tarot for self care

The Power of Manifestation

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At the moment, I’m playing catch up after having not kept up on my blog posts for a few days, so I don’t remember what the meditation was like today… or if I did it, to be honest.   I will return to updating about my meditation each day once I’m caught up with my posts again.

Tarot of Haunted House - Eight of PentaclesToday’s draw is the Eight of Pentacles, which is traditionally a representation of harmony and expertise built over time through hard work and the honing of one’s skills.  It’s about manifestation through these skills, and work with one’s hands to create one’s masterpiece.

What really stands out to me in the imagery of this card today is the pentacles themselves and their positioning within the air above where the woman kneels in her circle.   She has honed her skills of manifestation and is in the middle of doing a boon spell. She has worked on this craft, done all of the physical labor, and with the skills she has honed she has become strong enough to manifest abundance in a very physical way.

Today’s card is a reminder of what I can do… of the fact I have this ability.  Not to create coins out of mid-air, but rather to take an idea and make it into a reality.  To spin an idea into physical reality is a skill of creativity and creation, and a blessing to cherish and enjoy instead of simply exploit.

DECK USED:  TAROT OF HAUNTED HOUSE

LionHart’s #TheOctoberTarot #SeasonOfTheWitchChallenge Prompt
Question: What should I keep in my mind when working with the other side?

Ghosts & Spirits Tarot

Reading Summary: Stay grounded (Four of Pentacles) and don’t linger (The Chariot) or things can start to fall apart fast (The Tower).

Take Away:  This is an echo of the reading I did yesterday that was a very similar question.  It’s a warning that when I am working with the other side I need to be in a grounded place of control.  In order to avoid chaos and disaster, it’s important to make sure I’m in the right place to be working with the other side, and able to get “in and out” quickly and smoothly while maintaining control.

DECK USED:  GHOSTS & SPIRITS TAROT

#DiscordTarotholicsOct2020 Challenge Prompt
Question: What echos from the past are trying to resurface for me right now?

Nightmare Before Christmas TarotReading Summary: Dad (The Devil and Six of Potions) trying to come back and tell me (Six of Candles under Six of Potions) what living my life should look like (Ten of Pentacles).

Take Away: This is the “cheer up and be a man” message that my father always had ready and waiting for me.  “A man” being a provider and the strong foundation of a fruitful family.  My father loves to try and rise up at this time of year and bring with him his whispers from the past, although I am grateful that these aren’t the worst whispers he’s ever shouted at me back when he was alive.

Still, with the fact that I feel like I’m lacking motivation this year, I really don’t feel like his input is productive, but more of a thorn in my already sore side.

DECK USED:  NIGHTMARE BEFORE CHRISTMAS TAROT

#MysticStarChallenge October Challenge Prompt
Question: How do I embrace my message?

Nicoletta Ciccoli Tarot

Reading Summary: Look at all the blue in these cards.  It spreads through the entire reading, and is only missing from the second card where pink shades tie in that card to the rest instead. Pink is independence.  Blue is calm and poise.

Card 1 – Hiding behind one’s independence in an effort to seize control and use it to create a solitary graceful strength away from the fear of other’s judgements.

Card 2 – Here is the solitary graceful strength.  Independence without censure.

Card 3 – Insidious whispers from outside sources.  Sitting atop one’s independence and begin resentful of those whispers, which creates negative feelings.

Card 4 – Very little independence.  That resentment from Card 3 has stolen the ability to fight back and the independence you seek.

Card 5 – Trying to seize control of a situation involving conflict. This situation feels out of control as you try to reign back in the independence lost.

Card 6 – Wearing your independence once more and at rest and ease now that it is once again back in your possession.

Take Away: The cards here indicate that to embrace this message of support I need to set myself free (second card) of the fear and worries (first card) of insidious whispers and influences (third card) sneaking up and taking me by surprise ambush (fourth card).

Whether I am calm and collected (last card), or fully aware and trying to seize control (fifth card)… what is coming is inevitable (water represented in both cards) and it is best to try and move forward into it with calm and poise (all the blue throughout the spread).

DECK USED:  NICOLETTA CICCOLI TAROT

#ConnectWithYourDeckChallenge by E Roebuck-Jones
Question: What do past lives mean to me?

Luis Royo's Dark Tarot

Reading Summary: You build up the physical within your life (King of Pentacles) which is then stolen away (Seven of Swords) as you are set free to join lost loved ones (Three of Cups) and the soul then can start again with prior knowledge it has earned (Knave of Wands).

Take Away:  This is about reincarnation.  It’s about how during our lives on earth, we have a habit of focusing too much on the physical.  Then when the physical is yanked away, we are left with a clear understanding of what’s left behind and what we’ve learned.  This knowledge is not conscious, but resides in the soul and is then carried forward into a new cycle.

DECK USED:  LUIS ROYO’S DARK TAROT

Morning Bonus Read – Dark Year Spread

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The Vampire TarotWhat is dying away, sloughing off, departing?
Five of Wands

My enthusiasm for the fight.  I haven’t had that spark of fire this season that usually rides me so hard.  That lack of enthusiasm makes it hard to push forward and has caused a slackening of motivation.

How can I lovingly support this transition?
Six of Cups atop Seven of Wands

These cards are not about supporting the transition.  They’re about supporting myself through a time of discomfort and reminding myself that I need to stay in the present and not allow the past and my past experiences to force me into unpleasant situations.   A lot of my motivation comes from those past experiences, and so this is also about acceptance.

What will this death make way for? What’s looking to be born or reborn?
Six of Pentacles

I really dislike this feeling of lack of motivation, but what this death is trying to make room for is a the ability to be more generous with myself and others.  This is about having the awareness of where I am, what I need from others, and what I can offer in turn.  Thus, putting me more in touch with what’s going on around me instead of within my own life from only my own perspective.

DECK USED: THE VAMPIRE TAROT

Take Care of Yourself

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Today’s meditation was skipped, unfortunately, because I got a bit of a late start after the farm.  Or rather, I ended up staying a bit longer at the farm this morning than planned, and it screwed the rest of my morning schedule.  I did manage to still get my flu shot tho, and made it to my Aunt’s only about an hour late, so it wasn’t an entire wash.

Madam Lydia Wilhelmina's Tarot - Ten of WandsToday’s draw is the Ten of Wands, which is traditionally interpreted as running into overwhelm or burnout in the pursuit of your passion projects and other endeavors. It is about taking on too much responsibility, about having too much on your plate, and about feeling over-burdened.

This is a very apt card for today, as today’s major project for today was about going over to my aunt’s new apartment in the city and helping to move all of her belongings out of the moving container (you know, like one of those big metal shipping containers) and into her apartment.  This also ended up including the assembly of a couple pieces of furniture that she needed help putting together, and helping her get a few of the essential boxes unpacked.

The sharp tips on the ends of the wands in this imagery are especially apropos, as I feel that the message in this card today is about making sure that I don’t over do it to the point that I end up hurting myself (sharp pointed spears) in the process. 

Today’s card was a perfectly timed reminder to make sure I would take care of myself today.

DECK USED:  MADAM LYDIA WILHELMINA’S TAROT

LionHart’s #TheOctoberTarot #SeasonOfTheWitchChallenge Prompt
Question: How can I best work with the thinning veil this year?

Gothic Horror Tarot

Reading Summary: Take a position of strength (Queen of Staves) and gratitude (Nine of Cups), of grounded fulfillment  (Ten of Pentacles) about having made good choices that got you to where you’re at (The Lovers)…. only then can you work with others on the other side of the veil safely (Three of Coins).

Take Away: This is about making sure that I am “well seated” both emotionally and in the physical word and confident in where I’m at prior to reaching out to work with the other side.  It’s about more than just being grounded, but about being in a place of strength, confidence, and power. 

DECK USED:  GOTHIC HORROR TAROT

#DiscordTarotholicsOct2020 Challenge Prompt
Question: Energy I’m emitting / What that energy is attracting / What to do about it

Grim TarockEnergy I’m Emitting – The Hanged Man – Open and observant.  Quiet and willing to take my time when needed to understand things from different angles.  Non-biased and able to take in different viewpoints without losing perspective.

What That Energy Is Attracting – Ten of Fish – People are drawn to this as it feels safe and soothing. It makes me approachable even when perhaps I’m not as skilled as I’d like to be in communication and other interpersonal aspects.

What To Do About It – King of Chaos – Do nothing. The repercussions would suck for yourself and for others.  Chaos is just not comfortable or something you really want too much of in your life.

DECK USED:  GRIM TAROCK

#MysticStarChallenge October Challenge Prompt
Question: What message do my other Guides need to tell me?

Trick or Tarot

Reading Summary: My spirit guides say that they see that I’m moving forward in my business (Page of Wands) and that I’m not just capable (The Magician) but also highly skilled (Eight of Pentacles).

Take Away: They are all on my side and being my cheer-leading team, letting me know that I’ve got this.  It’s okay to feel overwhelmed, but they are reminding me that I’m strong and capable and in my element and if I just go with it, everything will be fine.

DECK USED:  TRICK OR TAROT

#ConnectWithYourDeckChallenge by E Roebuck-Jones
Question: What does shadow/darkness mean to me?

Tarot de Marseille par Pole Ka

Reading Summary: The influence that creates bad choices (Lovers Rx), the self recriminations and inner dialogue that drags me under into depression and retreat (The Hermit Rx), and the emotional mess that spills out to damage my ability to relate to others (Queen of Cups Rx).

Take Away:  Shadows and darkness are, in my perspective, the influences and decisions that create a situation of isolation and depression.

DECK USED:  TAROT DE MARSEILLE PAR POLE KA

Morning Bonus Read – Refocus Tarot Spread

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Because I am trying to show a bit more of my decks this month, as I have a whole LOT of October/Halloween/Samhain decks, I’m doing a few extra bonus reads over the month.  This is one of those extra readings.

Refocus Tarot Spread - Catton Candy Nightmare Tarot

Why do I feel unfocused right now?
Ten of Pentacles Rx

Because my stability feels a bit shaky and uprooted.  The thing is, this time of year is a transition period for me between the summer’s endeavors (that this year were primarily self-focused and personal) and the holiday rush (which is entirely business focused and entrepreneurial).  It’s not surprising that the shift from one to the other would make me feel unsteady, and thus a bit unfocused.

What is distracting me from my soul’s true path?
Judgement

Me.. being a dick… to myself.  I’m working on combating this as best that I can, but that dark snarl that likes to whisper nasty shit in my ear is definitely working overtime at the moment.

What requires my focus right now that I am neglecting?
Eight of Cups

I’ve had a lot of reminders lately about making sure I’m leaving the shit that isn’t working from me behind.  Here, again, we see that reminder that I need to keep my eye on where I want to go and not on how I  used to do things.   There’s a lot of temptation right now to fall into bad habits from my past, so these constant reminders are understandable and appreciated.

How can I release distractions and refocus on what matters most?
The Hanged Man Rx

Stop allowing hesitation to rule my actions and thoughts.  I’m being told to jump in and “adjust on the fly” as I move forward instead of hanging back with worries while trying to test the waters before jumping in.  Procrastination is not my friend right now.

Who or what can help me stay focused?
Ace of Wands

I need to get back in touch with that creative inner spark and the joy that it gives me to manifest ideas into physical items that bring pleasure to others.  This is my own pleasure and my purpose, and is something that I’ve lost touch with a bit off and on this year.

How can I benefit from realigning and refocusing?
Five of Cups Rx

It will allow me to move on and move forward instead of hanging back dealing with emotions that have no use or purpose for me at this time.

DECK USED:  CATTON CANDY NIGHTMARE TAROT

Claiming Control

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IMG_7119Today’s meditation was ten minutes long and another guided meditation with interval timer.  The guided meditation today also included a chime which was intended to help keep the mind returning to the present and the breath.  This is because the topic of the guided meditation was just that.

That is to say, the topic was about sinking into the present and not allowing fixation with the past or the future to diminish your pleasure in the moment.  The thing is?  Most of humanity has a tendency to do just that.  To either get lost in thoughts of the past and memories, or distracted by plans for the future and daydreams.   These distractions take our mind away from the present, and make it difficult to fully enjoy all that the present has to offer.

Part of mindfulness meditation is the effort to train your mind to spend more time in the present, so that we can then carry that mindfulness of the present forward outside of meditation and into your day to day lives.

Tarot of Haunted House - Queen of WandsToday’s draw is the Queen of Wands, which is a receptive alpha energy, personality or person in the area of one’s drive, passionate interests, enthusiasms, and willpower.  This often translates into themes that have to do with determination, confident independence, and strong figures that encourage the drive and ambitions of others.

One of the lesser known interpretations of the Queen of Wands lies in the concept of dominant sensuality, as in the blend of dominance and sensuality.   And that is what I see in the imagery of this card today.  I see a confident woman filled with strength and aware of her power and allure.   I see control in her hold on the trident of flames, and sensuality in the piano behind her (that might be just me because of my synesthesia).

The message here is about owning your power.  It’s about knowing your strengths and playing to them instead of disregarding them as useless or yourself as unworthy.  The message in this card is about making sure I know to step into tomorrow with confidence and determination, and place myself through my behavior and my inner strength in a place of power and control… thus owning that control rather than allowing my aunt to have it.

DECK USED:  TAROT OF HAUNTED HOUSE

LionHart’s #TheOctoberTarot #SeasonOfTheWitchChallenge Prompt
Question: Ask your cards for something you are destined to explore or face. Draw as many cards as you see fit. Set an affirmation and conclude your reading with “… and so it is.”

Murder of Crows TarotSomething I am Destined to Explore/Face

When I look in the mirror, what do I see?  Do I see the man that I am now? Or the child I used to be?  (Six of Cups)
When I step into my entrepreneurial spark and allow it to fill my focus and time, do I carry with me the strength of the man I am?  Or do I hear my father’s cruel bark? (Ace of Wands)
Instead of listening to that voice of old, it’s time to learn a different way. I need to find the optimism I’ve lost and a way to inject joy into my work… something I had always been discourage from doing in my youth. (The Sun)

Affirmation

By collaborating with others, they bring support into the equation, and allow room to foster joy.  Let them help.  Let them provide that spark of pleasure, and allow them to give me the space I need to breathe and lighten my heart that had once been caged.   So it will be…. and thus so it is.

DECK USED:  MURDER OF CROWS TAROT

#DiscordTarotholicsOct2020 Challenge Prompt
Topic: Do Spread #1
Question: How can I give myself more space for my emotions, even during the busy time?

Curio TarotReading Summary: This is a learning process (The Hierophant).

The two left cards look into the past, but the wand in the center leans into the future. This speaks to me about how my lack of motivation (Four of Cups) and the desire to bump that motivation into high gear (Queen of Wands) both live in the past, but the practical advice on actually moving forward into my goals and allowing my emotions to have their own space does not lie back there, it lives in the future (tip of the wand in the Queen of Wands pointing to the right).

There is a hint of blue in the first two cards, one over the cup being ignored, and one upon the forehead of the Queen.  This blue feels like the scars my past treatment of myself have created both on my emotions (the cup) as well as my inner dialogue (Queen’s head).

The Hierophant looks into the future and leans in that direction… but his hand is palm up in the direction of the past, as if to indicate that the past needs to be held back or to be given a pause.

Take Away:  To give myself room to feel my emotions (even during the busy time) I need to leave my past in the past. This applies to my past habits, but also the treatment and events that taught me those habits in the first place.  It’s only by allowing the past to be in the past.  This isn’t about burying the past, but rather about accepting where it should live.

DECK USED:  CURIO TAROT

#MysticStarChallenge October Challenge Prompt
Question: How will the lesson of staying focused on balance, instead of allowing old habits of overworking to have free reign, impact my life?

Hephoe Tapo

Reading Summary: It will allow me to have more focus on my work (Eight of Pentacles) without it damaging my intuitive abilities (High Priestess Rx)… which in turn will allow me to find a more stable center (Queen of Pentacles) and move forward towards my ambitions with clarity (Knight of Swords).

Take Away:  When I overwork myself, it has a habit of fizzling out a good portion of my intuitive side.   Things begin to feel unstable and I begin to feel lost and off center like I’m fumbling around drunk in the dark.

By staying focused on balance instead of allowing old work habits to rise up and take control, it gives me the opportunity to avoid being overwhelmed even while I continue with my work, allowing me to have that intuitive connection, stability, and direction that is lacking when I am flirting with burnout.

DECK USED:  HEPHOE TAPO

#ConnectWithYourDeckChallenge by E Roebuck-Jones
Question: How important is my spiritual altar to me?

Trionfi della Luna

Reading Summary: It’s more of a reminder of tradition (The Hierophant), than something that I use all the time (Three of Swords). But, it has its place in my journey and in keeping me grounded, as well as in making me feel that I have what I need (Nine of Coins).

Take Away:  I don’t use my altar all that often.  I mean… daily for my daily devotional, but I don’t really need an altar to do that devotional.  Aside from my devotional?  I don’t use it at all actually. My spellcraft is not done at my altar, my research and studies are not done there either, nor do my rituals take place there other than the already mentioned daily devotional.

Ultimately, it is a beautiful spot that is a soothing display of my faith and my values.  I enjoy it and the centered and grounded feeling that standing before it provides, and its beauty as well… but I wouldn’t call it necessary.

DECK USED:  TRIONFI DELLA LUNA

Self Care Saturday (On a Sunday)

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These Saturday readings are (not usually) bearing in on any one thing or event in my life, as the question used is asking for a more general outlook. This is a self care exercise, and is not meant as a predictive reading… although that, too, happens on occasion.

The question is… What do I need to focus for self-care through the week ahead?

The Abandoned Oracke, Mildred Payne's Pocket Oracle, Kult Divinity Lost Tarot, Ludy Lescot Tarot

Earth – Queen of Cups, The Beggar, Pentacle – Sometimes, to get what you need, you have to tug on people’s heartstrings. Manipulation has its place in life, and if you’re using it wisely and kindly, it can help yourself and others in positive growth. Make sure before you move to use this type of tactic that you are using it for the right reasons and that it doesn’t niggle at your moral compass.

Air – Nine of Cups, The Beast, Arrow, Fish – Don’t allow worries about losing your progress and pessimism for the future to disrupt the positive growth you have going on and the potential for positive future progress still on the horizon. Keep your “eye on the ball” and stay positive.

Water – Six of Swords atop Ace of Pentacles, Revenge, Harp – Do not allow yourself to pick yourself apart over lost opportunities that you chose to walk away from.  Some of those lost opportunities may come into sharper focus this week, as will the choices that you made that ended up making those opportunities “lost”.  Instead of falling into the tempting habit of abusing yourself for these choices and missed opportunities, chose a more serene and forgiving approach.

Fire – Eight of Pentacles, The Sculpture, Frog –  Negativity is really working hard this week to slip in and taint your view of your skills and your work. Doubts and insecurities are the dark secret you hold in your heart. Take care not to let these feelings bleed into your creative works. It can happen just as happiness and optimism can, and just as all the positive intentions can, if you allow it.  Take care that you are watchful and making sure only good goes into those pieces you make.

Waning – Togarini and Yesod – The Yesod card hearkens back to the advice given in the Fire position of this spread.  The advice here is to focus upon moving away from bullying myself into moving forward into creative endeavors when I’m not feeling it, and thus polluting these endeavors with avarice and dark feelings of discontent.  It is better to step away than put out negativity into the world through the pollution of my my art.

Waxing – Anthropos and Nahemoth – The Anthropos card is a sign of an internal awakening and with the Death Angel card atop of it what is seen here is the advice that if I wish to purge the corruption in my energy, I need to get out into nature more. I don’t think I got enough time out in the forest over the summer months, and it is creating an underlying effect that is hidden but there.  Make sure to take some time this week to get out into nature and allow the natural energies there to flow through your own to cleans out the fog and cobwebs.

Take Away – The message this week is a repeat of what I have heard from the cards again and again over the past few days.  It’s about staying positive and not allowing my negative inner dialogue to seep in and screw with my head or my creativity.  On top of this warning, there is also a reminder that my connection with the earth and nature is the way to clear out and loosen internal knots and the fog of negative influences within myself.  I need to make sure I utilize this connection this week.

DECKS USED: LUDY LESCOT TAROT, KULT DIVINITY LOST TAROT, THE ABANDONED ORACLE, MILDRED PAYNE’S POCKET ORACLE