Illusions of Failure

Today’s meditation was skipped.  I laid down and was planning on doing it but then all hell broke loose and I ended up distracted from doing it into doing other things.  So… yeah.  Tomorrow.

Heartspun Tarot and Thera-Pets Emotional Support Animal CardsToday’s draw is the Ten of Pentacles, which is a representation of accomplishment and stability in the area of one’s finances, resources, health, home, and manifestations. It’s about having surpassed satiation and comfort, and having moved on to “spreading the wealth” to make that stability not just one that is steady beneath your feet, but also the feet of others that stand with you.

I’ve had to do a lot of supply shopping for the business the last few days (and tomorrow), and this kind of heavy spending always makes me feel a bit vulnerable and irritable. It’s feels like having to pull packed and stable dirt out from under my feet in order to keep things running smoothly.

I know that in doing this, I then open the door for more prosperity and more progress, but that moment of instability in the spending still feels… vulnerable.    The Ten of Pentacles combined with today’s Thera-Pets card is a reminder that that feeling I experience during these times is an illusion.  It’s a sign of progress that I need to buy more supplies. It’s a good thing.


The Marching Into Darkness Tarot Challenge Prompt
: How have I allowed what I was taught about what’s acceptable in society to burden me?

Tarot de Marseille-Waite

Reading Summary: I have taken the structure of what my early home life presented to me (Four of Wands) to learn what not to do (Death), so that I could create something healthier and more accepting (Ace of Cups).

Take Away:  I haven’t.  The answer here is that I have not allowed what I’ve been taught are society’s expectations to burden me.  I don’t rule my life by society’s expectations, but rather by my own personal moral compass.  I know what is right and wrong for me, and I follow this to find a better path and a happier life than if I were to allow myself to be constrained and/or burdened by the expectations of others.

This is not to say that there have not been times in my past where I’ve found myself trying to mold myself into the expectations placed upon me by my father, but at this time in my life I have found ways to reach past those expectations and begin living for myself instead.


#DiscordTarotolicsMar2021 Challenge Prompt
: Draw or write something free form inspired by the card(s).

Heartspun TarotOne day Jude and Michael went to the mall to shop for a new girlfriend.As they walked down the corridors of the mall checking out all of the different girls, there were many who turned their heads to check them out along the way. (Two of Cups)

Looking at the girls, some were tall and others short, some were curvy and others lean, some beautiful and others more cute than breathtaking.  (Wheel of Fortune atop Two of Swords)

All day long they checked out the girls at the mall, but by the end of the day, neither had found one that they liked.  Then, as they were heading for the exit Jude pulled Michael up short and kissed him.

And neither of them ever looked at girls again. (Ten of Swords)


Daily Self Kindness

I got laid and was a greedy fucker and it was glorious.   I love you, Gideon.