Hello Again, My Queen

Today’s meditation was ten minutes long, and focused on “holding space” for others as a way to support them during times of struggle.  It was about how sometimes, people don’t need you to fix things in their life, they just need you to be there with them.  To share space with them in a quiet way that shows support either by listening, or just by the reassurance of your presence, without “butting in” on their problems.

Today’s draw is the Queen of Swords, which is a representation of a “feminine” alpha energy in the area of thoughts, reason, instinct, and communication.  The card embodies the tenants of truth seeking, independence, unbiased consideration, and clear communication.

I haven’t seen the Queen of Swords in a couple weeks, and was starting to think perhaps I had managed to somehow unwittingly absorb the message she has been trying so hard to teach me for the past year and a half, but… here she is once more, regal and beautiful and daring me to seek and speak the truth in all things.

During the depression, and during the time a few years ago when we “switched places” for a while, I stumble a bit in being honest with myself.  Not just with the expectations that I put on myself, but even with looking at -how- I’m doing.

I bundle myself up into this little ball of awareness, that is so focused on the day to day that I miss the bigger picture.

This activity on the blog here, my daily meditation (that I am still doing religiously every day), and my recent return to a more active path in my spirituality has, in a lot of ways, opened my eyes and my mind to how much of myself has been closed off, one little bit at a time.

Thank you for taking this journey with me, man.  I love you.

One thought on “Hello Again, My Queen

  1. I hate that I put you through that time of my depression when I lost myself and lost sight of who and what I represent for you. I hate that you felt the need to “switch places” I hate that you suffered, enough that you became angry and resentful. I hate the choking guilt of it that still remains even now. I hate that I let you lose faith in me, that the trust you had in me was damaged and might never actually be whole again. I hate it and yet the only thing I can do to heal it, to win back your trust is to make sure it never, ever happens again. It doesn’t feel like it’s enough.

    I do love being able to share this with you though. Seeing your thoughts, taking the journey with you and reading your daily messages each day and learning all the things that you discover about yourself.

    I love you man. Always

    Like

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