It’s Just Dirt

At the moment, I’m playing catch up after having not kept up on my blog posts for a few days, so I don’t remember what the meditation was like today… or if I did it, to be honest. I will return to updating about my meditation each day once I’m caught up with my posts again.

Tarot of Haunted House - Five of PentaclesToday’s draw is is the Five of Pentacles, which is traditionally a representation of tests, trials, and hardship in the area of one’s finances, resources, health, hearth and home, and manifestations.

What really stands out to me in this card are the crab creatures. I mean goddamn… at least they’re not spiders, right?  Still.  Creepy as fuck.

The creep factor aside, though, we have a depiction of a creature that is clearly not suited to the cold outside reaching for the warmth beyond the walls of the church.  Caught in the cold, they look to the warmth of the light shining through the window and see salvation.  Would they be welcomed in should they go knock on the door? Who’s to say?  What world are we in?  Perhaps they would be… or perhaps they would be turned away in fear.

The message here is not to be afraid of those in need.  It’s easy to look at the homeless as something to fear… but the truth is?  They’re people too.  People that are down on their luck. People that are struggling. People that may not be on their medication because they can’t get their medication.  Sometimes these situations make them dangerous, but more often than not? They’re just people struggling to stay alive.

It’s a reminder not to ignore these people or their plight… and to treat them with kindness.  Take a moment to be grateful, perhaps, as well… that it is not you in that position.


LionHart’s #TheOctoberTarot #SeasonOfTheWitchChallenge Prompt
: How/where can the Spirit World aid my current path?

Zombie Tarot

Reading Summary: Providing me with quick direction (Eight of Wands) that will allow me to make good choices out of the options before me when I’m feeling overwhelmed (Seven of Cups), leading to a far more grounded and satisfactory emotional well-being (Queen of Cups).

Take Away: This is something that I am pretty much already aware of.  My spirit guide are there to help me in making good decisions that are to my benefit.  They are on my side and want to help, and all I need to do to take advantage of that help is listen and follow the guidance provided.


#DiscordTarotholicsOct2020 Challenge Prompt
: How can I safely explore echos from the past that are trying to get my attention?

Halloween Magick TarotReading Summary: The Seven of Wands is about defense, while the Queen of Wands is about “soft” control. In the Page of Cups we have the encouragement of an open heart, but there’s zippered lips and a snake heading towards her face in the imagery that indicates a need to take care just what you are opening yourself up to.

Take Away: The advice here is the need to stay on the defensive, and yet open to emotions even while being selective. Remember what you’ve learned so far about your emotions and your emotional intelligence, and when exploring the echoes of the past, it’s important to stay in control even while being receptive.

This is about balancing caution and receptivity, as well as about staying alert and aware so that you can go on the defensive when needed for safety’s sake.


#MysticStarChallenge October Challenge Prompt
: How can I honor my relationship with my Guides?

Halloween Spirit Tarot

Reading Summary: Take the time to listen (Temperance), focus on moving forward into someone better (The World), and treat yourself with understanding, while continuing to explore your emotional intelligence (King of Cups).

Note: The King of Cups in this spread is about how Gideon treats me, and using him as an example of how I should treat myself.

Take Away: In order to honor my relationship with my guides, I need to honor my relationship with myself and which includes being kind to myself and accepting of myself.  I also need to stay focused on becoming a better me as I move along my path. In each moment of growth, they offer guidance that I need only to be receptive to in order to honor them.  In being receptive to their messages, I then move forward, cycling from a lesser me to an even better me than the me that I was before. 


You’ve Got This

IMG_7087Today’s meditation was ten minutes long, and was a guided meditation with interval timer for my piriformis stretches.  The topic of today’s guided meditation was suppressing and ignoring emotions.

This is a topic that I have a good deal of experience in.  Although I disagree with part of what was said (ie: that you cannot bury your emotions for long, just as one example), I do agree with the overall message that it is healthier to deal with your emotions than bury them.  I also agree that, while you probably can’t bury your emotions forever.  You can bury them for a hell of a long time. But I think that to do it for an entire lifetime might cause a great deal more harm than good.

The method of dealing with difficult and unpleasant emotions that is mentioned in this meditation, was to step aside and examine them as an observer, then return to deal with them.  Although I think that this might be a good method for a lot of people, I think that “stepping aside” like that for me?  Would be just too close to stepping away instead.  Too tempting to distance myself and then say “fuck it” and push them aside.

Tarot of Haunted House - Six of CupsToday’s draw is the Six of Cups, which is traditionally a representation of nostalgia and childhood memories. 

As is hinted at in the word “nostalgia” above, this card usually deals with positive memories that bring someone pleasure or joy to bring up to the surface. 

What stands out to me the strongest in the imagery of today’s card is a combination of the warm purity provided by the shades of white and gold, combined with the two figures in the center.   Today, when I look at this card, I see the woman handing a cup of flowers to the girl…. but I see them as the same person.   The young child and the woman different ages of the same woman as she looks back on a beautiful golden memory of her past, and the child reaches forward into the beautiful dreams of a future moment.

Together, these two figures bathed in the golden glow of hopes and memories, remind us that dreams can come true, even those idealistic ones we have as children and forget about as an adult. And when you accomplish a dream you hold close to your heart?  It’s time to pause and look back at where you started and feel a fissure of pleasure.


LionHart’s #TheOctoberTarot #SeasonOfTheWitchChallenge Prompt
: What magickal cycle is this New Moon in Libra kicking off?

Dark Mansion Tarot

Reading Summary: Balancing your new emotional growth (Ace of Cups), with the work ahead (Eight of Pentacles) is something that you have all the tools in your arsenal in order to do (The Magician).

Take Away:  Okay, so I’ve managed to accept that I don’t have to lock my emotional growth away to protect it during the holiday rush, but that hasn’t really meant that I’ve come to understand how I’m going to balance them.  The magical cycle this new moon in Libra is kicking off for me is about finding that balance and learning that I’m more than capable of doing this.

The cards are essentially saying, “You’ve got this.”


#DiscordTarotholicsOct2020 Challenge Prompt
: What do I need to focus on for self care this new moon?

Tarot ZReading Summary: Take that unfounded worry and despair that you’re feeling (Three of Swords), and surround it in your drive and ambition (Knight of Wands), eagerness and enthusiasm (The Fool).

Take Away:  This is a carry over from today’s Lionharts reading I did earlier, where I was worrying over how I’m going to balance my emotional journey and the holiday rush over the next ten weeks.  In that reading it told me that I have the tools and abilities at my disposal to balance these things. 

Here in this reading, we then see what these tools are and what to do with them.  The cards are indicating that the only thing holding me back are my own doubts, uncertainties, and thoughts of failure.   If I want this to work, I need to let go of these things and allow myself to get swept up in the enthusiasm.   Instead of wading into the surf one inch at a time… dive right in and adjust on the fly.


#MysticStarChallenge October Challenge Prompt
: What lesson would my Spirit Guides like to bring to my attention at this time?

Halloween Spirit Tarot

Reading Summary:  The topic is about balancing work life and personal life/self care.  The figure in the imagery of the Two of pentacles points an arrow through the disk at the top of the Star and the World, indicating that these two cards are my target.   The other two cards are both “end of a journey cards” indicating a choice to move from an old way of doing things to something new.

The message here is that I need to remember that the shit I’m walking away from wasn’t that good (Eight of Swords atop The Star).   I have an opportunity now to move on from that more harmful way of doing things to something better (The World atop the Ten of Swords).

Take Away:  My spirit guides want to remind me of what my target is, and that I’m in the process of transitioning between the unhealthy way I was doing things and this new healthier balance.   These cards are a reminder to help me stay on track and not fall back into my old way of doing things.


#ConnectWithYourDeckChallenge by E Roebuck-Jones
Question: Do I have a spirit animal? If so, what qualities does it possess?

Halloween Magick Tarot - Nine of SwordsAnswer:  Don’t worry about it at this time. 

I didn’t draw the additional cards concerning what qualities the spirit animal might possess, because the Nine of Swords came up when I asked if I have a spirit animal.

The message is clearly that now’s not the time to be worrying about this, and to be honest?  I’m fine with that.

I have a lot on my plate at the moment and am just starting to occasionally feel the differences between my intuition and messages from my spirit guides.   There’s no need to over-complicate things by delving into the whole animals/humans/spirits/ghosts/ancestors side of things right now. 


My Cards Have BRS (Broken Record Syndrome)

Ikigai Today’s meditation was ten minutes long and focused on the Japanese concept of Ikigai, which is is a term that is used to indicate the source of value in one’s life or the things that make one’s life worthwhile.

This was interesting, and more so because just yesterday Becca put up a video about finding one’s legacy in life, which is a similar concept, because I think if you discover and foster your Ikigai, you are building that legacy.

As I said in Becca’s video last night, I don’t really have any family I connect with other than my twin sister and my mother, and I sincerely doubt I will have a very significant legacy in any direct way. I think my legacy will be in a more esoteric way… and delivered through those things that make up my ikigai.

That is to say, the things I do, the interactions I have, the things that I create… they are like little pebbles dropped in a pond, creating ripples that spread outward.  Sometimes these ripples rock boats along the way and influencing other things in some small ways, sometimes the ripples join with other’s ripples and become waves of change beneath the water and upon the shore. That is my legacy.

Halloween Tarot Today’s draw is a double without a jumper, which is to say that they came out together as one.   The cards in today’s draw are the Six of Ghosts (Cups) and the Death card.

My intuitive reaction to these cards a carry over from the messages in yesterday’s Self Care reading.  I need to take some time for myself to seek out the things I enjoy and the small pleasures in life, I need to pay attention to them and really sink into them while I can.  Because, by doing so during this time, I will be nourishing myself and thus preparing myself for the change to come (the busy season starting next month).

(Side note… I think the reason that I ended up with so many jumpers and doubles in yesterday’s Self Care spread is that they were seeking to provide clarity and make sure I couldn’t misinterpret the cards and sway them in a “preferred direction”.   They are essentially saying “you’re not listening, so lets spell it out for you”.)

Deck Used: Halloween Tarot

Bonus Reading

Another #TarotForGrowthOctober prompt.

Question: Where may I benefit from a new perspective?

Halloween Spirit Tarot Reading Summary:  (Noting that I am being stalked by the Six of Cups recently.)  Emotions concerning past experiences (Six of Cups) and habits learned that need to be changed (Page of Swords) concerning working with others (Three of Pentacles).

Take Away:  Sometimes you need other’s abilities, knowledge, and expertise to get things done (and done well).  I’ve had some bad experiences when it comes to working with others, and it pollutes my perceptions of the process and my feelings concerning doing so in the future.  The cards are telling me that I need to consider a new perspective, and work at getting to a place where I would be open to trying again sometime in the future.

Deck Used: Spirit Tarot (by Spencer’s Gifts Halloween Spirit Store)

Sense of Self

Today’s meditation was just over ten minutes long, and focused on separating from the “self” and becoming a witness in order to deal with difficult emotions and grasp that they are temporary and will pass.

This type of detachment is something that I’m intimately familiar with, but what I really liked about today’s guided meditation was the explanation that came before moving on to the topic of separation from self to deal with emotions.

In leading up to the topic, it spoke about how we say we have a body, and we have a mind.  We speak of these things like they are possessions, rather than saying, for example, that we are a body or we are a mind.  This brings to bear the question of what are we?  She speaks on how many advanced meditation practitioners have come to the conclusion that each of us is a “Witness”, and that in the experience of being human, each of us is at our core pure awareness.

I found this a very interesting perspective, and it fits in well with how I view the world, people, life, and my practice as a whole.  I’ve heard similar perspectives in the past, but how it was presented in today’s guided meditation really struck a chord for me.

Today’s draw is a double without a jumper, meaning that they both came out of the deck together. The cards in today’s draw are the Eight of Cups and The Sun card.

When I look at today’s cards, the message that comes through is about moving on from uncertainty and into a more positive outlook.  I think this goes well with what you and I have been experiencing the last couple of days with the drop and my struggles to fill the shoes as  I feel necessary to be on the supportive side of things.   It’s something I really struggle with, and I don’t entirely understand why.  I’m a responsible person, and I see the aftermath as very much an important responsibility, and yet I wobble under that weight time and again.

As the scales slide back into balance, though, I feel lighter and warmer. Less struggle and more gratitude.  I think you are right that the top space swings high, then like a pendulum, comes to swing back the other way and knock me off that perch.  The cards are telling me that I need to accept my shortcomings and move away from the self blame and recriminations.  Be happy with the experience as it is and bask in the balance we have with each other, instead of picking apart my part of it a little at a time to dig out negatives.

Deck Used: Dark Mansion Tarot

Bonus Reading

Another #TarotForGrowthOctober prompt again today.  As mentioned before, I might try to do the bonus reading every day (or near to it) for this month.

Question: How can I better honor the divine masculine within me? (Note: The word honor is stressed to make sure I keep in mind the nature of the question through the reading of the cards and answers written here.)

Reading Summary: The Queen of Cups is about receptive alpha emotional energy, and the King of Cups on the other side is projective emotional energy.  Separating the two is the Eight of Wands, which speaks of swift, fast paced action and change, and I also pick up hints of the inverted meaning of misalignment in the image.

Take Away:   Recognition and acceptance of my emotions is needed.  At the moment, I use my busyness and the cacophony of having my fingers in so many pots to put aside and separate myself from my emotions.  If I want to honor the divine masculine within me, I need to seek out a better connection between that receptive energy and the projective energy within my emotions, and seek a wholeness and synergy without wedging “everything else” in between to keep my emotions detached and compartmentalized.

Deck Used: Spirit Tarot (from the Halloween Spirit Store and Spencer’s Gifts)