Roadkill or Ride

IMG_8259Today’s meditation was just under twelve minutes long, and was another of the Calm app’s guided meditation with additional interval timer for my piriformis (and forearm flexor) stretches.

Honestly… I don’t remember the theme of today’s guided meditation.  I listened to it, but I was far more focused on the piano chords being played in the background.  There were like… drops of water on a smooth body of water.  Like you could ride those drops from one drip to the next.

It was very peaceful and relaxing.

Fantastic Menagerie Tarot - DeathToday’s draw is the Death card, which is traditionally a representation of organic change.  This is different to sudden and chaotic change like what is represented in the Tower, and is instead about change that develops over time and may, or may not, come to a tipping point at some time along the way.   It isn’t sudden, but a development where something ends so that something new can begin.

What really stands out to me in the imagery of this card today is the frog on the right hand side holding the cattail like a spear as well as the frog that is beneath the foot of the heron.

The message I see here in the imagery of today’s card is not just about change, but it’s about not resisting change.  It’s about allowing yourself to roll with the changes taking place so that they don’t trample you under their feet in order to just keep moving forward.  Because that change is going to happen whether you fight it or not. So do you want to be roadkill under the change’s tires… or rather take a moment to see the direction change is moving in and make sure you’re on board for the ride?

With today being the last day of the holiday rush, this message rings especially true for me today as a reminder that it’s time to slow down, and to not allow myself to squirm and fight that slowing but take advantage of it to allow myself time to rest and recover from the neglect and abuse I’ve inflicted on myself over the past six weeks.


#DiscordTarotolicsDec2020 Challenge Prompt
: Where should I direct my focus this week to foster my understanding towards others?

Winter Waite Tarot 2019 EditionReading Summary: Be consciously appreciative of all you have accomplished (Nine of Pentacles).  Now is a time to put away your authoritative and controlling side of your nature (King of Pentacles Rx) and lean into your intuition and spirituality (The High Priestess). It’s time to find balance once more (Two of Pentacles).

Take Away: The message here is that if I want to be able to be understanding towards others, I need to first take the time to settle myself back into a comfortable and balanced place of gratitude and reconnect with my spirituality first.

I’ve spent the past six weeks essentially neglecting and abusing myself in order to keep up with the holiday rush. I’ve closed myself off from people and even from loved ones on a number of different levels (social and emotional primarily) and I need time to find my balance again.   The cards here are indicating that once I have taken care of myself, it will be much easier for me to direct my compassion and understanding towards others.


Mystic Star December Challenge Prompt
: How can I be more open to the gifts that others wish to share with me?

Dreamland Tarot

Reading Summary:  Don’t be combative (Seven of Wands Rx) when people are trying to reach out to support you (Queen of Cups and Queen of Wands) when you’re feeling overburdened (Ten of Wands).

Take Away:  Support can come in a number of different ways.  Sometimes it comes in the form of emotional support.  Sometimes it comes in the form of inspiration or hands-on help with your burdens.   In order to be more open to this support in all of the forms it may come in, I need to make sure I don’t bulk up in defense when it’s offered.  Set pride and ego aside and allow them to reach out and help in the ways that they are willing and able to do so.


The World Spins On, Regardless

IMG_7984Today’s meditation was just over ten minutes long, and was a guided meditation with interval timer for my piriformis stretching.

The topic of today’s meditation was actually an activity in love and compassion where you first build an energy of love and compassion that you direct toward yourself, and then towards a loved one, and finally towards the world as a whole.

I had an interesting experience in the middle of this meditation.  I was wide awake, so it was not a dream, but it felt as if my consciousness… slipped into something.  A dark place of flickering lights like stars in a midnight sky with a flowing swirl of navy and blue similar to those photos you see of traffic where the shutter has been left open and all of the lights are streaked swirls instead of points of light.  There was a moment when I seemed to move within that swirl of blue streaks like a leaf in a stream.  It was only for a brief moment, and then I was back within my meditation.

I think I might have astral traveled… which would be a first.  But I’m not 100% certain, as that is not something I’ve ever done before.  In fact, it’s something I’ve been told I will be unable to do unless I ease up on my grounding and rooting.  As I haven’t eased up on these things… this brings into doubt that that was what I experienced.

Winter Waite Tarot 2019 Edition - Four of SwordsToday’s draw is the Four of Swords, which is traditionally a representation of rest and restoration.  It’s about taking a break and allowing yourself time to heal and recover.

First of all, I took this card as a demand to do exactly that.  Although my phone has been going off with orders all day, I have made a concerted effort to ignore work for the majority of the day and do a little self care instead.  I even took a nap.   The only thing I’ve kept up on was responding to customers.

Beyond that… what stands out to me the strongest in the imagery of this card today is the little bird.  That bird looking over the resting man feels a lot like the stained glass window with the figures in it that is in the traditional RWS cards.

In both cases, what I see is a loving, caring watchfulness.  A quiet wait and gentle protection that is less about brute strength and more about love and kindness.   Perhaps the bird is in fact the soul of the man, watching over the body while it recovers.

The message in today’s card is that there’s more to kindness to self than just going through the motions. You have to mean it, and you have to trust that when you are taking care of yourself that your responsibilities and the world around you can take care of themselves for a while.


#DiscordTarotolicsDec2020 Challenge Prompt
: Where should I direct my focus this week to foster my relationship with myself?

Fantastic Menagerie Tarot by Baba StudiosReading Summary: Make sure you’re practicing a bit of moderation (Temperance) when planning your direction (Two of Wands) and forward motion into the future (Six of Swords) concerning the things you want to pick up and explore (Page of Wands).

Take Away: These cards are a reminder that I can’t take on every single little thing that strikes my interest or pulls at my attention. There are so many things that I want to do and explore, and it always feels like there’s not enough time to do them all.  So I always try to pile on more and more of them onto my plate so that I can make sure I get to explore them all. 

But the thing is?  When I pile on so much, suddenly none of it is any fun and it all feels like a chore. Moderation is important.  Extremely difficult for me, but important.  Which means prioritizing is important as well. If I can’t get to everything I want to do and try, that means I need to make sure I prioritize the ones that feel the most important ahead of the rest.