Keep Going

IMG_9948Today’s meditation was a little different than the norm because I didn’t use a timer at all, nor a guide.  I think the meditation was about a half hour long, but I’m not entirely sure. Instead of using these things, I chose to simply lay quietly and take time to breathe and listen to the world going about it’s business beyond my windows and walls. I did some small stretching, but nothing major, it was more just about being quiet and not allowing my brain to go through its normal constant litany of what needs done and what not to forget before I manage to write it all down.

Waterfall Tarot and Thera-Pets Emotional Support Animal CardsToday’s draw is the Six of Swords, which is traditionally a representation of leaving behind (and/or escaping) unhealthy or untenable situations for something better. Where the Eight of Cups is a decision based on an emotional reaction, in the Six of Swords the leaving is about practicality, and is rational and planned.

With how many changes have been going on in my life lately, from the climb out of depression’s pit to the shifts in my business due to the pandemic’s ever changing requirements, the Six of Swords is a fitting card.

Changes bring with them a sense of instability and uncertainty more often than not, and I’ve felt a good deal of that over the past few weeks as I adjusted (yet again) to the changes and adjustments that needed to be made for my business, and continued my climb out of the dark of depression into the light.   I am still climbing, but I can feel the improvement with each day that passes.  That improvement is still in baby steps, but those steps are perceptible now.

The combination of the Six of Swords with today’s Thera-Pets card is a reassurance that it is going to work out.  I’m headed in the right direction, I’m doing everything I can to move things forward and keep them going in the right direction.

Keep doing what you’re doing to keep things moving in a healthy direction and everything’s going to work out just fine.

DECK USED:  WATERFALL TAROT AND THERA-PETS EMOTIONAL SUPPORT ANIMAL CARDS

LionHart’s Whispering Woods Tarot Challenge Prompt
Topic
: Today I plant my seeds of growth knowing that…

Very Little Tarot

Reading Summary: …moving forward with your emotional growth (Page of Cups) has the potential to be a harrowing experience (Nine of Swords). But keep in mind that it’s something you really want to do (Ace of Wands), even if you have to stumble a bit along the way (The Fool) and feel like you’re fucking up now and then (Five of Coins).

Take Away:  There are times when trying to learn about and learn how to handle my own emotions makes me feel like a fucking idiot. It’s often a struggle and can be really disheartening, it can also lead to a bit of anxiety now and then when I can’t find the words to express an emotion I’ve yet to actually put a name to. During these times of struggle, I need to remember that the emotional growth I’m seeking is something I want… very much.  More than enough to deal with the discomfort of growing pains along the way.

DECK USED:  VERY LITTLE TAROT

#DiscordTarotolicsMar2021 Challenge Prompt
Question
: What do I need to focus on for self-care for this new moon?

Waterfall TarotReading Summary: Don’t get distracted (Three of Cups Rx) or allow yourself to become stagnant (Death Rx). Keep your eye on the prize and stay focused.  You’re not out of the woods yet, but you’re getting there (Page of Swords).

Take Away: My depression has been the focus of my readings for some time and goddamn if it doesn’t feel like beating a dead horse some times. But… It’s not done yet.  I’m still climbing.  I’m still seeking level ground and it’s going to take a bit longer to get there. The cards here indicate I need to make sure I stay focused on that goal and not allow distractions to turn into stagnancy that will hold me back or cause regression.

DECK USED:  WATERFALL TAROT

Daily Self Kindness

I allowed myself to do things at my own pace today instead of pushing my ass to get going at a faster speed. I noticed this because I did feel the urge to push, but consciously made the choice to pause and breathe, then keep on at that slower and more relaxed pace.

Morning Bonus Read – Pending Shadows

The prompt for this reading came from one of my Discord servers and is as follows:
Do you know you have shadow work hanging around but also know that you don’t have the mental energy to tackle it all yet? Do some mental and emotional preparation with these.
Theme: Make myself aware of what things I’m going to need to deal with but can’t yet.

Women Of History Playing Cards1.  What am I going to need to deal with soon, but right now I’m not ready yet?
Three of Diamonds atop King of Spades

Taxes.  Yes, I know the deadline is coming up, and I have quite a bit to get done in the interim between now and when I meet with my accountant again next month, but it’s one of those things that I need to work on one step at a time and I’m still not quite clear headed enough to manage it.  This might mean I need to file an extension this year.

Hopefully that will not be the case and with the help of L and Z as well as the accountant, I can get it done and checked and double checked in time.  I am aware that the depression cut into the time I would have normally spent on this over the past two months though, so it’s possible that extension might end up necessary whether I like it or not.

2.  Where did this come from?
Eight of Diamonds

Having a healthy and thriving business is something I’ve built up over time and as a result it seems the taxes involved become more of a pain in the ass with each passing year.  Fortunately, I have a good accountant on my side to help me get through  it.

3.  What steps should I healthily be taking now?
Five of Diamonds

Recognize that my feelings of scarcity are there to create a buffer of care and caution right now.  It allows me to step back and look at things with an unbiased and practical eye.  I recognize that these feelings of scarcity are false, but I can use them to better prepare and allow for a level of impartiality that would otherwise be difficult to accomplish.

4.  How will I know it’s time?
Eight of Spades

When I start feeling restless in my inaction, it will be time to finally use my skills and abilities to step forward and get moving on this.  Those steps can be small, just one small step in front of the other.

DECK USED:  WOMEN OF HISTORY PLAYING CARDS