Creation Through Conflict

Today’s meditation was ten minutes long and focused on a full body scan for the most part.  It was not a guided meditation, and although I had intended on going for a full fifteen minutes, I was interrupted by a phone call from the doctor’s office and couldn’t get back into it after I’d hung up.  (Everything is fine, it’s just bloodwork related.)

Spacious Tarot Today’s draw is the Five of Wands, which is traditionally a representation of tests, trials, and conflict in the area of one’s ambitions, passions, and drive.

What I see, though?  Is spark.

The message contained in the Five of Wands in today’s draw is that sometimes conflict actually has the potential to create.  It has the ability to get the juices flowing and, although conflict and trials can be a struggle, they can also provide a much needed clearing of air and energy, which makes room for something new and better.


#TarotForGrowthJanuary Challenge Prompt
: What does my mind want me to know about 2020?

Lost Forest Tarot

Reading Summary:  I need to take time to examine what I’ve done and what I can do better (Judgement), especially in the area of what I want from my business (Queen of Fire), and in which direction I want to push it in (Knight of Fire).

Take Away:  I very often associate my creative business with fire, as that is a huge part of where my inner spark and drive are directed.  It’s no different here, where the answer to what my mind wants me to know for the year ahead focuses upon that business.  This is a reminder to look back at the time that has passed and base my future momentum upon what has and has not worked rather than constantly focusing on what I want in the future.


#DiscordTarotholicsJan2020 Challenge Prompt
: What do you feel you deserve?

Beautiful Creatures TarotReading Summary:  The desire for something better (Six of Swords) obtained through a combination of optimism (The Sun),  self possession and strength (The Emperor), collaboration with others (Three of Coins), and a nurturing warmth towards myself and others (The Empress).

Take Away:  What I see here are the elements that I feel I am not strong enough in.  Elements that are building blocks to a change for the better, but are not my strongest qualities.  Considering the question, the cards indicate I believe I deserve to be better at these particular qualities and, as a result, deserve for things to be better in my life because of them.

It is not realistic, of course, as you do not miraculously develop such qualities… you learn them and work at them.   They are something to strive for, not something to simply obtain.


#ConnectWithYourDeckChallenge Prompt
: Three cards that pertain to my goals.  (Rephrased for specificity.)

The Arcana Tarot

Reading Summary:  Lots of appearances of the King of Wands over the past few days for me.   If I want to find a sense of balance between my struggle for security (Nine of Wands) and a sense of contentment (Nine of Cups), I need to work at embodying a more controlled attitude toward my passions and drive (King of Wands).

Take Away:  A lot of times my passions and drive, both for the creative aspects of my business as well as my business as a whole, cause me to push too hard.  This creates a sense of imbalance and defensiveness that does not at all foster a sense of contentment.  If I apply more control and mediation to my drive, I can find a better balance and feel more satisfaction with my work.



Self Care Saturday (on Sunday)

As I’ve mentioned before, these readings are (not usually) bearing in on any one thing or event in my life, as the question used is asking for a more general outlook. This is a self care exercise, and are not meant as a predictive reading.

The question is… What do I need to focus for self-care through the week ahead?


EarthPage of Swords, Elevate, and Be Careful Signing Contracts – Hmmmm… I wonder if my mortgage contract is coming up for renewal this week. I need to call the bank on Monday and check. I am also currently in the process of changing my medical insurance to a different provider. The cards are indicating something along these lines needs to be taken care of and re-evaluated to provide myself with a better position than the one I’m currently in.

AirThree of Wands, Ace of Swords, and You Are Not Alone in This Uncertain Place – I need to remember that even though I am feeling unbalanced and uncertain while reorganizing how I run things with the business, I have people around me who love me and are willing to provide help or support as needed. I don’t have to do it alone, and it’s okay to ask for help when needed.

WaterThe Moon and Not My Circus Not My Monkeys – Tend to your own garden and don’t let other people pull you into their chaos and drama. Allowing that will just cause confusion and lack of clarity.

AirAce of Pentacles, King of Swords, and The Enemy of Intuition is Self Doubt – Stay centered while on this new path with my ambition and passions, because you don’t want to allow self-doubt to filter in and screw with your perceptions and plans.

WaningLa Ruche et Surmenage – Don’t forget there is a life outside of work and running the business. It might feel like you’re not getting a lot done, but sometimes you need to take time to rest and step away, regroup and then come back fresh later on.

WaxingLa Tortue et Sagesse, L’anneau et Union – Wisdom and longevity in a solid and beneficial union. I definitely need to check on my mortgage contract and take a close and careful look at the new medical insurance package and contract.

Take Away – There’s going to be an element of self doubt and uncertainty in the week ahead and the plans I have been in the beginning stages of implementing to change some of the aspects of my business and work. It’ll be important to stay on track and pay close attention to my own issues and let others deal with their own shit this week rather than trying to help out.

Also, be sure to contact the bank to check on my mortgage contract, and take a close look at my new benefits package and make sure everything in there is as it should be and to my advantage.