tarot for self care

Avoidance

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Today’s meditation was fifteen minutes long, and I nearly fell asleep there at the end.  I was just so comfortable and the temperature was just right… it was hard to drag my ass up to get working.   And on that note, I promise that when I soak in the tub on Saturday (or maybe tomorrow), that I won’t nap in there.   I’ll be careful.

Hush Tarot - Eight of CupsToday’s draw is the Eight of Cups, which is traditionally a representation of emotionally disconnecting and/or walking away.  This type of withdrawal or abandonment is usually created through a sense of disappointment, although other emotions are also able to be at play in bringing this card’s theme to the forefront.

What stands out to me in this card is the Fae girl in the lower left corner and the fact that she is pulling on (or off) a hood/headdress that had her concealed as a blackbird.  This brought to mind the phrase “a wolf in sheep’s clothing”, which then had me wondering… who is she hiding from?  What is it she hides from?   What has she need to retreat from or distance herself from that she has to conceal herself under the cloak of feathers?

And there is the message in today’s card.   It’s time to look at what I am avoiding.  What am I trying to distance myself from in life, and why haven’t I cut the ties entirely instead of trying to hide and avoid? I don’t have the answers to this right now, but it’s something that needs to be mulled over.

DECK USED:  HUSH TAROT

#Zentember #LovelyHealing Challenge Prompt
Question: Where do I need to bring light in?

Archeon Tarot

Reading Summary: Your mental dialogue (skull imagery in the Ace of Swords) and inner process is to conflicted (Five of Wands). Your bad habits are blinding you (Eight of Swords) to the good.

Take Away:  You need to be nicer to yourself and open your eyes to the positive instead of always settling on the negative and pessimistic views that are your habit.  This applies to both your inner dialogue with yourself, as well as your outlook on the world at large.  The pessimism and negativity is creeping in.  Be aware of it and deal with it… don’t just turn a blind eye and let it grow.

Oh…. shit.   And there’s the answer to what I’m avoiding from my COTD today.

DECK USED:  ARCHEON TAROT

#DiscordTarotholicsSep2020 Challenge Prompt
Question: What projects and energies am I taking with me into Autumn?

Telluric TarotReading Summary: New emotional growth (Ace of Cups)… growth by keeping the past in its place (Six of Cups under Death) instead of allowing it free reign.  Fostering my relationships through connecting with those important to me (Two of Cups).

The Wisteria and Peridot card is an indication of hope and positive inspiration on an emotional level.  It speaks of my emotional growth not being over, but still being in the budding stages.  I love the combination peridot and wisteria in this card because it feels so hopeful and positive.

In the Adder Stone and Clover, we see the energies of childhood experience, enchantment, and curiosity.  With the card that sits atop this card being what it is (will cover that in a moment) what I see in this card is a reference to my childhood.

The Aragonite and Ghost Pipe card pins the childhood reference in place on the table.  It holds it down and keeps it in its place. Both aragonite and ghost pipe are highly unusual in how they appear in the world.  They speak of life rising from what one would think as inhospitable environments, and beauty formed through organic growth.

Lastly we come to the Amazonite and Forget-Me-Nots (Myotosis).  There is a harmony to the Amazonite, which in this card is features in a cluster combined with Smoky Quartz.  The Myotosis then lends a gentle warmth to the representation of coexistence and mutual growth.

Take Away: My emotional growth will continue through the Autumn months and, unlike last year, I need to make sure to keep my past in the past.  That means not allowing father issues to rise up as the veil gets thinner late next month.  Depending on Gideon and others that I have a close emotional connection with can help me in keeping things in balance.

DECK USED:  TELLURIC TAROT

Lionharts #AstroTarotChallenge
Question: In what direction am I being asked to personally grow starting this month?

Tyldwick Tarot

Reading Summary:  There’s going to be a sudden collapse and shift in direction over this month concerning my personal growth (Three of Staves under the Tower).  Remember that new beginnings (Ace of Coins) sometimes take a good deal of time to grow into anything of value, but the wait is worth it (Seven of Coins).

Take Away: This is about my emotional growth, and having to change gears abruptly into the whole business aspect of things. There will be a moment of frustration involved in the kicking off of this new perspective where income is concerned.  This is to be expected and happens every year.  Patience is important.  Just keep plugging away at it and soon you’ll be reaping the rewards. 

(Then later on after the holiday rush is over, you can return to the emotional growth that has been your focus for so much of this year to date.)

DECK USED:  TYLDWICK TAROT

#ConnectWithYourDeckChallenge by E Roebuck-Jones
Question:What do I need in order to create success?

Tarot of Reincarnation

Reading Summary: Nurturing strength and dignity (Empress/Eagle) combined with a passionate pursuit of dreams (Queen of Clubs/Longhorn Beetle) and an unrelenting foundational strength (Queen of Diamonds/Lion).

Take Away:  In order to create success, I need to feel that I have a good foundation and nurturing energy to encourage me into following my dreams.  And of course, I need those dreams themselves as well, and the strength to accept and go after them regardless of how silly or impractical that they may seem.  Manifesting success is about making the impossible possible through intention, vision, and determination.

DECK USED:  TAROT OF REINCARNATION

Compassion

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Today’s meditation was was ten minutes long and one of the harp strings meditations with interval timer.   It was very relaxing, even if my piriformis stretches were pretty painful throughout the process. This is not a surprise as my physiotherapy / yoga practice is as well at the moment.  I’m paying the price of not going in to the chiro / sports medicine doc regularly.

Botan Tarot - The EmperorToday’s draw is the Emperor card, which is traditionally a representation of an authority figure or leadership.  This card is about  the responsibility and steady control as one makes decisions for the greater good.

Sometimes, when making decisions for the greater good, we have to disregard our own wishes and desires.  It sucks, but that’s what being the responsible party is all about.  It’s about working towards the well being of all instead of the individual.   This is the message that stands out to me today in the imagery of this card.  The man in the picture is weathered and tough, but his eyes hold a hint of kindness as well.   Strength tempered by compassion.

And whether you lead or follow, whether you’re the man on top of the mountain, or just one of the grunts climbing the hill?  We all have strengths.  The important thing is that we wield those strengths with compassion.

DECK USED:  BOTAN TAROT

#Zentember #LovelyHealing Challenge Prompt
Question: Where do I shine?

Art Nouveau Tarot c. 1989

Reading Summary:  Reevaluation (Four of Cups) of my strategies (Seven of Swords) when things change or go awry (The Wheel).

Take Away:  This is about adaptability, and making things up “on the fly” in order to keep moving even when roadblocks try to trip me up. The thing is, I don’t see anything in life as a real “road block” but more a challenge.  Stopping is not an option because life just doesn’t work that way, so it’s important to be able to adapt and adjust and keep moving, even when it feels like you’ve reached the end of the road. 

DECK USED:  ART NOUVEAU TAROT c.1989

#DiscordTarotholicsSep2020 Challenge Prompt
Philosophical Question: What are the 3 major strengths of humanity?

WilderWoven TarotTwo of Swords – Free Will – Humanity has the ability to make choices, to exercise free will upon themselves and their situation.  Although sometimes our choices are not always appealing, there are always choices open to us. We are able to dream our dreams, and make choices based upon what we want out of life.

The Emperor – Autonomy – With free will comes the autonomy to create out own fate and move forward in the direction we choose. Sometimes we must make a round-about path to get there, but ultimately we choose for ourselves where we are going on our path.

The Devil – Transcendence –   Which then leads us the ability to transcend.  This is not about “spiritual transcendence” to a new level of consciousness, but rather the ability to pull ourselves out of bad situations through our free will and autonomy and into a different situation or better place either mentally or physically.

DECK USED:  WILDERWOVEN TAROT

Lionharts #AstroTarotChallenge
Question: What is my biggest strength (or personal superpower)?

Hardy Tarot

Reading Summary:  Potential growth (Ace of Disks) through nurturing (Queen of Cups) and recuperation (Four of Swords).

Take Away:  As much as I struggle with giving myself the nurturing warmth and rest that I need, the fact is that I am able to physically bounce back rather quickly when I do fulfill those needs. After multiple car accidents, and more injuries than I can count throughout the three decades of my life so far,  my recoveries have always been impressively quick, and even more so if  I  allow myself the self love and recuperation needed during those times of healing.

DECK USED:  HARDY TAROT

#ConnectWithYourDeckChallenge by E Roebuck-Jones
Question: How can I appreciate all of my talents?

El Goliath Tarot 2nd Edition

Reading Summary: Remember how much you have overcome (Starseed atop Five of Pentacles), and where you come from as well as how much you have grown along the way (King of Swords atop Page of Swords).  Take care to act sans impulsivity (Knight of Swords).

Take Away: Impulsive action is not my friend and in order to appreciate my talents, I need to use them in ways that support my growth and keep me moving forward.  That requires both forethought, as well as trust in my moral compass to lead me forward in a positive direction.

DECK USED:  EL GOLIATH TAROT

The Pursuit of Happiness

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Today’s meditation was ten minutes long and another fidgety meditation session.  I think that I need another hike to get out some of this pent up energy.  I’ve reorganized my decks and I went through and tucked labels into all of my swaddled decks today as well. And yet, as much as I’m feeling the need to expend energy?  I do not seem at all inclined to spend it on work.  Go figure, right?

Hush Tarot - Knight of CupsToday’s draw is the Knight of Cups, which is traditionally a representation of an active beta energy, personality, or person in the area of one’s emotions, relationships, intuition, and creativity.  This often portrays itself in a theme of going after what brings someone joy or following your imagination and creativity into new adventures.

What stands out to me most strongly in the imagery of this card today is the guy down at the lower left corner holding the spear.  How funny is it that there’s so much going on in this image, so much to draw the eye, and yet it’s that little head and shoulders and the spear that draws my gaze.

I think sometimes we all need a little prodding to get going on doing the things that are good for us, and going after your joy is definitely good as long as you aren’t… you know… going after heroin or something.  In general, happiness is important to our well being, and yet sometimes we hold back without any real reason behind why.  That spear looks like a really good prod to get things going, don’t you think?

The message in this card is to stop hesitating and just do the stuff that’ll make you happy instead of thinking about it and putting it off.   You’ll feel better and be much happier if you just do it already.

DECK USED:  HUSH TAROT

#Zentember #LovelyHealing Challenge Prompt
Question: What’s my essence?

Tarot by Alexander Daniloff 2012 IV edition

Reading Summary: Someone that teaches others (Il Papa) how to find their direction (Three of Wands) during their darkest hours (Ten of Swords).

Take Away:  This somehow makes sense to me in… okay so I relate to this because of something that Gideon said to me… has said to me.  Or maybe he was saying it to someone else and I just overheard it?   Anyway, he said that I have this tendency to tell people exactly what they need to hear, just exactly when they need it most.  Like when I told him guilt makes for a crappy relationship (can’t remember the exact words) and it was in that moment he needed to hear it to realize the truth of his situation with is ex.

I don’t usually realize I’ve done this, and yet I know it happens because Gideon has said he’s seen it happen. Others have said similar as well.   And so I understand and believe… and very much relate to what’s said in these cards.   I love that I have the ability to help people in this way, and I’m okay with not being aware of having done it in most cases. As long as I’m helping others to make their lives better, and thus the world a better place?  I’m good with being oblivious for the most part.

DECK USED:  TAROT BY ALEXANDER DANILOFF 2012 IV EDITION

#DiscordTarotholicsSep2020 Challenge Prompt
Question: What do I need to focus on for self care this full moon?

Dragon Age Inquisition TarotReading Summary: That is one hell of a Three of Staves.  Just sayin’.  This is a newer deck for me and the first time I’ve spent any quality time with it since I received it.  And.. wow on the Three of Staves… just sayin’.

Continue to move forward (Three of Staves), even if it’s done with caution (imagery on the Three of Staves overlapped on the Page of Cups), in the direction of my emotional growth and finding the balance for it in my life (Page of Cups).  Don’t allow my internal anxieties and worries to overshadow this process (Nine of Swords). I’m internally strong enough to keep these things from growing and festering into something that will become a hindrance (The High Priestess).

Take Away:  For self care during this full moon I need to make sure that my anxieties and worries are not standing in the way of getting that emotional growth to a place of pause a safety for the upcoming holiday rush.  This isn’t about backsliding, but it’s about preservation of progress.  Allow my inner strength to shine through and burn off the cloying touch of my anxieties so that I move forward instead of backsliding.

DECK USED:  DRAGON AGE INQUISITION TAROT

Lionharts #AstroTarotChallenge
Question: Generate your birth chart at astro-charts.com and scroll down to houses to learn about your zodiac signs per house.

Houses

Information on the zodiac signs through each house means can be found here.

#ConnectWithYourDeckChallenge by E Roebuck-Jones
Question: What helps me stay positive?

Haindl Tarot

Reading Summary:  My “cup overflowing” with the love of others (Three of Cups) that is fostered through clear and strong communication (The Tower and the Queen of Swords).

The imagery here in The Tower of this deck is about enlightenment destroying the Tower of Babble.  This creates a dynamic in this specific card in this specific deck where the card has the ability to represent the salvation of good communication. 

In this way, communication doesn’t just bracket the Three of Cups in this reading, but are representative of pillars of strength standing strong on either side of the card of connection and emotion.

Take Away: Communication with those I love and trust helps me to stay positive.  It is the cornerstone of any good relationship, and being open and honest with these people fosters the bonds I have built with them.  I am, in fact, unable to always bring about my own positivity and optimism. I need their help to do this sometimes, and it is with their help and love surrounding me, as well as their wise council, that I’m able to take their support and advice without fear of betrayal.  This allows my trust to flourish so that I am able to share the  deepest and darkest parts of myself.  They are my shaft of light shining into the darkness.

DECK USED:  HAINDL TAROT

Transitioning from August to September

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This is a spread that I do at the end of each month to close out the month.

Month End Tarot Check In - Hilda Tarot, Roots and Wings Oracle

Individuality – The High Priestess, Six of Swords, Earth Mother – I’m in the process of trying to find a balance between my intuitive self and my more grounded qualities.  I’ve recently discovered that to find an easy balance is going to take scrapping old methods and rebuilding a dynamic that is more hospitable to both.

Dependence – Nine of Pentacles, Nine of Cups, The Divine – As I move further into the fall and closer to the holiday rush, I begin to step away from a sense of wallowing in the comfort and security I’ve created.  Although spirituality will continue to play a part in my life even through the silly season, I am aware that I will need to let go of some practices for a bit until things calm down again.

Creativity – King of Wands, Potential, Wildness – I leave behind the shelter of wallowing in comfort in order to reach for what I want out of the months to come.  I focus ahead now, seeking the potential that the holiday rush represents.  It’s a wild ride, but one I willingly do each year as my finances depend upon the holiday rush to balance out.

Limitation – Seven of Swords and Perseverance – While looking ahead toward the holiday rush, don’t freak out about the time passing by.  You only have so long to prepare for what’s coming, but you need to accept as well that distractions happen and using time for self care and other things that are good for you  isn’t wasting time.  Yes, it might mean you get a bit less done, but it means that you are building yourself up to last longer in the long run.

Change – The Magician and The Void – The Magician has been following me around a lot over the past few days.  It is a reminder that I am a strong and capable person, well prepared and well educated, and more than able to deal with anything that comes my way.  Do not allow uncertainty to convince you otherwise.

Sympathy – The Star, The Fool, Vulnerability – These cards are a reminder of a past event that is relevant at this time.  The message here is about how sometimes you just blindly have faith and go after what you want and… even though such times often result in uncertainty and vulnerability… you always end up coming out the other side okay.  Wounds heal… experience lasts forever and teaches you how to deal with things a different and better way the next time.

Luck – The World and Transformation – I have a chance to make lasting changes at this time.  It’s important to not look back, and not backslide.  Keep your eye on the prize and reach for those changes and strive for forward motion.  I’ve spent the lions share of this year working at not just emotional growth, but in finding a better balance between work and life.  Now that I am entering into the time of year that is the most stressful for me, I need to make sure that my focus on preparation doesn’t turn into obsession and edge out the progress I’ve made over the last few months.

Power – Wheel of Fortune, Knight of Pentacles, Joy – Don’t allow the little irritations and upsets steal away my confidence, my progress, or my joy.  Just yesterday I did a reading that spoke on this.   Shit happens.  You need to roll with the punches and keep moving.  Adapt and continue instead of letting hurdles stand in your way and block your path forward.

Responsibility – Eight of Pentacles, Time, Hope – The future opportunity here is about my work and time management. It’s about making sure that I am staying optimistic and using my time wisely to prepare for what’s coming.  I’ve gone through the rush a number of times now. I know what I need to have done ahead of time to make things go more smoothly.

Message from Spirit World – You are capable and strong, knowledgeable and powerful in your own right.  Life is a series of ups and downs, but you have the grounded spirit, the capable hands, and the know-how to take on the world and suss out what you want from it.

Message from Mind’s World – Move forward from the swaddled comfort of the summer and into the new energy of the fall.  This time of harvest for so many is your time of preparation.  Allow your spark to catch fire and lead you forward to where you need to be mentally, physically, and emotionally. Preparation for the holiday season is about more than just the supplies and products that need to be made and stockpiled… because you need to be readied as well.

Message from Known World – Spending some time having a bit of fun might feel like a waste of time, but it’s actually a deeply seated need that you have to attend to in order to continue to grow and get to where you want to be not just in the physical world with your business, but emotionally and spiritually as well.

Take Away – Balance. This is all about balance and making sure that I’m not neglecting the needs of my body, mind, emotions, and spirituality by sacrificing them on the altar of work and commerce. It’s okay to take time for yourself.  It’s okay to have a little fun and allow your mind to slide away from work and the business prep for the holidays for a bit now and then.  It will not be the end of the world if you aren’t focusing every single ounce of your attention and energy on what’s coming in November.

DECKS USED:  THE HILDA TAROT, ROOTS AND WINGS POCKET ORACLE

Side note:   I just noticed for the first time in this post that when I am doing readings for myself, I bounce between first person and second person as if I am both simultaneously reading to myself as myself… and reading to myself as if across the table from myself.

Everyone Is Lovable To Someone

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Today’s meditation was just over ten minutes long and was relatively uneventful and quiet.  Which is honestly a little surprising because that never seems to happen anymore.  The fire alarm decided to wait until after I’d gotten through my meditation to go off tho, so that was nice at least.

And yes, everything is fine.  It looks like someone was trying to break into the storage room and a buddy of theirs went and pulled the fire alarm to work as a distraction to give them time without interruption.    They didn’t get in so… yeah.

Next World Tarot - Three of CupsToday’s draw is the Three of Cups, which is traditionally interpreted as a “joyous joining” of friends whether in celebration, or collaboration, or just in friendship on its own.

Honestly? I’m not sure how I feel about the pink smiling shark.  I find it really distracting in the imagery of this card, and so I suppose I should consider it as the message.  The fact is, though? It’s just weird.

That said?  I can work with that.   It stands out…. so lets go with the shark.  The shark in this card appears among others and does not show its teeth.  Instead it is a shade of friendly pink and sports a smile.  This actually hearkens back to something I was thinking about in the shower yesterday. I had a client recently that insisted that they were unlovable and would never find a partner.  They were very upset and I refused to do a reading for them on that day. Instead, I told them I had something for them to think about.   I told them that even some of the shittiest people in the world that have people that love them.  Assholes and abusers, haters and closed minded bigots.  These horrible people managed to find someone to love them, so someone like him that isn’t horrible? Has not just as much of a chance of finding someone, but even more of a chance at it.

The shark clearly has friends in this imagery even though it’s a predator swimming among creatures he considers food.  Instead the shark gets along with them, makes friends with them.   So too can those that feel they are unlikable or unlovable find friendships and love.

The message in this card is that no one is unlovable.  No one is unlikable. We just feel that way sometimes.

And can I just say?  Sometimes at the end of the month I’m not ready to move on to different decks and wish for more time with the ones I’ve worked with for the month… but this month?  I’m so ready to move on from this deck and the Tarot of the Sidhe.  I can’t wait for the decks that come up for these pulls starting tomorrow.

DECK USED:  NEXT WORLD TAROT

#TarotForGrowthAugust Challenge Prompt
Topic: I’m struggling to move past trauma.
Question: What’s the next actionable step I can take to move forward down the path of healing?

Tarot of the Dream Enchantress

Reading Summary: Stay strong (Strength) in the face of change (Death)… your foundation might feel precarious but it is sturdy and will be okay (Four of Pentacles).

Take Away:  It’s about perseverance. Sometimes actionable steps are not actions at all, but more about being aware and standing strong.  Change is a part of life and sometimes those changes that happen can feel like the end of the world.  The cards here are a reminder that it isn’t the end of the world.  It isn’t all going to fall apart.  Your foundation and will continue to stay solid and strong. 

DECK USED:  TAROT OF THE DREAM ENCHANTRESS

#DiscordTarotholicsAug2020 Challenge Prompt
Topic: Write something free form inspired by the cards.

Spark and Pen TarotLate at night in the deep deepest darkest hours before twilight, the green lady with the crown puts down her torch and her book, and pulls on her cape (The Empress). She goes to visit Coney Island to ride the Wonder Wheel and enjoy all that Luna Park has to offer (Wheel of Fortune). Soon, she will have to return to her place watching over the city, and pick up her torch and her book once more for another day (Death).

DECK USED:  SPARK AND PEN TAROT

Lionharts #TheAugustTarot #ElementalChallenge
Question: How can I best support and nurture myself and my personal growth at this time?

Hilda Tarot

Reading Summary: Accept that sometimes shit happens (Justice) and you’ll have to make the best of it (Knight of Swords). Take those moments to rest and recuperate (Four of Swords) so that she can be ready for the next challenge (The Magician).

Take Away:  The advice here to help me in nurturing myself and fostering my personal growth is that I need to not let the little unexpected surprises in life trip me up so much.  Hurdles happen and just like tripping over a root on a trail in the woods, you have to pick your ass up and keep going because no one is going to come for you if you sit there and whine about it to the trees.

DECK USED:  HILDA TAROT

#ConnectWithYourDeckChallenge by E Roebuck-Jones
Question: How would I feel if I was more mindful right now?

Stunning Tarot

Reading Summary:  Hol-eee-shit.  *Eyes the cards.* Okay so if I was more mindful right now I’d be feeling a good deal more defeated (Ten of Swords) and in need of rest and retreat because the world (Four of Swords) would feel like everything is falling apart (The Tower).

Take Away:  The lesson here is that mindfulness is not always your friend. Sometimes you have to be a bit oblivious and obtuse just to get through the day.

DECK USED:  STUNNING TAROT

Full Moon in Pisces – September 2020

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Full Moon in Pisces Tarot Spread - The Botan Tarot

Tomorrow night will be the full moon, and like all new moons and full moons, I’ve done a spread aligned to the moon’s current themes as a part of my recognition of the moon’s cycle and influences upon us.  Today’s spread is brought to you by Ethony‘s Tarot By the Moon series.

1. What message does my intuition want to deliver?

Justice – Awareness is really important right now. Don’t allow yourself to be baited into going against your moral compass due of someone’s hidden motivations. You need to be paying attention not just to what’s going on around you, but make sure that you are examining motivations.  Both your own, as well as the motivations of others.

2. How can I connect more with my intuitive side?

The Fool – Let some of the starch out of your britches and relax. Your intuition works best when allowed to flow free. As you already know, gripping too tight or trying to be too stringent with yourself will smother that intuitive voice.

3. What emotions need healing?

Five of Cups and The Devil – There’s a lot of depression and self destructive urges lurking under the surface and although I work to heal them a little at  a time, and I am progressing… I still have a long way to go. It’s a daily struggle to lean into optimism, and to police those self destructive urges. Some more easily sneak under the radar than others.  It’s not surprising that the depression and self destruction would come up here, as it’s a long term journey… not  a short sprint.

4. How can I let go?

The Star –  I mentioned this in the previous question.  It has to do with leaning into optimism, working towards positivity, and foster hope in your heart on a daily basis.  These things are not easy for me, just as they would not be easy for pessimist… but if I want to make true progress on my healing journey, they are a necessary part of the process.

5. What self care do I need to focus on?

The Magician and Temperance – It’s important at this time to foster a little faith that you can handle whatever comes. Don’t stress out over the future and what’s coming along down the road, instead take time to focus on the present and allow your knowledge and skill to speak for itself when the time comes.

Staying in the present instead of pushing toward the future is not an easy thing for me, but it’s a form of moderation I’ve been working at exercising all spring and summer and will continue to work at into the fall.

DECK USED: THE BOTAN TAROT