Rest Is Allowed

IMG_9226Today’s meditation was just over eleven minutes long and was a guided meditation from the Calm app with added interval timer for my piriformis stretches.

The focus of today’s meditation was about Shamatha, which is a form of Buddhist meditation where you focus your mind upon a single point and use that focus to clear and calm one’s conscious thoughts.

This is the sort of meditation that I am most familiar with and the talk concerning it’s practice and benefits really didn’t say anything new or anything I wasn’t already aware of.  I found myself instead tuning out the woman’s voice and listening, instead, to the water drop like background music as I often do.

Cosmic Slumber Tarot - Four of CupsToday’s draw is the Four of Cups, which is traditionally a representation of creating distance due to apathy or disinterest, meditation, or taking time to reevaluate one’s situation or emotions.

The thing is?  This card was far more literal in its imagery than normal today.  I very much just napped my day away, just like the person lying on the beach, toes tickled by waves as they doze in the sand.  So too did I sleep… and sleep… and sleep.

It’s not surprising, since I pulled an all-nighter last night and didn’t get to bed until 5:30 in the morning. The message here, though, has to do with allowing yourself that rest more than the rest itself.  Everyone needs a break now and then.  Today’s card points out that my sleeping all day had far less to do with hiding from my depression and retreating from the world… and everything to do with the need for some sleep.

Therefore, the message in today’s card is about sometimes rest being about self care, and not retreat at all.  And that’s not something to feel guilty about, but a natural biological need.


LionHart’s Mercury Retrograde Tarot Challenge Prompt
:  A reminder of why I deserve the good (I want) in my life.

Lonely Ice Tarot

Eight of Coins – You are a good and dedicated worker. Over time you have used your time and focus to hone your skills into an expertise (or three) that can be used to help in ushering in those good things you want out of life like stability and security.

Six of Coins atop The Moon – You reach out to help others through their times of uncertainty, providing an ear or a shoulder for their worries, and help in finding ways to overcome their uncertainty and fear and turn these things around into a direction that is authentic to them and their own path.

Page of Swords – You are always seeking a better way to understand and communicate with others. Better strategies to try to reach your aspirations. This constant openness to learning how to find a better way allows for good things to come to you more easily as you are erecting less hurdles and blocks to get in the way.


#DiscordTarotolicsFeb2021 Challenge Prompt
:  Over what part of my life do I need to release some control?

Cosmic Slumber TarotReading Summary: Responsibilities and strategy toward my aspirations (King of Swords) need to be set aside. You don’t get to control this (Strength Rx). Just let I the crappy shit happen for right now (Ten of Swords).

Take Away: This is called being given a talking to by the cards.  I softened the message above, but it is pretty clear and blunt that at the moment I need to just let myself be in the depression. I have no control here and scrabbling for it isn’t helping anything.  Pretending you are in control is also not helping anything.  

It doesn’t mean wallow, but it does mean letting go and accepting that things will begin to get better at their own pace, not at whatever pace I want them to or try to set for them to move at.


Daily Self Kindness

As mentioned in the COTD section of this post, I consciously made the choice to not beat myself up after spending a good deal of my day asleep rather than up and being productive. Normally, regardless of not getting to bed by 5:30am, I would have made myself get up and stay up through the day instead of accepting that I needed the sleep and allowing it to happen guilt-free.

Morning Bonus Read – Mercury Retrograde

Under the Roses Lenormand - Mercury Rx Tarot Spread

What is the main theme of this Mercury Retrograde for me?

Clouds – This was actually the card I expected to hop out, as it is very clear that the theme of this Mercury Rx for me is all about the current major depressive episode I am going through from its descent to (we can hope) the beginning of climbing back out again.  I don’t have the expectation that I will be able to pull out of it so quickly, but this card gives me hope that my ascent might begin around the same time as the Mercury Rx comes to an end (around February 21st or there about, if I’m not mistaken).

How am I asked to honor my feelings and current Rx vibes?

Whip – It is important to remember that the self flagellation and dark inner narratives in your head are dangerous.  Respect their power and work on coming out on top by acknowledging their existence.  It is only through awareness that you can overcome their influences.  Stay focused on where you want to go and determined to make your way there as you move through the mire of your depression and you will eventually come out the victor over these challenges.

What am I asked to reflect on throughout Mercury Retrograde?

Crossroads – Now is the time to reflect on your choices.  Where do you want to go from here and how do you want to get there?  You have choices, even now in the middle of your depression.  Are you going to focus on doing the healthy things that will help you to climb out of the pit more quickly? Or sink into the mire and allow it to cradle you and eat away at your insides while it pretends to be comforting you?  You need to keep these things in mind as you go through this struggle so that you can recover as smoothly and easily as possible once the clouded darkness begins to ease its grip.