Month: February 2021

Morning Bonus Read – Difficulties and Safety

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The prompt for this reading came from one of my Discord servers and is as follows:
“If you’re in the states/midwest you’re probably experiencing the lovely winter storm we’re having. If you aren’t, please join us in solidarity with our divination prompt for this week.”

Aves Uncaged Bicycle Playing CardsWhat external circumstances are making my life difficult this week?

Queen of Clubs –  My dedication and drive for the business that I run is being challenged. I have a good deal of experience to work with in this area, and yet I cannot seem to rise above the uncertainty that I’m feeling due to current external circumstances.

How should I stay safe?

Nine of Hearts – Do what feels right in my heart.  I did this earlier in the week with changing the day that I went up to the post office.  I’ve done it, as well, with taking some time off to care for myself as I recover from my depression. This gives me time to practice gratitude for the things in life that bring me contentment and joy rather than staying focused upon those areas that are creating an unhealthy amount of stress.

How should I keep my people safe?

Six of Spades – Give them the room that they need to set themselves to rights, just as I am taking the time I need to set myself to rights.  The ‘time off’ for the business applies to more than just me, and by allowing them to step away from it at the same time I do, it gives them time to decompress and let go of the stress that is riding them as well.

What should I focus on during this time?

Jack of Clubs – Instead of moving forward proactively toward my goals concerning the business, now is a time to step back and allow a bit of distance from that constant push to keep moving forward.  Enjoy the pause instead of pushing for more.  Allow this time to be a time of enjoyment and discovery rather than the slave driver mentality you so often demand of yourself.

DECK USED:  AVES UNCAGED BICYCLE PLAYING CARDS

Coming Back Out On Top

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Today’s meditation was skipped because the girls would just NOT leave me the fuck ALONE today.  I don’t know what it is but there are just some days where they can’t seem to leave me be for even a few minutes. I’m not in the room with them which means I’m missing and alone and they just can’t help but come find me and bug me.  With Luna, this is accepted and she will find somewhere quiet to sit and wait.  The girls? Not so much.

Romantic Tarot and Thera-Pets CardsToday’s draw is the Page of Pentacles, which is traditionally a representation of slow but steady progress in finding ways to improve one’s financial situation, resources and home life, or health.

I really like this representation of the Page of Coins (Pentacles) as what I see here is someone that is down on their luck but proactively working towards bettering their situation.  This is not an aspect of the Page of Coins that you often see depicted in deck imagery.

When combined with the words on the Thera-Pets card, the message here has to do with resilency and in picking yourself up after you are knocked down.

Lately I’ve been dealing with a pretty deep depressive episode, and it’s been a real struggle.  I found the bottom of that deep, dark pit and I landed there and lingered for about two days.  Then, I have begun to climb once more.  The meaning in these cards is that I’ve survived this before, I know the way forward, and I will climb back out again.  I will heal and recover and move forward.  The climb might be hard, and take time, but I’m strong enough and capable enough to make the journey and come back out on top once more.

DECK USED:  ROMANTIC TAROT AND THERA-PETS EMOTIONAL SUPPORT ANIMAL CARDS

LionHart’s Mercury Retrograde Tarot Challenge Prompt
Question:  What should I give closure to before February 27th (Full Moon)?

Fifth Spirit Tarot

 Reading Summary: The ups and downs in your life (Wheel of Fortune) are not something to feel victimized by (Justice Rx) so don’t give up the good fight (Seven of Wands Rx).

Take Away:  Again we see reference here to the struggle I am going through with my depression, but this also goes beyond that to my worries about my business and the Canadian side of things. It’s important to remember that the situations that we find ourselves in at this moment when the world is turned upside down are not situations against us personally.  They are situations we must deal with and survive, adapt to and work around… but they are not directed at us.

The cards here are a reminder that this is not a time to play victim, but rather a time to stand up and keep fighting for what you believe in, what you want, and what is right for (and important to) you.

DECK USED:  FIFTH SPIRIT TAROT

#DiscordTarotolicsFeb2021 Challenge Prompt
Question:   Where in my life do I need to set healthier boundaries?

Romantic TarotReading Summary: Know where your bread is buttered (Ten of Cups) and where it’s not (Eight of Cups).  Take that knowledge forward with you to discover (Page of Swords) what really makes life worth living (imagery in the Eight of Coins).

Okay so, I just have to say… the imagery in the Eight of Cups in this deck reminds me of that line in the Semisonic song “Closing Time” that says “you don’t have to go home, but you can’t stay here”.

Take Away: This is about choosing wisely where you invest your energy and time.  Instead of pushing to do everything, set better boundaries for yourself that create the opportunity for you to be more discerning.  Invest that time, energy, and talent that you have in those things that bring you comfort and joy.

DECK USED:  ROMANTIC TAROT

Daily Self Kindness

Today is the first day of my week off of work.  Not that I’m not still working at the farm, mind you, but I’m not working for the home business for the next handful of days.  I tried to take time off in January, but I think that I was still “coming down” off all the adrenaline, endorphins, and dopamine of the whole holiday rush thing and the vacation time just didn’t do as much for me as it otherwise could have.  Not that I didn’t need it then, but… yeah.   So all of the shops are on a shipping delay for the week and I’m taking time off.  I also soaked in the bathtub today.

Gideon’s Challenge

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IMG_4274A Morning Meditation

Chilled stone
numbing resting cheeks
as wet sand
soaks denim knees
while misty mornings
filled with fog
turn desolation
into mystery
and crisp air
stings cheeks
as a train whistle blows
in the distance

Photo © ZenStatePhotography

Day-to-Day Divination

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Prompt: “How do you incorporate divination into your day-to-day life?“

Ok so first, I guess that I should point out that, although I know a vast array of divination techniques including pendulums, rune casting, charm casting, stick and stone casting, stichomancy (aka bibliomancy with regular books), tasseomancy, dice casting, etc… my main method of divination is (not surprising anyone here) cards. All kinds of cards, but cards all the same. So when I refer to day-to-day divination, it is with this method I refer to, as the others are just occasional use. So, here we go…

1) For the past two years, I have been doing a COTD mental health exercise. My shrink wanted me to start a “daily affirmation” meditation exercise. But none of the affirmation generators I could find were giving me anything I could relate to or even take seriously. I switched it up to a COTD exercise where I ask for “a positive message to carry with me throughout my day and foster perspective” and whatever card comes out I have to find the positive message in the card for me that day, then meditate on it and journal it. Surprisingly, it has helped immensely in my day-to-day life, and also in climbing back out of the dark pit of depression whenever an MDE sneaks up and swallows me whole.

2) Client readings. It’s nearly a daily thing. So… yeah. Client readings.

3) Writing exercises. I often use cards as prompts and as “flavor” in my writing, whether it’s just little short stories, a poem, or long drawn out interactive storytelling with Gideon.

4) Teaching. I teach tarot, lenormand, and cartomancy. At any time over the past decade (or so) I have sustained between 1 and 6 pupils/mentees depending on my workload and energy levels. Not to mention past pupils and mentees that come back from time to time with questions, thoughts, or just a need to discuss something in order to help them wrap their head around it a bit better.

5) I help run a server that is a tarot focused learning environment on Discord. I occasionally teach classes on the server, and I spend a good deal of time there helping others, answering questions, and just hanging out with others with similar interests.

6) Personal readings. I read for myself daily by doing monthly challenges, and I share those readings here on my blog as well as on the server mentioned above. The purpose of this is three fold, as it allows me to check in on myself, it allows Gideon to check in on me and get an in-depth look at how I’m doing emotionally and otherwise, and it provides examples for that learning server I mentioned for those that want or need to observe how others read the cards and their process in doing so.

Thinks… I think that’s it. It’s probably not, but I think it is.

Oh yeah. Lets not forget about deck shopping. I window shop (and often buy) decks on a pretty regular basis.

Abandoning Negative Narratives

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Today’s meditation was just over twelve minutes long and was a guided meditation through the Calm app without the interval timer as I did not do my piriformis stretches during my meditation today.

The focus of today’s meditation was about self-kindness and self-care.  It was about making sure that you are treating yourself as good as you treat others, and giving yourself the same forgiveness and understanding that you offer to others on a daily basis.

This is a topic that I struggle with, and every day I work hard to minimize my inner negative narrative that is vicious and cruel, and allow myself more kindness, forgiveness, and understanding.   Sometimes it is easier than others, and other times it feels nearly impossible.  But, I think an important thing to remember is that I keep trying… and I will continue to keep trying.

Elemental Power Tarot and Thera-Pets CardsToday’s draw is the Eight of Cups, which is traditionally a representation of moving on due to a sense of dissatisfaction or disappointment.  This is the “fuck it, I’m leaving” card, and is about abandoning that which is not working for you in pursuit of something that will.

Gideon has given me these super cute Thera-Pets Emotional Support Animal Cards recently as a “just because” gift, and I am going to be using them in conjunction with my daily draw for the next little while.  I plan to go through the entire deck, so it should take about two months.

The combination of the “abandoning what doesn’t work” from the Eight of Cups joined with the words on the Thera-Pets card for the day speak of a message concerning abandoning what is hurting me and dragging me down.  This is my inner voice, which during my depression has been furtively pervasive, sneaking around behind the scenes and whispering incessantly in my ear.

These cards combined are a reminder to keep working at moving away from that negative voice.  Keep working on fostering optimism in order to move my emotional state, and with it my perception of my own personal values, into a better place.

DECK USED:  ELEMENTAL POWER TAROT AND THERA-PETS EMOTIONAL SUPPORT ANIMAL CARDS

The Radical Love Tarot Challenge Prompt
Topic:  Rooting
Question: How can better I follow through on making more time in my life for rooting?

Tarocco Sopraffino Anima Antiqua

Reading Summary: Do it when you feel the need (Eight of Cups), and when you feel conflicted (Five of Wands) and are in need calm (Temperance). Don’t hesitate and wait for better timing (Knight of Coins Rx). Just do it as it will ground you and make you feel better (Four of Wands).

Reading Note: Okay so, “rooting” to me means something very specific that it might not mean the same to other people. Essentially rooting to me means lying down in the forest and feeling the “roots” of my energy dig into the soil while the “tree” of my energy stretches above. This is a meditative exercise that is highly immersive, and usually takes a good deal of time.

Take Away:  The advice here is to allow these things (feeling the need/feeling conflicted/etc) to be the trigger that pushes me to go do your rooting.  Instead of resisting that need and putting it off until it’s convenient, it’s about doing it and getting it done.  Stop resisting and help yourself feel better.

DECK USED:  TAROCCO SOPRAFFINO ANIMA ANTIQUA

#DiscordTarotolicsFeb2021 Challenge Prompt
Question:  How can I be a better friend to those closest to me at this time?

Reading Summary: Keep in mind (Ace of Swords) and be proactive about fostering (Knight of Pentacles) what is needed to keep them happy and healthy (The Sun) as you move forward.

Take Away: This is about thinking un-selfishly.  It’s about making sure you are paying attention to what they enjoy and what they like, and being proactive about encouraging those things in them and supporting their pursuit of those things.

This isn’t you actually providing these things that bring them joy, but rather supporting them as they go after those things themselves.

DECK USED:  ELEMENTAL POWER TAROT

Daily Self Kindness

I got tags added to a basket full of swaddled decks.   Beside keeping track of each swaddle’s color and design in my decks spreadsheet, I also print off “tags” (little 2″ x 1″ pieces of thick cardstock) that have the title of the deck on it and then I slip it into the pocket of the deck’s swaddle.  This makes confirming that I’ve grabbed the right deck much easier as I don’t have to unwrap the deck, just pull out the tag and look at it.   I’ve had a whole stack of tags piling up for some time, and a whole basket of swaddled decks that needed the tags added to them as a result.  It felt really good to get all the tags done and the decks put away in their respective spots as a result.

Gideon’s Challenge

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Saying Goodbye

Shattered windows
and crumbling walls
when wind blows
shingles fall
yet still she stands
old and strong
creaking timbers
join winter’s song
in summer time
she will fall
tumbling down
’til flattened all

Photo © ZenStatePhotography