daily draw

Breaks in the Storm

/ Twist the Leaf / 1 Comment

IMG_2806Today’s meditation was just over ten minutes long, and focused upon the voices in our head and how they can turn against us at times when we need support the most.

The guided meditation walked through the process of looking at those internal voices not as whispers of truth or influences on how you should feel, but from an observer on the outside.

Everyone has these voices that whisper about insecurities, self-doubts, and pick at our weaknesses.   Today’s meditation encouraged looking at these voices as an observer so that you can judge for yourself whether what those voices are saying is useful or valid… or far more likely, just a bunch of judgemental hot air.

Spirit of Clouds - Majestic Earth TarotToday’s draw is the Spirit of Clouds (King of Swords) which is commonly a representation of a projective alpha energy, personality, or person in the areas of communication and intellect.  This often portrays itself in themes concerning authority, clear thinking, and intellectual strength.

The appearance of the Spirit of Clouds in today’s draw ties into the theme of today’s meditation.   When I look at the image on the card, what I see is the beaten and battered earth, the torrential rains, and stormy clouds above… and the clearing of the storm in the distance.

The message here is to look for the break in the storm.  I have had some time lately where I’ve seen those breaks.  Times when I’ve felt the shift of breeze and fresh air sift through my mind and spirit, allowing the weight of winter’s struggles and clouded sensations of feeling smothered to be brushed away for brief moments and allow me to feel refreshed and clean once more…. just like that break in the storm in the image.

This card is an encouragement to savor those moments, and reach for them.  Enjoy them and let them help lift me further out of the dim and the dark and into the light where my spark resides.

DECK USED:  MAJESTIC EARTH TAROT

#TarotForGrowthFebruary Challenge Prompt
Question: How can I improve my relationship with productivity?

Tarot in WonderlandReading Summary:   It’s time to start tapping back into my creativity (Knight of Cups)… now (Eight of Wands).

The deck did not want to give me any more cards after the Knight of Cups.  When it finally did, it gave me the Eight of Wands.  The Eight of Wands is sass, because the deck had already said all that it wanted to say.

Take Away:  If I want to improve my current relationship with productivity, it’s time to start acting on those small sparks of inspiration and creativity when they start to sneak in to whisper in my ear.   At the moment, these small sparks are very sparse and difficult to hear, but just like one’s intuition, the more you listen… the more it will speak up.

DECK USED:  TAROT IN WONDERLAND

#DiscordTarotholicsFeb2020 Challenge Prompt
Question: What one thing can I do today to make my life better?

Weird Cat Tarot

Reading Summary:  Let Gideon (King of Cups) and my loved ones (Three of Cups) lift me up and inspire hope (The Star).

Take Away:  All of the reads so far today are focusing upon those moments of “light at the end of the tunnel” and “fresh air breathed through the soul” feelings that I’ve been experiencing the last few days.  Whatever hole of fog that I’ve managed to fall into is beginning to allow me glimpses of the sky above and my guidance to climbing my way out is to allow others that care about me to inspire hope while I reach for the handholds that will allow me to climb free of the hole.

DECK USED:  WEIRD CAT TAROT

Owl and Bones February Two Card Challenge
Question: Absorb / Take Action

Love Is In The Earth TarotAbsorb : The Four of Crystal Spheres (Pentacles) is an indication that I need to take time to really sink into the feeling of safety, stability, and security instead of allowing myself to be carried away by worries and fears.

Take Action :  The Two of Crystal Spheres (Pentacles) as the “take action” card speaks finding balance.  Things have been out of whack for me for quite a while now, and in order to find that balance again, the cards indicate that I am going to need to actively reach for it.

DECK USED:  LOVE IS IN THE EARTH TAROT

 

Stability… and Shifting Focus

/ Twist the Leaf / 2 Comments

Today’s meditation was ten minutes long, but I had a hard time focusing today because I was dealing with some banking issues that got in the way.   The meditation today was tacked on to the tail end of my yoga/physiotherapy, which was really needed.

I actually sort of feel as if I haven’t meditated today, even though I did, and I will do another session before bed tonight as well.

Four of Pentacles - Tarot of the Hidden RealmToday’s draw is the Four of Pentacles, which combined with the imagery in this card speaks to me of protection and stability.

Older generations always speak about how important it is to put money away and save for the future, and that is what I see here.   I see a preparation and protection of one’s future and the future of what is important to you.

Just recently I upped my contributions to my IRA (individual retirement account), as I am already paying the absolute max payment that I can per month on my mortgage.  I don’t want to blow all of my money, but want to make sure that I have cushions in place for when I need them, including a larger one for when I just can’t keep up with the pace I’ve set for myself over the past fifteen years.

I see the appearance of this card as confirmation that I’m making the right choices in this area for the time being, and encouragement that I’m heading in the right direction.

DECK USED:  TAROT OF THE HIDDEN REALM

#TarotForGrowthFebruary Challenge Prompt
Question: What is my relationship with productivity?

Regretsy Tarot

Reading Summary:  Even though I’m getting a good deal done (Four of WTF), I’m struggling with acknowledging my ingenuity and progress (3 of Tools) which is blocking me from moving forward and leaving behind the negativity of the last few months in exchange for new adventures (April’s Army).  Because of this, I’m feeling a disconnect with the joy in my creative process (The Owl and the Octopus).

Take Away: This is a topic we’ve touched on a couple of times lately (including today) in an effort to pull me back into finding my sense of balance after the mess from the letter and the fear it manifested in me.   I’ve been especially dismissive of my own skills and abilities lately, especially in relation to my creativity and my business.   I know this, I’m just struggling with moving past it.

DECK USED:  REGRETSY TAROT

#DiscordTarotholicsFeb2020 Challenge Prompt
Question: Who in my life needs extra attention at this time?

Lion's Gateway Tarot

Reading Summary: I need to keep an eye out for those in my life that are feeling a lack of focus (Knight of Swords) and hesitating to move forward (Hanged man).  When I spot them avoiding connecting with the path forward (Two of Wands) it will be important to step in and offer them a guiding light and a bit of hope (The Star).

Take Away:  These cards indicate that I need to stop focusing so hard on my own problems and pay more attention to those around me that may also be going through their own struggles.  I’ve had my own issues with self worth lately, but the cards suggest that if I want to dig myself out of my own hole?  I will be able to do that by helping those around me that are struggling in finding their own footing on their own paths.

DECK USED:  LION’S GATEWAY TAROT

Owl and Bones February Two Card Challenge
Question: Let it go / Care Bear Stare

Dishonored TarotLet It Go : Step away from unkind thoughts…

Care Bear Stare :  …and into the spirit of generosity.

Take Away:  This is a reiteration of the reading today from the Tarotholics prompt.  It speaks about moving away from being a dick to myself and using helping others to bolster my own spirit and inner strength.

DECK USED:  DISHONORED TAROT

 

The Way Forward

/ Twist the Leaf / 1 Comment

IMG_2754Today’s meditation was just over eleven minutes long and focused on taking time to value yourself and your contributions those around you and yourself.

This is something I struggle with on a regular basis.  It’s not that I don’t acknowledge that I contribute.  I love helping people, teaching people, guiding people.  I love providing that little nugget of something that clicks for them and helps them along their path.   I love making beautiful things and sending them out into the world to improve the lives of others.

I contribute to the world around me in many, many different small ways that (I hope) flit out into the world like the butterflies of chaos theory, changing the world one tiny touch of positivity at a time.

BUT…. I have a hard time acknowledging my own worth.  And that reflects sometimes on how much worth and value I see in what I contribute to others and the world.  I’m aware of this, and I’m trying to be kinder to myself as I keep that in mind.

Majestic Earth TarotToday’s draw is a double without a jumper, which is to say that both cards came out together as one.  The cards in today’s draw are the Four of Water (Cups) and the Ace of Clouds (Swords).

What I see in today’s card(s) is a reiteration and reinforcement of yesterday’s read on the Tarotholics prompt.  That is to say, the cards are telling me that it’s time to put my apathy away.  Now is the time to breathe fresh air through my mind and heart, and step forward with purpose.

DECK USED:  MAJESTIC EARTH TAROT

#TarotForGrowthFebruary Challenge Prompt
Question: How can I improve my relationship with creativity?

Baba Studios Alice Tarot

Interpretation: Currently, my relationship with creativity is in the shithole, as was indicated by yesterday’s read for this challenge’s prompt.   The cards here are telling me that if I want to improve my relationship with creativity, I need to find steadier footing with my emotions (Queen of Cups). This is going to require taking in some new perspectives (Hanged Man) and the process of getting there is going to feel a bit like being on a tiltawhirl (Eight of Wands with the Wheel of Fortune).

DECK USED:  BABA STUDIO’S ALICE TAROT

#DiscordTarotholicsFeb2020 Challenge Prompt
Question: How can I better handle and/or respond to criticism?

Guided Hand Tarot

Reading Summary:  Look at all those cups.  Clearly I need to be more grounded in my emotions (Queen of Cups) when dealing with criticism and take the input as a jumping off point, both concerning the relationship of the one providing the criticism (Ace of Cups), and also for the learning experience it will give me so that I can move forward and do better (Page of Cups).

Take Away:  Sometimes we get stuck in a rut of our own making.  Criticism can often be the crowbar that pries us free of that rut.  It hurts, but if we can absorb the blow with grace, that criticism can provide new perspective and open you up to a new way of seeing and doing.

DECK USED:  THE GUIDED HAND TAROT

Owl and Bones February Two Card Challenge
Question: When to be a hermit? / When to be people-y?

Dixit Cards 10th Anniversary Expansion PackWhen to be a hermit? : Sometimes self reflection requires grounding and solitude.  Make sure that you are not doing the latter without the former.

When to be people-y? :  You can’t learn how to better associate and relate with other people unless you’re willing to step out and spend time with them. The first step is not shutting out those closest to you.

DECK USED:  DIXIT CARDS 10TH ANNIVERSARY EXPANSION PACK

Take Your Time

/ Twist the Leaf / 1 Comment

Today’s meditation was supposed to be twenty minutes long, but I ended up dozing off in the middle of it and it turned into a nearly three hour nap instead.   I’ll give it another go before sleep tonight.  I’m pretty sure I got at least ten minutes in, but I can’t be positive.  A second practice before bed won’t hurt anything.

Four of Swords - Tarot of the Hidden RealmToday’s draw is the Four of Swords, which is about rest and recuperation.

What I see in this card is the value of taking time to sit and think.  Not just the value of rest and recuperation, but in allowing your mind to roam and restore.  The allowance to mull things over and let time slide by as you do so, rather than demanding the answers now and pushing forward, always forward.

I’m always pushing forward, but today I took some time for myself.  I relaxed and watched some tv.  I meditated, and napped a bit more than I’d planned.   I loused about and played games on my phone.   Most of these things are not things I allow myself all that often, or at least I don’t openly allow myself to accept them without recriminations.   Today, though, I gave myself these small pleasures and did my best to not put myself down for them or the time spent with them.

DECK USED:  TAROT OF THE HIDDEN REALM

#TarotForGrowthFebruary Challenge Prompt
Question: What is my current relationship with creativity?

Circle of Life Tarot

Reading Summary:  Stagnant (Hermit) due to a waffling on choices (Two of Swords) has left me feeling a bit apathetic and unable to see the good/joy of creativity (Five of Cups), which is swiftly (Eight of Wands) spiraling me down into feelings of scarcity (Five of Pentacles).

Take Away:  Usually, my creativity is very free flowing and constantly pushing through me like an inner light.   Since my issues with that letter came in, and the self doubt that letter and the fear it created sparked up in me, my creativity has been very much blocked, though.  It feels heavy and I’m struggling with it a bit, to be honest.

DECK USED:  CIRCLE OF LIFE TAROT

#DiscordTarotholicsFeb2020 Challenge Prompt
Question: What do I need to focus on for self-care for this new moon?

Dame Darcy's Queen Alice Tarot

Reading Summary: Now is the time to go for it (Knight of Wands) concerning those new ideas I have (Ace of Swords) about my financial portfolio and establishing more solid financial footing (King of Pentacles).

Take Away: There’s some taxes stuff I’ve been putting off and a few ideas I’ve had for directing money in a different direction, but I’ve been putting it off as it hasn’t felt like the right time.  From these cards, it sounds like now is the time and I should hop to it.

DECK USED:  DAME DARCY’S QUEEN ALICE TAROT

Owl and Bones February Two Card Challenge
Question: Wash Away / Invigorate

Prisma Visions Tarot v5Wash Away :  It’s time to wash away the energies of winter that have been dragging me down and holding me back.  These energies didn’t serve me then and are not serving me now, it’s time to allow a fresh clean breeze to blow through and clear them out.

Invigorate :  Invigorate the industrious energies of spring. It’s time to start moving forward instead of wallowing in stagnation.

DECK USED:  PRISMA VISIONS TAROT V5

 

Finding the Path Forward

/ Twist the Leaf / 1 Comment

IMG_2723Today’s meditation was just over ten minutes long and focused upon not allowing yourself to get so caught up in “following the herd” that you lose track of your own autonomy.

This is not something that I have a problem with, but it is a trap that I see people fall into all the time.  Peer pressure is a real thing, and just because it’s not something I personally find myself swayed by doesn’t mean that it’s not permeated in those around me.  I see people all the time do things that they readily admit are not right for them… but yet do them anyway because it is expected of them or they have been pressured into it.

Perhaps I am simply too stubborn?  It is not as if I haven’t experienced such pressures.  My father pushed them on me on a daily basis…. I just chose not to let them influence my choices.   Then again, I am the one that constantly thinks nothing I do is quite good enough, yes?  So maybe he managed to wriggle his way in there after all.

Three of Clouds - Majestic Earth TarotToday’s draw is the Three of Clouds, which is the equivalent of the Three of Swords in the regular RWS tarot.

Although in this imagery I see the jagged rocks like ragged teeth chomping at the sky, a dangerous and deadly peril to all that try to pass through them… what I also see is the ripple of light upon the water.

The message in today’s draw is that even in the roughest of times, even when things look their darkest and the struggle is at its greatest, there is still hope.   There is still a light that will guide you forward, even in those hardest of times.  Like the rippling light on the water’s surface shows the way to shore, there is a path to freedom from these difficult times, sometimes you just have to be willing to take your time to get there.

DECK USED:  MAJESTIC EARTH TAROT

#TarotForGrowthFebruary Challenge Prompt
Question: How can I improve my relationship with my work?

Stretch Tarot

Reading Summary:  I need to spend more time looking at my work as fun (Knight of Wands) and allow the spark of joy creating can give (Knight of Cups) carry me away (The Chariot).

Take Away:  When I went through the month of January saturated in the effects of my buried fear tucked down deep within my gut?  I lost a lot of the joy that comes with my work and the creative process.  To have a better relationship with my work, I need to focus on rediscovering that joyful spark that creativity and manifestation of beautiful things can give me.

DECK USED:  STRETCH TAROT

#DiscordTarotholicsFeb2020 Challenge Prompt
Question: Do Spread #2
How can I ease my recent increase in anxiety?’

Hush Tarot

Reading Summary: Let it out (colors flow from dark to light to red, speaking of a transition from mellow and murky to a chaos of… outburst.  This impression is further reinforced by the Owl that seems to protect and shelter, and then the one crow in freedom before the trio that are in chaos.   These patterns follow what it feels like to me to go from holding something inside, to deciding I need to let it out, to the chaos of actually allowing whatever it is out into the open to speak about it with others.

There is also the element within the first card that speaks not just of shelter but danger.  The mouse clings for dear life.  The skull is buried and embedded within the clock.  You can only box things up for so long.    In the second card the bird is among the weeds looking out at freedom.  In the third, freedom has been found, but in order to find it, there is a need to accept chaos and allow it to run its course.

Take Away:  If I want the anxiety I’ve been experiencing lately (especially in the morning when waking up) to ease, I need to stop suppressing the things that are bothering me and get them out in the open. It will feel uncomfortable and chaotic, but sometimes the calm of suppression is far worse for you.

DECK USED:  HUSH TAROT

Owl and Bones February Two Card Challenge
Question: When am I a fish out of water? / When am I in my element?

WWI Propaganda Posters TarotWhen am I a fish out of water? :  Rivalry and competition cause me to retreat in exhaustion.  Although I am able to hold my own just fine, it brings me no joy or sense of accomplishment.

When am I in my element? :  When helping others.  I feel a deep sense of peace and accomplishment when I am able to help others and find ways to assist them on their path.

DECK USED:  WWI PROPAGANDA POSTERS TAROT

 

Ride It Out Instead of Fighting

/ Twist the Leaf / 1 Comment

IMG_2713Today’s meditation was ten minutes long, and was focused upon worrying and how it can so often be a useless endeavor.   I see worry spiral out of control all the time.  Somehow, I seem to attract people that have a worrier’s mind.  They pick up a worry like it’s a tiny little seed, and in their mind it takes root and grows like an invasive species until it fills up every nook and cranny of their minds.

This type of worry isn’t helpful, although some of those “what ifs” can come in helpful in preparing for the unknown.   But what it really does is raise anxiety and work the person up to the point that they can’t sleep and can’t get their mind onto anything else.

I have to admit, though… my own habit of ignoring issues is also not good.  The key is to find a happy medium.

Five of Wands and Six of Wands - Tarot of the Hidden RealmToday’s draw is a double without a jumper, which means that both cards came out together as one.  The cards in today’s draw are the Five of Wands and the Six of Wands (and, yes, this deck is very, very thoroughly shuffled).

What I see here in the cards is that sometimes you have to surrender to the chaos.   I don’t really do “chaos” all that well.  Change?  Sure… it’s difficult but I’m okay with riding it out.  Chaos, on the other hand…. I do not ride out very well.  It causes a lot of stress and anxiety and is just all around unpleasant.

BUT… it happens.  It may actually even be necessary for human development and progress.  I just need to remember that when it comes calling, not to fight so hard against it.  It’s natural… it’s temporary… and it’ll be okay.

DECK USED:  TAROT OF THE HIDDEN REALM

#TarotForGrowthFebruary Challenge Prompt
Question: What is my relationship with my work?

Oriens Tarot

Reading Summary: When I look at this spread, I see an undercurrent of the depths of the sea within the cards on either side, and the lifting up and surfacing of the center cards as being on a layer above.    Lower layer is cold, hard sea…. upper layer (center cards) is the rising to the surface and the light.

In juggling responsibilities (Two of Pentacles) and that inner spark of new inspirations (Ace of Wands),  I am working on rising above and letting go (Eight of Cups) of  what isn’t working and is holding me back from my aspirations (Ten of Pentacles Rx).

DECK USED:  ORIENS TAROT

#DiscordTarotholicsFeb2020 Challenge Prompt
Question: What is one of my least positive qualities?

Britt's Third Eye Tarot

Reading Summary: I’m a bastard about telling myself that I’m not doing well enough and or not contributing enough.  These cards are in reference to my self-judgement (Judgement) of my performance and abilities (Knight of Swords), and my inability to ever accept that I’m doing enough (Four of Pentacles).

Take Away: Accurate.  I’m actively working on being more accepting of myself and the products of my skills and abilities, and yet.. I am very much my own worst critic.  The cards are calling me out on this specifically in relation to my work and the product of my work.

DECK USED:  BRITT’S THIRD EYE TAROT

Owl and Bones February Two Card Challenge
Question: Elevate this / Calm the fuck down here

The Hide TarotElevate This :  This card speaks of playing to my strengths concerning helping others.  This is something that brings me a lot of enjoyment and a great deal of pleasure.  I like helping others find what’s right for them, and helping them find their path.   This card speaks to that ability, and my enjoyment of it.

Calm the fuck down here :  Ease up on myself concerning my accomplishments.  The cards have told me this a lot lately, but I need to accept that I don’t have to do everything at once, and nothing requires being done right this instant.  It’s okay to take my time and take things slow.

DECK USED:  HIDE TAROT