Today’s meditation was just over eleven minutes long and another guided meditation from the Calm app with added interval timer for my piriformis stretching.

The focus of today’s meditation was about that um…. I think it’s Icelandic?  The concept of watching the storm through a window while you remain comfortable and safe on the other side.  (*Looks it up and comes back.*) Gluggaveður.  Essentially it translates to “window weather” and refers to the kind of weather you like to watch but don’t want to be involved in.

The guided meditation took this concept, and used it to encourage how someone can detatch from the intensity of one’s inner feelings or the immediate reactivity of a situation in order to find calm and peace in the middle of chaos.   This… is not really good advice for me, to be honest, as I have spent the majority of my life detaching from my feelings and that is my natural inclination when something intense arises.  Now… I’m instead working on how to better connect with them.  Still, it was a nice meditation.

Today’s draw is the Six of Wands, which is traditionally a representation of accolades and praise, admiration and public/social recognition of one’s accomplishments.

This card actually echoed for me some thoughts I was having in the shower this morning about compliments and the motivations behind such things.  I had a long rambling dialogue in my brain concerning compliments, and how it’s always nice to hear compliments but how important it is to not allow them to go to your head.

I say this because when compliments are given, there is always a motivation behind them.  Always.  It can be something as kind or innocuous as someone caring about you and wanting you to feel good, or wanting to make you feel good because it makes them feel good.  Or it can be something as mostly harmless as someone wanting you to like them and thus they give compliments in the hopes to endear you to them.   There are also times, though, when compliments are used in less innocent and guileless ways.  They can be used to “pull the wool” over someone’s eyes or to manipulate, for example.

I came to the thought at the end that perhaps the absolute best kind of compliment is the unintended one or the “back channel” one.  That is to say when someone says something that was not intended as a compliment but you personally see as something positive.   And, the compliments someone may say to someone else about you with no thought or expectation it might get back to you at some point.   These are great and amazing, because you know beyond a shadow of a doubt that there is no motivation behind them directed at you.  They’re like little nuggets of pure gold panned out of a river, yes?

Anyway, I feel this card was an echo of these thoughts.  All compliments are nice as long as they are true, no matter the motivation behind them.  Just keep in mind that like the wide open eye of the horse in this card’s imagery, that you need to keep an eye on what those motivations might be.  Just in case.

DECK USED:  KEI TAROT LOVE

The Radical Love Tarot Challenge Prompt
Topic:  Radical transformation
Question: What area of my life and perspective is in need of some radical transformation?

What area of my life is in need of some radical transformation?

Four of Wands and Four of Swords – You are currently in a time of rest and recovery, but that doesn’t mean it’s a time to just lie back at  home and let the world move on around you.  Instead, it’s important to keep moving and doing small things.  They don’t have to be big or showy as long as you’re not sitting stagnant.

What area of my perspective is in need of some radical transformation?

Page of Wands and Queen of Swords – See if you can’t be a bit less harsh with yourself and a little kinder.  Remember that you are still learning your way, even as you’ve done this all so many times before.  Don’t expect everything to just be the same as the last.  The skills you have learned can help you rise above and do better this time around.

DECK USED:  JONASA JAUS TAROT 5TH EDITION

#DiscordTarotolicsFeb2021 Challenge Prompt
Question:  Where have I been settling for “good enough” in my life?

Reading Summary:  Retail therapy (Queen of Cups atop Page of Pentacles) is all well and good but it won’t carry you forward to your goals (Knight of Pentacles). Make sure that you are using your scarcity issues (Five of Pentacles) to help keep you on track (it all comes back to the Knight of Pentacles).

Take Away: We all have fears and worries that help keep us motivated towards our goals.  One of mine is my scarcity issues.  The fear of failing at keeping stability alive and strong in both my financial aspects and home life.   This is a motivator for me and not necessarily an unhealthy one as long as I don’t use it to push myself too hard or overwhelm myself with either too much work, or too much anxiety.

Currently (the past month or three) I’ve been sort of slacking on using this tool and over the past month it has turned into a bit of a stagnancy.  I’ve also, admittedly, indulged in quite a bit of retail therapy.  So yeah… it’s time to do a bit better.  Fair enough.

DECK USED:  KEI TAROT LOVE

I had a chocolate muffin with chocolate sauce on top.  Okay, so I know that’s kind of stupid as a self kindness, but I don’t often eat the chocolate muffins and I’ve never put chocolate sauce on one before.  it was really good. Like a rich and gooey lava cake almost, with the lava on the outside.

Today’s meditation was just under nineteen minutes long and was a guided meditation with interval timer for my piriformis stretches (which, yes, are still being a painful pain in the ass).

The focus of today’s meditation was about the reverence we feel for that which is beyond our reach and our ken.  I said something about this earlier today in a chat when speaking about “how tarot works” and where the messages come from.  It’s important to keep in mind that there is far more in this world that we don’t grasp or understand than there is that we do. This doesn’t mean that everything we don’t understand is magic or metaphysical or even spiritual… but it means that we need to respect that the potential for what is out there is vast and appreciate that potential of possibilities.

Today’s draw is the Six of Swords, which is traditionally a representation of letting go and moving on from conflict and rough waters into something calmer and smoother.

It is the hand (big surprise here) that stands out to me in the imagery on this card today and it speaks to me of saying “stop”.  Of having an awareness of yourself and what you are willing to put up with (the eye in the center of the palm) and being able, when things go beyond that point, to put a halt to them and move on to something better.

The message in today’s card is about diligence.  It’s about watching out for yourself and making sure that you remain in a place where you can be yourself and be true to yourself… and stand up for yourself by saying “no” when something doesn’t follow along those lines for you.

Right now, what I want to say no to is the depression that is weighing me down and dragging at my insides like barb-filled black tar.  I want to turn away from it and push it away… but it is not one of those things that I have a choice in.  But what I can do is continue to work at being authentic to myself, true to my values and beliefs, and patient as the world inside my brain begins to shift and right itself again… eventually.

DECK USED:  MOON DUST TAROT

The Radical Love Tarot Challenge Prompt
Topic:  Abundance
Question: How can I better recognize and appreciate the abundance in my life?

Reading Summary:  Remember that you are strong and capable and have the ability to take control of a situation, turn it into something you believe in and are willing to fight for, and balance that into your life.

Take Away:  This is about autonomy and the ability to build and manifest what I desire in life without “upsetting the apple cart” of my life balance in the process.  It’s important, especially right now while I’m struggling with my depression, to remember that I am still in control on what I do, where I go, what I stand for, and what I manifest in my life.

DECK USED:  DESTINY DECK

#DiscordTarotolicsFeb2021 Challenge Prompt
Question:  What in my life makes me feel the most thankful that’s in need of acknowledgement?

Reading Summary: That I have the ability to be decisive (Seven of Pentacles Rx)) when presented with choices (Seven of Cups) so that I don’t overwhelm myself anymore than necessary (Ten of Wands Rx).

Take Away: No hemming and hawing, no waiting for later. I rarely need to “sit on it” when needing to make a decision.  I know what is right for me and I reach for it, and am able to allow the other choices that are not as fitting to fall away. I see a lot of people that aren’t able to do this and when they are confronted with a  number of choices before them, they stall out with an inability to decide and become overwhelmed by those choices.

This is something that I very rarely have to worry about, as the majority of the time I know what is right for me and am decisive in reaching for it.  The thing is?  I rarely acknowledge this in myself or even think about it… until I see those others out there that struggle under the need to make choices.  I am very grateful I don’t spend a lot of time stewing in my choices.  Very thankful.

DECK USED:  MOON DUST TAROT

I spent time organizing my decks today.  I’ve been feeling frustrated by the lack of space and how I struggle to find the decks I need sometimes. It’s been bugging me a lot lately and eating at me. I can’t really do anything about the lack of shelf space right now, but I was able to get my “floating” decks (decks that don’t currently have a home on a shelf or in a trunk) into a semblance of order that will hopefully make things easier.