Morning Bonus Read – Difficulties

Difficulties Tarot Spread - The Lunatic Tarot

What is difficult right now?
Ace of Wands

Keeping my motivation up and running when there’s so much to do and so little time.  It becomes frustrating to feel continuously like you’re falling behind only to have a moment of “Oh, I’m caught up” show up now and then for a moment long enough to get one deep breath before the race continues.

What can I learn from this struggle?
Judgement

Sometimes it makes me feel like I want to just set it all aside and walk away, and then I remember why I’m doing all this and it helps me stay the course. It’s about independence, and being able to live my life on my terms how I want to live.

What will help me move through it?
Knight of Wands atop Seven of Swords

Strategy and cunning carried forward on my desires for what I want to accomplish.  This is about determination and willpower, and the clever cunning to find a way to do it no matter what.  My skill at making sure I come out on top, even while being carried through the most violent of rapids, is what will help me move through this time of lack of motivation and struggle with my inspirational spark.

What do I have to look forward to?
Four of Cups

Soon enough you’ll have time to rest and recover and meditate and enjoy all that off time again that you were struggling to get used to in the summer.  And… you’ll probably struggle with again when the opportunity returns.

DECK USED:  THE LUNATIC TAROT

Morning Bonus Read – Personal Expectations

The prompt for this reading came from one of my Discord servers and is as follows:
“This week, let’s chat about our expectations of ourselves, especially during this busy time of the year.”

Ouija Playing Cards by HasbroWhat is one expectation I have of myself right now that is unhealthy?

Ten of Diamonds atop King of Hearts – That I can shoulder everything and not crack emotionally under the pressure like a dropped egg.  I am not the King of Hearts, and I do not do well under too much pressure, especially if my emotions become involved.  With my emotions at a higher level due to the emotional growth I’ve been fostering all spring and summer and the vulnerability that new growth has created, there is a risk of that shell being even more fragile than usual.

What is one expectation I have of myself right now that is healthy?

Ten of Hearts – Allowing my emotions to have free reign rather than being neatly boxed off and walled up for the next five to six weeks.  This seems counter intuitive to what is said in the advice above about what is unhealthy, and yet what this indicates is not that it is opposing advice, but rather that I need to find a better way of dealing with these emotions than closing them up in a dark cage in the basement.

How should I shift the unhealthy expectation into a healthy one?

King of Clubs – Use your drive and vision to motivate you into finding and using this better way of doing things.  New methods for old habits are hard for everyone, but you need to remember what you’re goals are… and that you can’t reach them unless you make these changes for the better.

Where should I look for support to make that change in my expectations?

Six of Clubs atop Queen of Clubs –  From those in your life that both admire you and inspire you.  With a foundation of admiration and moral support under your feet, you can take the inspiration that they create in you and carry it forward, even when things feel new, unsteady, vulnerable, or difficult.  That support system is there for you when you need it as long as you’re willing to reach for it.

DECK USED: OUIJA PLAYING CARDS BY HASBRO

Morning Bonus Read – Self Gratitude

Edgar Allan Poe Playing Cards - Gratitude Tarot Spread

How can I practice self-gratitude for my mind?

Seven of Clubs – Grace and music, rhythm and measure.  Harmony within passionate pursuits. Treat yourself to some quiet time with the music you love to experience on more than just an audible level. You have a variety of synesthesia chosen playlists to choose from to take your listening of music to a new level, maybe it’s time to consider using them for more than just listening, but meditation as well.

How can I practice self-gratitude for my heart?

Two of Diamonds – Don’t forget about balance.  Don’t leave it behind and believe you can ignore the need for it just to pick it back up once the holiday rush is over. Delving into the holiday rush and finding what pleasure you can in the whirlwind doesn’t mean abandoning moderation and measure, nor that you don’t have to still find some kind of balance along the way.

How can I practice self-gratitude for my soul?

Six of Diamonds – Self deception is not generosity or being kind to yourself.  Sometimes the truth hurts, but it is only through truth that you find what you need.  Be kind to yourself, but also be honest with yourself.  In doing this you both honor your soul as well as practice self-gratitude through the respect you give yourself and the moral compass that directs your feet along your path.

DECK USED: EDGAR ALLAN POE PLAYING CARDS

Morning Bonus Read – Releasing Chaos

The Ellis Deck - Shed That Shit Tarot Spread

What is disrupting my peace of mind?
Two of Pentacles atop Eight of Swords

I spent a good deal of time in the fall trying to run away from my thoughts and feelings about switching from the emotional growth of the summer to the responsibilities and overwhelm of the holiday rush.  Unfortunately, this created a bit of a procrastination situation that has developed into a harder time with balancing work and home now that the holiday rush has arrived.

Not being as prepared as I’d like to be (even though it’s my own damned fault) is definitely disrupting my peace of mind.

Why am I still allowing this to affect me?
Five of Cups

Because I regret fucking up. I’m experiencing the repercussions of the procrastination I indulged in during the fall. I do understand that I’m going to need to let this disappointment in myself go, though, as it will only cause me another hurdle during an already difficult and busy time.

How can I release what no longer serves me?
Five of Swords atop The Fool

The foundation of success lies in letting go and freeing myself to fully dive into the enthusiasm of the rush. There is pleasure and adventure in the process if I allow it… so let go of the tension and the tightness and the self-recriminations, and dive in.

DECK USED: THE ELLIS DECK TAROT 5TH EDITION

Morning Bonus Read – Situational Projections

The prompt for this reading came from one of my Discord servers and is as follows:
There is a LOT of energy in the world this week. We are all carrying and absorbing a lot of anxiety, relief, uncertainty, etc, I’d guess. It’s crucial during these kinds of times to try to pay attention to our intuition underneath the anxiety, although this can be tricky to do. This week, pick one (or more) situation in your life that you need to make a decision on this month, and do a situation-action-outcome reading on it. The goal here is to get clarity and give our intuition (or spiritual guidance) a voice even in the midst of uncertainty and anxiety and big emotions.

Bag of Bones Playing CardsI chose to allow the cards to choose the situation discussed in the reading.  Therefore, the cards pulled for “situation” are used to describe the situation that becomes the topic of the reading as a whole.

Situation No. 1

SituationTwo of Spades atop Ten of Hearts – Struggling with decision-making when it comes to working on my emotional growth. I’m so used to using logic and discounting my emotions that sometimes it’s extremely difficult for me to allow my emotions to filter into the decision making process. This means that I end up stuck and stagnant rather than moving forward. This is a problem I struggled with through the summer months and feels… unfinished.

ActionTwo of Clubs – Taking the time to plan and strategize rather than just ignoring the problem or moving forward without a plan. I haven’t quite figured out how to do this yet.  I think it has to do with making sure I’m focusing on where I want to go, though, instead of becoming distracted by that feeling of lack of progress and ending up stuck there.

OutcomeKing of Diamonds – Taking control of my goals and being able to accomplish them from the rooted place of a stable foundation.  The King of Diamonds indicates that allowing my emotions to have a say in my decision making process won’t steer me off track regardless of the fact it feels like it might.

Situation No. 2

SituationTen of Clubs – Overburdening myself is a situation that I find myself in a lot.  Like… A LOT.  Although, this summer I did make a few changes that seemed to help a good deal with my cycles of burnout and recovery.I managed to make it through all of the summer without a single burnout episode, actually, which is kind of unheard of.   But now with the holiday rush upon me, I know that the old tendency to burn myself out until I’m not just overburdened but no longer able to function is on the rise.

ActionNine of Diamonds – Pretending everything is all right and good and that I’m in a good place instead of looking at the problem.  This is my main way of functioning through discomfort, whether that discomfort is pain or exhaustion, or any other number of situations.  The problem is?  When I do this it creates a well of closeted and walled off emotions, because I have to numb my insides for it to work.

OutcomeFour of Hearts – Delays due to dejection are the results of this unhealthy way of dealing with my tendency to overburden myself.  As I am susceptible to clinical depression, dejection is not a safe thing for me as it allows the slope down into the pit of depression to become slippery, and the more slippery that slope becomes then the faster and easier I slide down into the pit.  This reading is a warning about what not to do… and what to watch out for.

DECK USED: BAG OF BONES PLAYING CARDS

What Do Your Readings Look Like?

I think you might have already read my response to this question, but I liked it and I wanted to include it here.

What do some of your readings look like? Do you go back and forth with the querent? Do you try breaking down their questions and reforming them if they feel a bit off? Do you go in and just see how it feels doing multiple pulls for a question?

Tarotholics Tarot Discussion Prompt via Discord on 11/7

When reading for others, I read in a variety of different styles. Keep in mind I am mute, so when I say I am “talking” to someone it means I’m either typing words out in response on a device, using a text-to-speech app, or writing things down by hand for communication purposes. This slows down the process so what was once a 10 minute reading back when I had a voice is now about a 30 minute reading or more.

In Person Read then Discuss – In this method, I have a client face to face that comes to me with a question. They give me the information they want me to know and I draw cards to answer this question, and any additional rephrasing I might have that I want to add to the reading for clarification purposes. I do not look at the querent as I pull these cards, but instead I focus my attention on the cards until they are all laid out.

I take a few notes, then use either hand written, typed on a screen, or text-to-voice to convey the message of the cards in detail. Once that is done, I ask if they need clarification on anything, and if so, we talk about it and I might draw another card or two.

In Person – Free Form – Again, a face to face client sits down and we begin to talk about a situation or event that they need some clarity on. In this method, ass we talk I will continuously overhand shuffle the cards. Each time a card pops out of the deck, we pause the conversation and I use the card to help direct where the conversation goes and provide needed answers and advice.

When the discussion starts to circle back on itself, it’s an indication that we’ve reached the end of what the cards can give, and I ask if they need any further clarity. If they say yes, I might draw a card or two more if it is needed (or recap what has already been said if new cards are not needed), and then close things out.

Online – Read then Discuss – In this method, my client contacts me through digital means (usually through email or purchasing a reading off my website) and can share as little or as much of their situation as they want, as well as the purpose of the reading. From there, I draw cards based (usually) upon how many cards they’ve paid for being drawn (sometimes I draw more, which I don’t charge for).

I type out the interpretation of the cards and I send the reading to them including a picture of the cards, and give them the opportunity to ask for clarification on anything involved in the reading if needed. Said clarification may come with an extra drawn card or two, or may simply need to be a recap / rephrase of what the cards have already said.

Online – Free Form – I usually save this particular method for friends and clients that I still have that I’ve had since prior to losing my voice. Especially since the pandemic, as face to face readings are not as easy to manage these days.

This method is done using instant messages, texts, DMs or other instant messaging type of method, we talk about what’s going on with them and between my replies while they are typing and while I’m reading, I shuffle cards and allow cards to pop out to provide guidance, advice, and answers.

Like an in person free-form reading, this is a discussion. I take pics of the cards along the way and send them to my client/friend as we go.

When the discussion either circles back or starts to peter out, it means the reading is then drawing to an end and I make sure they don’t need clarification on anything. I then send them a picture of their full reading with all of the cards on the table to close things out.