.  It is important and shouldn’t be rejected, ignored, or devalued. A part of his purpose, he feels, is to give me a chance to cut loose and find pleasure in life. Don’t reject the value of these things or view them as inconsequential.

What does this loved one need more of from me?
Eight of Pentacles and The Safe Burrow

Lean in and let him do what he does best, which is making you feel safe and secure, helping you to relax, and sheltering you when you are feeling out of sorts or overwhelmed. Expressing when you are feeling this way is important, and it’s important to him to provide that safe haven for you when you need it.

What in this relationship is being entirely neglected?
The Chariot and Kicking

My dominant nature. Usually this is something that only really displays itself outside of my relationship with him.  There is something about Gideon that specifically pulls on my submissive side.  Outside of him, dominant traits usually reign if only at times in how I control my life and lead in the ways I’m comfortable. But, there are times that it rises up within the context of our relationship.   This is not one of those times.  Yes, that side of myself is being “entirely neglected” right now, but I’m very aware that when those needs rise, I can speak up and they will be welcomed eagerly with open arms.


Daily Self Kindness

I spent the majority of my day relaxing and spending time with Gideon in play.  It’s been a very “chill” day.

One thought on “Growth Is a Journey

  1. I am so proud of you for these vacations. I’m proud of you for learning to relax and not panicking so much when you’re not working. You are doing fantastic babe, you really are.

    *Grins at the reading that is about him* I love you, babyboy. I’m here for whatever you need, whenever you need it. Sometimes I might ask questions, but know that I’m all for giving you exactly what it is that you’re craving.

    And don’t worry about the lack of your dominant nature. That doesn’t surface very often and with an MDE just in your rearview, I don’t expect to see it for a long time to come either. And that’s okay.

    Liked by 1 person

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