Where Do You Go?

/ Twist the Leaf / 2 Comments

In a previous post, I mentioned a type of meditation where I visit a safe place within my mind.   I thought in this post I would take some time to describe what and where this place is.

cabin

My personal inner space has not changed throughout my entire life since I first discovered this method of visualization and meditation.  That is not to say that qualities of the place haven’t changed, but the foundation is the same regardless of some of the trappings.    It is not a real place in the physical world, but rather it is a fantasy that is real only in my mind.   Within my mind, it has depth and breadth, though.  It goes through the seasons in time with the real world as well, and has been built over decades into a place that is not just a safe and secure place, but is a feast for all of the senses.

Deep in the forest, high in the mountains is a single level home made of earth and trees.

A winding road leads the way up to this part of the forest, and there is a small turn off where you pull in and park.  From there, you must hike the rest of the way in.  Grocery and package deliveries are the way most supplies come in, and at the end of the small turn off, there is a large lock box for the deliveries to be set in to keep them safe from weather and animals until I can come to pick them up.

The forest is like the rainforests of my home, thick and wet, filled with draping moss and lichen and the damp smell of decay and growth.  It is filled with lush ferns and trees of cedar, spruce, pine, and douglas fir.

Once you arrive, what you find is a cabin.  Log cabin style, it sits in a clearing in the middle of the woods. As you step out of the trees, the cabin is in a cleared spot of land, a river just beyond the house trailing away through a valley between towering peaks in the distance.

Surrounding the house is a yard  contained by a picket fence lined with a variety of herbs and plants and an arbor type of gate in the front.  There is a large tree with a swing, and in the side yard there are laundry lines for hanging clothes to dry.   On the other side of the house, nearest the river, there is a large fenced-in garden where I grow vegetables and other edibles.

At the back of the house is an attached conservatory/greenhouse much like the one in the movie Practical Magic, although that is where the resemblance with the movie ends.  Entering the house through the conservatory, there is a kitchen with gas stove and modern fridge, a large farmhouse style sink and plenty of cabinets.  Sometimes there is an island as well, other times there’s a large kitchen table instead.

It is an open floor plan, and the living room is comfortable, the interior a combination of dark wood and muted earthy colors joined with soft lines combined with hard surfaces.   Clean.  Organized.  Fragrant with seasonal scents and wood.  There is an open wood burning stonework fireplace, and large windows that look out at the river and valley in the distance.  The ceiling is high with exposed beams.

All of these things are the same, and have remained the same for many, many years.  There are things that change though, much like the alternating kitchen table and/or kitchen island.

These include whether the laundry lines at the side of the house are parallel or an “umbrella” style. Whether the tree with the swing is inside the yard, or outside of the yard.  Whether or not there is a small dock at the edge of the river. The size of the cleared land that the house sets on, as sometimes the trees of the forest are quite close, and other times they are further back.

I rarely ever see the bedroom in this house, and thus I can’t really say if much changes there, but in the kitchen sometimes the appliances change, or the equipment within the house such as the stereo, television, computers, etc will change. Whether or not there is a library or the living room is lined in books has also changed a number of times over the years. And the seasons…. the seasons always change with the seasons in reality.

These are not conscious choices, but  rather appear to happen depending on what I am needing at the time I retreat into this place. Funny enough?  My boots in this place are always the same. Not sure why I notice this, but I do.

And there you have my safe place. That place I retreat to when everything becomes too much, or I need a “time out” to just breathe. There are no photos shared in this post, because this place is purely imaginary and honestly?  I couldn’t find any photos that could do it justice.

 

Project Strength

/ Twist the Leaf / 1 Comment

Today’s meditation was ten minutes long and focused on getting in touch with one’s compassion for yourself and for others.

To be entirely honest?  I wasn’t listening.  I was drifting on my breath and very much in my own space throughout the meditation and I missed the message entirely other than a few snippets about projecting compassion first upon yourself, then out into the world.

Today’s draw is the Six of Flame, which is traditionally a representation of vitality, cooperation and harmony as well as “humanity issues and limitations” in relation to one’s ambitions, passions, drive, and willpower.  This card often comes up in relation to success, both private achievements and public recognition, self confidence, and at times, over confidence and ego.

That is not so much what I feel from this card, although there is a hint of it in the above.  I see a lamb in wolf’s clothing, tail tucked between the legs as they move through the night. I see the moon smiling.  I feel that today this card is more about taking time for yourself and watching your back as you show the world a display of strength regardless of how vulnerable the insides may feel.

Sometimes in life you have to put on the wolf’s clothing just to make it through the day, and sometimes you have to do it to get through what’s coming.  That is what I see here.

I am coming up on a trip that is going to be somewhat unpleasant.  I know this.  And I know I need to be in a place of strength when I go.  This card is telling me that even if I feel small, I can still project that powerful outer shell.

There has been a creeping trepidation coming in as the time to go gets closer and closer.  Today’s card is a reassurance that I am strong and I will make it through.  I may need a bit of adaptation, I may need to present a bit of a facade along the way… but the moon smiles in the sky and I will make it through.

Deck Used: Stolen Child Tarot

 

Resourcing Supplies

/ Twist the Leaf / 1 Comment

This week’s question from the Pagan Perspective YouTube channel is a three-in-one, all of which deal with how you resource the supplies you use in your faith and/or craft.

pp01

From Jay Jackson:

“I was wondering about the group’s different takes on using Items that are now mass-produced or that are not naturally occurring for use in their Craftwork or Rituals. For instance you can go down to one of the large camping stores and buy a cauldron or acquire one from one of the various “witchy” stores. Back in the day people usually repurposed a family heirlooms or acquired an old one from an antique store. Some Items that were made by hand are now available off the shelf.”

I really don’t have an issue with this.  For some people, they are limited (sometimes severely so) in their ability to access natural resources, hand-me-down items, antiques and vintage pieces, and other such methods that were once common place.   Sometimes they are financially strapped and mass market is the only way to afford something they feel they want or need.

As long as all paths and venues are represented and none are causing the death of any of the others?  Then I say do what feels right for you.

In my own personal choices, I get a lot of what I need from my hikes in nature, as well as from second hand stores, yard sales, garage sales, etc…. and occasionally thrift stores and dollar stores.   There is also eBay and Etsy, although I usually avoid ordering spellcraft items online whenever possible (especially crystals), as I find I need to touch them in order to make sure the energies they emit are going to blend well with my own or my purpose.

Keep in mind when ordering online that if you are sensitive to energy emissions, you might not be happy with what you receive regardless of how many pictures you see of the item first.  Cleansing can only do so much.  Sometimes?  It’s just not enough.

pp02

(Cont.) From Jay Jackson:

“Also due to modern technology, Laboratory grown Crystals are available. Last year I saw a really beautiful Crystal that was Opalite, I really felt it was ‘calling’ to me, my hopes for the stone were dashed when someone pointed out Opalite is man-made in Labs. I recently acquired one anyway to use as a focal point for a similar item found in Druid Practice but it is unknown what its historic nature was. (A Serpents Egg or Dragon Egg)”

I’m okay with using non-crystal “crystals” in magical practice.  If the item suits your needs and/or you feel it has the energy and qualities you’re looking for to enhance your practice or crafting?  Go for it.  Crystals aren’t the only things in the world that carry energy, so why not?

I do have a HUGE issue with misrepresentation on the side of crystal suppliers.  Whether this is because they don’t know any better, or because they are intentionally being deceptive?  Not okay.

First?  They should know their shit, and if they don’t they shouldn’t be selling crystals.  So that they don’t know what they’re actually selling is NOT an excuse.

Second? Whether it is “accepted in the industry” or not.  Whether it is something “everyone is doing” or not.  Whether it is legal or not.  I don’t give a fuck.  Deceptive practices are still deceptive practices, regardless of the reasons and/or excuses used to justify their use.   And…. IMO?  Not okay.   This includes baking amethyst to then ‘pass it off’ as citrine.  This includes claiming opalite is a stone (it’s glass).  This includes claiming dyed stones are naturally that color.  All of that is deceptive.  Commonly done, but deceptive.

pp04

From Lea McAlister:

“I’m curious what everyone’s thoughts might be in the Sephora Beginner Witch Kits that they [were going to] be selling. It seems like a pretty hot topic with divided opinions everywhere. I would love to know what everyone here thinks. :)”

Cultural Appropriation

noun
  1. the unacknowledged or inappropriate adoption of the customs, practices, ideas, etc. of one people or society by members of another and typically more dominant people or society

I’m pretty sure that says it all where my opinion is concerned.

pp03

From Shadow_sun:

“Favorite budget ideas for spells such as supplies, herbs, or just in general.”

I already mentioned a number of them above.  One of my favorite sources is when I go hiking in nature or take a trip to the beach.  You have to be careful that you are sourcing sustainably, though.  Don’t just take whatever you want, as much as you want, and think it’s okay because it’s “free”.  Be certain that you are not harming the environment or those that live within it by what you decide to take away with you.

Second hand stores, yard sales, garage sales, thrift stores, dollar stores, etc.  All of these are really good for things like supplies and in general.  Estate sales can also be a good place to look for things such as crystals and supplies at a steep discount, although that’s not always the case.

For herbs, my biggest suggestion is to learn how to grow what you need.  This is what I do for sage, lavender, rosemary, and a few other herbs.  I grow them, bundle them (when appropriate), and dry them myself (or freeze them if needed).  You’d be amazed at how much you can get out of a single plant.

Other venues for herbs would be the local grocery store, ethnic markets (ie: Chinatown), bulk food stores, etc.

Craft stores often also are a good place.  They will often have coupons online that you can use to get some pretty steep discounts (such as 20% off an entire order, or 40% off a single item, for example).

You’ll notice I don’t mention metaphysical shops.  This is because I’ve found unless they’re having a spectacular sale or liquidating to close down?  They don’t really have good deals for saving money.  Since this question is all about how to SAVE money, I did not include them.

Nor do I mention Amazon, eBay, or Etsy on this question.   I have found that although you can occasionally find some really good deals from online sites, the results of what you get when your order arrives is a “mixed bag” when it comes to getting what you -expect- to receive. For this reason, I prefer to shop for my spellcrafting supplies in person whenever possible.

 

Wear Waders and Keep Climbing

/ Twist the Leaf / 1 Comment

Today’s meditation was ten minutes and twenty two seconds long, and dealt with healing from shame.

I want to say that the only time  ideal with shame is the kind that comes during my ultra vulnerable moments of the drop, but that’s not entirely true I don’t think.  This is because the meditation today made me wonder if that feeling that I describe as “discomfort” that I still experience concerning the scar on my face isn’t, in fact, shame.

Muffled shame.  Partially healed shame.   But still…. shame.

I’m not entirely sure, to be honest.  But this is the second time in as many months that I’ve wondered this, and so I think it’s something to consider.

I do not agree with the quote given in today’s guided meditation, though.  I do not thin that sharing your shame with a sympathetic and empathetic ear will miraculously make it disappear.  Shame, especially that caused by trauma, just doesn’t heal up that quickly or that easily.  At least, not in my experience.

Today’s draw is the Page of Flame, which is a representation of an receptive omega energy in the area of one’s passions, drive, ambitions, willpower, and inner spark.  This is a card of learning and development, and often comes up in relation to the spark of inspiration, the limitlessness of potential in a person or situation, and sometimes the unnecessary limits we put upon those people or situations.

In my mind, I always see the Page of Wands (Page of Flame in this deck) as a boy with a huge and infectious smile standing proud on a hilltop with a bonfire behind him and sparks flying up into the air around him in all directions.  I’m pretty sure this isn’t from any deck I’ve seen but is, instead, simply my own mental image of that card’s energy.

That said?  I think this deck’s card is a spectacular representation as well.   In this card I see the transformative power of life and positivity.  The caterpillar, the chrysalises, the butterflies in his hair.  The new buds of growing rack reaching up from the top of his head.  The lush carpet of new green sprouts.   All of it speaks to me of a time of newness, transformation, and growth.

I’ve been feeling my inner self trying to shut down and shut itself in over the past few days.  That vulnerable space is starting to get to me.  Perhaps too many drops too close together?   This card points out very clearly that shutting down is happening, and encourages me to keep up the good fight and not to let myself sink into the suck of the mud and muck.

Deck Used: Stolen Child Tarot

 

Unpacking the Chest

/ Twist the Leaf / 1 Comment

Today’s meditation was twenty-five minutes long, and was not a guided meditation.  Instead, I did a retreat into my “mental safe place” for a time.   I will do a post about this in the future to fully describe it for you.

Essentially, though, what this meditation entails is immersing yourself into a daydream.  Specifically, a daydream that you use to find peace and calm.  Your personal paradise, to be exact.      You then spend the time exploring this place, including touching in with all of your senses in the process.

Today’s draw was (instead of IS, because it’s now the very end of the day today) the King of Brine (aka the King of Cups).  This card is traditionally a representation of a projective alpha energy, personality, or person in the area of emotions, creativity, relationships, and intuition.  It follows along the themes of authority, as all the kings do, but in the flavor of diplomacy and emotional balance. Among other things, it can also indicate a time of inner work on the self or that emotional manipulations are afoot.

When I looked at this King of Cups card this morning, what stuck out to me was the baby crocodiles and the delicate shells tucked in the upper and lower corner.  When you think of the crocodile, thoughts of tenderness and nurturing are not usually a part of that equation.  And yet what you see here is delicateness that is existing alongside the “brute” of the full grown croc.

Like most King of Cups cards, the representation in this King of Brine card makes me think of you.  Your power  and your dominant nature, and the tenderness underneath that allows for me to learn and grow in the area where my knowledge and experience is at my weakest… my emotions.

I met you when I was just 19 and when most are just starting out at life.  I’d already been on my own for just over three years and was very much getting my ducks in a row.  But I was emotionally stunted, as I spent the majority of my life closing myself off to my deeper emotions.  You held the key that opened that box I had buried so deeply.

I did not understand the depth of this card when I saw it this morning.  But since then, I’ve done a reading that clarified it much better.  I will include a summary of that reading at the bottom of this post, but suffice to say that the appearance of the King of Brine today is a reminder that your support is there for me whenever I need it, no matter the depth of that need.

The Reading:

I did the #TarotForGrowthSeptember prompt from Instagram.

Question: Where may it be beneficial for me to ask for help?

Reading Summary: There was once a very hard working man that thought he knew everything, but he really still has much to learn in the area of his emotions.

Take Away: This is pretty much the story of me when I met you. I worked hard, and I thought I had everything worked out and under control. Then you arrived and showed me that there was an entire aspect of myself that I’d buried and ignored. Eleven and a half years later, and I’m still unpacking that chest I’d once buried so deeply… and I still need your help to work through it all.

With the series of drops that I’ve been going through lately, and the family matters that are coming up at the end of the month, I’m sure I am very much going to need help emotionally in working through what comes up and learning how to deal with it and balance it all into the rest of my life.

Decks Used: Stolen Child Tarot, Morgan Greer Tarot

 

#11ParanormalQuestions (non) VR to Amethyst Ascension

/ Twist the Leaf / 1 Comment

fantasy-2847724

Another quiz!  Cuz you know how much I like quizzes.  This one is from Amethyst Ascension on YouTube, who answered these questions herself in a live.

1. Do you believe in Aliens?

Yes.  Do I think they are humanoid?  Probably not.  I feel like statistically, there is no possible way there isn’t other life out there.  It may not be  sentient, or maybe it is.  It may not be humanoid, or maybe it is.  It may not be recognizable to US as “life”… but I absolutely do believe there is alien life out there in the universe.

2. Do you recall a past life?

I do not.  I have also never done a past life regression.

3. Do you believe in Mermaids?

I believe in the possibility of mermaids. More than eighty percent of our oceans are unmapped, unobserved, and unexplored.  I feel there is a huge possibility for a great many things lingering out there in the deep beyond our reach.

4. Do you believe in Bigfoot?

Like mermaids, I believe in the possibility of the existence of the Sasquatch. There’s still plenty of places on earth to hide, and for something the size of a man (or perhaps a bit larger?)  That’s a lot of room to roam without being observed.

5. Do you believe in Ghosts?

Absolutely.  I believe in reincarnation, and I believe that sometimes a soul lingers before it continues on into the next cycle.  I believe, also, that sometimes for whatever reason the soul can linger too long and end up stuck.

6. Do you believe in Vampires?

In the Bram Stoker / Anita Blake / Sookie Stackhouse sense?  Not really, no.   I am open to the possibility, though.  IF they exist, I would not be surprised to discover that they are some breed or another of the Fae.

7. Have you ever astral traveled that you remember?

Only in my room looking down upon myself.

8. Have you ever had sleep paralysis?

No.  Never.

9. Do you have any of the 8 psychic Clairs?

Yes, I have a touch of all eight.   I believe that everyone has a touch of all eight, it’s just that the volume is turned up for each of them to different levels in each individual.

For me, clairsentience is the strongest.  That said, I am also an auditory –> tactile/olfactory/gustatory synesthete.  This means that there are a lot of crossed wires in my brain where my hearing is concerned.  Sometimes the resulting experiences can be confused with some of the 8 psychic clairs.

10. Have you ever had a paranormal experience?

Define paranormal?  I’m really not sure how to answer this question, as I don’t really consider ghosts or the psychic clairs, or any of that to be “paranormal”.  Then again…

Comes back after looking up the definition of “Paranormal”, which is defined as… “denoting events or phenomena such as telekinesis or clairvoyance that are beyond the scope of normal scientific understanding”.

Under that definition?  Absolutely.  Many, many times.

11. Have you ever been abducted or contacted by aliens?

Not that I’m aware of.

I could have SWORN she’d also asked about Unicorns, although maybe that was only mentioned in the chat?  Anyway, I’ll answer that one too…

Bonus Question – Do you believe in Unicorns and the Fae?

The Fae…. 100% yes.  I do.  I do not believe that they are all pretty pixie-looking humanoids with gossamer butterfly wings, but I do absolutely believe in the Fae.  I can’t really say why or how I became so certain, but I have no doubt.

Unicorns…. I am of two minds on this one, although, I will say that the answer boils down to a yes either way.   In my opinion, the possibilities is split between 1) unicorns being a breed of the Fae and/or 2) the unicorns are an extinct species of animal.   I don’t really lean more one way or the other, I just logically speaking think it must be one of these.