The Joy of MDEs

I went to the shrink today.   I have been dealing with a pretty deep depression over the past… month?  Month and a half?

I don’t really remember March at all, or most of April thus far.

She has encouraged me to talk to Gideon about monitoring my emotions so that next time I fall into the hole of a Major Depressive Episode, we can try upping my meds briefly to pull me back out.  I’m not sure if it’ll work or make things worse, but if I’m already in an MDE anyway, I figure that it’s worth a try.    There is the risk that the med fluxuation could stir up suicidal thoughts and urges, but if we don’t at least try it, we won’t know.

She also wants me to do a daily meditation in the morning, complete with positive affirmation that I am to meditate on, then try to keep in mind throughout the rest of the day.    I’ve never done affirmations before, so… that will be something new and different.

I suck at “daily” type stuff and getting that kind of stuff to “stick” into my routine, but I’m going to give it a try.

It’s too late to up my meds this time around, as I’m already crawling out of the MDE’s black hole, but maybe with a plan in place, my next one won’t end up stealing 4-6 weeks from me with no memory and (apparently) everything non-essential put on pause during that time.

3 thoughts on “The Joy of MDEs

  1. I love you, precious.

    I know it’s a very long, hard climb out, but you’ll get there. And hopefully with a plan in mind for next time, we can prevent future dips from turning into drops to the bottom.

    I love you, man. Now and always. Fucking always.

    Liked by 1 person

  2. Good post here. One thing I’d like to say is the fact that most professional areas consider the Bachelor Degree like thejust like the entry level standard for an online education. When Associate Diplomas are a great way to begin, completing your current Bachelors opens up many good opportunities to various employment goodies, there are numerous on-line Bachelor Course Programs available by institutions like The University of Phoenix, Intercontinental University Online and Kaplan. Another concern is that many brick and mortar institutions offer you Online types of their certifications but usually for a considerably higher amount of money than the providers that specialize in online diploma plans.


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