Month: February 2021

The Nature of Value

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Today’s meditation was supposed to be another installment of the mantra meditation, but it turns out I was so beat that I ended up dozing off within the first couple of minutes of the meditation.  So… today’s meditation was skipped and I had a nap instead.  I will pick it back up tomorrow.

Tarot Skrytých Světů and Thera-Pets Emotional Support Animal CardsToday’s draw is the Six of Pentacles, which is traditionally a representation of generosity, being receptive to help, and the giving and receiving that is involved in balancing the scales between the “haves” and the “have nots”.

Like so many of the cards in this deck, I see a lot of fae energy in this card.  The piper that coaxes wealth from stone, the seedling below that absorbs that wealth like mana from the gods. In the image here we have not just the have and have not but rather we have one that can coax what is needed from the world around him, draw it out to shower upon the one in need that lies below. This is an exchange of not wealth but energy.

Combined with the Thera-Pets card for today, the message that I see here is that sometimes we need to look to others for inspiration.  Outside sources can sometimes give us the added oomph needed to do the things that need to be done… including the self care we need for ourselves.

I find this in my relationship with Gideon. Not once in the nearly thirteen years of our relationship have we ever borrowed, loaned, given, or requested for monetary support from each other.  Not once.  Not once has money ever been offered or asked for.

Instead, the exchange between us is in something far more valuable.  He receives from me what he finds of greatest value (and to be fair I am not sure what these things are, but I would guess that a part of it is my encouragement for him to be a better man, to do better and be better and shine brighter)…. and in turn I receive from him those things of greatest value that I need.  Support and love, encouragement and nurturing.  He gives me strength… and helps me be accountable to how I treat myself. That is the mana he provides to me in my life.

DECK USED:  TAROT SKRYTÝCH SVĚTŮ (SHADOWSCAPES TAROT CZECH VERSION) AND THERA-PETS EMOTIONAL SUPPORT ANIMAL CARDS

The Radical Love Tarot Challenge Prompt
Topic: Moments of resonance
Question: How can I listen more closely and go more deeply into my moments of resonance?

Fournier's Tarot Cats by Ana Juan

How can I listen more closely to my moments of resonance?
Ten of Pentacles and Nine of Cups

Be settled and grounded and grateful.  This is about balance and security, and the need for both in order to hear more clearly what those moments mean and where they come from.  When distracted by chaos or imbalance, it becomes harder to focus on those moments, and harder to render meaning from them, because there’s so much going on that’s pulling your attention away from that feeling of resonance deep within.

How can I go more deeply into my moments of resonance?
King of Swords Rx and Eight of Cups

Don’t over think it and instead let it lead you to new horizons. Moments of resonance are about intuition. Using too much reason and analytical thinking will just pick them apart and leave them like tiny pieces of shredded paper on the floor.  Instead of dissecting these feelings and invalidating them with logic and reason, allow them to take you forward into the sensation itself and introduce you to new understanding about what feels right for you and you alone..

DECK USED:  FOURNIER’S TAROT CATS BY ANA JUAN

#DiscordTarotolicsFeb2021 Challenge Prompt
Question:  How can I best work at improving the skill of a more gentle and nurturing delivery during readings?

Tarot Skrytých SvětůReading Summary: Acknowledge that using a nudging and persuasive tone (Strength) is too much too fast for some people (Four of Swords Rx). Instead, slow down (Knight of Pentacles) and allow a warmth to overlay (Queen of Pentacles) your normally more forceful approach.

Take Away: Although my reading for others is focused on empowerment and helping them, sometimes I come off too strong in this regard and it feels like “too much” in the moment.  To temper this, I need to slow down and focus on instilling more warmth into my delivery.  It’s not about giving them a shoulder to cry on but rather providing a glowing center of warmth and caring that threads through that message of empowerment.  In slowing down, it then is easier for them to digest and the warmth further makes acceptance of what’s being said go more smoothly and easily.

DECK USED:  TAROT SKRYTÝCH SVĚTŮ (SHADOWSCAPES TAROT CZECH VERSION)

Daily Self Kindness

When I realized I had dozed off into a nap during my meditation, I didn’t berate myself or shame myself for it.  Instead I wallowed into the pillow and enjoyed the relaxation.

Gideon’s Challenge

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Snowy BridgeSenseless Temptation

Pristine beauty
untouched white
as only little birds
disturb the snow
In the cold
I stand
and watch
water ripple
fighting the urge
to set bare feet
to snow
then dive in
and freeze

Photo © ZenStatePhotography

Music to Craft By

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Today’s question is brought to you by two of the witchy type servers that I’m a member of on Discord. Both servers asked the exact same question within a few days of each other and I thought it might make for a good topic here.

Prompt from Server #1: “What song(s) put you in a witchy mood?”
Prompt from Server #2: “What kind of music do you like to listen to when you work magic?“

Okay, so I love music. I really do. But, there are a number of activities that I can’t do while listening to music. Because I have sound → sensation/smell/taste synesthesia, music can often have unintended distractionary repercussions, so I have to be careful to what I listen to and when. For example, I have a playlist of music I can listen to while driving because none of the songs cause me physical sensations that would distract me from what I’m doing. I couldn’t guarantee that if I were listening to the radio, where a song or sound might come up that could create a painful pinch in my hand or arm, or a pins and needles sensation in my foot or leg.

For this reason, most of the time when doing spellcraft and different spiritual workings, I don’t use music as it can create “phantom sensations” that can be distracting. That said, I do have a playlist full of certain songs that safely “fit the mood” that I will use when I want to include music. Some of those include…

Terra Firma by Delerium


Silence by Delerium


Dissolved Girl by Massive Attack


Black Milk by Massive Attack


All Mine by Portishead


To Be Free by Emiliana Torrini

Not all of these (or all of those on the playlist) are sensation-free sound. But none of them create unpleasant sensations, smells, or tastes that might distract me from my focus. And, of course, all have the same “vibe” to the music that helps “set the mood” that I like for spellcraft and witchy-type activities. I think that for a lot of people, music can really add another level of depth to their practice, and even another element of “flavor” to the magic itself.

Stronger Together

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IMG_9461Today’s meditation was just a bit over seventeen minutes long and was the third installment of the mantra course on the Oak app.  I included the interval timer for my piriformis stretches as well.

The focus of today’s meditation was (surprise, surprise) using mantra in meditation.  For this particular segment of the course, there was no vocalization of the mantra at the beginning and, although I know this wasn’t the intent of having the mantras be a mental exercise instead of a vocal one?  I feel so included.  Silly, I know.  But it’s really nice to be able to follow along without having to improvise due to my mutism.

Now… that’s all well and good, and the meditation was relaxing… you know I can’t not say something about the quote included in today’s meditation.   I really dislike this Lao Tzu quote, as I’ve mentioned before. Yes, nature does not hurry.  No, everything does not get accomplished.  That’s the whole point of changing seasons. Flowers die before they can bloom, leaves fall before they’ve turned, animals die because winter came early… not everything gets accomplished.   The quote makes absolutely no sense and I have no idea why it is so popular.

Fifth Spirit Tarot and Thera-Pets Emotional Support Animal CardsToday’s draw is the Ten of Cups, which is traditionally a representation of moving beyond emotional contentment to happiness and sharing this emotional abundance with those around you. It’s about positive relationships and a sense of harmony shared with friends, family, and loved ones.

I really like the imagery in this card.  At first, the card seems a bit plain other than the dancing fish.  And then, when you look closer you see that the cups that are overflowing with a wealth of water (emotions) are of all sorts.  Wine glasses and baby bottles, sippy cups and dog bowls and mugs and saki cups.  There are all types to represent all the different types of people that make up the emotional bonds of family and friends in life. The imagery here very literally is a visual representation of the Hebrew bible phrase “My cup overfloweth,” which for those that are unfamiliar with the phrase, means “I have more than enough for my needs”.

When combined with today’s Thera-Pets card, the message in today’s cards is that the current journey through struggle and strife is not a journey taken alone.  Loved ones are there in good times and bad, and those that truly love you will support you even when you’re going through the worst of it.   Don’t forsake their support when you need a little help, instead let them lift you up and remind you that as strong and capable as you are?  You’re even stronger and more capable together.

DECK USED:  FIFTH SPIRIT TAROT AND THERA-PETS EMOTIONAL SUPPORT ANIMAL CARDS

LionHart’s Mercury Retrograde Tarot Challenge Prompt
Question:  What am I asked to (gently) let go of during this Full Moon?

Paulina Tarot

 Reading Summary: Use your ability to inspire yourself and others (Queen of Wands) to gently begin nudging out the sadness and depression (Three of Swords) that has been stealing all of your attention lately (Seven of Swords).

Take Away:  The figure in the Three of Swords so obviously needs a nudge to get them off their stool, but that nudge just as obviously needs to be soft and gentle.  The energy of inspiration can be gentle, but that takes a little more focus than just whisking yourself away in the inspiration.  Instead this is about giving yourself the inspiration to get off the stool, not to pretend that things are fine but simply to help straighten the spine and start moving.   At one time or another the time comes to stop looking at the big baddie that has oppressed you and start looking forward instead. During this full moon it is time to stop staring over your shoulder so intently…. and look forward instead.

DECK USED:  PAULINA TAROT

#DiscordTarotolicsFeb2021 Challenge Prompt
Question:  What skill in my tarot practice needs improvement?

Fifth Spirit TarotReading Summary: I need to work on being more gentle and nurturing (The Empress) in my delivery (King of Swords with the megaphone and the Five of Swords positioned to surround The Empress on all sides..

Take Away: True enough.  I am always very focused on being empowering to those that I read for (as well as for myself) that sometimes I forget that there are times when a delivery also needs to be gentle and nurturing.  My readings often hand people the facts in a way to “light a fire under their ass” and I rarely coddle.

This means that my skills at coddling are not as strong as they could be, and as a result I can often come off a bit harsh, or even confrontational.

DECK USED:  FIFTH SPIRIT TAROT

Daily Self Kindness

I took a pain pill.  My foot was really bothering me today and even after I put it up for a bit it wouldn’t ease up on the throbbing ache.   It isn’t hot, so it’s not an infection.   So I went ahead and took half a vicodin along with my ibuprofen.

Gideon’s Challenge

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Crow in a ThicketThe Hidden

A tangled thicket
of dark branches
which
rattle and scrape
with each slight
frozen breeze
yet deep within
sheltered and safe
lies a spark
of life
waiting for warmth
and a chance
to break out
and be free.

Photo © ZenStatePhotography

Full Moon in Virgo – February 2021

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In a couple of days, it will be the full moon, and like all new moons and full moons, I did a spread aligned to the moon’s current themes as a part of my recognition of the moon’s cycle and influences upon us. Today’s spread is about the medicine within, and brought to you by Sharron Basanti of Seeds of Shakti.

Virgo Full Moon Tarot Spread - Jonasa Jaus Tarot 5th Edition

1. What medicine does the Virgo Full Moon offer?

Ten of Swords – You are coming to the end of a harsh and harrowing journey.  It hurts so bad, the pain you have sustained is great, but with the end of one journey comes the promise of something new beyond.  Although you are not yet at the “something new” stage, the Virgo full moon offers you the tail end of that long and arduous path that you’ve been struggling down.

2. What area in my life needs more structure and organization?

Wheel of Fortune – No shit. *Clears his throat.* Right. So the reference here has to do with how one feels when the wheel is turning, yeah? Consider that you stand on a playground merry-go-round. If you stand at the edge of the ride, then as it spins you feel the centrifugal force so strongly that it is hard to hold on, let alone do anything other than hold on. By the same turn, as you move closer to the center of the ride, the pull to the outer edges is decreased. You can stand up straight and not hold on so tightly, etc. There is less pulling against you… and less chaos as a result.

What needs more structure and organization in my life is my perception of life as a whole. I need to move towards the center of the wheel… I need to center and ground and find that balance that can only be found by finding one’s center instead of being pulled wildly outward toward the edges.

3a. What lifestyle changes would my body benefit from?

Hanged Man – More time taking a pause. More personal time. More time settled within those quiet and still  places that allow me to find myself and thus find perspective and peace. When things are feeling off center and chaotic, it is difficult to focus on your health and well being.

3b. What lifestyle changes would my mind benefit from?

King of Pentacles – Again we see a reference to being grounded and focusing upon one’s roots.  The King of Pentacles indicates that I need to focus on the stability and security that I have spent a lifetime accruing.  Allow it to provide reassurance and take strength and comfort from the fact that everything stable in my home life right now.

3c. What lifestyle changes would my heart benefit from?

The Empress – And a connection to the earth and grounding again is indicated here in the Empress, who provides a reminder that caring for yourself and others needs to be more important than more material pursuits. This card indicates that during this full moon, it’s important to keep my focus set upon my self care and the care of those around me.  And here we again see an encouragement to get out in nature and benefit from mother nature’s influences on my own mind, energy, and emotions.

4. What project that has been on the back burner forever needs to be revisited and completed?

Seven of Wands – I often see this card as “fighting the good fight”, and to be honest… that effort along with everything else has had to be on the back burner lately while I dealt with my depression.  I do not think that this is the kind of endeavor that can be completed, but I do think that as I stretch further towards the light at the end of my depressive episode, I will be able to re-engage in standing up for and defending those things I believe in.

5. Message from the Ancestors.

Page of Swords – Remember that this is a learning experience.  Not just the depression, although that too is its own learning experience.  But life.  Life is a learning experience.  it’s not a race or a battle, but rather one learning experience after another on a journey towards growth and becoming more (and better) than what we are today.

DECK USED: JONASA JAUS TAROT 5TH EDITION