It’s In Your Head

Today’s meditation was skipped again.  I know that I should be doing my meditation because I’m having a bit of an issue with my anxiety, and yet the anxiety seems to make it so that it’s nearly impossible for me to even consider doing the meditation.   I need to buckle down and just do it.

Nano Starseeds Tarot - Nine of SwordsToday’s draw is the Nine of Swords, which is traditionally a representation of themes that have to do with nightmares, anxiety, stress, and insomnia.

What stands out to me in this card’s imagery today is that I have absolutely NO idea what the pop culture references are in this card.  I know the figure and the dog are dressed up as something, but I’m completely lost on the reference.

It’s in that cluelessness that the message lies, because like with most anxiety and stress, my current issues with anxiety reside in the unknown.  Something is coming, I know it’s coming.  I can feel that it’s coming…. but I don’t know what.  I have clues and ideas what it may be, but no specifics.

The reminder in the Nine of Swords is that anxiety is a part of the mind. It’s not some weird physical ailment inflicted upon you out of nowhere, but rather is a physical manifestation of what is going on in your brain, whether it’s in the conscious mind or the subconscious one.   I need to do what I can to calm my mind, and my nerves and anxiety will then follow.   In other words… the message in today’s card is to get off my ass and start doing my daily meditation again.


#ConnectWithYourDeckChallenge by E Roebuck-Jones
Question: How can I continue to learn from my life’s struggles?

Broken Mirror Tarot 4th Edition

Reading Summary:  It’s important to evaluate what it is you value most (Nine of Coins) instead of trying to defend everything you do and don’t value as a whole (Nine of Wands), because you can’t take it all with you (Six of Swords).

Take Away:  One of the purposes of my struggles in life is to learn that you “can’t take it all with you” and so you need to choose those things that are most important to you to defend and protect.  Without this sense of discernment, it’s too easy to become overwhelmed crack under the weight of too much responsibility.


#DiscordTarotolicsFeb2021 Challenge Prompt
:  How can I better handle and/or respond to criticism?

Nano Starseeds TarotHow can I better handle criticism?

Six of Wands and Ten of Swords – Remember that although we all want to feel as if we are appreciated and have our accomplishments lauded, criticism (both the constructive kind and not) can help us to find a better way of doing things than what we’re already doing.  It hurts… it can hurt a lot.  But, it also gives us an opportunity to learn and try again… and do better the next time around.

How can I better respond to criticism?

Strength Rx and Nine of Coins – Let it go and instead focus upon the good stuff in life.  Sometimes criticism hurts, even the constructive kind, and it’s important to be able to let that go and take value where you can get it then apply that to your own life to make your own “coins” shine even brighter.  At other times, useless criticism can be the most venomous of all, and you can use those good things involved to help you let go of the pain and focus on what really matters.


Daily Self Kindness

I made the decision to change my trip to the post office from Friday to tomorrow to help confront that oncoming “bad news” I feel is coming and get it over with (or maybe… just maybe… manage to avoid it all together).

Morning Bonus Read – The Soul’s Spread

The Soul's Spread - Rusted Lenormand

1. What I should Silence of my Past?

Cross – The pain and emotional burdens of what has been placed upon me by others.  I bear many negative emotions and an intense amount of negative inner narrative that was birthed out of my past.  It’s time to begin more actively working on silencing those inner narratives and emotions spawned within my formative years.

2. What I should Silence of my Environment?

Lily – Again we are lead to themes of family legacy and those that can influence us from our past.  In my current environment the only person that currently fits this particular card is my mother and my aunt.  Both are quite toxic and the advice of the lily in this position is that I need to take what they say (to me and about me) with calm wisdom and a grain of salt.

3. What Fear I should Silence?

Broom – Being beaten down and “swept under the rug”. The Broom is also the Whip and speaks of self flagellation and punishment (among other things).  The fear here is about my inner voice that speaks of me being nothing ending up being true and a self fulfilling prophecy where it goes from a whisper in my mind to something others actually think and feel.  It is an irrational fear.

4. What Fear I should Listen To?

Letter –  Bad news is coming. My intuition has been screaming at me all week.  In fact, I’ve even changed some of my normal schedule to adjust to avoid a few things that I was then hoping might ease those feeling. It’s coming, and I need to be prepared for it.  

5. What in my Environment I should Listen To?

Anchor – As this bad news mentioned above approaches (and eventually arrives) I need to make sure I am focusing upon my environment and keeping things balanced and stable through the disruption. Don’t allow everything to fall apart due to panic or uncertainty, but instead ground yourself and stay that way.

6. What I should Listen To from my Past?

Ship – Keep in mind how I have handled difficulties in the past in my travels up north to the post office. The issues coming feel like they are coming from that direction and the advice here is to pull on my experience with past encounters and experiences to help me through any issues I run across this time around.

7. My Soul’s Song (Inner Drive)?

Bouquet – Remember what lies beyond this week.  Vacation is coming.  Time off is coming.  This is good news and well needed, and will give you the opportunity to relax and enjoy yourself for a bit.  Allow thoughts of this to lighten your heart and give you something to look forward to on the other side of this week’s stresses and turmoil.