tarot self care

Stay On Target

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Today’s meditation was just over fifteen minutes long and tacked into the tail end of my yoga and physio exercises.   I used the time to do some extra stretches with my hip as I’ve had a lot of stiffness there lately, but also to focus on breathing exercises.

Briefly, during the meditation, I had a really nice moment where the anxiety that’s been riding me the past week or two eased up a bit.   Like the knot relaxed, if just for a moment.

Eight of Wands - Tarot of the Hidden RealmToday’s draw is the Eight of Wands, which is generally a representation of movement, fast paced change, and alacrity as well as honed focus.

What I see in today’s card is an order to stay focused.   Today is your birthday, and I want to make sure I have time to spend with you so you can open your gifts, and so that we can hopefully get a bit of play in as well.   In order to do that, I need to stay focused and get my work done early so that I have that extra time to give.

DECK USED:  TAROT OF THE HIDDEN REALM

#TarotForGrowthFebruary Challenge Prompt
Question: What is my relationship with rest?

Hush Tarot

Reading Summary:  Reading based off intuitive hits from the imagery rather than traditional card meanings.  I know what I need to do (Ace of Pentacles), but I’m all tangled up (Five of Spears) because I’m too busy trying to get somewhere (Wheel of Fortune).

Take Away:  The dove has the key to what I need to do, she rests and offers that knowledge, but the snakes make it clear that I’m being blocked by an tangle of distraction as I try to move forward like the ant floating on the leaf.  Essentially, my goals and aspirations are constantly pushing me forward and blocking my ability to rest effectively.

DECK USED:  HUSH TAROT

#DiscordTarotholicsFeb2020 Challenge Prompt
Question: What is the best and worst thing about getting older?

Hide TarotBest thing about getting older : Finding security both in yourself and your situation. Although not everyone finds financial security later in life, what they do find is a stability and knowledge in who they are and where they’ve been.  This creates a foundation and sense of inner security that youth haven’t yet discovered as they haven’t yet fully explored themselves and their potential yet.

Worst thing about getting older : Looking back on the past and all those things you wish you’d done.  Getting older has a lot of regrets, and if not regrets?  Lost opportunities.  We all have them, and this card indicates one of the worst things about getting older is looking back on those lost opportunities and letting your mind meander down the “what ifs” of if you had just done this or that.

DECK USED:  HIDE TAROT

Owl and Bones February Two Card Challenge
Question: Brag / Be Humble

Tarot of the Lucid SlumberBrag : The unique shit that I’ve done in life that make it a life worth living.  Maybe because I started off on my own so much earlier than most of my generation, I’ve had a lot of experiences  along the way that are helpful in giving others hope for getting through their own struggles.   These experiences aren’t always pleasant, but they are still adventures of one sort or another… and have made me who I am.  Sharing them, and my triumph over them, helps me in helping others.

Be Humble :  The nefarious shit that I probably shouldn’t have done, but turned out okay regardless.  I have a very honed moral compass, and a very eclectically unique code of ethics… that said?  I was dumb and young once too, no matter how early I matured.  I did the wrong thing from time to time, I fucked up from time to time… I did things that I look back on and am sad about from time to time too.   These lapses in judgement are moments I need to keep to myself, regardless of how much they may have assisted me in my own growth and in becoming the man that I am now.

DECK USED:  TAROT OF THE LUCID SLUMBER

Breaks in the Storm

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IMG_2806Today’s meditation was just over ten minutes long, and focused upon the voices in our head and how they can turn against us at times when we need support the most.

The guided meditation walked through the process of looking at those internal voices not as whispers of truth or influences on how you should feel, but from an observer on the outside.

Everyone has these voices that whisper about insecurities, self-doubts, and pick at our weaknesses.   Today’s meditation encouraged looking at these voices as an observer so that you can judge for yourself whether what those voices are saying is useful or valid… or far more likely, just a bunch of judgemental hot air.

Spirit of Clouds - Majestic Earth TarotToday’s draw is the Spirit of Clouds (King of Swords) which is commonly a representation of a projective alpha energy, personality, or person in the areas of communication and intellect.  This often portrays itself in themes concerning authority, clear thinking, and intellectual strength.

The appearance of the Spirit of Clouds in today’s draw ties into the theme of today’s meditation.   When I look at the image on the card, what I see is the beaten and battered earth, the torrential rains, and stormy clouds above… and the clearing of the storm in the distance.

The message here is to look for the break in the storm.  I have had some time lately where I’ve seen those breaks.  Times when I’ve felt the shift of breeze and fresh air sift through my mind and spirit, allowing the weight of winter’s struggles and clouded sensations of feeling smothered to be brushed away for brief moments and allow me to feel refreshed and clean once more…. just like that break in the storm in the image.

This card is an encouragement to savor those moments, and reach for them.  Enjoy them and let them help lift me further out of the dim and the dark and into the light where my spark resides.

DECK USED:  MAJESTIC EARTH TAROT

#TarotForGrowthFebruary Challenge Prompt
Question: How can I improve my relationship with productivity?

Tarot in WonderlandReading Summary:   It’s time to start tapping back into my creativity (Knight of Cups)… now (Eight of Wands).

The deck did not want to give me any more cards after the Knight of Cups.  When it finally did, it gave me the Eight of Wands.  The Eight of Wands is sass, because the deck had already said all that it wanted to say.

Take Away:  If I want to improve my current relationship with productivity, it’s time to start acting on those small sparks of inspiration and creativity when they start to sneak in to whisper in my ear.   At the moment, these small sparks are very sparse and difficult to hear, but just like one’s intuition, the more you listen… the more it will speak up.

DECK USED:  TAROT IN WONDERLAND

#DiscordTarotholicsFeb2020 Challenge Prompt
Question: What one thing can I do today to make my life better?

Weird Cat Tarot

Reading Summary:  Let Gideon (King of Cups) and my loved ones (Three of Cups) lift me up and inspire hope (The Star).

Take Away:  All of the reads so far today are focusing upon those moments of “light at the end of the tunnel” and “fresh air breathed through the soul” feelings that I’ve been experiencing the last few days.  Whatever hole of fog that I’ve managed to fall into is beginning to allow me glimpses of the sky above and my guidance to climbing my way out is to allow others that care about me to inspire hope while I reach for the handholds that will allow me to climb free of the hole.

DECK USED:  WEIRD CAT TAROT

Owl and Bones February Two Card Challenge
Question: Absorb / Take Action

Love Is In The Earth TarotAbsorb : The Four of Crystal Spheres (Pentacles) is an indication that I need to take time to really sink into the feeling of safety, stability, and security instead of allowing myself to be carried away by worries and fears.

Take Action :  The Two of Crystal Spheres (Pentacles) as the “take action” card speaks finding balance.  Things have been out of whack for me for quite a while now, and in order to find that balance again, the cards indicate that I am going to need to actively reach for it.

DECK USED:  LOVE IS IN THE EARTH TAROT

 

Stability… and Shifting Focus

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Today’s meditation was ten minutes long, but I had a hard time focusing today because I was dealing with some banking issues that got in the way.   The meditation today was tacked on to the tail end of my yoga/physiotherapy, which was really needed.

I actually sort of feel as if I haven’t meditated today, even though I did, and I will do another session before bed tonight as well.

Four of Pentacles - Tarot of the Hidden RealmToday’s draw is the Four of Pentacles, which combined with the imagery in this card speaks to me of protection and stability.

Older generations always speak about how important it is to put money away and save for the future, and that is what I see here.   I see a preparation and protection of one’s future and the future of what is important to you.

Just recently I upped my contributions to my IRA (individual retirement account), as I am already paying the absolute max payment that I can per month on my mortgage.  I don’t want to blow all of my money, but want to make sure that I have cushions in place for when I need them, including a larger one for when I just can’t keep up with the pace I’ve set for myself over the past fifteen years.

I see the appearance of this card as confirmation that I’m making the right choices in this area for the time being, and encouragement that I’m heading in the right direction.

DECK USED:  TAROT OF THE HIDDEN REALM

#TarotForGrowthFebruary Challenge Prompt
Question: What is my relationship with productivity?

Regretsy Tarot

Reading Summary:  Even though I’m getting a good deal done (Four of WTF), I’m struggling with acknowledging my ingenuity and progress (3 of Tools) which is blocking me from moving forward and leaving behind the negativity of the last few months in exchange for new adventures (April’s Army).  Because of this, I’m feeling a disconnect with the joy in my creative process (The Owl and the Octopus).

Take Away: This is a topic we’ve touched on a couple of times lately (including today) in an effort to pull me back into finding my sense of balance after the mess from the letter and the fear it manifested in me.   I’ve been especially dismissive of my own skills and abilities lately, especially in relation to my creativity and my business.   I know this, I’m just struggling with moving past it.

DECK USED:  REGRETSY TAROT

#DiscordTarotholicsFeb2020 Challenge Prompt
Question: Who in my life needs extra attention at this time?

Lion's Gateway Tarot

Reading Summary: I need to keep an eye out for those in my life that are feeling a lack of focus (Knight of Swords) and hesitating to move forward (Hanged man).  When I spot them avoiding connecting with the path forward (Two of Wands) it will be important to step in and offer them a guiding light and a bit of hope (The Star).

Take Away:  These cards indicate that I need to stop focusing so hard on my own problems and pay more attention to those around me that may also be going through their own struggles.  I’ve had my own issues with self worth lately, but the cards suggest that if I want to dig myself out of my own hole?  I will be able to do that by helping those around me that are struggling in finding their own footing on their own paths.

DECK USED:  LION’S GATEWAY TAROT

Owl and Bones February Two Card Challenge
Question: Let it go / Care Bear Stare

Dishonored TarotLet It Go : Step away from unkind thoughts…

Care Bear Stare :  …and into the spirit of generosity.

Take Away:  This is a reiteration of the reading today from the Tarotholics prompt.  It speaks about moving away from being a dick to myself and using helping others to bolster my own spirit and inner strength.

DECK USED:  DISHONORED TAROT

 

The Way Forward

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IMG_2754Today’s meditation was just over eleven minutes long and focused on taking time to value yourself and your contributions those around you and yourself.

This is something I struggle with on a regular basis.  It’s not that I don’t acknowledge that I contribute.  I love helping people, teaching people, guiding people.  I love providing that little nugget of something that clicks for them and helps them along their path.   I love making beautiful things and sending them out into the world to improve the lives of others.

I contribute to the world around me in many, many different small ways that (I hope) flit out into the world like the butterflies of chaos theory, changing the world one tiny touch of positivity at a time.

BUT…. I have a hard time acknowledging my own worth.  And that reflects sometimes on how much worth and value I see in what I contribute to others and the world.  I’m aware of this, and I’m trying to be kinder to myself as I keep that in mind.

Majestic Earth TarotToday’s draw is a double without a jumper, which is to say that both cards came out together as one.  The cards in today’s draw are the Four of Water (Cups) and the Ace of Clouds (Swords).

What I see in today’s card(s) is a reiteration and reinforcement of yesterday’s read on the Tarotholics prompt.  That is to say, the cards are telling me that it’s time to put my apathy away.  Now is the time to breathe fresh air through my mind and heart, and step forward with purpose.

DECK USED:  MAJESTIC EARTH TAROT

#TarotForGrowthFebruary Challenge Prompt
Question: How can I improve my relationship with creativity?

Baba Studios Alice Tarot

Interpretation: Currently, my relationship with creativity is in the shithole, as was indicated by yesterday’s read for this challenge’s prompt.   The cards here are telling me that if I want to improve my relationship with creativity, I need to find steadier footing with my emotions (Queen of Cups). This is going to require taking in some new perspectives (Hanged Man) and the process of getting there is going to feel a bit like being on a tiltawhirl (Eight of Wands with the Wheel of Fortune).

DECK USED:  BABA STUDIO’S ALICE TAROT

#DiscordTarotholicsFeb2020 Challenge Prompt
Question: How can I better handle and/or respond to criticism?

Guided Hand Tarot

Reading Summary:  Look at all those cups.  Clearly I need to be more grounded in my emotions (Queen of Cups) when dealing with criticism and take the input as a jumping off point, both concerning the relationship of the one providing the criticism (Ace of Cups), and also for the learning experience it will give me so that I can move forward and do better (Page of Cups).

Take Away:  Sometimes we get stuck in a rut of our own making.  Criticism can often be the crowbar that pries us free of that rut.  It hurts, but if we can absorb the blow with grace, that criticism can provide new perspective and open you up to a new way of seeing and doing.

DECK USED:  THE GUIDED HAND TAROT

Owl and Bones February Two Card Challenge
Question: When to be a hermit? / When to be people-y?

Dixit Cards 10th Anniversary Expansion PackWhen to be a hermit? : Sometimes self reflection requires grounding and solitude.  Make sure that you are not doing the latter without the former.

When to be people-y? :  You can’t learn how to better associate and relate with other people unless you’re willing to step out and spend time with them. The first step is not shutting out those closest to you.

DECK USED:  DIXIT CARDS 10TH ANNIVERSARY EXPANSION PACK

Take Your Time

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Today’s meditation was supposed to be twenty minutes long, but I ended up dozing off in the middle of it and it turned into a nearly three hour nap instead.   I’ll give it another go before sleep tonight.  I’m pretty sure I got at least ten minutes in, but I can’t be positive.  A second practice before bed won’t hurt anything.

Four of Swords - Tarot of the Hidden RealmToday’s draw is the Four of Swords, which is about rest and recuperation.

What I see in this card is the value of taking time to sit and think.  Not just the value of rest and recuperation, but in allowing your mind to roam and restore.  The allowance to mull things over and let time slide by as you do so, rather than demanding the answers now and pushing forward, always forward.

I’m always pushing forward, but today I took some time for myself.  I relaxed and watched some tv.  I meditated, and napped a bit more than I’d planned.   I loused about and played games on my phone.   Most of these things are not things I allow myself all that often, or at least I don’t openly allow myself to accept them without recriminations.   Today, though, I gave myself these small pleasures and did my best to not put myself down for them or the time spent with them.

DECK USED:  TAROT OF THE HIDDEN REALM

#TarotForGrowthFebruary Challenge Prompt
Question: What is my current relationship with creativity?

Circle of Life Tarot

Reading Summary:  Stagnant (Hermit) due to a waffling on choices (Two of Swords) has left me feeling a bit apathetic and unable to see the good/joy of creativity (Five of Cups), which is swiftly (Eight of Wands) spiraling me down into feelings of scarcity (Five of Pentacles).

Take Away:  Usually, my creativity is very free flowing and constantly pushing through me like an inner light.   Since my issues with that letter came in, and the self doubt that letter and the fear it created sparked up in me, my creativity has been very much blocked, though.  It feels heavy and I’m struggling with it a bit, to be honest.

DECK USED:  CIRCLE OF LIFE TAROT

#DiscordTarotholicsFeb2020 Challenge Prompt
Question: What do I need to focus on for self-care for this new moon?

Dame Darcy's Queen Alice Tarot

Reading Summary: Now is the time to go for it (Knight of Wands) concerning those new ideas I have (Ace of Swords) about my financial portfolio and establishing more solid financial footing (King of Pentacles).

Take Away: There’s some taxes stuff I’ve been putting off and a few ideas I’ve had for directing money in a different direction, but I’ve been putting it off as it hasn’t felt like the right time.  From these cards, it sounds like now is the time and I should hop to it.

DECK USED:  DAME DARCY’S QUEEN ALICE TAROT

Owl and Bones February Two Card Challenge
Question: Wash Away / Invigorate

Prisma Visions Tarot v5Wash Away :  It’s time to wash away the energies of winter that have been dragging me down and holding me back.  These energies didn’t serve me then and are not serving me now, it’s time to allow a fresh clean breeze to blow through and clear them out.

Invigorate :  Invigorate the industrious energies of spring. It’s time to start moving forward instead of wallowing in stagnation.

DECK USED:  PRISMA VISIONS TAROT V5

 

Self Care Saturday (On a Sunday)

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These Saturday readings are (not usually) bearing in on any one thing or event in my life, as the question used is asking for a more general outlook. This is a self care exercise, and is not meant as a predictive reading… although that, too, happens on occasion.

The question is… What do I need to focus for self-care through the week ahead?

SCS

Earth – Temperance, Knight of Swords, Fox – Don’t get to cocky in bounding forward after my goals this week. Not all of the obstacles will be of my own making and I might need some cunning and careful planning to make things come out in my favor.

Air – The Tower, Page of Swords, Seed – Bright ideas will abound this week, but make sure you do your homework and spend the week preparing, rather than jumping on board right away, in order to ensure these ideas don’t fall apart before they can even get started.

Water – Two of Cups and Ship – You need to take this week to connect with and communicate with Gideon, and allow him to participate in finding balance for you.  It’s time to open up. Stop hiding.  You (and both, as well) can’t move forward until you do.

Fire – Ace of Cups and Bridge – Communication (as outlined in the previous cards in this spread) will assist in creating a reconciliation and foundation for new and better things to rise up in the weeks ahead.

Waning – Trust – You need to move away from a position of blind faith for the week ahead.  Things are not going to fix themselves, and nothing is going to get resolved unless you are willing to do more than remaining inactive and waiting. 

Waxing – The Three Poisons – You need to lean into self awareness this week.  Accept that you have faults and take steps to mitigate their effects on not just other’s lives but also your own. This does not mean being down on yourself and your faults and beating them into submission.  Instead, to defeat one’s faults requires killing them with kindness and understanding.

Take Away – Communication and allowing Gideon to dig is the theme of the week.  It’s time to excavate the issues still lingering and get them out into the open, whatever those issues may be.

DECKS USED: HIDE TAROT, RETRORACLE, BUDDHISH ORACLE