using tarot for guidance

New Moon in Libra – October 2020

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New Moon in Libra Spread - Halloween Deck

1. What is being called into realignment in my relationship with myself?

Ten of Clubs  – I am in the process of learning a new way of balancing my work, self care, and life in order to ensure that I am not overwhelming myself and overburdening myself into a burnout.  With orders picking up and the holiday rush only a couple weeks off now, I’m being tempted again and again by the old habits I’ve discarded that will allow that overwhelm to take hold.  I need to make sure that I’m taking care to stay true to my new purpose and new methods, and not allowing myself to dive into those old habits that will only lead to yet another return to premature burnout.

2. What is being called into realignment in my relationships with others?

Six of Hearts – Harmony with loved ones.  This is about making sure that I’m asking for help and not carrying everything myself.  In order to create harmony between myself and my sister (and Z), there needs to be a more even share of the work distributed between us.

3. Where do I need to surrender to allowing more support from others?

Queen of Spades – My habit of taking on the lion’s share of work for myself is not going to help me at all right now.  Yes, I have the experience, and I have the ambition.  I know where I’m headed and how to get there.  But that doesn’t mean I have to shoulder all the work.  I need to steer my ship more from the helm, and not quite so much from the decks.  You can still mingle and “harmonize”, but don’t take every little task on yourself.

4. Where do I need to surrender to allow more support from Spirit?

Queen of Clubs – My passion for my work is important to me, but in order to foster that passion I need to allow myself to let others in. Not just others that live and work with me, but the energies and entities around me that want to help support me through my struggles.

5. A card to support me in returning to and living from my heart-centre.

Two of Hearts -A reminder that I’m not alone.  This entire reading is that reminder, and it is fitting that it would conclude with the Two of Hearts. This new moon is definitely about the pace picking up in my work and the preparation for the holiday rush…. but in that it’s reminding me that I need to share the work load instead of taking it upon myself.  I need to remember that if I want to succeed at this new path of growth and balance, I can’t do everything myself and need to allow others to step in and carry some of the responsibility.

DECK USED: SWABBED DECKS’ HALLOWEEN DECK PLAYING CARDS

Letting Go of Apathy

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Today’s meditation was…. yes, yes.  It was skipped again. I’m playing catch up from taking a few days off and… well, it’s an excuse to be honest.  I just didn’t do it.   Tonight perhaps, or tomorrow is a new day.  But I didn’t fit it into my morning.

Madam Lydia Wilhelmina's Tarot - Five of CoinsToday’s draw is the Five of Coins, which is traditionally a representation of tests, trials, struggles, and hardships in the area of one’s finances, resources, health, home, or manifestations.

I definitely see the struggle and hardship in this card.  What I do not see that is often present in the standard Five of Coins (RWS, of course) is the representation of salvation… of help that is either being missed or ignored.  There are just children in tattered clothes and no shoes, clearly needy and alone.

The message here is about paying attention. If these children were adults on today’s city streets?  We wouldn’t even see them.  Hell, most probably wouldn’t even see them if they were children.  We’ve become so jaded and, in some cases, frustrated by the trials and tribulations of others that so many these days don’t even -see-  the poor and the homeless, the distressed or those in need.  They just aren’t there… even when they are standing right in front of you begging for their lives.

The message here is about paying attention, and making sure that your eyes and heart are open.  You can’t save the world, but sometimes even just a smile or a dime is enough to make someone’s life worth living another day.  Apathy kills the heart, let your heart breathe and grow by kicking apathy to the curb.

DECK USED:  MADAM LYDIA WILHELMINA’S TAROT

#DiscordTarotholicsOct2020 Challenge Prompt
Question: Write something free form inspired by the cards.

Ritual Abuse TarotNine of Pentacles – There was once a rich old man who lived in a house all alone. He was very rich, and very lonely. Each day he sat on his balcony at the end of another long day and watched the sun set.

One day, a bird landed on the railing of his balcony. He watched the bird, and the bird appeared to watch him.  They sat in silence together and watched the sun set that evening, and then the bird came back again the next day, and the next after that.

Over time, he began starting up a conversation with the bird.  He would tell the bird about his loneliness and discontent, and the bird would sit silently and listen.  They would then watch the sunset before the rustle of feathers would indicate the departure of the bird into the night.

One day, the bird came, but was acting strangely.  The bird would not settle and seemed to be having trouble with its balance.  The old man got up from his balcony chair to take a closer look, and discovered that the bird had somehow lost its eyes.  Where once there had been deep brown, watchful eyes, now there was nothing but empty sockets.

Seven of Cups – The man felt bad for the bird, and thought perhaps it would be best to put the bird out of its misery.  He carefully picked the bird up and brought it inside, intent on snapping its neck and burying it in the garden.   But, throughout the night, he found that he couldn’t do it.  He thought about keeping it as a pet, but this also felt wrong as the bird had always been wild.

Finally he was so mixed up in the choices before him that he couldn’t decide what to do.  In his distress, he asked the bird “What should I do??” and surprisingly, the bird answered him.

The bird told him that it wanted to make a trade.  That if the old man was wiling to give the bird one of his own eyes, then the bird would be able to see again and would be greatly rewarded for his sacrifice.  But, without eyes, the bird told him, that it would surely die either by flying into a tree or being prey to other forest creatures.

The man thought on this long and hard, considering what the bird had said, as well as what a good friend the bird had been to him for so long, coming each day to see the sunset.  If he gave up one of his eyes, he could still enjoy the sunset, and the bird would be able to as well.   It was a great sacrifice, but he didn’t want to go back to being so utterly alone.

In the end, he chose to sacrifice his eye to give the bird back its sight.  He remained still and silent as he allowed the bird to pluck out his eye and swallow it down.  His howls of pain were great, but when he settled and was able to take a breath once more, he opened his one good eye to find a beautiful woman before him. She had only one eye.. an eye the exact same shade as his own, and her smile was radiant.  Her raven like hair was beautiful,  like the wings of the bird that had been by his side each evening for so long, and  her touch as she tended to him gentle.

Nine of Cups – The beautiful woman patched him up and then helped to guide him out to the balcony once more, and together they sat to watch the sunset, the man’s heart finally at peace with his life and the company he keeps.

DECK USED:  RITUAL ABUSE TAROT

#MysticStarChallenge October Challenge Prompt
Question: How should I embrace my missed message?

Nicoletta Ciccoli Tarot

Reading Summary: Don’t close your eyes (Far Left Card) and ignore what’s happening (Center Left Card)… Keep your eyes open and aware (Center Right Card). It might be a little scary sometimes, but you need to be aware of what’s going on (Far Right Card).

Take Away:  This is about embracing messages from my spirit guides and acknowledging where they’re coming from… not specifically about the missed message from the other day.  It’s funny, because just before I pulled these cards I was thinking that we were beating that poor missed message to death, and then what comes up is not about that missed message at all but about paying attention.

And it’s true.  Some of the whole spirit guides stuff is a bit scary sometimes. But as the cards say, that doesn’t mean close my eyes and pretend it’s not happening.  It’s time to be open and aware instead of playing pretend that they’re not there, as I have in the past.

DECK USED:  NICOLETTA CICCOLI TAROT

#ConnectWithYourDeckChallenge by E Roebuck-Jones
Question: What do I need when I meditate?

Ghosts & Spirits Tarot

Reading Summary: A quiet place (Imagery in the Ten of Pentacles), with my intuition and inner knowledge (The High Priestess). And for everybody to just take a hike (Imagery in the Three of Wands Rx ) leave me alone for a bit (Imagery in the The Chariot).

This reading leaned deeply into the imagery of the cards and had very little to do with the actual card names.  I didn’t even realize the card names (or that they might fit the reading) until after I’d already taken down my summary notes.

Take Away:  Essentially, I need to be left alone so that I can meditate in peace, and to combine that peace and quiet that that time alone provides me with getting in touch with my deeper self and subconscious.  If I can’t sink into that deeper self, I can’t meditate because every little single noise or sensation will distract me again and again.

DECK USED:  GHOSTS & SPIRITS TAROT

Morning Bonus Read – Trick Or Treat Halloween Spread

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Because I am trying to show a bit more of my decks this month, as I have a whole LOT of October/Halloween/Samhain decks, I’m doing a few extra bonus reads over the month.  This is one of those extra readings.

Halloween Tarot Spread - Carnival at the End of the World Tarot

Card To Represent Something That Is Tricking Me
The Last Judgement and The Devil

These cards are a reminder that my values and self worth have absolutely nothing to do with my control (or the lack thereof) over my addictions. It’s like equating your self worth with the cleanliness of your home or the color of your shoes. They have nothing to do with each other, but sometimes we (as humans) get all these things mixed up in our head and emotions.

How I’m Being Fooled By This
Page of Cups

This tendency to equate one’s self worth with how we feel about a flaw or issue that we’re currently involved in is a sign of emotional immaturity. This isn’t a huge surprise, as I have spent a good portion of my life burying my emotions and muffling them behind thick walls.  Now that I’m opening up to them  more fully and willingly, little stumbling blocks like these are bound to crop up.

How Can I Gain a Clear Perspective and Stop Being Tricked?
The Sun

Allow yourself to have some fun.  You’re not hurting anyone,  not even yourself.  So there’s no harm in it. That in itself rouses a bit of guilt, although that has more to do with being raised that fun is a waste of time.  I know this is not to be the case, and The Sun card here in this spread indicates I need to remember to embrace my fun rather than allowing the past to influence me into shying away from it.

Card To Represent a Treat In My Life
Queen of Cups

Being able to better connect with and understand people on an emotional level than I have in the past.  I’ve noticed this a few times recently in speaking with others and how I relate to them.   What I used to see as my empathy for others I have now come to realize was far more logic based thane emotion based.

A Way That I Can Fully Embrace This Treat
Knave of Wands

Continue to make the exploration of emotional growth a priority and pour my interest and attention into it.  This might be difficult during the holiday rush that is quickly approaching.  But, ten weeks from now, that chaotic time will come to an end, and I’ll be able to delve back into that exploration with both feet.

Something I Don’t Yet Understand About This Treat
Six of Coins

It’s going to change how I relate to others that are more fortunate than myself, and others that are fare less fortunate than myself.  It’ll give me a new perspective on balance, and on my personal involvement with that balance.   I’m not there yet, but just as I understand empathy more now than I did before, so too will this come into focus as tome goes on.

DECK USED:  CARNIVAL AT THE END OF THE WORLD TAROT

Making Yourself The Outsider

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Today’s meditation was skipped again today. I probably shouldn’t have, but I had so much crap to get done, plus a phone appointment with my shrink… and everything just got away with me a bit.  So.. it didn’t get done.  I do plan on giving it a go when I lie down to go to bed tho.

Tarot of Haunted House - Four of WandsToday’s draw is the Four of Wands, which is traditionally a representation of homecomings and celebration…. and celebratory homecomings.  There is a stability to this theme, and comfort as well.

There aren’t many cards in this deck I feel this way about, but I’m not really sure about the imagery for this card in this deck.  What I see here feels a lot more like a Hierophant card than the Four of Wands.  

That said, what really stands out to me in this card today is the four pillars and the burst of flame atop each of them.  That imagery of stability and celebration then draws my eye down to the knife held in a sacrificial downward angle, which then draws my eye down to the two figures that appear to have turned to look back at the viewer.

These three points feel like levels in this card, and what I see here is more about -not- feeling welcome.  It’s about feeling like an outsider. An outlier.  You can see the stability and the celebration in the distance, but there are forbidding obstacles between where you now stand and that comfort hinted at in the four pillars. 

The message here is to not allow issues with self worth or confidence cut you out of the places where you should belong.  These negative feelings and derogatory self-narratives that make you feel like an outsider?  They aren’t what others are thinking.  They are only what you are thinking.  Don’t project your self-worth issues on others and assume that they perceive you as you see yourself.

DECK USED:  TAROT OF HAUNTED HOUSE

LionHart’s #TheOctoberTarot #SeasonOfTheWitchChallenge Prompt
Question: It’s just a bunch of hocus pocus, this card today will be my focus.

Grim Tarock - Five of CitadelsThe collection of buildings along the cliff’s face are piled atop each other and disintegrating under the wear of time.  Rocks tumble  and foundations crumble.

The Five of Citadels is a reminder about upkeep.

When you do a little each day to care for the upkeep of those things that are important to you, over time these things wear well and remain in good condition, creating a long future.

If, on the other hand, you do not do that little bit of care each day, over time things deteriorate a little at a time.  And soon, you find that those things you care about have fallen apart and no longer hold value.

The focus that this card prompts for me today is to make sure I’m doing the little work.  One small thing a day is enough to help keep things from falling apart… whether that’s self care, or home care, or relationships…. or anything of value.

DECK USED:  GRIM TAROCK

#DiscordTarotholicsOct2020 Challenge Prompt
Philosophical Question: Where do you find meaning in your life?

Hephoe TapoQueen of Wands atop The Hierophant – Through my passion for teaching and guiding others. I have found, especially as I’ve gotten older, that I greatly enjoy guiding others to help them in finding their own unique path, and teaching them in different skills and knowledge that I’ve collected along the way in my own life.  I want to help others in finding their own passions, their own interests, and their own beliefs.  I love occasionally hearing when something I’ve offered up “clicks” for someone and helps them in their own journey, or just knowing that I’ve helped in some way in making their life “fit” them better in some way.

The Emperor – Having a sense of independence and control.  These are things I need in my life. I require them.  And, in fact, it is a need that I have built a good deal of my life around, from how I am employed to how my relationships with others work, and even in how I relate to people and the world around me. 

Knight of Swords atop Ten of Pentacles – Going after my ambitions towards stability, security, and a comfortable living.  I feel that this answer is as much about the “going after” as it is about the obtaining of this goal. While I feel a need for stability and structure?  I also feel that need to strive for something, to push for something.  This stability and security is a sort of “moving target” that constantly stimulates that need to strive for something… and at the same time manage to accomplish just enough to fulfill that constant need for security.

DECK USED:  HEPHOE TAPO

#MysticStarChallenge October Challenge Prompt
Question: What is the significance behind this missed message from yesterday?

Dark Grimoire Tarot

Reading Summary: Lean on others (Three of Pentacles) instead of killing yourself trying to juggle everything on your own (Two of Pentacles). Depending on others is a choice that you have to consciously make for yourself (The Lovers)… and it will make your life better and more emotionally fulfilling in the end (Nine of Cups).

Take Away:  What these cards are saying is that I need to fill my life with people that love me and want to help.  By doing this, as time goes on, I will find the benefits spill over from my work and into my life at large and that even if I one day grown into a lonely old man alone in the world, I will feel emotionally fulfilled by all those past people that were a part of my life. The key here is that this is a choice.  A choice you make for yourself.  Letting people in is a choice that you have to start early and allow to then carry forward through the years ahead.

DECK USED:  DARK GRIMOIRE TAROT

Strength and Tenderness

/ Twist the Leaf / 1 Comment

Today’s meditation was again curtailed due to the need for sleep. I didn’t mean to doze off, but I’ve just been so tired these last couple of days and the moment I settled in and relaxed? Suddenly I was out like a light.

Madam Lydia Wilhelmina's Tarot - King of CupsToday’s draw is the King of Cups, which is traditionally a representation of a projective alpha energy, personality, or person in the area of one’s emotions, relationships, creativity, and intuition.

I don’t know what it is about this card, but there’s something so… sexy here.   I’m not sure what.  Maybe it’s the shoulder.  Or the hip.  Or the fact that the hand appears to be holding that scrap of tartan in place.  Whatever.  It’s hot.   And thus…. my brain goes to Gideon, because Gideon is hot… and is my King of Cups.

The thing that draws my gaze the most (along with the whole hotness factor) is the drape of tiny pearls. They hang from his hat, drape his body, as well as his right hand.

What I see here is a contrast between strength and fragility, power and delicacy.  It displays a balance.  The same sort of balance that Gideon shows me every day.  The balance I crave… especially when I am feeling vulnerable.

DECK USED:  MADAM LYDIA WILHELMINA’S TAROT

LionHart’s #TheOctoberTarot #SeasonOfTheWitchChallenge Prompt
Question: Itch-it-a-kup-it-a, mel-a-ka-mys-ti-ka, a poison {1}, the potion {2}, the magick {3}, my witchy calling {4}.

Luis Royo's Dark Tarot

A Poison – The High Priestess Rx – Not listening to your intuition has the ability to poison both your actions, your motivations, and your confidence. It’s important to be able to trust yourself, and when you second guess your intuition, it breaks down that trust.

The Potion – The Wheel – Whether things are on the way up or on the way down, it is through the times that your intuition speaks to you that you learn to trust it in the first place.  This takes repetitive practice.

The Magick – Queen of Pentacles – Only through experience can we develop that trust.  It takes time and nurturing to make it happen, and it takes even more time and nurturing to help it flourish.

My Calling – The Lovers – Some people ignore their intuition, and thus it rarely speaks.  Others accept their intuition and allow it to become a part of their lives.  It is my calling to have this type of close relationship with my intuition, and to choose it’s voice over that of logic or reason again and again so that with each trusting step forward it grows healthier and stronger.

DECK USED:  LUIS ROYO’S DARK TAROT

#DiscordTarotholicsOct2020 Challenge Prompt
Question: You / Your Current Path / Potential Outcome

Gothic Horror TarotYou – Death – I am going through an adjustment at this time in my life. Not just the gradual growth and adjustment that came with the emotional growth I’ve been focused on in the past year… but also the adjustment that comes from shifting out of the more relaxed part of my year into the chaos of the holiday rush.  For me, autumn is all about adjustments and changes, shifting gears and transitioning. 

Your Current Path – King of Staves – I am on the trajectory of diving into my holiday rush. Control and motivation need to be high, not just for myself but to lead those that work with me this year into the fray and give them the inspiration to keep going when things are at their peak.

Potential Outcome – Four of Swords – Exhaustion and a need for recovery.  Ten weeks from now, I am going to be at the end of my rope.  My eyes will feel like sandpaper, my body will feel as if I’m wasting away, and my mind will be a fuzzy blur as the adrenaline of the holiday rush begins to fade. Ten weeks from now I will reach the end of the chaos of the holiday rush… and it will be time to take a very much needed restorative break.

DECK USED:  GOTHIC HORROR TAROT

#MysticStarChallenge October Challenge Prompt
Question: What message has my Spirit Guide been trying to send me that I have not heard?

Terrestrial Tarot

Reading Summary:  Be proactive (Knight of Swords) about making sure you’re getting enough rest (Four of Swords).  Soon enough you’ll be up to your eyeballs in ambition and creativity (Queen of Wands) and dealing with being overwhelmed by the fray of the holiday rush (Five of Wands).

Take Away:  These last couple weeks are the last bit of rest and relaxation I’m going to get for a wile.  I need to make sure I get what I can while I can and not allow myself to fall into the “oh fuck oh fuck” panic of what’s to come.  I’ve done the holiday rush before, and I’ll do it again. Don’t freak out and lose what chance for rest and restoration that I have left.

DECK USED:  TERRESTRIAL TAROT

#ConnectWithYourDeckChallenge by E Roebuck-Jones
Question: How important is my health in my spiritual life?

Nightmare Before Christmas Tarot

Reading Summary:  Think of it this way (King of Needles imagery)… Your loved ones (Three of Potions) are there to make you take care of yourself so that you can get the most out of life (Nine of Presents).  If you don’t take care of yourself? No forward motion will be forthcoming (Three of Candles Rx).

Take Away:  Just sayin’?  But the way that King of Needles showed up was so funny.   It’s literally telling me that I need to really take some time to sit and think about this message.   The message being, of course, that my health is extremely important to my spiritual life.  No health means no progress upon my path.  Those that love me are here to help and make sure that I stay healthy, but their presence in my life is also an integral part of what makes me healthy as well.

DECK USED:  NIGHTMARE BEFORE CHRISTMAS TAROT

Morning Bonus Read – Samhain Tarot Spread

/ Twist the Leaf / 1 Comment

Because I am trying to show a bit more of my decks this month, as I have a whole LOT of October/Halloween/Samhain decks, I’m doing a few extra bonus reads over the month.  This is one of those extra readings.

Samhain Tarot Spread - Trick or Treat Playing Cards

Life: What is my soul purpose in this life?
Eight of Diamonds

My soul’s purpose in this life is to learn and grow.  It’s about taking lessons learned in my past incarnations and honing my understanding of them, and of myself. This incarnation of my soul is about developing skills.  I don’t think this is so much about the “developing skills” of the earthly plane, though, but more about developing my skills of manifestation and perhaps skills involved with learning how to continue to move on no matter the hurdles trying to hold me back.

Death: How do I honor and learn from the dead and past?
Queen of Hearts

It is important to instill empathy and understanding into the honoring of the dead and the past.   We cannot know the nuances of what has created these past situations or caused those that have passed to do the things they did in life.  It is with understanding and empathy, that we can direct love to those situations and people no matter their mistakes or issues that you may not agree with.

Veil: What message does the other side have for me right now?
Four of Hearts

Don’t be a sour sack.  Right so…. the thing is?  I’ve had a few rough days this week.  There was the day that took 3x the time to do just about everything (including things as small as screwing a cap on a bottle).  Then the day where everything I touched ended up tipped over or upended (including my chili bowl ending up upended on the couch).   And lets not forget the day that damned near everything I touched ended up on the floor (including a pan full of boiling water and a good half of each deck of tarot cards I picked up).

It kind of begins really difficult to not become a sulky sourpuss after a streak like that… but I’m trying.

Trick: What distracts me from my soul purpose?
Jack of Diamonds atop Two of Clubs

Sometimes a slow pace is a good thing, but sometimes?  That same slow pace causes a lack of direction.  It’s like when you have a million thoughts in your head and you say “I’ll remember them and write them down later” instead of doing it right away.  Half the good ideas never get written down no matter how good your intentions.

It’s the same with my soul’s purpose.  Sometimes, when the pace is slow, I get drawn off and lose direction, then have to find my way back again.

Treat: How does my soul purpose give me joy?
Jack of Spades atop Four of Clubs

Part of that journey my soul is going through involves all those digressions that lead me astray along the way.  Part of my soul’s journey is learning to return to the path forward when I get distracted. And each time I return to my path after having gotten distracted it is like returning home once again, and the puzzle pieces fit back into place.  I can feel it happen when these times are upon me, and there is a great deal of pleasure and joy in those moments.

DECK USED:  TRICK OR TREAT PLAYING CARDS