the hanged man

Whose Shoes Are Those?

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IMG_8635Today’s meditation was just over ten minutes long, and was another of the guided meditations from the Calm app with interval timer for my piriformis and forearm flexor stretching.

The topic of today’s guided meditation was about having appreciation for one’s failures and mistakes. This is actually a topic that’s near and dear to my heart, and it’s one that is connected to something that I struggled for a very long time to understand in others (and sometimes still do).  That is to say, I’ve never understood why people hold back from doing things out of fear of being bad at them or not doing them right.

One of the biggest steps to learning a new skill or ability is trying and failing, you then take that knowledge learned about what doesn’t work… and try again. And through multiple failures, you learn what works and what doesn’t… and eventually?  You don’t fail because you become an expert.   This is the process of trial and error that is what learning something new is all about.

Bonestone & Earthflesh Tarot - The Hanged ManToday’s draw is the Hanged Man, which is traditionally a representation of taking time to look at new perspectives and gather additional data.  It’s about taking a pause in order to see things from a different angle, and allowing yourself time to wrap your mind around different viewpoints and opinions, ideas and angles… to see things from a different view in order to find more depth in understanding.

What stands out to me the strongest in the imagery of this card is the feathers in the lower right hand corner. They drew my eye very strongly today and are an indication of thought… of the fact that this man has a great need for thought and reevaluation… and clearly the opportunity to do so.

The thing is, even in situations like his?  We still have a choice on whether we are going to be open to reevaluation and a different perspective than the one we ourselves carry, or if we are going to remain closed in our own personal box and unwilling to see our situation (or any other topic) from a place removed from our own opinions and perceptions.

I have found, over time and observation, that I don’t communicate with people that are unwilling to try and see things from outside their own personal “box”, as if stuck in the certainty that their viewpoint on something is the -only- view point and only reality.  I struggle with communicating with people that have that mindset a lot, and it feels a lot like trying to squeeze blood out of a stone, especially when trying to help them in expanding their view to find a different perspective that might help them in some way.

I still try though, because I want to see their perspective… but I want to help them see more than that perspective as well in order to help them find a path out of the situations that have caused them to end up feeling stuck or stagnant.

DECK USED:  BONESTONE & EARTHFLESH TAROT

LionHart’s Elements Tarot Challenge Prompt
Question: How can I attune to my internal elements to manifest my best in 2021?
(I had to rephrase this question so that it better suited my needs.)

Wayward Dark Tarot

 Reading Summary: Part of making sure that I am attuned to my internal elements is in finding a balance between the self care and nurturing that I need in my life (pomegranates) and the strength and responsibility that I carry on my shoulders (stag beetle).  To do this, I need to learn how to create some organization and control within my inner narrative so that the negativity does not overwhelm (Princess of Air).

(Note: The first two cards are actually the Three of Cups and Four of Pentacles, but when they landed on the table in this reading, what I saw here were the Empress and the Emperor.  I have not been able to divorce my mind in this reading from feeling that the Empress and Emperor are within these cards and they were read intuitively as such.)

Take Away:  One of the things that sends me out of whack the fastest is when my pessimism and negative inner talk starts to take a front seat.  It screws with my head and tumbles me into overwhelm, and both my responsibilities and my personal self care suffer as a result.   If I want to attune myself to manifest the best 2021 that I can, I need to make sure I keep things in that department in hand, because I need to both ensure I am getting the self care I need, and also not dropping the ball on my responsibilities.

DECK USED:  WAYWARD DARK TAROT

#DiscordTarotolicJan2021 Challenge Prompt
Question: What is something that you miss that you can bring back into your life?

The Deck of the Celestials TarotKing of Cups atop Two of Cups: More quality time with Gideon. More harmony and time together, working together and “feeding” off each other to create a positive and happy synergy.  This is something that the holiday rush took away, and that I didn’t get much of even during my time off after the holiday rush.  It’s something I’ve missed and, as the cards here indicate, is definitely able to be brought back into my life now.

Nine of Pentacles: More gratitude practice. Another thing that had to be set aside for a time during my holiday rush was the morning devotional that I usually do each morning prior to my meditation.  This devotional creates a daily regular opportunity for me to consciously focus upon the things in my life that I am grateful for, and express that gratitude openly.  I have not yet picked back up my daily devotional since the end of the holiday rush, but this gratitude practice is something that would benefit me and is definitely something that it’s time to reestablish now that the mess of the holiday rush is over.

Three of Wands atop The Magician: More confidence and surety in the direction I’ve chosen to go in. I’ve taken a lot of steps over the past year to learn new ways of looking at and handling the balance between my personal needs and my responsibilities, new ways of acknowledging and dealing with my emotions, and new perspectives on how to make space for personal growth.  All this newness creates a sense of unsure footing that can make avoiding backsliding into old habits difficult to avoid. The confidence and sure footed progress I want may be more of an illusion than reality… but the progress itself? It is something that it’s time to bring back into my life now that I am out of the rush and able to focus on my growth once more.

DECK USED:  THE DECK OF CELESTIALS TAROT

Waxing Poetic – The Hanged Man

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The Major Arcana card that identify most strongly with, and what it means to me.

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The Hanged Man reminds me that each hurdle I come upon (of which there have been many, and will surely be many more) is an opportunity for betterment in some way, not a road block.

The card says to me that it’s okay to have a life filled with struggles and hurdles, strife and discord, woe and adversity. These things are lessons in life that teach me how to become better. Better at the things I want to do… Better at the way I find my joy… And, just an all around better person as a whole.

The Hanged Man is a reminder that these things are there not to drag me down and make me miserable. Instead, they are there to create perspective, wisdom, and strength, as well as to foster deeper roots within myself and my life with which to anchor me through the hardest parts, like a tree standing strong in a storm is anchored deep within the soil.

Learning lessons and learning different perspectives is not always pleasant. It’s painful and uncomfortable and extremely awkward. To me the Hanged Man is a representation of how these struggles hold immeasurable worth, if I’m willing to look beyond the discomfort to see what’s waiting there for me to learn.

 

Perspectives

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Today’s meditation was ten minutes and ten seconds long, and focused on staying present and mindful in the moment as a way of developing better concentration and focus not jus in those moments but in life as a whole. Hi

Today’s draw is the twelfth card in the Major Arcana, which is the Hanged Man. This card, like all Major Arcana cards, is a “big picture” card rather than dealing with only one aspect of the human experience. The Hanged Man is my favorite card in the tarot, snd is a representation of taking s step back in order to gain a new perspective.

Today’s card is another push within the currently running theme concerning new perspectives where my family is concerned. I don’t see this as I would a stalker card, where I’m just not getting the message. Instead, the repeat themes using different cards feels more like reminders and encouragement.

I am doing my best to keep an open mind where they are concerned and not allow their past behaviors to influence my perceptions or expectations. This doesn’t mean I am leaving myself wide open to be hurt or abused, only that I’m trying to give them the benefit of the doubt.

Needing a New Perspective

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Today’s meditation was ten minutes and sixteen seconds, and focused on creating space and perspective in times of high stress and emotions.

The message outlined in this guided meditation involved talking a step away and disconnecting with the situation in order to look at it from an observer looking in. During this time you are encouraged to take deep breaths and seek a calm within, so you that you can return to the situation with calm and perspective.

Today’s draw is another double without a jumper as they both emerged together. TWICE prior to this it tried to give me four card readings that I returned to the deck with a request for fewer cards.

The cards in today’s draw are the Four of Pentacles (the Skunk) and the Hanged Man (the Opossum).

My intuitive interpretation of the cards is that they are telling me that in order to feel settled and stable in my life, sometimes it’s important to view the world from a different perspective.

As you know, I spent a HUGE amount of my time in the grip of that fear of losing what I have.  The stability of my home and finances especially.  In a very real way, this is what drives me to work so hard.  Yes, three is some leeway, as I also enjoy my creature comforts, but that just means that I push myself that much harder so that I can have both.

The cards in today’s draw are telling me that if I want that sense of stability, maybe it’s time to start looking for a different perspective (rather than, say, killing myself with work in my current one).

I don’t have a solution for this right now, but I do hear what they’re saying and understand, and it’s something I’m going to have to spend some time thinking about.

Traditionally, the Four of Pentacles is a representation of stability, shelter, structure, taking one’s time to reassess, and in some cases stagnation in the area of one’s resources, creativity, hearth and home, finances, and the physical world.  In the guidebook for this deck, the keywords for the Skunk are confidence, courage, self-esteem, contentment, discretion, and defense.

In the Major Arcana, the Hanged Man is the 12th card, and traditionally represents surrendering and letting go, taking a pause, or finding a new perspective.  Like all Major Arcana cards, this card deals with not one specific aspect of the human experience, but a “bigger picture” aspect.   In the guidebook for this deck, the Opossum’s keywords are patience, introspection, focus, courage, opportunity, and creativity.

Sometimes when I read intuitively, the meanings for the cards will deviate from traditional meanings, but in contemplation of the traditional meanings of the cards drawn to day, as well as the animal meanings provided for this deck, I find that it all is in line with what I’ve already interpreted through my intuitive reading.

Deck Used: The Animism Tarot

 

 

Sink Into It

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Today’s meditation was ten minutes and nine seconds, and focused on the mindset of scarcity.   Struggling with a lack mentality is many times what causes people to overextend, overspend, over-commit, etc.    When in this mindset, always wanting more makes it difficult to be  happy and at peace.

This is a mentality that I personally struggle with quite a lot.  This and the fear of loss are the reasons that I work so much and push myself beyond my limits.  I fear losing my home.  I fear losing my security and comfort.   Having been in the situation where I was without so much, including a place to live for a while, it is what pushes me more than anything else.  And perhaps in some ways, these motivations are a good thing.

But, I DO understand that when that mindset of scarcity takes over, it can become problematic both to one’s physical health as well as mental health.

In the guided meditation, it speaks of a method to remove yourself from this mindset by focusing on gratitude rather than needs.   I think this is a really good message, and I have over the past few months really stepped up in my mindfulness concerning gratitude, although I’m not sure that it is helpful in my issues with scarcity, as gratitude can sometimes makes me feel like I want to hold on tighter to what I have.

This is an ongoing struggle for me and there is no resolution today, just a meandering wander through my thoughts on the matter.

Today’s draw is the 12th card in the Major Arcana, the Hanged Man.   This is a card that is near and dear to my heart, and one of my “deal breaker” cards for a deck.  (Meaning that if I don’t like the Hanged Man card in a deck, chances are very good I don’t and/or won’t want it.)   Like all cards in the Major Arcana, this card deals with one’s experiences as a whole and their journey on the path of life rather than just one aspect of that journey.

The Hanged Man is a representation of change in perspective, and taking a pause to look at something from all angles, as well as surrender and letting go.  In the Major Arcana, I view this card as the one that I most often relate to above all others, as it is the goal of looking at things from multiple perspectives that is one of the tenants of my life.  Life is not one dimensional, and although I may not agree with all view points, I very much want to be able to -see- them, understand them, and then decide for myself whether or not they “fit” for me or if I can take some greater understanding away from them.

The Hanged Man teaches, though, that sometimes in order to adjust your perspective, you must relax and sink into a receptive state of surrender.  If your walls are up, your mind and heart closed, then nothing is gained and nothing will change.  And that is very much a part of what the Hanged Man is all about… personal change.

That openness is the message in today’s card.  Early in the year, I was having a real problem with this.  With everything blocked and clogged up by the depression that slipped away with most of my spring, I remember feeling as if I was far more closed minded than I liked, and I very much disliked that in myself.   It’s not a mindset that I’m very familiar with, as although I am quite stubborn, I have a deep seated need to grasp other’s perspectives and it is one of the main ways in which I better relate to other people, as well as learn and grow.

I have found that lack of flexibility opening up in the months since the depression’s retreat, and the appearance of this card brings a conscious awareness to this aspect of the process of “getting back to myself”.

Deck Used: Student Tarot v5