tarot self care

Self Care Saturday (On a Sunday)

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These Saturday readings are (not usually) bearing in on any one thing or event in my life, as the question used is asking for a more general outlook. This is a self care exercise, and is not meant as a predictive reading… although that, too, happens on occasion.

The question is… What do I need to focus for self-care through the week ahead?

Victorian Romantic Tarot, Magical Menagerie Oracle, Dreamscape Oracle

Earth – Ten of Pentacles atop Queen of Swords, Sow atop Pegasus – Things are good… Make sure that you’re keeping an eye on things so that they stay that way.  Make sure that you approach this watchfulness through a place of nurturing and encouragement towards growth instead of a mindset of perfectionism and rigid idealism.

Air – High Priestess and Firebird – Let your intuition guide you and making plans and strategizing your way forward. Changes to your business are troubling your mind, but your intuition combined with your inner knowledge on how to proceed to your best advantage will keep things on track.  Trust yourself.

Water – Four of Pentacles atop The Moon, Fox – Don’t sit on your laurels. Backsliding is still possible. Use your natural cunning intelligence to plot and plan so that you do not find yourself stalling out and stagnant, as that stagnancy will allow uncertainty to slip in and begin to drag you back down again.

Fire – Page of Cups atop Seven of Pentacles, Cow – Be patient and don’t let your current emotions veer you off your chosen path. Taking your time will allow the wealth and good fortune you seek through your endeavors to come your way. So be sure that you are fostering growth and not looking for immediate gratification.

Waning – Sea Turtle – Just drifting along is not going to work for you any longer.  This doesn’t mean it’s time to be setting out concrete plans, but it means that you need to be prepared and ready to move when the time is right.

Waxing – The Spring – It’s time to focus on healing, hope, and optimism.  Now is the time to allow yourself to climb and to reach for the light that shimmers above.  Use this time to cleanse your inner negativity and seek a healthier outlook and path.

Take Away – Sometimes avoiding stagnancy and backsliding is more about mindset than action, and this week will be one of those weeks.  Make sure you are focusing on the positive and not allowing space for negative inner dialogue to sneak in and gain strength. Remember that you are intelligent, capable, and cunning.  There may be a few hurdles this week concerning your business, but you’ve got this… and you’ll come out the other end all the better if you take time to prepare mentally and physically for the challenges to come.

DECKS USED:  VICTORIAN ROMANTIC TAROT, MAGICAL MENAGERIE ORACLE, DREAMSCAPE ORACLE

Morning Bonus Read – Managing Depression

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Graphic Cheatsheet Playing Cards

Card to represent my depression.

Four of Hearts (Watermelon Bliss) – For a few days in the past week, I found myself at the very bottom of the pit and struggling to stay afloat in the mire that covers the bottom.  But now, I am no longer in that place.  I am still in the pit, and the light is still so very far away, but it is more of a dejected feeling of disinterest than abject misery of soul rotting decay.  Dejection with just a sliver of hope is the current status of my depression.

Something I need to learn about my depression.

Ace of Clubs (Paper Sizes) – The roots of inspiration have no place to dig within the mire of my depression, the soil too loose and heavy like trying to plant seeds within clay or sand.  There is no nutrients to feed those roots, and stability in which to be supported and grow strong.  Inspiration cannot be forced… instead you just wait until you can see the light once more in order to plant those seeds in fertile soil.

An action I can take to help my depression.

Three of Clubs (Sweet Starfruit) – Small steps. Just like taking little nibbles out of a cookie will eventually turn into having ate the entire thing, each small step forward in the darkness will take you a little closer to the light, even when at times you cannot see the light you are moving toward.  Do not allow yourself to stand still and stagnate.  Every small step of self care and healthy choices help you in getting a little closer to the freedom you seek.

How I can show myself more compassion.

Seven of Spades (Waterlily Lake) – Watch out for sneaky inner dialogue slipping in to screw with you when you’re not expecting.  Don’t buy into those lying whispers and negative, snarky judgements that slither through your mind and try to pollute your thinking. You know it’s the depression speaking and not a reflection of reality.

How I can find joy in my life right now.

Four of Spades (Peaceful Droplets) atop Five of Spades (Compassionate Aura) – Set down your anger and your need to strike out, to share your pain in unhealthy ways.  That, too, is your depression trying to control and influence you.  Instead, seek healthy ways to unload your burden and ease your mind so that you can rest more easily without a guilty conscience.

A reason to stay strong.

Ten of Diamonds (The Unknown) – If you give in to the whispers that swirl within you during your depression, you can end up deconstructing every single bit of stability and security you have built up over time for yourself and those that depend upon you.  Instead, stay focused on all that you have accomplished and remember that you are stronger than this… and will make it through to the other side with the help of those you so often help every single day.

DECK USED:  GRAPHIC CHEATSHEET PLAYING CARDS

Morning Bonus Read – Mercury Retrograde

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Under the Roses Lenormand - Mercury Rx Tarot Spread

What is the main theme of this Mercury Retrograde for me?

Clouds – This was actually the card I expected to hop out, as it is very clear that the theme of this Mercury Rx for me is all about the current major depressive episode I am going through from its descent to (we can hope) the beginning of climbing back out again.  I don’t have the expectation that I will be able to pull out of it so quickly, but this card gives me hope that my ascent might begin around the same time as the Mercury Rx comes to an end (around February 21st or there about, if I’m not mistaken).

How am I asked to honor my feelings and current Rx vibes?

Whip – It is important to remember that the self flagellation and dark inner narratives in your head are dangerous.  Respect their power and work on coming out on top by acknowledging their existence.  It is only through awareness that you can overcome their influences.  Stay focused on where you want to go and determined to make your way there as you move through the mire of your depression and you will eventually come out the victor over these challenges.

What am I asked to reflect on throughout Mercury Retrograde?

Crossroads – Now is the time to reflect on your choices.  Where do you want to go from here and how do you want to get there?  You have choices, even now in the middle of your depression.  Are you going to focus on doing the healthy things that will help you to climb out of the pit more quickly? Or sink into the mire and allow it to cradle you and eat away at your insides while it pretends to be comforting you?  You need to keep these things in mind as you go through this struggle so that you can recover as smoothly and easily as possible once the clouded darkness begins to ease its grip.

DECK USED:  UNDER THE ROSES LENORMAND

Self Care Saturday (On a Sunday)

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These Saturday readings are (not usually) bearing in on any one thing or event in my life, as the question used is asking for a more general outlook. This is a self care exercise, and is not meant as a predictive reading… although that, too, happens on occasion.

The question is… What do I need to focus for self-care through the week ahead?

Black Line Tarot, Wild Elemental Oracle, Transforming Dragons

Earth – Seven of Swords and Lion – You can allow others to support you and take on some of the burden while providing the strategy and instruction needed to help them do a good job. Don’t forget that they don’t have to know how to do a job to do it… they just need someone there to guide their steps and keep things on track.

Air – Ten of Pentacles and Bear – Now that you are aware of where you are at in your journey and that the whispering lies are just that… you can begin to move in a direction that will allow transitions to begin. The bear is a symbol of death and rebirth, and you need to remain confident in your footing as you go through the cycle of your depression so that your rebirth will go more smoothly.

Water – The Star and Dragon – A sign of hope and encouragement.  Look toward the light and allow the dragon’s message of strength through adversity to carry you through.  It’s okay to shed tears, as you must purge in order to be reborn again.

Fire – Two of Cups and Ant – If you want to keep things running smoothly with your business right now, you need to make sure that you’re planning things carefully to conserve your energy and keep things balanced while you work through the effects of the depression.  Low energy means low output, so use your energy and your time wisely.

Waning – Pelifo – Don’t allow paranoia and negativity to continue to drag you deeper.  You are aware of what’s going on and the negative inner dialogue is in full swing and very seductive.  Make sure that you keep it in its place and don’t sink into the embrace of those whispers.

Waxing – Cerbeu atop Honcdonk –  Work on connecting with your true and authentic self. Make sure that you are not closing off your emotions, but are instead allowing them to be expressed freely.  Gratitude is important.  Take extra effort in seeing the positive message in your COTD pulls.

Take Away – With awareness comes strength.  You are aware of what is happening and in touch with the fact that your depression is not an emotional illness but a mental one. The mental games depression plays may stir up the emotions, but this is simply a reaction to the mental part of the equation.  Do not allow those emotions to damage you… instead share them and work harder at looking to the positive in the ways you are able.  Do not overwhelm yourself or push yourself too hard right now… it’s okay to go slow.

DECKS USED:  BLACK LINE TAROT, WILD ELEMENTAL ORACLE, TRANSFORMING DRAGONS ORACLE

Morning Bonus Read – Responding to Change

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The prompt for this reading came from one of my Discord servers and is as follows:
“The wheel of the year is tipping away from extreme and closer to balance. Explore this theme with your divination tools with some of the following questions.”

Whimsy Playing CardsWhat in my life is moving toward balance and away from an extreme at this time?

Jack of Diamonds – You are starting to get control over your negative thoughts and bring them back to center. This isn’t so much about the “bringing them back to center” part, which will happen on its own, but in taking that first step of awareness to what is going on and the conscious understanding that that negative inner narrative is your brain lying to you and not a reflection of reality.  As they say, being aware of the problem is the first step.

How is this affecting me mentally?

Six of Diamonds atop Queen of Diamonds – It is allowing kinder thoughts to have room to replace the abusive bitch in your head.  It is allowing you to be more generous with yourself and with what you are going through right now.

How is this affecting me emotionally?

King of Diamonds – It allows you to find the stability that you have been lacking, and see that there is a path forward.  You may not be able to grasp control at this time, but it gives you the ability to plan and strategize, which creates hope and allows you to realize that there is a light at the end of the tunnel even if you can’t see it just yet.

How is this affecting me physically?

Four of Hearts atop Five of Clubs – You are fighting against your need for the things that could help you feel more physically well.  The opportunities to get out and hike, or spend time in nature are being rejected as the depression makes everything feel unappealing.

How can I respond in a healthy way?

Three of Spades – Ride it out.  This is what is happening right now and you know from your past experiences with it that it’s a part of life.  And temporary.  Let it happen, ride it out.

DECK USED:  WHIMSY PLAYING CARDS

Transitioning from January to February

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Your Universe Month End Tarot Spread - January 2021

Individuality – Five of Pentacles Rx and Red Chestnut – You’re trying to pretend that everything is okay and put on a pretty face while in the grasp of your struggle.

Dependence – King of Swords, Oak atop Forget-Me-Not – You need to let go of your control issues for the time being and allow things to flow at their own pace.  Your strength of will and reason combines with your ability to manifest what you want in life is being challenged and you need to take a breath and release some control.  Nobody (living, dead, or otherwise) is going to judge you for that right now.

Creativity – Four of Cups and Aspen Rx – Stop allowing yourself to sink into the seductive feelings of pain and soul rotting darkness.  That embrace is not your friend, but if you allow yourself to wallow within it, it will encourage it to manifest more strongly in your reality and hold on even longer than it already is able.

Limitation – Three of Swords, Baby Blue Eyes, Chamomile – Complacency to the darkness encroaching upon you and the dark thoughts and influences that your mental imbalance.   These negative influences have the ability to take you deeper and deeper if you let them.

Change – King of Wands and Alpine Lily – Fight… even when it feels futile. Your will is strong and you’re a determined force.  It might not feel like fighting against the darkness helps anything, but it does. This is not a fight of brute force, but a battle of will and determination… the kind you are most adept at.

Sympathy – Three of Pentacles and Rosemary Rx – In the past you have resisted allowing people to take your responsibilities off your hand, forcing yourself to keep bearing the full weight upon your shoulders even when in the depths of the pit and surrounded by darkness. You  have learned from this experience that there is a better way.  It can be hard to follow through and allow others to bear some of the weight, but it’s important to your recovery.

Luck – Princess of Swords atop Five of Cups, Manzanita Rx – Remember that you can take what you’ve learned from past experiences and use that to overcome what is going on now. Not being able to find joy or pleasure in what usually brings these things to you is not a failing of yours but simply a symptom of the illness.  You know this… you have learned this… use this knowledge to overcome the negative whispers and dark feelings you are dealing with right now.

Power – The Moon atop Ten of Wands, Bleeding Heart – Don’t drop your burden on the ground, as this will cause uncertainty and problems down the road.  Hand it off to those that love and support you instead.  They are there to help you, they want to support you.  Don’t be so stubborn that you end up putting your responsibilities down so they aren’t being cared for instead of handing them over to those that want to help.

Responsibility – Ten of Cups and Chrysanthemum – You have the opportunity to start climbing to the light and feel good once again, but you have to pull your awareness out of the mire and misery and seek the light.  Don’t forget that it’s there just because you can’t see it right now.

Message from Spirit World / Mind’s World / Known World – This part of the reading takes a lot of focus and concentration to work through and I just can’t manage to get the mental clarity that I need at the moment to do them.  So I’m going to allow myself to skip these three prompts for this month.

Take Away – It is not surprising that the status of my state at this moment is centered around the depression that I’m experiencing.  It is the whole of my world at the moment and the advice here is sound. Let others help me with my responsibilities, keep fighting the depression and seeking the light, and make sure I do not listen to the seductive whispers in the darkness.  I will do my best to follow that advice.

DECKS USED:  HEAVEN & EARTH TAROT, FLOWER ESSENCES DECK VOL 1 & 2