Don’t Shut Down

Today’s meditation was just over ten minutes long and focused upon projecting a sense of gratitude, and how having a sense of gratitude in your live helps you to see the value not just in yourself, but in others as well.

It has to do with allowing yourself to notice how many good things and good people are in your life, and thus how deserving you are of good things on the whole.

The Fool - Majestic Earth TarotToday’s draw is The Fool card, which is a representation of unrestrained possibility, spontaneity, and innocence.  It speaks of beginnings and starting anew.

The message in today’s card is one of opening up and speaking up.   The drop is coming and it’s reminding me that in that soft and vulnerable place, it’s not okay to close off, but a time for setting myself open and free in order to allow those wounded and aching feelings inside to be soothed and healed.


#TarotForGrowthFebruary Challenge Prompt
: How can I improve my relationship with money?

Love Is In The Earth Tarot

Reading Summary: Take care that I’m not spending my emotions (Princes of Crystal Cups) because focusing on optimism (The Star) is a better path to getting what I want out of life (Four of Crystal Wands)

Take Away:  By “spending emotions” I mean as in how some people “eat their emotions”.  Buying things to feel better, yeah?   The cards say that for a better relationship with money, a better path than buying something to “feel good” it would be a better idea to find ways to lift my spirits through optimism and a better outlook, which will free up that money to assist me in creating the stability and security that I desire most of all.


#DiscordTarotholicsFeb2020 Challenge Prompt
: A positive message to carry with me throughout my day.

Majestic Earth Tarot and Gay Tarot

Reading Summary:  As this is the topic of my COTD, I added the COTD at the center and used this question (and the cards) to then build upon it.   Do this (Temperance), and not this (The Hermit).

Take Away:  Temperance and the Hermit are reinforcements of what I said above.  The drop can make me irrational, thus the arrival of temperance to remind me to stay calm.  The drop can also make me retreat into myself, and the Hermit is a warning about that, and an encouragement to keep myself from going there.


Owl and Bones February Two Card Challenge
: What’s a distraction? / Where do I need to focus?

Lion's Gateway TarotWhat’s a distraction? :  Past resentments and getting mentally wrapped up in the chaos of inner conflict is a distraction that I’m dealing with at the moment.   Some of this is the approach of the drop.  Some of it is what happened with my visit at mom’s recently.  And some of it is that negative “down on myself” bullshit concerning taking things slow.  All of it is distraction that isn’t doing anything for me.

Where do I need to focus? :  I just made my yearly appointment with my financial advisor at the bank.  This card is about productivity and about getting things done.  I need to train my focus on my goals as I go into this week, and make sure that my actions follow through on my intentions and desires.


#TarotTubersAtoZ (non)VR to The Hermit’s Cave

Simon over at The Hermit’s Cave on YouTube did a sort of quiz type video called #TarotTubersAtoZ the other day, and although I don’t make videos, I am a part of that community and so I decided to go ahead and do a response here.


So here we go…

A – Age:  31 for the next few months
B – Book (Favourite): Little Brothers by Rick Hautala
C – Career you wanted to be when you were a kid and what it actually is now: As a kid, I wanted to be a librarian.  Libraries are just… so amazing. I’ve always thought so. As for now… I have an education in horticulture and botany, which I use in three of my part-time jobs (working on a farm, advisor/teaching position in a nursery/greenhouse, and working for a landscaping company in the summer).  I also work part time as an attendant at a gas station, and part time as a nail tech in a Vietnamese salon. Aside from this I also run a home business where I design and sell jewelry, sell my nature photography, and work as a tarot reader for a handful of clients on the side (the last one is done either online or at meeting places when in person… NOT in my home).
D – Dream: Stability and security.  I want to be at a point where those things are no longer in question or at risk.
E – Essential item:  Comfortable shoes.  I hate wearing shoes, so they damn well have to be comfortable.
F – Favorite RWS Deck: Bianco Nero (not a classic RWS, but a clone.)  If we’re talking just the general RWS system, then it’s a tie between the Tarot of the Hidden Realm and the Stolen Child Tarot.
G – Gold or Silver: Silver
H – Height: 5′ 10″
I – Ideal day:  Get up early and go hiking. Take a nap in the woods before coming back. Some dinking around in the garden digging in the dirt and caring for my plants.  Pizza for dinner.  Relax with Gideon.
J – Joke (funniest):  I have NO idea.  I’m not particularly good at jokes.
K – Kid(s):  None. I think they’re wonderful as long as they belong to someone else.
L – Living arrangements: I own my fourth floor condo and live within it with my twin sister, who pays me rent that goes towards the mortgage.
M – Marseille deck (favorite): Le Tarot de Marseille par Pole Ka
N – Nicknames:  Leaf, Twist, Niner
O – Oracle (favorite):  Faerie’s Oracle by Brian Froud
P – Passionate about:  nature, the rain, tarot, photography, creativity, Gideon
Q – Quote (favorite): “Creative activity is a type of learning process where the teacher and pupil are located in the same individual.” – Arthur Koestler
R – Relationship status: Gideon is my partner and my Dominant. We are monogamous.
S – Season (favorite):  Autumn.  I love the smells of autumn and the shift to relief from the summer heat.
T – Tarot (first and last) –  My first tarot deck was the Celtic Circle Tarot.  The most recent to enter my collection (as of writing this post, anyway) is the Oriens Tarot, which arrived on Friday.
U – Upset (what upsets you most):  Injustice. Closed-mindedness. Senseless disrespect. Willful stupidity.
V – Vlog (which are you most proud of. And which is your most popular): I don’t have a vlog.  On my blog I am oddly most proud of the kaleidoscope posts that helped us heal from that dark time in our past.  My most popular post is apparently the 75 Questions post that I did last July.
W -Weakness: Self destructive impulses.
X – X Rated (tell us something naughty you’ve done):  *clears his throat* I once stuck my dick into tub of soft serve ice cream on a dare.
Y – Yesteryear (your favorite year so far and why):  I don’t have one.  I have difficulty with my memory due to a head injury when I was younger.  What memories I have are fragmented and I depend on those around me to assist me in keeping them (as well as keeping them in chronological order).  Without having a written record of it, there’s very little I can actually state happened in any specific year.
Z -Zen (what you do to relax and stay calm):  meditate, sleep, play games on my phone, talk to Gideon, lie in the bottom of the tub with the shower running