Today’s meditation was unfortunately interrupted by the call from the technician that came by to fix out internet.  Instead of finishing, I got up to discover that my webhost was also offline, and thus I had to get on the phone with them as well.  I had planned to try again after the technician left, but first I was on the phone with the webhost for at least an hour (on hold… the fix took like 6 minutes). Then the technician was here for a couple hours or more.  And then once he left, I discovered that the guy had accidentally ripped the wall shelf out of the wall that holds the modem and had to remount that, then re-configure the security camera… and on the whole it was just a clusterfuck and I didn’t manage to get my meditation in after all. SO… I will try to do that tonight before bed.
Today’s draw is the Eight of Wands, which is traditionally a representation of movement and fast paced action. It’s about movement and decisive action that carries you forward.
That traditional meaning for the Eight of Wands makes the imagery of the card in this deck very interesting. For, in this imagery, you see a woman in repose. A break taken, rest to be had…. and yet look at all of the surroundings in which she rests. It is busy. Bees are busy building their nest, ants explore her skin. Weeds and plants both sprout up and grow tall and strong, supporting a restless gathering of birds above, and among those weeds and earthen rocks, Fae ponies dance.
She may be resting… but life continues to march on.  And that is the message I see in the imagery of this card today.Â
The message is that you don’t have to poke and prod and push 24/7, always on the ball and always pushing and shoving to keep things moving. Life keeps moving, even when you step aside to take a little break and a bit of a rest. Stop worrying so much that when you take your self-care time and those little rests you need, that everything is going to fall apart because you are not currently at the helm with both hands on the wheel.
DECK USED:Â HUSH TAROT
#Zentember #LovelyHealing Challenge Prompt
Question: What’s shaking my confidence?
Reading Summary: I worry that the actions have taken (King of Swords) against my mother (Queen of Swords) are going to come back and bite me in the ass somehow (Justice).
Take Away: This was actually a really surprising reply to the question. Not that it’s inaccurate, because it is definitely true. Just that… it wasn’t where I thought the cards would go.
It is true that I have some confidence issues when it comes to my mother at the moment. Although the guilt over my stunt in February has faded away, there remains this feeling that things are not finished in that arena, just on hold due to the pandemic. They won’t be on hold forever, and like I mentioned in one of my readings yesterday? That pendulum always has to swing back eventually.
DECK USED:Â TAROT LEAVES
#DiscordTarotholicsSep2020 Challenge Prompt
Topic: Do Spread #2
Wolf – Ace of Swords – In order to encourage strength and bravery for the hurdles yet to come this fall, I need to make sure that I am capable of approaching these hurdles and challenges with a clear head. This means making sure I get the rest I need and do what needs done to keep my brain from becoming fogged up and clouded.
Owl – King of Swords – To better trust my perception of the world and others, I need to learn that seeing with clarity is not enough. You also have to act upon what you see in a way that is good for all involved. It’s about lack of hesitation and incorporating those perceptions into my response rather than holding them apart and separate.
Stag – Eight of Swords – In my life, greater dignity can create a stronger sense of integrity by making sure that I am not covering my eyes or looking at things through “colored glasses”. While being oblivious can sometimes have its benefits, when your eyes are open and you know what’s going on around you, it assists in moving through struggles and obstacles with grace… and allowing others to trust your guidance in doing the same.
Blackbird – Three of Swords and Page of Pentacles – In order to increase my motivation, I need to direct my focus toward putting my disappointments to work for me. Even failures have redeeming qualities to them and provide us from a chance to learn and grow. Take a look at these moments and seek out what transformative views are available through the lens of what has happened, then use this knowledge as cobblestones within your path forward.
Eagle – Queen of Pentacles and Five of Wands – Good and successful leadership requires a modicum of grace because it is through tripping over the thorns and feeling their bite that we develop the empathy needed to lead others well. Without empathy, there is no connection with those you lead. Without that connection, there is no way to know what they need and come to an understanding of the best path for the greatest good.
Salmon – Six of Pentacles – I have been moving by instinct without realizing it in the direction of balance and fairness. The thing is? I do realize it… just not all the time. My moral compass requires balance and fairness. It demands it from me and from the world around me. I move in that direction without thought, and am only aware of it occasionally from time to time.
Wild Goose – Ace of Cups – Emotions are something that I am “stretching into” at the moment. For a long time they felt like they “didn’t fit” and I struggled with connecting with others on an emotional level, because I wasn’t able to connect to myself on an emotional level. As I have become older, I’ve grown to realize the value of emotions and how precious the establishment of that emotional connection can be in building long lasting, positive friendships and relationships. This is something I wasn’t conscious of before, but have learned through trial and error along the way.
DECK USED:Â EL GOLIATH TAROT 2ND EDITION
#ConnectWithYourDeckChallenge by E Roebuck-Jones
Question: When do I trust myself?
The Tower – Libyan Desert Glass and Fire Lily – What connects the Fire Lily to Libyan Desert Glass is heat and destruction. One is created in the radioactive heat of a meteorite hitting desert sands… the other thrives in the ashes in the aftermath of fire’s consumption. Both are breathtaking results from catastrophically destructive events. Many good things can come from chaos and destruction, you just have to wait for the chaos to end and the dust to settle to see what’s there waiting for you in the aftermath.
Five of Swords – Cinnabar and Blackthorn – Blackthorn is extremely sour, and is protected by long sharp thorns. Cinnabar is a dangerous mineral due to it’s high mercury content, and yet the vibrant color has been a draw to humanity for centuries both as an ornamental stone as well as ground into powder as a dye. Sometimes people do stupid things in pursuit of the things that spark their interests and passions… like wearing mercury rich stones or risking the long reach of sharp thorns to pick oh-so-appealing fruit that is then discovered to be oh-so-very sour.
The Magician – Polybasite and Dogwood – Both Polybasite and Dogwood are known for their value in versatility. One is a wealth of alchemical elements, the other a wealth of potential to create an array of different tools, furniture, decorations, and even instruments. Add to this that the meaning of the dogwood flower is that of rebirth, and what you have depicted in this card is a wealth of resources and skillful adaptability.
Take Away – During times of chaos and conflict, I can find myself frozen. This holding pattern can be full of uncertainty, but once that chaos has come to an end and the conflict has settled? It is like the starting shot to get me going. In the aftermath of these events, I know exactly what I want and where I want to go, and I am ready to forge a path and rebuild, eager to move forward, and trust myself and the direction my instincts and intuition take me in implicitly.
DECK USED:Â TELLURIC TAROT
Today’s meditation was fifteen minutes long and was a guided meditation with interval timer again. The topic of today’s meditation was an introduction to the act of 
Today’s meditation was just under twelve minutes long and was another of the guided meditations with interval timer.  This guided meditations was one of my favorite types. That is to say, it was one of the yoga nidra full body scans that starts at the top of the head and slowly moves through each of the body’s parts from head to toe, focusing on sensation and relaxation one body part at a time.
Today’s meditation was just over ten minutes long, and was another guided meditation with interval timer. I’ve decided that the guided meditations definitely have a place in my meditation practice. Although the non-guided meditations are nice, these guided ones sometimes allow me to relax a bit more fully and can assist in keeping my mind from wandering.
Twisting the Leaf 