fortune telling

Morning Bonus Read – The KWL Approach

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The prompt for this reading came from one of my Discord servers and is as follows:
“A learning-themed divination spread, based on the “KWL” charts.”

Scooby Doo Playing Cards1. Topic: What is a topic I should be focusing my learning efforts on?

Nine of Clubs and Queen of Hearts – Better boundaries for a healthier emotional balance. You can’t always let everyone’s demands for your time and attention tap you out.  Don’t forget that you need time for yourself too, no matter how much of yourself you feel the desire to give to others.

2a. K (Know): What do I already know about this topic?

Jack of Diamonds – You know that you’re already on the right path and that it’s going to take some time. That, as long as you stay focused on what you want to build and where you want to take it, that it will come over time.

2b. K (Know): Where does my prior knowledge and experience help me in understanding this topic?

Three of Clubs – They give you direction and motivation to keep going. You know what a detriment not having healthy boundaries can be for you.  You know that without them, you become overwhelmed and the world begins to feel like it’s falling apart.  And you know that without those boundaries, you are far more likely to become vulnerable to the wrong people, which can cause damage that goes far deeper than just burnout (ie: the “pissant” incident). All of this knowledge provides motivation and direction, and helps to keep you on track where your boundaries are concerned.

3a. W (Wonder): What things have I already been wondering about related to this topic?

Jack of Spades – How to strategize my way forward at a faster pace.  Obviously I know that this is a bad idea and it’s my past and my negative habits that inspire this topic of curiosity.  But, there’s no denying that it’s there.

3b. W (Wonder): What things have I already been wanting to do related to this topic?

Six of Clubs – How to more easily pave the path to getting there. This isn’t about speed so much as it’s about stumbling blocks and wanting to move forward without a lot of struggle and stress. “Harmonizing the journey” so to speak, so that it can go more smoothly.  This is something I’ve been wanting to do.

4a. L (Learn): What am I already learning about this topic?

Three of Hearts – There are people in my life eager and happy to help lift me up and support me. I don’t have to do it alone. And, in fact, probably shouldn’t do it alone even if I might want to or feel that urge.

4b. L (Learn): What will I be learning about this topic soon?

Three of Spades – Setbacks happen.

DECK USED:  SCOOBY DOO! PLAYING CARDS

Morning Bonus Read – Emotional Arrow

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Emotional Arrow Tarot Spread - Mermaid Cats Tarot

Emotion Addressed In This Reading:  An Irrational Sense of Overwhelm

1. SOURCE: What prompted this emotion? What lies at the root of it?

Five of Cups – Feelings of never enough / never good enough. This isn’t about social issues, which is its own beast and separate from this.  This is about never feeling as if anything you do is enough.  Not enough work, not enough effort, not enough quality, not enough perfection.  It spurs from the echo of your parent’s voice in your head always telling you that “you can do better”.  Get an A on a test… “you could do better, your penmanship is poor”.  Get straight A’s in school… “you could do more, why aren’t you playing sports or doing extracurriculars?”  It was never enough… never good enough.  And somehow, it is an echo that has continued to push you forward, and beat you down, years and years after having left that environment and influence.

2. IMPACT: How is this emotion affecting me now? How is it riding me?

Eight of Wands – Push. Push. Push. Push.  That feeling of never enough and never good enough pushes you to always strive for more.  More output.  More perfection. Just… more.  It’s not enough to make beautiful jewelry, it has to be perfect. It’s not enough to sell enough that you’re working the majority of every day’s hours, sell more.  Do more.  Make more.  Be better.  Always… no matter how much or how well you’re already doing.

3. NAVIGATION: How can I better harness, navigate, and channel it?

Two of Wands – Pick a direction. ONE direction.  Pick a focus. ONE focus.  Stop trying to do so much at once, and splitting your attention and your energy in so many directions at once. You can’t be in two places at once, and you only have two hands.  Choose that direction, that focus, and leave the other stuff behind to possibly take up at another time.

4. MESSAGE: What is this emotion trying to tell me?

Knight of Swords – You’re pushing too hard and it’s taking you in the wrong direction (cat on the card is facing the past).  All of this drive comes from an ugly place in your past and you need to work on moving forward, not backward.  That includes recognizing and letting go of these influences that are not healthy and only perpetuate self abuse through impulsivity and misplaced determination.

5. TARGET: Best outcome/goal of working constructively with emotion.

King of Pentacles – Stability. Surety. Ownership. Resolving the issues surrounding this motion can allow you to find a more grounded and secure foundation in the present.  This foundation then will influence all aspects of your life from your work to your home life and your feelings of security, providing a more comfortable and self assured outlook on your current life as well as future plans.

6a. OVERKILL: How does this emotion mislead me?

Six of Wands – This emotion and the history behind it that pushes it on misleads you by causing you to look outside your self for validation that you’re doing enough. No one else’s opinion on this topic matters. Only yours.  You can’t earn the approval from those parents in your past, now that you’re in the present.  That time is gone and there’s no one to judge how you do, what you do, or how much you do… except you.

6b. OVERKILL: How might it take me too far?

Page of Cups Rx – Taken too far, you lose your connection to your inner curiosity and creativity. You become beaten down by these judgements and start to feel like giving up.  There is no more joy, and with no joy you begin to lose your sense of curiosity.  Without that sense of curiosity to spark your creativity, that too begins to flag and falter.

Side Note:  I spoke to my shrink about these issues yesterday and she suggested trying to compartmentalize my past from my present.  To help me in remembering that the past is the past, a different chapter in a book… read and left behind.  I am in a new chapter now than I was then.  In doing this, she suggests that it might help me in letting go of those feelings of “not enough / not good enough” as well as the feelings concerning fear of scarcity.

DECK USED:  MERMAID CATS TAROT

Morning Bonus Read – Body In Pain

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Sawyer's Lenormand Oracle

Check-in on my overall energy.

Tree – Flagging and not particularly the greatest.  Although you are no longer flirting with burnout at every turn, neither are you taking care of yourself as well as you could… or should.  Slacking on your physiotherapy, eating too much junk, and not getting enough outside time and exercise are all starting to take their toll both physically as well as energetically.

Is there something this pain is trying to tell me?

Snake – You’re doing this to yourself.  Your betrayal of your body is all self imposed and the results that come from it are created by you and you alone.

How can I make it easier to hear what this pain has to say?

Fish – Stop fighting against the current and go with the flow.  Begin shifting and adapting to get back on track.  You don’t have to do it all at once, but you do need to start gravitating in that direction instead of just continuing blindly on this path of self destruction.

How can I release the harsh perception of this pain as my enemy?

Child – See it as a call to start again and refresh what you’re doing.  The pain isn’t an enemy but the result of bad choices.  By clearing out the old and taking a more youthful, open eyed approach to the situation you will better see your pain as an ally to guide you rather than an enemy to struggle against.

How can I support myself physically while this pain is present?

Mountain – Accept it as the fucking monstrous hurdle that it is.  Your pain is permanent, but the levels can be managed.  This reading is about how you deal with that hurdle, not eliminating it.

How can I support myself emotionally while this pain is present?

Moon – Understand that as long as your pain is out of control, so too will be your emotions. Just accepting this fact alone can help you in better supporting yourself emotionally, as it gives you a rational view of the constantly shifting emotions going on, as well as the jagged emotional highs and lows the pain creates.

DECK USED:  SAWYER’S LENORMAND ORACLE

Morning Bonus Read – Boundaries

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The prompt for this reading came from one of my Discord servers and is as follows:
“This week’s prompt is on the theme of boundaries. Let’s do some divination to better understand our boundaries, using Goldilocks reasoning.”

Johannes Brahms Composers Luxury Playing CardsIn what areas of life are my boundaries too hard (trying so hard to protect me that they end up injuring me or preventing growth)?

Myself – Three of Clubs – forcing people to stay at a distance so that I don’t get hurt. Expecting betrayal, and thus building my inner walls too hard and too deep so that nothing can get through to touch me.

Others – Six of Diamonds – Shutting people out so strenuously that they do not have the ability to get through to help me when I need help.

In what areas of life are my boundaries too soft (not being enforced, not clearly delineated where they need to be, etc)?

Myself – Jack of Spades – I don’t allow myself to move at slower pace when in the process of learning new skills or ideas. This means I take on too much instead of buckling down on one thing at a time.

Others – King of Spades – I take too much on myself instead of delegating more effectively. This allows people to take advantage and do less instead of standing up and doing their share.

In what areas of my life are my boundaries just right?

Myself – Jack of Hearts – Having slowed down on the pursuit of the things that interest me and that I want in life. It used to be I try to do everything and be everything, and get everything done all at once so that I could have all that I wanted in life as fast as possible. I’ve learned to better pace myself in those pursuits.

Others – King of Clubs – I allow myself to teach what I want to teach, and what is a passion to me, instead of just letting whatever others want to learn be the basis of what I am willing to share.

DECK USED:  JOHANNES BRAHMS COMPOSERS LUXURY PLAYING CARDS

Morning Bonus Read – Feeling the Feels

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Cheimonette Tarot

Feels I’m Feeling

The Devil  – Temptation to self destruct.  Anti-depressants are a massive help to keeping me well balanced, but they don’t resolve everything.  This temptation comes and goes.  Sometimes it is stronger than others.  This isn’t about death, but rather about turning my entire life upside down, and razing the entire thing and everything I’ve worked for and built to the ground. This temptation is sneaky… slipping in to try and nudge and whisper, insidious and conniving as it works to tempt me astray.

The World – Potential for the new and different. I can see it glimmering in the distance, that promise of something new and better, of growth and transition.  I see it and sense it, I want to push for it and seize it… but I know that’s not how this works.  Growth takes time.

Feels I’m Ignoring
Ace of Disks atop The Moon, Five of Disks

Financial uncertainty and scarcity issues. This is a very strong theme in my life, and a driving force of my motivation a great deal of the time.  It’s a fear that I struggle with, and have struggled with ever since my emancipation from my parents at sixteen.   I am, at this time, doing my best to accept that I’ve done well for myself.  That I’m comfortable and safe, and that everything is stable.  There is no need for this fear and no need for it to rule my life.  I’m working at not allowing it to have such a loud and overpowering voice in my life.

Feels I Need To Embrace

Two of Staves – Pick a direction. Stagnancy sucks. I’ve felt like I’ve been stuck and waffling. I understand the need to pick a direction and I feel that I’ve begun that process.  It’s just taking far longer than I’m comfortable with.

Nine of Cups – Gratitude directed toward the self and toward having put myself in a place where I now have the time and space to even do “the feels” at all.

Feels I Should Feel More Often

Death – Embracing change instead of fighting against it.  It’s so hard not to struggle against change or fall into the feelings of fear and uncertainty that change can bring rise to.   Not all change is bad, though.  And even the change that feels bad?  Sometimes turns out all the better for having happened. Embracing change is hard, but I’m working on doing so more and more.

Seven of Cups – Feeling empowered by my wealth of options instead of overwhelmed by them. This is a perspective change that I’m not always able to shift into.  I can see it.  That wealth of opportunity… but I can’t sometimes get my emotions to follow along with that positive perspective I can see.  So, it’s like I can see it, but not quite touch it.

Feels I should Share With Others

Six of Swords – Discuss with them the desire you have to change direction.

Ten of Cups – Share this adventure with them and make them a part of the whole.

DECK USED:  CHEIMONETTE TAROT

Morning Bonus Read – Perspectives

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The prompt for this reading came from one of my Discord servers and is as follows:
“Sometimes an outside perspective is helpful. Do a divination reading about yourself from the perspective of someone else. Maybe ask a spirit or deity who cares for you what they see when they look at you.”

SINS Anima Playing CardsWhat do my spirit guides notice about my body?

Six of Hearts – You’re working at finding better harmony. This isn’t an easy task, but you’re slowly becoming more accepting and more kind to yourself, and at finding a way to balance your wants and desires with your body’s needs.

What do my spirit guides notice about my mind?

Ten of Clubs – Overloaded. So many plans and ideas, so much judgement of self, so much inner dialog getting in the way and making you feel overwhelmed even when you’re not actually being overburdened at all.

What do my spirit guides notice about my heart?

Two of Diamonds – Your heart knows where it wants to be rooted, but you’re playing tug of war with it. It’s not a weed, stop treating it like one.

What do my spirit guides notice about my soul?

Six of Diamonds – You are generous with giving of yourself. Sometimes too much so. You offer so much of yourself to others that at times it can be unhealthy for you.

What do my spirit guides notice about my life?

Two of Spades – Two paths before you and you are stuck at the crossroads.  That stagnant feeling you’ve been feeling lately is a sign of this crossroads and the internal struggle you’re going through in trying to “pick a lane”.

What do my spirit guides notice about my problems?

Four of Diamonds – Stop bracing for impact. It does no good and only holds you back. This is  a habit from your youth, and you don’t have to worry anymore about that second shoe dropping… or the first one for that matter.  Take a breath and relax.

What do my spirit guides notice about my general relationships?

Three of Spades – You’re always far too prepared to be disappointed by others. It’s okay to have a little faith in people and not be ready for them to rip your heart out.  It’s okay to not expect the worst.

What do my spirit guides notice about my relationship?

King of Spades – There is a great sense of security, and you know where you stand. You know that your advice and opinions are heard and valued, and that submissives really steer the ship. You know that his support is not a burden to him, even if logically from your perspective it feels like it should be.

What advice does my spirit guides have for me?

Queen of Spades – Own your forthright nature. Own the qualities that make you your mothers son. Your sense of values and moral compass will assure that you don’t follow in her footsteps. Instead, you will use these qualities for the good of others, instead of for your own selfish desires.

What warning do my spirit guides have for me?

Four of Hearts – Stop stalling when you need to get things done that you’re not enthusiastic about. Just get them done.

DECK USED:  SINS ANIMA PLAYING CARDS