tarot self care

Tuning In

/ Twist the Leaf / 1 Comment

Today’s meditation was ten minutes long and was focused primarily on breathing in cleansing energy, and breathing out pain as I stretched and worked on a few stiff spots in my mobility.  This type of meditation can be extremely relaxing when muscles and pain levels cooperate, but today was not one of those cooperative days.  I did manage to get a little more range of motion going, though, so it wasn’t a total loss.

Cosmos Tarot and OracleToday’s draw is is the Ten of Water (Ten of Cups) which is traditionally a representation of fulfillment and completion in the areas of one’s emotions, relationships, and intuitive gifts.

There were a couple of different things that stuck out to me in the imagery of this card today, the first of which was one of the key words at the bottom of the card.  Although I absolutely see the sense in “marriage” as an interpretation of the Ten of Cups, I’ve personally never had marriage come up in relation to this card and it took me a moment’s pause to consider and… eventually, agree.

Also in the imagery of this card it was that the woman here has her eyes closed.   This speaks to me of turning inward, and in doing so, becoming more aware of the emotions you are feeling in the moment.   The slight curve on her lips indicates that she feels both peaceful and positive in this moment captured on the card.

The message in today’s card is to take time and acknowledge your emotions, and savor the good and positive pieces of your life that lift those positive emotions to the surface.

DECK USED:  COSMOS TAROT AND ORACLE

#TarotForGrowthJuly Challenge Prompt
Topic: I’m struggling with self-worth.
Question:  How can I learn to measure my worth exclusively in comparison to my past self?

Tarotbot Tarot

Reading Summary: Don’t close yourself off and hunker down, becoming so focused on stability and security (Four of Coins) that you forget to look around. Opportunities lie in opening your eyes (Two of Swords). Instead make the choice to stay aware and to roll with the punches (The Wheel).

Take Away:  In order to measure my worth exclusively in comparison to my past instead of on my present or future contributional abilities, I need to remember all of the times in the past when life has knocked me on my ass and how I have managed to get up again and again regardless of what has been thrown at me along the way.

DECK USED:  TAROTBOT TAROT

#DiscordTarotholicsJul2020 Challenge Prompt
Topic:  Write something free form inspired by the cards.

Aquarian TarotKnight of Cups – Andrew’s worth had always been measured in his ability to get on well with his comrades and strangers alike. He was known to be a boisterous man filled with stories that made others laugh and a lover that captured the hearts of many women.

Strength – One day Andrew met a woman that he could not sway so easily as all the others.  This intrigued him and drew him to her again and again like a moth to the flame.  And with each visit to her bed he became more enamored with her, admiring her wiles and her wisdom.

Death – Through these many visits she opened Andrew up to a whole new world, and soon he had eyes for no one but her.  Frivolous trysts and clandestine encounters no longer appealed, as it was the strength of Cassandra’s mind he admired most of all and he found that none other could shine as bright as she.

His life forever changed, he committed himself to her and they lived long lives together, challenging each other to grow, their fates entwined like the roots of an oak tree.

DECK USED:  AQUARIAN TAROT

#ConnectWithYourDeckChallenge by E Roebuck-Jones
Question:  When am I most creative?

New Palladini Tarot

Reading Summary: When I am regulating (Temperance) my responsibilities properly (Two of Pentacles) and leaving room for endeavors away from my obligations (King of Cups).

Take Away:  I am most creative when I allow myself some time and space to do things that have nothing to do with my obligations and responsibilities.  Exploring creativity in this free environment, without the pressures of money or business or obligation to weigh down the process, allows my creativity to truly be set free.

DECK USED:  NEW PALLADINI TAROT

Healing is a Process

/ Twist the Leaf / 1 Comment

Today’s meditation was ten minutes long and took place out on the balcony.  I needed some fresh air and distance, so I closed myself out there and laid out along the plants and pots to chill for a bit.  I took a lazy amount of time out there, even after the breathing exercises I rolled over to spend some time chilling with the overflowing of thyme I have out there this year, picking buds and cleaning things up.

Herbcrafter's Tarot - Three of AirToday’s draw is the Three of Air (Three of Wands) which is traditionally interpreted as representing themes of heartbreak, disappointment, emotional pain, and depression. These “emotions” do not live in the heart, but within the mind, and this is why although the card appears to be about the emotions, it resides within the Swords suit which is the suit of the mind.

In this card, my eyes are irresistibly drawn to the Echinacea flowers reaching for the sky today, as well as the hint of a rusted roof in the distance of the background.  Echinacea is an immune system booster, and is used in spellcraft as a plant that lends an energy boost to your intent as well as an herb used to promote inner strength. This makes the presence of the plant represented on the Three of Swords card especially relevant, as it transforms the card from a representation of desolation and despair to one of growth and support during difficult times.

The roof holds its own meaning to me when I see it in the imagery of this card today. It speaks to me of a long stretch of time. It takes time to weather a corrugated roof and create those streaks of rust and weathering you see in that small peek you see in the lower left corner of the card. Blended with the Echinacea, it speaks of the fact that sometimes it takes time to heal from disappointments and heartache.  Not everything can be immediate.

This message today is in reference to my journey of healing from “the letter”. It’s been months and months since the letter first arrived, and over six months now since I started confronting the fear and fog that swallowed me whole in response to that letter. It feels like this climb out of that place of fear and desolating doubt.  Today’s card is a message of encouragement and patience. A reminder that true healing takes time, and that’s okay.

DECK USED:  HERBCRAFTER’S TAROT

#TarotForGrowthJuly Challenge Prompt
Topic: I’m struggling with self-worth.
Question:  What three qualities do I associate with what it means to be “a good person”?

Lumina Tarot

Reading Summary: The ability to stay on the straight and narrow despite the shit that tries to tear you down.

I can’t quite break this one down as neatly as I usually do to display how I came to the bare bones of the reading.   What I see here is that the Three of Swords is the topic.  It is what “happens to you” and the basis of this reading.   The King then represents the strength to “stay the course” and the Eight of Wands reinforces single minded purpose  towards the direction I wish to go in seen in the Two of Wands.

Usually when I break apart my reading to display how I get there, I’m able to break it into pieces that fit together into a succinct sentence.  Something about how the Lumina Tarot communicates makes this process a lot more difficult.  I’m not sure why.

Take Away:  So in breaking this down, three of the qualities I associate with being a good person include the strength of will to “stay the course” of one’s beliefs and standards through through times of struggle and heartache, the ability to perceive the direction you want to go in through these times, and the determination to stay on that course.  This is about one’s moral compass and life goals, and about not allowing negativity to steer you away from those values.

DECK USED:  LUMINA TAROT

#DiscordTarotholicsJul2020 Challenge Prompt
Topic:  Banish This / Attract This

Minchiate Etruria Anima Antiqua TarotBanish This – Taurus –  It’s time to let go of your bullheaded stubbornness and rigidity. There is a great deal of inflexibility in you and in order for the growth you want to happen to flourish and really take off, you need to find a way to let go of some of that rigidity.

Attract This – The Grand Duke – Androgyny and a hint of mastery yet to come. The message here is about adaptability, versatility, and growth.  I need to invite these qualities in and allow them to ease the rigidity that is holding me back.  It is possible to hold on to who you are and your moral compass, even as you move through the changes taking place and grow into a better person.

DECK USED:  MINCHIATE ETRURIA ANIMA ANTIQUA TAROT

#OwlandBonesJuly Challenge by Owl and Bones Tarot
Topic:  let in // let out // let go // let rest

Albano Waite Tarot

King of Cups – Let in Gideon, for he is your support and knows you better than all others (except perhaps L). Sometimes, especially when I’m dealing with subdrop, it can be hard to open up.  Feeling so vulnerable makes being so open especially a struggle, but that is what he is there for, to block out the danger so that he and he alone has access to those tender moments and inner knots, and can help me through.

The Empress – Let out into the world my ability to nurture and encourage others. Remember that the creations you make and send out in to the world have power to influence others in positive, nurturing ways. They foster positivity and spread joy, bringing this warmth and energy into the lives of others, sometimes when they need it most, but always with the ability to then spread out from that person to the next and the next.

The Sun – Let go and allow the sun to shine. Don’t allow pessimism to win out. You’ve made he conscious choice to try and move in a more positive direction, to foster positivity and joy in your life. In order for this to happen, you have to allow it.

Ace of Swords – Let rest my harsher nature. That inner critic and the inner dialog that goes on with myself is not healthy.  Pushing it away is not the only path to easing up on this.  Letting it rest is another method worth exploring.

DECK USED:  ALBANO WAITE TAROT

#ConnectWithYourDeckChallenge by E Roebuck-Jones
Question: How can I capture my best ideas?

Wheel of the Year Tarot

Reading Summary: Take time to examine them from all angles (The Hanged Man), pick them apart and judge them harshly (Queen of Swords) in order to challenge their worth (Five of Wands).

Take Away:  This is more about how to sort out the best ideas from the not as great ones. It’s one of those times where that shrewd judgement and harsh sight comes in handy as it allows me to pick apart an idea down to its bare bones and look at all the drawbacks and other pitfalls it might have.   If it can make it through that process and come out the other side, it is truly worthy of exploring further.

DECK USED:  WHEEL OF THE YEAR TAROT

Morning Bonus Read – Responsibilities

/ Twist the Leaf / 1 Comment

The prompt for this reading came from one of my Discord servers and is as follows:
“In these uncertain times, let’s look at a few positives this week with the help of our divination tools. What good thing has not changed in the world this year? What do you have to look forward to? What can you do right now to move yourself toward a good future? And what can you do right now to move the world toward a better future?”

Permaculture Playing Cards

What good thing has not changed in the world this year?

Five of Spades – We have not been beaten into submission.  Instead society continues to fight.  Perhaps sometimes their fight is misdirected, but that spark is still there and burning bright. We continue to stand tall, even as 2020 tries to break us all.

What do I have to look forward to?

Six of Clubs – Vitality within my ambitions and drive. My endeavors will continue to thrive and go well, as long as I am willing to put my interest into them and apply my creative drive to keeping them going.

What can I do right now to move myself toward a good future?

Jack of Spades – Apply yourself to finding better ways to communicate with others and express yourself and your ideas clearly. Make a list of your interests and ideas so that you can explore them at your leisure instead of either rushing through with the concern you will forget about them before you learn what you want to learn.

What can I do right now to move the world toward a better future?

Two of Spades – Make good choices. Every positive thing you do and good choice you make trickles outward into the world much in the same way your creations bring positivity to others and that positivity spreads out from them.  Sometimes more can be accomplished through a million small good choices than one grand gesture.

DECK USED: PERMACULTURE PLAYING CARDS

Familiar Comforts

/ Twist the Leaf / 2 Comments

Today’s meditation was ten minutes long and I admit that I was a little distracted because I was eager to get out and go hiking. I did a second meditation in the woods lying naked on the forest floor in the mountains before going above the treeline, and that was much more relaxing. Although I didn’t time it, I would estimate the meditation probably lasted about half an hour… maybe a bit longer.

Cosmos Tarot and OracleToday’s draw is the Ten of Air (Ten of Swords) which is traditionally read as “the end of the line” of the tragedies of the Swords suit and is a culmination of the suit’s struggles.  It indicates themes that have to do with defeat, betrayal, and wounds that cut deep.

What stood out strongest to me in the imagery of this card today is the defeated slump of Medusa’s posture, but even more so… the snake that is closest to her face which then brings my attention to the others in the light… and from there the others yet still hidden in the shadows. In noticing this I feel that they must offer some sort of comfort.  They have been with her all this time and are surely, even as they are a part of her, also a comfort to her that they are there in this moment.

The message in today’s card is about not allowing times when you feel defeated by wounds (internal or external) that have cut you down also isolate you. Take comfort in others, seek out those that love you and care about you, find those that will sit and make space for you to just be… you.   Don’t look to them to solve anything, but take comfort in their presence and the fact that they are there.   You are not alone.

With my subdrop sure to be just around the corner, today’s card is a reminder that when I am feeling out of sorts from the drop, you are there for me to help me through.  Just your presence makes things better and eases that ache inside my soul.  I need to not hold myself apart and strive instead to move in closer and let you soothe the drop and untangle those inner knots that the drop creates.

DECK USED:  COSMOS TAROT AND ORACLE

#TarotForGrowthJuly Challenge Prompt
Topic: I’m struggling with self-worth.
Question:  How can I be more mindful about challenging and correcting negative self-talk?

Way of the Panda Tarot

Reading Summary: Remember to look at things from another angle (Judgement) and pay attention to the fact that you really have done a lot (Ten of Pentacles) and you’re a hard worker with great deal of hard earned skill (Eight of Pentacles).

Take Away: Instead of allowing my inner narrative to have free reign, pay attention to what you hear with your ears and take that to heart. You’ve spent your life refusing to allow people’s perceptions of you matter, but those same perceptions can boost you up and create a positive narrative to help you in counteracting the negative inner dialogue you deal with on a constant basis.

Remember as well that you have created a comfortable life not just for yourself, but for L as well.  You share your stability and comfort with others, and are more than capable of sustaining it going forward.  The skills you have worked so hard to master, and have used to create this stability  in your life, are not going to just disappear.

DECK USED:  WAY OF THE PANDA TAROT

#DiscordTarotholicsJul2020 Challenge Prompt
Question:  How can I feel more grounded on my life’s current path?

Evolution TarotReading Summary: Make sure you are getting the alone time that you need (The Hermit) and use that time to forge a new path for your inner dialogue (Knight of Swords). Keep in mind that positivity and optimism (The Star) is not a natural state for you and takes repetition and diligence (Knight of Swords again).

There is a theme of darkness and purple through each of these three cards that does not carry through the entire deck.  This speaks to me of not just solitude, but peaceful solitude.  This is why I indicate that the cards say that I need to use the alone time for distancing from my normal inner critic’s dialogue.

Take Away:  Peaceful alone time and continued work on the optimism perspective will combine to give me an increased feeling of grounding in my life at this time. Neglecting my alone time now that I have the opportunity to get it (even if not in the same ways I could before) is detrimental and I need to make sure I’m fitting that in.

DECK USED:  EVOLUTION TAROT

#OwlandBonesJuly Challenge by Owl and Bones Tarot
Question:  pencil // pen  // permanent marker // tattoo

Slavic Tarot

Recipe For A Good Life

Pencil in the hardships.
Add strength and purpose in pen.
Write in nurturing balance in permanent marker.
And tattoo motivation and drive into your soul.

DECK USED:  SLAVIC TAROT

#ConnectWithYourDeckChallenge by E Roebuck-Jones
Question:  How can I think more creatively?

Karma Tarot

Reading Summary: Don’t allow (Seven of Wands) your addictions (The Devil) to get in the way of your motivation (Eight of Wands).

Take Away:  Having an addictive personality is a bitch.  Just sayin’.   But it’s really hard sometimes to force yourself away from the stuff that feels good and you want more of.  Whether that’s certain foods, or sleep, or whatever…  So many things seem so innocuous but can become a mess of addiction and patterns that need to be broken so easily… so very easily.

The cards here indicate that it’s by staying on top of that addictive personality trait and making sure it’s kept in hand that allows my creativity free reign to flourish and grow.

DECK USED:  KARMA TAROT

Youthful Exuberance

/ Twist the Leaf / 1 Comment

Today’s meditation was ten minutes long, and I dozed off somewhere at the end of it, although I don’t think for very long. I was just feeling super relaxed and my allergies made my eyes feel good when closed… that combination sort of snuck up on me a bit with the nap.

Herbcrafter's TarotToday’s draw is the Hija of Fire (Page of Wands) card, which is traditionally interpreted as a receptive omega energy, personality, or person in the area of one’s drive, passions, interests, and inner spark.

What stands out to me the strongest in the imagery of this card today is the stuffed tiger up in the corner, and the amber sphere. The tiger speaks to me of youthful innocence and comfort. Even now in my 30’s I still can hug a stuffed animal up to my chest under my chin and find comfort in the soft fuzziness and squish in my arms.

Amber, on the other hand, is a healing stone. Not in that it heals, but in that it draws out negative energy, which then stimulates the body, mind, spirit into healing itself. Combined with the stuffed tiger, it reinforces that sense of innocence. The energy of the amber pulling out the negativity in the scene, sponging away pessimism, to leave behind youthful exuberance and innocent creativity.

The message in today’s card is a reminder to enjoy yourself. Exploration and creativity should be a fun process, not a chore. Do the things that interest you and let them carry you away into that place of positive energy and eager excitement.

DECK USED: HERBCRAFTER’S TAROT

#TarotForGrowthJuly Challenge Prompt
Topic: I’m struggling with self-worth.
Question: How can I reframe self-worth as something I possess intrinsically, rather than something I need to earn?

Wild Unknown Tarot

Reading Summary: Make a choice (The Lovers) to move away from uncertainty and self doubt (The Moon Rx) and accept that your sense of fulfillment comes from within (Ten of Pentacles).

The imagery for the Ten of Pentacles in this deck looks like a tree’s rings to me. The pentacles are clustered at the center, speaking of the value being within the core of the trunk from the beginning and remaining as a part of the inner make up rather than from anything external. The motion of the geese in the Lovers card reinforces the “moving away from” aspect of the reversed Moon.

Take Away: What keeps me from framing self worth as something intrinsic within me is my self doubt. If I can make the choices that move me away from that self doubt, I will find it easier and easier to see the worth of those “inner rings of growth” within me and their weight and strength will more easily shine brighter within my eyes.

DECK USED: WILD UNKNOWN TAROT

#DiscordTarotholicsJul2020 Challenge Prompt
Topic: Do Spread #2
Should I make this few days off break a monthly thing (other than during the holiday rush)?

Star Seeker's TarotReading Summary: Times of stillness create new perspective (The Hanged One) which create a sense of clarity to assist me in the choices I make (The Lovers). Opening up the door to a whole new world (The World).

The color coordination between the water in the first and the sky in the second connects these two cards into a flow of energy, connecting the perspective gained in the first card into the clarity of the sky in the second. The third card is completely different in color scheme and appearance, reinforcing the “whole new world” aspect.

Take Away: Yes. Do it. It will help you view your work and your life through a different lens, and in turn give you a more positive outlook both concerning your work, as well as concerning your free time. As you are stepping forward in trying to restructure your organization of your responsibilities and into your emotional growth, this change could assist in fostering both of these things.

DECK USED: STAR SEEKER TAROT

#OwlandBonesJuly Challenge by Owl and Bones Tarot
Question: Mercury goes direct: release // return // retry

Psychopomp Tarot

Release – Ten of Wands – It’s time to release the last remnants of that sense of betrayal that came with the arrival of “the letter” last fall/winter. The dregs of that pain has continued to be a block to my creative flow.

Return – The Magician – In releasing the pain mentioned above, I can then return to the confident creative man I’ve always been without the restraint of fear and pain holding me back. My skills and abilities can then shine bright and I will be able to apply them to my endeavors freely and without restraint.

Retry – The Sun – Finding joy in my work. This is something that has been a progression since the mess that “the letter” created. In stages I have tried and stalled out, then tried again. I will continue to work at instilling more joy into my work and appreciating my craftsmanship as well as the pleasure I take in sending my work out into the world to bring joy to others as well. I will continue to try and try again.

DECK USED: PSYCHOPOMP TAROT

 

Self Care Saturday (On a Sunday)

/ Twist the Leaf / 1 Comment

These Saturday readings are (not usually) bearing in on any one thing or event in my life, as the question used is asking for a more general outlook. This is a self care exercise, and is not meant as a predictive reading… although that, too, happens on occasion.

The question is… What do I need to focus for self-care through the week ahead?

Tarot Maddonni, Saltwater Reading Cards, Sea Melodies Cards

Earth – Five of Coins and Generosity – Instead of focusing on what you don’t have, stay focused upon what you do and share that with others. You will enjoy what you have more if it is shared instead of kept to yourself.

Air – Death and Dream – The emotional growth you are experiencing has great potential as long as you don’t let your mind pull you astray. Instead, allow your mind to focus on what you want, because the end of one thing opens up room for another to take its place. And you want to make sure you direct your focus and attention towards the outcome you want, rather than a return to what you’ve known thus far.

Water – The Hanged Man and Stillness – Take this week to wallow in where you’re at. A time to rest is a time to reflect, and that’s what needs to happen during this week of rest you’ve decided to give yourself.  Allow yourself room to explore where you’re at and become comfortable there.

Fire – Queen of Swords, Two of Wands, Ambition – During this time of reflection, don’t forget to give some thought to the direction you want to move in. Apply logic and careful, strategic consideration to the path you’ve chosen and make sure you allow room for your ambitions to flourish in or you will soon end up outgrowing your shell and again have to begin building yet another.

Waning – Tides (Cycles) – This week you will find yourself moving away from the oscillation between extremes that the tides of the ocean represent. As the water “sloshes” one way then the other in response to the moon’s draw, it rises to its greatest depths, and then retreats to its lowest of points again and again. Emotions and inner struggles can also have this type of cycle, but this week it will be important to focus on smoothing out the waves and allowing the tides of your inner self to settle and calm.

Waxing – Giant Clam (Harmony) – The guidebook for this deck speaks of the symbiosis between the Giant Clam and the algae that lives within its shell and feeds the clam the nutrients it needs to survive. Like this symbiosis, you need to remember this week that you are not in this life alone. You depend upon others and they depend upon you.  Allow that balance to flourish and be careful to not shut others out.

Take Away – This week needs to be about rest and recuperation, but also about looking ahead and plotting a course as well as inner reflection.  Taking this time away from work allows me time for these things, and I need to make sure that I’m not pushing them away and trying to hide from them.

DECKS USED: TAROT MADDONNI, SALTWATER READING CARDS, SEA MELODIES DECK