Home Coming
A welcome home
comes
in the chirrup
and meow
of a little voice
as tiny feet
stomp
on carpeted floors
to exclaim
displeasure
even as the rub
of sleek fur
against ankles
speaks the words
“I missed you so much”
over and over
Today’s meditation was skipped.
Today’s draw is a double with the Nine of Wands atop the Three of Cups. Traditionally, the Nine of Wands is about resilience and boundaries, while the Three of Cups deals with themes to do with social revelry and celebrations.
If the Three of Cups had shown up on to, the message would have been that burdens are lessened when you let others help. But, what we see here with the Ten of Wands on top is that it can at times feel like “to much”.
This last few days have been extremely social, and today’s cards are a reassurance that it’s okay to feel wrung out at the moment. It doesn’t make the visit any less than, or you any less than either. It just means that it’s time for some alone time and rest.
Mr Lionharts’ #TheAprilTarot Animal Guide Challenge Prompt
Questions for The Sun – Day 21
What good has been set in motion since the start of this Journey?
Queen of Pentacles atop Queen of Wands – You have been able to connect more with your motivation and drive, and are now grounded enough to support this drive and see it through. You have the experience to carry yourself forward and support your drive, and the drive to move forward in the ways that matter to you and will help you feel more stable. You are beginning to be able to combine the two and work with them together.
What other good things can contribute to my best Journey?
Ace of Pentacles and Eight of Cups – Using good judgement to know when new opportunities are going to be something worth pursuing, or if you should just walk away. Including being able to identifying when something is too good to be true.
#DiscordTarotholicsApr2022 Challenge Prompt
Questions for April 21st and 23rd
What haunts you?
King of Cups Rx – The fear of losing Gideon. His obsessiveness helps in alleviating this fear, but there is always that niggling worry. That thought that you’ll do something wrong or fuck up in some irreparable way, or that something will happen to him.
What keeps you safe?
Four of Wands – Four walls and a roof over your head. The safety and security of hearth and home creates that sense of safety within you, and gives you safety in turn.
What guides you?
Five of Cups – You are often guided by your pessimistic tendencies and negative inner narrative. You already know this is unhealthy, and how to rectify the problem. It’s important to be aware that it’s happening, though, in order to be reminded that countermeasures are necessary.
I got some time with Gideon, and it was really nice. It’s been a long week and I needed some quiet time with him to help relax some of the “starch” in my collar that all that Emperor energy needed in the previous handful of days.
Beltane Is Coming
New tips
in delicate hues of
sweet and tender
green
reach for a kiss
of sunlight
while being
coated
in raindrops
like a sacred bath
before the ritual
of Beltane’s fires
begin
What emotional baggage am I holding on to too tightly?
Ace of Diamonds – That all of your new ideas for structure and stability are automatically going to fail. That the old ideas and processes are the only thing that will work for you, and thus you’re stuck in this specific rhythm of behavior and methods if you want to succeed.
What aspects of it can I let go of?
Jack of Diamonds – You are not a new hand at this. Let go of the trepidation and pessimistic mindset that can often come when you really want something to work. Just because your negative inner narrative says it will fail doesn’t mean it will. You don’t always have to take these new ideas slow and careful, and feeling things out instead of jumping in without looking first isn’t always the best course.
How do I let go of this baggage?
Three of Hearts – Trust others to provide honest input that can give you a more positive view and confidence that you can leap without looking at every pebble and grain of and first. Allow yourself to open up to new possibilities through the confidence gained by leaning into others thoughts and opinions.
Today’s meditation was skipped (again).
Today’s draw is the Chariot card, which is traditionally a representation of decisive action, control, direction, willpower, and determination that breeds success.
Yesterday I did a reading about how the apartment search is going and the news there was pretty dismal. It has been a bit of a frustrating trip, and the cards lit a fire under my ass and determination in my soul to turn things around.
This morning, I got up early and when the property management places opened, I started organizing the girls to make calls while I did searches on the internet. I made them call every single lead or possibility, no matter how unlikely. I pushed them to be pushy and determined with me, driving them forward to speak to a good 28 different property management companies, while at the same time I looked up each company on the internet so that they would have something to talk to these companies about when they answered. Once that was exhausted, I then started them on calling on owner ran listings and speaking to owners about different properties and leaving messages with others.
And… I think we might have found a place. We went out and looked at it and met the owner, and we are just waiting for him to email the background check (he said tomorrow, so we’ll call tomorrow evening if he hasn’t done it).
Today’s card is a reminder that with will and determination, you can change your fate and shift your trajectory into a different path. Sometimes, it just takes having a clear direction and the determination to drive forward and really work at it.
Mr Lionharts’ #TheAprilTarot Animal Guide Challenge Prompt
Questions for The Moon – Day 20
Where should I listen to my feelings or better honor them?
Seaglass and Daydreaming – Pay attention to your body and mind’s need for rest. Don’t let past judgements from others influence your behavior when it comes to taking the rest and recovery you need. It isn’t the end of the world if you take a nap now and then, nor going to bring down the “whole house of cards” if you take a break now and then.
Where are my feelings actually not helpful right now?
Peony and Moonflight – That rest and ambition can’t mix, as if it’s an either/or situation instead of something that can be balanced to have both. This is bred out of the fears briefly mentioned above, and the insistence of others in my life while I was growing up that things could only be accomplished and done well if you put your all into the endeavor with single focus and determination (and sometimes not even then).
#DiscordTarotholicsApr2022 Challenge Prompt
Philosophical Question: What existed before our universe was created?
Reading Summary: There was an element of give and take that lead in time to perfect balance (Six of Pentacles), which then in turn bred boredom and dissatisfaction (Five of Cups). From this boredom grew a need to explore and experiment (The Travelers), which led to the creation of our universe.
Take Away: These cards indicate that before our universe was a give and take of energy seeking balance, and eventually finding it.
Then sentience. Perhaps it didn’t start out as that, but it eventually came to be sentience in one form or another.
Balance and sentience do not mix well, as there is boredom there, and thus chaos and creation stepped in to upset the balance and create the universe… and us.
Again, even with all that was going on today, I managed a nap. A much needed nap.
The Shell
Solid and strong
I slip from tender
to flexed and knotted
in a matter
of moments
and yet the path
back to tender
and vulnerable
takes so much longer
as falling apart
is far more difficult
than holding it together
and pretending that
everything is okay
Twisting the Leaf 