Striving Toward Excellence

Although I drew my card this morning when I woke up, I was not able to fit in my meditation until this evening, so today’s post is a little late.

Today’s meditation was 14 minutes and 47 seconds, and focused on ‘riding the waves’ of thought during meditation rather than pushing them away.

Although it was supposed to be about riding the waves of thought, though, it was really all about emotion instead. I found this unfortunate, because I rarely have all that much emotion when in meditation. My intrusive thoughts are almost always visual (as in mental images) without an emotional connotation.

So, it ended up that the guided meditation didn’t exactly hit its mark for me today. I was remarkably relaxed through it today, though.

Today’s draw is the Eight of Pentacles, which is a representation of determination, purpose, strength, and progress in the areas of the material world, resources, and money.

This is telling me that I am making progress.  I may not FEEL like I am making progress, but I am.  It also teaches that striving for perfection is not necessarily a bad thing, and that pushing forward and striving towards excellence in my goals will continue to move me forward to their completion.

I feel like this card is an encouragement to keep striving in my business, but more specifically, that it refers to my plans concerning my mortgage.

I greatly desire to be mortgage-free.  For the first time in years, I am getting back a tax return this year, and I plan on using that tax return to pay off what’s left of my line of credit (and pay for my dental surgery that’s coming up next month).

Once my line of credit that I’d accumulated during my cancer treatments is paid off, I can then start directing the money I had been putting monthly towards it into the mortgage instead.

At that point, I will be looking at just over 6.5 years until I own my place outright.  Mortgage-free.  Yes please.

Tarot Deck Modification

Darkness of Light Tarot

Darkness of Light Tarot with Black Edging Modification

I did my very first deck modification yesterday, and I’m really happy with it. Or, well perhaps I shouldn’t count it as my first, as I’ve used a punch to round off the corners on a sharp cornered deck in the past. That said, though, this was the first time I have gone beyond that.

The thing is, I have a handful of decks that I’ve purchased (or been given) over the years that I’m not 100% happy with. I’ve considered doing mods on them before, but it kind of felt like… a desecration.

That said, I’ve been following a video blog lately on YouTube, and the author does mods as a part of her practice. In one of her videos, she had a really good point about deck modifications.

That point, or rather, what it boils down to is that these decks are mine, and they need to be comfortable for me and attuned to my energy. If that means I need to alter a deck for it to “fit” me, then that should be okay because it’s my deck. Modifying it with this purpose only makes it that much more mine.

My thoughts on this might be different if I were collecting decks in order to resell, or to keep pristine. But that’s not the case. I use my decks. I enjoy handling them. Shuffling them. Feeling their energies and personalities shine through. So why not try to adjust them when they don’t feel quite right as they are on arrival in my collection? I really need to do something to see if I can make them more comfortable and more mine.

As I said, the only mods I’ve ever done before were rounding corners, and yesterday’s experiment with edging the Darkness of Light tarot in black.

Because of this, I’ve ordered a “practice deck” to try out trimming (making a deck smaller), as I’m not confident enough to just jump in with that type of more “extreme” modifications without a little practice first. Especially since I have a number of decks that I find discomfort in because they are so large. Or, in a couple of cases, because the border around the artwork is ugly and distracting.

Fortunately, I was able to find two used decks on eBay for $1.99 for both. These are the Blue Messiah Oracle and Cosmos Oracles. Both have cards that are quite large in size and are by the same author with similar artwork. I figure it can give me a good practice to try cutting down their size, and then edging them in color.

If they turn out, of course, I’ll have to give them a really thorough cleansing before using them, but I’m looking forward to their arrival and getting the chance to experiment.