Old Habits Die Hard

Today’s meditation was ten minutes and fifty six seconds, and focused on dealing with failure.  Everyone deals with failure from time to time, and the key to moving past it is to look at failures as a lesson to be learned, rather than internalizing failure into a reflection of you and your worth.

My mindset on doing something… anything, really, is that I will push myself as hard as I can.  Try my best to do the very best that I can.   That way, IF I end up failing, I can’t look back and say “Well, that was a waste of time.  I could have done better.”     Instead, when I fail, I can look back and see where I can improve and either make changes to my approach the next time or accept that perhaps what I was striving for just wasn’t meant for me.    Because I gave it my all, there is no doubt that I “could have done better” somehow.  I know that I did my best.

I think if more people looked at things in this way, there would be far less people out there “half assing” shit.  And far less people putting themselves down when they eventually fail at something.

This isn’t to say that I don’t get bummed sometimes when I stumble across failure.  I do.  But it’s extremely rare that I internalize it as a reflection on me on a personal level.

In the guided meditation, failure was presented as an opportunity for growth, but also as something you separate yourself from (much like rejection was approached in a recent Supportive Tarot topic).   In this approach, you work to view failure not as a reflection on YOU personally (ie: your personality or worth), but rather a failure of the method.

Today’s draw is the Knight of Cups, which is a representation of a projective beta energy, personality, or person in the area of emotions, relationships, intuition, and creativity.

A lot of times in readings I see this card as the charmer in the bar, full of flattery and lacking substance.  Or rather, his aim in the moment lacks substance, right?  He’s not after the long term, he just wants to feel good and in the process, his emotional manipulations and machinations will make -you- feel good too… for the time being, anyway.

This card, of course, represents far more than that, and I don’t think that is the message in the card today.

Today, the Knight of Cups is telling me to get in touch with my emotions.  Emerging from the subdrop, sometimes I find myself backsliding into  my old stand-by habits of closing myself off emotionally.    Today’s card is a reminder to actively keep an eye on this and stay open… to you, to others, and to the world at large.



One thought on “Old Habits Die Hard

  1. I can’t imagine you doing -anything- half assed. It’s just not in your nature to not give whatever you are doing your all. And in most things, you thrive. I know you don’t see it that way, but I will disagree. You are so talented in so many areas, and those things that you don’t know how to do, you strive to learn.

    You’re amazing, baby. I love you so much


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