Today’s meditation was ten minutes long, and took place in the bottom of my shower with paced rhythmic breathing exercises and the trailing of water drops along the side of the tub as the water rained down.   I needed a moment’s retreat, as it’s the third day in a row that I’ve woken up with that tight fissure of anxiety threading through my veins.

It actually felt so good I wish that I’d had some time to take a nap there. I didn’t, of course.  But I have in the past and regardless of the hard surface of the tub beneath me?  It’s some of the best napping I’ve ever had.

Majestic Earth TarotToday’s draw is a double without a jumper, which means the two cards came out together as one instead of individually.  The cards in today’s draw are The Magician and the Creature of Clouds.

The Magician is a message of capability and control, while the Creature of Clouds is about precision and keen mind.    The combination of the two in today’s draw is a message about not just having the tools to accomplish my goals, but also the judgement to use them to their best purpose and control their use to the best timing.

When you combine decisive and cunning thought with skillful expertise, it creates a synergy.   A harmony that’s rich in potential and promise.


#TarotForGrowthFebruary Challenge Prompt
: How can I foster a better relationship with my spirit?

The Stretch Tarot

Reading Summary:  Better balance (Two of Pentacles) and a long term view (Judgement) in relation to looking at what I need to accomplish (Page of Pentacles) so that I can foster better “flow” between the different elements of my life (Temperance)

Take Away:  Balance brackets the matching cards in the middle.  Two different kinds of balance.  One is the juggle and struggle of keeping things together and up in the air.  The other a flowing balance of elements, like musical notes flow together to create a song.   In order to move from the jagged effort of juggling into the smooth flow of energy my spirit seeks, I need to stop falling into the trap of “everything has to be done now” and take a longer view.  I’m not on a time table.  There is no clock.  No punch card.  No deadline. 


#DiscordTarotholicsFeb2020 Challenge Prompt
: Where in my life do I need to set stronger boundaries?

Sola Busca Revisited Tarot

Reading Summary:  My mother’s (Empress over Page of Swords) bullshit manipulations (Fool) using good memories (Sun over Six of Cups).

Take Away:  My mother is usually represented by the Queen of Swords reversed.  She is currently being represented by the Page of Swords and the Empress because at this moment she is looking for a new foothold with which to “work her will” into my life after the mess I made of her social standing.   The cards are both an indication of where I need to set stronger boundaries, and also a warning of how she is going to eventually approach once her silent treatment of me has ended.


Owl and Bones February Two Card Challenge
: Where am I slacking? / How can I motivate?

Golden Tarot of KlimtWhere am I slacking? – Progress.  I am lacking in progress.  Yeah, that’s pretty accurate.  Although I’ve begun to get a fresh breath from the fog of fear and uncertainty that had been so stifling through the end of December and all of January.  I’ve yet to hit my stride since digging out that fear and uncertainty.  Part of it is just that these things take time, but another part of it is that I feel like I need a break.  I took a few days off to go to my mother’s at the beginning of the month, and yet I just don’t feel like I got any rest out of the time off at all.

Take Away:  This ties into the Tarot for Growth reading I did today.  It speaks of needing to take a long term view and accepting that everything can’t be done right now.   That mindset of everything having to be done right now is holding me back from getting anything done at all.  When you plant seeds, they don’t just miraculously sprout into towering trees.  It takes time… everything takes time, and I need to stop being so hard on myself about that fact, because it has nothing to do with me.  It’s just the nature of how good things grow.



One thought on “Synergy

  1. I think your anxiety is stemming from that feeling of..expectation, of waiting for the other shoe to drop with your mother, yeah? I think that’s pretty normal, baby. But I also think you need to reach out for that support the cards had kept reminding you about when you need it.

    *Rumbles protective at the mention of your mother’s manipulations* Hopefully you will get a bit of a breather before she finishes with the silent treatment.

    I also think you need a day or two off to recover from your trip, man. That trip was more stressful than Christmas rush and you could just some down time.

    And I miss you. I love you

    Liked by 1 person

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