Look Up… Keep Going

IMG_0229Today’s meditation was just over twelve minutes long and was another of the shorter guided meditations on the Calm app, which I paired with an interval timer for my piriformis stretches.

The focus of today’s meditation was about how sometimes we hurt ourselves more by struggling against pain and unpleasantness than we would by just going with the flow.  It is how, for example, if you were to step on an animal trap and it went off and caught your leg. The initial pain is bad enough, but then you begin to thrash and struggle in its grip and in the process cause yourself more pain and more damage.

In this way, sometimes when we resist change or fight against experiences that we don’t like or that hurt us in some way, we end up causing more pain to ourselves than if we had just taken a moment to pause and breathe through it.

Tarot of the Sevenfold Mystery and Thera-Pets Emotional Support Animal CardsToday’s draw is the Ace of Swords, which is traditionally a representation of seedling spark of new ideas, new aspirations, new educational pursuits, and new interests.

What really stands out to me in the imagery of this card is the spade on the sleeve of the arm holding the sword.  It’s such a small thing, and yet this tiny detail adds another element to this card that resonates with me.  The reason for this is in cartomancy, the Ace of Spade often represents death and the process of something in your life having to “slough off” to make way for something new.  Normally this is something I would associate with the Ten of Swords, but here we see the cycle that begins after that death is complete.  The new opportunity to do things different… to do them better this time around.

When combined with the Thera-Pets card for today, what I see here is a reminder that each day is a new day.  An opportunity.   Each day you can be better than you were the day before.  Each day you can find a different way, a new way, to approach the day and the struggles that lie before you.  Instead of looking down at the ground, remember to look up (based off the rays in the sky in the Ace). Keep your chin up and keep going.

DECK USED:  TAROT OF THE SEVENFOLD MYSTERY AND THERA-PETS EMOTIONAL SUPPORT ANIMAL CARDS

LionHart’s Whispering Woods Tarot Challenge Prompt
Question
: In what way am I asked to nurture or replenish myself?

Whimsical Tarot

 Reading Summary:  Slow down (Empress over the Devil).  Your enthusiasm for your addictions (Queen of Rods and The Devil) are being spurred to greater heights by the reawakening of your emotions (Knight of Cups).

Take Away:  It’s time to do a bit of financial replenishment.  Although this doesn’t mean cutting out on decks entirely, it does mean that it’s time to slow down a bit.  Don’t allow emotions to drive your pleasures and addictions over the line into being unhealthy.   This isn’t just about decks, but covers the crap ass food you’ve been eating as well.  This is not good for you either in excess.

Although broken down through these four cards, this could have been communicated just as easily by handing over the Temperance card. The cards broke it down to make sure that the message couldn’t be misconstrued.

DECK USED:  WHIMSICAL TAROT

#DiscordTarotolicsMar2021 Challenge Prompt
Question
: What are my strengths when dealing with others?

Tarot of the Sevenfold MysteryReading Summary: I am clever (Seven of Swords), passionate (Queen of Wands) and easy to learn from (Lady of Pentacles).

Take Away: I am extremely biased and blind when looking at myself and how I am perceived by others.  What they see is not at all what I see, and in this manner, I can’t tell if these cards are accurate or not. 

That said, what I see here in these cards is that I have a grounded energy that make me approachable to others and easy to learn off of even by those that are not in my life to learn from me.  A part of this is because I appear cunning and clever, which stirs up people’s interest, and because I am well seated in my passions and experienced in them.  The latter gives me the ability to speak on these things with authority and passion, sparking the interest and inspiration in others as a result.

DECK USED:  TAROT OF THE SEVENFOLD MYSTERY

Daily Self Kindness

I have been wanting to experiment with a new idea for reading cards, and in order to do that I needed to have some people to test out my idea on.   I’ve been putting it off because of my recovery, but I’ve been eager to give it a go.  Today I gave out a number of free readings (nine, to be exact) in order to test the readability of my idea.  Out of the nine test readings performed, I only had one that was hit-or-miss, and I think that was less about the cards and more about difficulty connecting with that person’s energy. I would consider this test a success, and I enjoyed it.

Slow Awakenings… and Impatience

IMG_0205Today’s meditation was was just over ten minutes long and I returned to the Calm app today for one of the guided meditations, with my interval timer added in for my pirifromis stretching.

The focus of today’s meditation was about living in the moment, even when the moment sucks. I agree that sometimes you just have to allow yourself to experience what’s happening, but I don’t think it should keep us from improving our situation when its possible to do so.   It’s a delicate balance.

Tarot de Marseille-Waite and Thera-Pets Emotional Support Animal CardsToday’s draw is the High Priestess, which is traditionally a representation of the subconscious, intuition, inner awareness, spiritual knowledge, and the possession of secret knowledge. 

What stands out to me the strongest in the imagery of this card is the curtain behind the priestess.  A curtain that hides what lies beyond.  The Priestess knows what is there, but like the beaded curtain in a fortune teller’s shop, only she knows what lies on the other side.

Combined with the Thera-Pets card for the day, what I see here is a reminder that I’m still in recovery.  During an MDE, my intuition is often stilted and muffled.  This can become really frustrating, especially now in the process of recovery, where I feel like I -could- be or -should- be fully recovered… but I’m not yet.

The reminder here is that it takes the time it takes.  My intuition isn’t going anywhere, nor does it become “rusty” with disuse during these times when I’m stuck in the MDE. Patience is needed, and it’s okay for things to move slowly.

DECK USED:  TAROT AND THERA-PETS EMOTIONAL SUPPORT ANIMAL CARDS

LionHart’s Whispering Woods Tarot Challenge Prompt
Question
: Where am I welcomed to take a break and gather myself?

Walter & Fitzpatrick inspired Harmonious Tarot

 Reading Summary:  You don’t have to charge forward (Knight of Wands) with your eye on the prize (Two of Wands) and coming out on top (King of Swords) as you are standing up for what you believe is right. (Seven of Wands).

Take Away:  Sometimes just living your life the way that is right for you and following your own moral compass is enough. It doesn’t always have to be about saving the world or going somewhere.  It doesn’t have to be about winning or losing or conflict.   It’s okay to just live by example sometimes, and that can be enough.

DECK USED:  WALTER & FITZPATRICK INSPIRED HARMONIOUS TAROT

#DiscordTarotolicsMar2021 Challenge Prompt
Question
: How can I better handle conflict?

Tarot de Marseille-WaiteReading Summary:  Take a pause (Trois de Bâton Rx). 

You need to approach from a place of stability and comfort (Quatre de Bâton) where you can then linger (Trois de Bâtons Rx) and view your choices more clearly (L’Amoureux).

Take Away: Sometimes, when conflict is upon us, we react in the moment…. even when there are times when we know that we shouldn’t.  Emotions running high and BAM, out of the blue your mouth opens and something unintended comes out, or we clam up and flinch away, or we act without thought and do something we regret as a result. 

The cards here are indicating that in order to better handle conflict, it is wise to take  a step back and find your balance and calm.  Put yourself in a place of comfort and calm where you can look at things from many perspectives, and with a level head, choose the response that will be best for you. 

DECK USED:  TAROT DE MARSEILLE WAITE

Daily Self Kindness

I made sure to structure my time so that I didn’t have to pull another all-nighter like I did Monday night.  That shit was ridiculous and I want to actually sleep tonight.

Fostering Forward Movement

Today’s meditation was skipped because I was tired and ended up sleeping instead. I very much need to get back into doing this daily, but… yeah.  Today wasn’t it.

Harmony Tarot and Thera-Pets Emotional Support Animal CardsToday’s draw is the Four of Autumn.  This is not a tarot card, and the meanings on these cards are not cohesive with a tarot system.  I wasn’t aware of this when I purchased the deck (because, hello, the word “tarot” is in the title yeah?) but this deck is an oracle deck.

(Mini-rant about marketing ploys now over.)

Right, so.  The Four of Autumn is about a time of healing from a mental health ailment, distressing situation, or conflict.  It carries elements of the Four of Cups within it’s meaning in that there is a need to step back from others in order to heal, and a bit of the Seven of Pentacles in that  this healing can take a bit of time to develop and patience to bring into fruition.  It is about acceptance of where you are and taking time to yourself to find your focus and where you want to go.

When combined with the Thera-Puts card for today, the message is that sometimes when you’re working on healing from difficult times or circumstances, it can feel like it’s taking forever and the progress can sometimes feel so slow that you wonder if you’re ever going to actually heal fully at all.  Patience can be a hard thing, especially when stuck somewhere that is unpleasant.  The message here is to take a breath and practice that patience, accept it’s going to take some time yet, and do what you need to do to foster that forward movement towards a healthier you.

DECK USED:  HARMONY TAROT AND THERA-PETS EMOTIONAL SUPPORT ANIMAL CARDS

LionHart’s Whispering Woods Tarot Challenge Prompt
Question
: How can I nurture my dreams into full growth over the next few months?

Gregory Scott Tarot

 Reading Summary:  In times of struggle (Three of Swords) and strife (5 of Swords) make sure that you are focusing on finding balance and connection with the earth and your spiritual self (Temperance).

Take Away:  This message is a re reiteration of my COTD for today.  It’s a reminder that sometimes you need to take a step back and pause… breathe… focus on finding your balance and the connections that help you find solid ground within yourself.  This is especially important when dealing with times of struggle and strife.  In order to nurture my dreams over the next few months, this is a lesson that I will need to keep in mind.  Don’t allow the crappy shit to keep you from doing what you need to do to feel balanced, complete, and connected.

DECK USED:  GREGORY SCOTT TAROT

#DiscordTarotolicsMar2021 Challenge Prompt
Philosophical Question
: Why do we dream?

Harmony Tarot (Oracle)Reading Summary: To rise above and improve upon ourselves (Nine of Winter), find happiness and acknowledge those things we take pleasure in in our lives (Le Soleil), and to seek out truth in those people and things around us (Two of Summer).

Take Away:  The answer here is that dreams are to give us something to strive for, something to grow towards, and a way to connect with the world around us in healthy ways that will make us happier and healthier. 

If you don’t have dreams to strive for, then the stagnancy of where you are without the drive and desire to move forward, will cement you in place and allow decay to begin to take root with you.  Our dreams are the drive that keep this unhealthy stagnancy from happening.

DECK USED:  HARMONY TAROT

Daily Self Kindness

I took a nap when I really didn’t want to.  I’m a little frustrated at being more tired lately than usual, but I’m trying to be accepting and understanding of this, and allowing myself a bit more rest to help in perhaps healing whatever it is that’s keeping me from the full energy I usually have at my disposal.

Morning Bonus Read – The Next Step

Next Step Tarot Spread - Odissea Minerva Playing Cards

Specific Situation:  Wednesday’s car accident.

What’s my next step?
Queen of Hearts

Take control but do it in a way that allows for some softness and warmth to enter into the equation.  There’s no signs at this time that you need to be a hardass, so just keep an eye on things and allow yourself time to heal… and allow Gideon a chance to get his anxiety over needing to put you in a protective ball ease up.

What do I have to change?
Six of Diamonds

Don’t make excuses for others and don’t allow people to walk all over you. There’s a difference between being generous, and being a pushover.  Make sure you’re on the right side of the line when dealing with this issue and others involved in the process.

How can i change this?
Seven of Spades

Be clever.  Be watchful. Pay attention and make sure everything is on par and moving along smoothly.  Don’t be a doormat or a pushover.  You don’t need to be aggressive, you just need to make sure you’re keeping an eye on things. Like that saying about door locks not keeping out the truly determined, but dissuading the tempted.

What do I have to continue doing?
Ace of Hearts

Make sure you are being kind to yourself and giving yourself gentle encouragement. Stay focused on the emotional education you are working towards and don’t get frustrated or discouraged.

How my life will change as a result of this next step.
Eight of Hearts

Things will change and move forward, but in keeping the advice above in mind, that movement will be in a positive direction. At times things might be frustrating or discouraging, but keep in mind that’s a part of the process and is temporary as long as you are staying on top of things and doing your due diligence.

DECK USED:  ODISSEA MINERVA PLAYING CARDS

Slow Is Still a Go

There was no meditation today because yet again the guys across the street were making a hell of a racket.  It wasn’t just the machinery, which I could probably have found a way to ignore, but rather… it was the yelling.  I swear to fuck they all talk at full volume.  Maybe they all have earplugs in their ears and have to shout just to be heard by each other.  I wonder if they realize that the entire condo complex across the alley from them can hear every word they say as well.

Cat-Rot Tarot 2020 Edition and Thera-Pets Emotional Support Animal CardsToday’s draw is the Three of Wands, which is traditionally a representation of taking the first steps in the direction you want to go after the planning of the Two of Wands has been accomplished. This particular “travel card” in the tarot has to do with going after what sparks your interest, and stirs up your innovation and inspiration.

What stands out to me the strongest in the imagery of this card is the fact that the cat looks kind of like a slug in this card.  If it weren’t for the ears… it would kind of look like a snail carrying its shell on its back, yeah?   Okay, so at least that’s what it looks like to me.

The significance of seeing a snail in this imagery has to do with speed and the fact that sometimes?  Forward movement is enough. This is reinforced in the Thera-Pets card for today, and the two cards together are a reminder that as long as you are heading in the direction you want to go?  It’s okay to not be moving at full speed ahead.  Taking your time is okay.

DECK USED:  CAT-ROT TAROT 2020 EDITION AND THERA-PETS EMOTIONAL SUPPORT ANIMAL CARDS

LionHart’s Whispering Woods Tarot Challenge Prompt
Question
: In what area of my life can I use a positive (energy) boost right now?

Lazy Crow Tarot

 Reading Summary:  I need to work on worrying less (Nine of Swords) and being more open (Page of Cups) to the love and camaraderie (Three of Cups) found in my home these days (Four of Wands).

Take Away: Okay so… it’s true that I have a really odd sense of humor. There’s a lot of jokes and humor that I just don’t understand at all, and there’s a lot of things I find amusing that others find not to be amusing at all. This factor doesn’t help in this situation, but that doesn’t mean I can’t be more open to allowing lighthearted warmth in that L and Z have to offer, instead of ignoring it for the stresses and worries going on in my head.

DECK USED:  LAZY CROW TAROT

#DiscordTarotolicsMar2021 Challenge Prompt
Question
: What would be a better way to deal with my anxieties that will allow my feet to stay on the ground?

Cat-Rot Tarot 2020 EditionReading Summary:  All the tricks and tools in the world (The Magician), clever ideas, and experience under your belt (Queen of Swords) is not going to get you outside and in nature like you need (The Empress).  Just do it (Two of Pentacles) and you will feel better for it (Five of Pentacles Rx)

Side Note: This deck has a somewhat oddly unique way of speaking that takes a bit of getting used to. I noticed this as well with the other edition of the Cat-Rot Tarot.

Take Away: In order to deal with my anxieties in a better and more grounded manner I need to make sure I’m literally getting out in nature and grounding. In doing this, I am able to feel more balanced and less as if I’m fighting a loosing battle all the time.  All of my “clever” excuses and sneaky ways of putting this grounding and connection to nature off are doing me absolutely no good at all.

DECK USED:  CAT-ROT TAROT 2020 EDITION

Daily Self Kindness

Although I was tired, I took some time after play with Gideon just to sit with him quietly and soak in some one on one time. The drop is toying with me and I needed it.

Ostara 2021 – Spring Equinox

Tomorrow is the Spring Equinox, which is considered by many to be the first day of Spring, and is one of only two moments in the year when the sun is exactly above the Equator and day and night are of equal length. After this day, the brightness of daylight begins to overtake the dark hours in the sky as the days continue to longer and longer, and the nights shorter and shorter.  This transition is the basis within the celebration of the holiday itself, as we celebrate the warming and awakening of the earth as she prepares to share her abundance and generosity with us all.

In my path, the Spring Equinox is also known as Ostara.  Although this holiday is celebrated (as Easter around) the world by those that embrace many traditions that originated in Paganism, most don’t realize the full and rich history that this holiday holds.

Spring Equinox Tarot Reading

Like with new moons and full moons, I usually do a spread to check in with myself and give myself some direction for the next couple of months for each solstice, equinox, and other Sabbats. This spread is an adaptation of my Self Care Saturday spread, so there are sure to be  some similarities in how it is read. The focus of this spread, though, is not about Self Care, but rather about progress and my path. The time period is also longer, reaching through the next handful of weeks until the celebration of the upcoming Beltane at the beginning of May.

Theme of the Season – Spring Equinox, First Quarter Moon, Equisetum Arvense –

Spring Equinox is a time of growth and the thriving energy of a rebirth that began with the passing of Imbolc at the beginning of February. Where during that time seeds began to awaken in the earth as the soil begins to thaw and the sun’s rays begin to warm away the bite of winter, with Ostara we now find ourselves seeing outward signs of spring’s arrival with the appearance of small buds forming on trees and the first flowers of spring sprouting from the earth.  Nourishment from the sun and the rains will further encourage this growth, creating a thriving reawakening as spring moves forward into full swing.

The First Quarter Moon is a time of building energy and action.  If you haven’t already begun, now is the time to begin taking action on the intentions and goals that were planted in the fertile soil of the new moon’s energy. This is true in the metaphysical realm just as it is true in the physical, and farmers often find the time between the new moon and first quarter to be both fertile and wet, making it ideal for planting above ground crops, transplanting, and doing grafts. With the season being what it is, now is the first of two spring half moons where this energy is not just available but abundant this spring.

Equisetum arvense (Common Horsetail) is an herb that is well known for its antioxidant qualities, as well as for renewal and restoration of bones, fingernails, and hair, as it contains silica, which is a compound that helps the body absorb calcium.  It is often used magically in anti-aging spells, as well as reinforcing promises and strengthening boundaries.

When looking at these three cards together, the theme that I see here is a reminder to stay true to the path that I want to continue upon.  This is a reminder that I’ve gotten from the cards a few times recently and in this spread it’s a reminder that in moving forward, I will continue to need to be cautious and conscious of where I direct my energy so that it is directed into the growth I want to happen and not falling back on old habits.

Earth – The Sun – Take care of yourself.  Make your body happy and everything else will fall into place. Nourish your body with good foods, give it the rest it needs, and visit those places you find enjoyable and recuperative often. These things encourage positivity and will help you in staying healthy and happy.  In turn, that energy will then spread outward from there into other parts of your life.

Air – Queen of Wands – Not everything is about progress.  Make sure you are paying attention to the little things and not discounting them as unimportant or irrelevant. They are the marrow of the bones of life, so make sure that you are not taking these things for granted. When you put yourself in a position of control over the choices you make and the things you pursue, you give yourself the ability to fit into your life those things that are truly important.  Make sure you fit in lots and lots of those “little things” that mean so much.

Water – Knight of Wands – Go forth in this direction, for this is the way forward. My emotional growth was a good deal of my focus through most of the year last year, and this year that focus needs to continue in that same direction. There is much more to learn and explore.  Don’t allow other passions and interests to pull you off your chosen course (indicated in the rearing up of the buck).

Fire – Four of Swords – The business, represented as the lions share of your Wands position in your life, is not going anywhere and it’ll thrive just fine in neutral.  Will it explode and expand?  No, but you’ve already grown to a point that is hard to manage without help.  Just how much bigger do you really want to get? Lay down your arms and don’t fucking push for now.  Allow yourself to rest (in this area of your life) while there’s the opportunity to do so.

Waning – Rest – While it may be time to set down your arms in the area of the business for the time being, don’t let this fool you into thinking there isn’t anything to do.  There’s plenty to do and plenty to explore, just not in that particular area of your life right now. Don’t be seduced into slacking off.  Your recovery from the MDE and your endeavors for growth and spirituality both require you to keep moving forward.

Waxing – The Priestess – “The betterment of ourselves lies in our actions, and in lessons drawn from our experiences” are words that resonated when I read the artist’s notes on this card. Here we see the culmination of what is coming and where focus needs to lie on the path forward. Pay attention to how things feel, both emotionally and through intuition.  Allow this side of you to stretch and flourish while the slave driver of practical matters takes a step back.

Take Away – This reading is about choices and trajectory, and making sure I make the choices that steer me in the direction I want to go, instead of just taking the easy way out, or falling back on bad habits or old ways of doing things. Right now, as I emerge from the last dregs of the MDE, I have the opportunity to course correct my path forward, adjust my trajectory, and direct my energy in directions far more attuned to what I want to do, where I want to go, and who I want to be… and become.

DECKS USED:  WENDY ANDREW ART CARD, PAGAN OTHERWORLDS TAROT, COMPENDIUM OF WITCHES ORACLE, HEALING HERBAL CARDS VOL 1 & 2