tarot of the hidden realm

A Hole of My Own Making

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Today’s meditation was ten minutes and forty three seconds, and focused on concentration. It had an interesting notation from a scientific journal, which of course I can’t remember the name of right now, that said that in this digital age when everyone is so distracted and pulled in so many different directions all of the time, even a goldfish has better focus than most people.

It encouraged working on developing one’s concentration in order to not just live a more mindful life, but also foster healthy relationships and activities.

Today’s draw is the Five of Pentacles, which Is a representation of tests, trials, and “harshness” in the area of money, resources, and the physical world.

“During the winter months, all living things are challenged to survive until spring.” – Journey Into the Hidden Realms by Barbara Moore

I’ve been a bit more “spendy” The normal lately. It’s pretty much a bit of splurging on myself combined with wiping away some little inconveniences by spending a little bit more to avoid them. Things such as eating out more than usual instead of packing food along, purchasing groceries already partially prepared, skipping trips to the food bank, etc which has been combined with indulgences such as buying brand name foods instead of the generics, purchasing a deck or a book here and there that I would normally have held off on, etc.

As a whole, this behavior has created a bit of a deficit for me and my finances, which in turn inspires a bit of an “oh fuck” mentality.

The five of pentacles is an indication that I need to take a mindful look at the small hole that I’ve dug for myself and am currently sitting in. Remember how I got here, and correct the behavior.

The card’s appearance is also a reminder that, like all things, this too will be temporary and I will move past it in time and recover from it. This may involve the necessity of asking for help, such as requesting my hours to be adjusted at work, getting back in the habit of going to the food bank regularly, and perhaps seeing if J is willing to pitch in for a bit with grocery money.

Mindful Gratitude

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Today’s meditation was ten minutes and twenty eight seconds, and focused on listening. The kind of listening that engages more than just your ears, but also the mind and the heart. Often, people “hear” what others are saying, not just in passing but even in conversations, but they’re too busy plotting their next words or with their minds on something else to actually -listen-. This ability to focus and truly listen is important and even I am guilty of neglecting to do this from time to time.

Today’s draw is the Nine of Cups, which is a card of within the suit of emotions, relationships, imagination, and creativity. The ninth card in this suit represents. fruition, gratitude, contentment, and the consequences that are involved with finding yourself at the end of a journey.

The Ten of Cups speaks to looking back upon the path that you have traveled, and being grateful for where it has brought you.

This is a theme that I have been working on in my life lately. Gratitude and self-care. I have to admit that there’s a bit of a struggle involved. Or… maybe struggle isn’t the right word. It’s more like trying to develop a new habit. You need to remember to mindfully rinse and repeat again and again until it becomes a habit over time.

For me, self-care and being mindfully grateful for the present are the habits that I am trying to instill. I see this card as an encouragement to keep at it, even when I feel frustrated or uninspired.

Hello Stalker Card – The Queen of Swords

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Today’s meditation was 10 minutes and 26 seconds, and focused on fostering patients and acceptance while tending to your chosen path. It discussed the importance of checking in with yourself regularly along the paths that you’ve chosen to take in life, in order to tend to your needs and ensure healthy growth.

Today’s draw is the Queen of Swords, which appears to be the lingering stalker card that followed me out of 2018 and into 2019. I see her often, not just in my daily draws, but also in my spreads, and even my random pulls when in the process of studying different decks. When I slip in the middle of a shuffle? She is the card that falls out of the deck to land face up on the table.

The Queen of Swords is a matriarchal-type authority figure, personality, or energy in the areas of thoughts, logic, communication, and intuition. She represents independence and truth, with a receptivity that indicates a seeking of (and discerning of) truth through a willingness to entertain the influence of added perspectives and a wider view that will then allow for cutting through the bullshit.

I have a lot of self-doubt and uncertainty when it comes to my skills of communication. Not just face to face, but just in general. Whether it’s in person or online, I seem to have an excessive amount of instances where things I say are taken the “wrong way” or twisted to mean something they did not.

Because of this, I’ve hurt people. I’ve been attacked by people. I’ve lost friends and made enemies. It happens, but it seems to -always- be because of my communication skills. And, over the years, I’ve withdrawn more and more over time from communicating with others. When I -do- communicate, it’s careful. It’s…. ugh, it’s like adding a bunch of fluff to the outside of a ball to make it softer for the other person’s hands to catch? I hope that made sense.

The repeated appearance of the Queen of Swords is telling me to knock it off. Cut the fluff and be the blunt communicator that I’ve always been. Those that know me know I’m not attacking them, just being blunt and to the point. What does it really matter what others think as long as I can communicate and be myself with the ones I care about?

Lifting the Veil

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Today’s meditation was 10 minutes and 34 seconds, and focused on the positive aspects of humility over ego, focusing on how one can enrich their lives by being grateful rather than with a mentality of entitlement.

I find this type of guided meditation not to be a focus for the day, so much as a “touchstone” of sorts. Something to view and absorb, agree with or contemplate, and in doing so these topics because a part of you. I like that.

Today’s draw is the Ten of Cups, which is a representation of endings and transcendence (and occasionally excess) in the areas of emotions, creativity, relationships, and imagination.

This card’s appearance today is a reminder to be grateful for what you have. This is not necessarily something that is difficult for me to do, but what IS difficult is to realize today’s contentment, and in the process allowing myself to let go of that iron grip I have on pushing forward. It is as if with the drive to push, push, push onward and forward towards my goals, a veil drops over the present, hiding it from my view.

That is the message from the Ten of Cups in today’s draw. It’s okay to push ahead, but not so hard that you miss the things in your life right now that make you content and happy.

Lift the veil that ambition and drive use to obscure the present and be grateful for the road you’ve trod, and the lessons you’ve learned. Carry that knowledge forward with you, along with the contentment and pleasure you have within the present moment.

Exploration and Creativity

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Today’s meditation was curtailed by the fact that I spent the majority of my day sitting behind a steering wheel in bumper to bumper traffic.  I didn’t have enough time to get it done before leaving the house and I’m pretty sure when I try before bed I’m going to doze off.

Today’s draw is the Page of Cups. Pages are the representation of an omega-type energy, personality, or person seated in the position of a learner or explorer. The suit of Cups represents creativity, emotion, instinct, and relationships.

The appearance of the Page of Cups in today’s draw is an encouragement to set my curiosity free and allow myself room to explore and experiment.

Although physically this didn’t really get much play, mentally I did a good deal of contemplation on ideas concerning everything from new jewelry designs and wire wrapping ideas, to additions and edits to my tarot journal, and roleplay ideas for our writing.

I didn’t get the chance to immerse myself in these ideas as the appearance of this card would suggest, but I definitely have a great number of ideas for exploration later.

A little off topic?   But I think the depiction on this card looks like C.  Different color hair, but there’s something in the face that just reminds me of her.

Changing Focus

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Today’s meditation was ten minutes and forty four seconds, and focused on the concept of Pura Vida.  This is (apparently) a common phrase used in Costa Rica for all kinds of things such as greetings, goodbyes, saying how you are, wishing someone well, etc.  It embodies the mentality of living one’s life purely, gratefully, and joyfully.

Today’s draw is the King of Swords, which is a strong alpha energy, personality, or person in the area of the mind, logic, thought, and communication.  In other words, he is the representation of authority and intellectual strength, fairness and reason.

The King of Swords appearance today is a reminder to pull myself out of the creativity side of things that I have been immersed in this weekend (I’m finally fully caught up on my tarot journal!), and get back to business.

Surprisingly, for this time of year, I had really decent sales over the weekend while I was “on hiatus” from doing business work and have instead been wallowing in more creative endeavors such as finishing catching up on the tarot journal and doing a couple of deck modifications.   Today is the day I need to bear down and get to work, and set my mind to the business of running a business.