Self Care Saturday (On a Sunday)

These Saturday readings are (not usually) bearing in on any one thing or event in my life, as the question used is asking for a more general outlook. This is a self care exercise, and is not meant as a predictive reading… although that, too, happens on occasion.

The question is… What do I need to focus for self-care through the week ahead?

Tarot of Many Doors, Earth Force Insight Cards, Morning Calm Oracle

EarthReader of Potions, Dance, Breath – This week needs to be about nurturing your health and finding balance through incorporation of your meditative practice and mindfulness. It’s easy to forget in the return to balance and seeking of the light, in the striving and struggle of everyday life, that your body needs love too.  Make sure that you fit in your meditation this week, get yourself out into the fresh air to enjoy the beauty and grounding comfort of nature, and give yourself the fuel and rest it craves rather than continuing bad habits.

AirTen of Dice, Hope, Seven Directions – Transformation and finding peace are strong motivators for you this week.  Allow yourself to stay at a slower pace, allow yourself to focus on  more than work.  In doing this you give your inner dialogue and mental health a chance to appreciate the light it’s moving towards, to savor your recovery, and enjoy more fully coming back into a place of comfort and security.

WaterNine of Dice, Compassion, Transition – The theme of transition continues in the emotional waters of your life with a reminder to be compassionate to yourself and allow the changes that are developing to continue to flourish.  Practicing gratitude during this time can help this along, as it will bring what is positive in your life and your accomplishments along the way into focus, creating feel-good feelings that can help you in continuing in a forward trajectory.

FireFour of Dice, Gentle, Cycles – Slow and steady.  Make sure as you’re feeling better that you’re not piling too much on your plate at once.  Feeling better after feeling horrible for so long can make it feel like you can take in the world, but instead you need to take things slow and easy, and give yourself lots of security and stability with each step back toward “normal” you take.  Everything has it’s own time to shine and you don’t have to rush.  In fact, it’s better if you don’t.

WaningDivine Love – Don’t dip too deeply into the spiritual connection stuff this week.  Getting to know your guides and that slow progress you’ve been making in this direction is great, but now isn’t the week to set your focus in that direction.  Avoid readings that will cast your gaze in that direction and instead just focus what’s right before you.

WaxingBalance – Seek out where you feel imbalances taking root and work on setting them into balance this week. Finding that balance will allow you to retain your peace and obtain greater clarity.  Don’t allow yourself to sway too far one way or another, even when it feels that imbalance may be useful to you in the moment.

Take Away – The cards make it clear that this week needs to focus on the now.  Mindfulness and balance need to take priority over willfulness or other distractions.  You’re not out of the woods yet, but you’re approaching the edge of the pit.  Allow yourself time to feel good, to appreciate and enjoy feeling better.  That first kiss of sunlight is always the best.

DECKS USED:  TAROT OF MANY DOORS, EARTH FORCE INSIGHT CARDS, MORNING CALM ORACLE

A Glimmer of Imagination

Today’s meditation was skipped because I fell asleep and took a nap instead.  Not that I meant to, but that’s what ended up happening.

Tarot Art Nouveau and Thera-Pets Emotional Support Animal CardsToday’s draw is the Ace of Swords, which is traditionally a representation of the seed of new beginnings in the area of one’s intellect, logic, thought, and communication. This can often present in themes that have to do with new ideas, new was of communicating with others, new educational pursuits, etc.

In the imagery here, a man falls from the sky as the night looks on and watches him fall.  Wind swirls wildly about and perhaps it will pick the man that falls up and toss him around like a kite, giving him a chance to fly instead of plummet to the earth.

Sometimes new ideas need a bit of imagination mixed in to make them just right, and that’s the message I get from the imagery in this card today. Combined with the Thera-Pets card, this is a reminder that although I may not be feeling particularly imaginative or inventive at the moment, just a little glimmer of imagination showing through now and then is enough.  It’s still progress out of the pit… and even the smallest progress will keep me from becoming stagnant in my recovery.

DECK USED:  TAROT ART NOUVEAU AND THERA-PETS EMOTIONAL SUPPORT ANIMAL CARDS

The Marching Into Darkness Tarot Challenge Prompt
Question
: Thinking back to times when I had a good thing but self-sabotaged, what kept me from embracing & enjoying these times?

Tarot of the Sevenfold Mystery

Reading Summary: Thinking that I can handle (Hermes – The Magician) much more than I can, and ending up juggling (Two of Pentacles) too much, then having to cut back when things get out of hand (Eight of Wands).

Take Away:  This is about my tendency to overfill my plate with responsibilities, when I am feeling good and in control.  Then something happens that leaves me having to cut back on things, drop the ball on others, etc. This tendency creates a cycle of self sabotage where I end up with a crapload of things unfinished and piling up in the background, or abandoned entirely.

DECK USED:  TAROT OF THE SEVENFOLD MYSTERY

#DiscordTarotolicsMar2021 Challenge Prompt
Question
: What makes me unique?

Tarot Art NouveauReading Summary: Taking my mothers influence (Three of Swords) and the qualities that I share with her (Queen of Swords Rx), and turning into into something positive (Nine of Pentacles).

Take Away: I would say that this is not the only thing that makes me unique, but rather is one of a variety of different things.   The thing is though, that this specific example does outline a quality of independence that I have always possessed.

I do things my way and make them work for me, and turn them into something positive that I can look back on and be grateful for.  I do this again and again, using my disappointment in my mother to take the qualities I share with her and turn them into something better.

DECK USED:  TAROT ART NOUVEAU

#ConnectWithYourDeckChallenge by E Roebuck-Jones
Question: How am I blocking my intuition?

Tarot of the Sevenfold Mystery

Reading Summary: You spend too much time worrying about becoming your mother, and not enough time spent grounding.

Take Away:  This is funny because the cards also mentioned this exact topic above in the previous reading. It’s about spending too much time focusing on uncertainty and instability, though.  It’s about making sure that I focus on making sure my own life is stable and secure instead of worrying about what has been left behind. That energy could be placed elsewhere to better use.

DECK USED:  TAROT OF THE SEVENFOLD MYSTERY

Daily Self Kindness

I napped.  Okay so I nap a few times a week but this was a really good nap. And earlier than normal, so I also got to spend extra time with Gideon as well.

Morning Bonus Read – The Guides

1870 Cartes a Jouer du Belles Cartes LtdWhat are my guides most proud of me for at this time?
Seven of Hearts, Queen of Diamonds, Seven of Spades

They are proud of me for prioritizing finding a nurturing balance despite my constant struggle to downgrade how much responsibility I’m putting on my plate and my feeling as if I’m doing something wrong when I take time for self care and rest.

How can I continue to garner that pride?
Jack of Diamonds

Slow and steady but always forward.  It’s important to look for new ways to look at and put into action these new priorities.  Don’t just set them on the back burner or tuck them in a corner to think about or worry about later.  Keep them at the forefront even when progress is slow.

What advice do they have for me emotionally?
Two of Hearts

Connecting with others will help in continuing to lift me up and keep me balanced.  Don’t allow myself to close myself off to others and the emotional support that they have to offer.  Each of the people in your life that makes up your support system has their unique skills and influences that can benefit you just as yours benefit them in turn.

What advice do they have for me mentally?
Three of Spades

Don’t allow your depression to suck you backward. You’re making progress, moving away from the darkness and pain of the pit you’d slid into.  Don’t look back.

What advice do they have for me physically?
Ace of Spades

Be open to new ideas on how to incorporate activity into your life.  The whole knife-through-the-foot thing has slowed you down and will keep you from doing the harder trails and more intensive hiking you’re used to, but that doesn’t mean you can’t go out on easy paths and spend time communing with nature in these more “beginner” ways while you heal.

DECK USED:  1870 CARTES A JOUER DU BELLES CARTES LTD

An Essential Presence

IMG_9703Today’s meditation was just over nineteen minutes long and was the next installment of the Meditation Mantra course being offered on the Oak app. The meditation began today with a bit of visualization first to help in times when getting into meditation can be a bit of a struggle.  I didn’t really enjoy the visualization part all that much, but I did find the rest of the meditation very relaxing and it continues to appear that the longer meditations I’ve been doing over the past week are something  respond better to.

Gregory Scott Tarot and Thera-Pets Emotional Support Animal CardsToday’s draw is the Ten of Pentacles, which is about moving beyond being content and satisfied in the area of one’s finances, manifestations, and physical world and moving on to sharing that good fortune with those closest to you so that it becomes something all can relish in and enjoy.

The family portrait aspect of this card is very original and interesting to me, and in the center you see the strength of the man who shares his wealth with his family.  This… is me. The safety and security I have made in my home life, financial life, and comfort I’ve built is shared with my sister and with Z.  Under my roof, they are also secure and cared for, comfortable and feel safe.  It is my role in this home to be the one that creates this… that earns this… and sustains it.

That theme ties in strongly with the Thera-Pets card for today, as it too speaks of how my presence matters, and the message here today is to remember not to take for granted that I matter to others.  I matter to them emotionally, and also on the physical plane.

DECK USED:  GREGORY SCOTT TAROT AND THERA-PETS EMOTIONAL SUPPORT ANIMAL CARDS

The Marching Into Darkness Tarot Challenge Prompt
Question
: What unhealthy habits am I holding onto that hinder my growth and progress towards my goals?

Whimsical Tarot

Reading Summary:  The unhealthy habits in question aren’t thoughtlessly done, but rather they are done through making bad choices.  Bad… and conscious choices (The Lovers Rx).   This bad and conscious choice lies within my denial (Four of Cups) and my refusal to allow others to help (Three of Pentacles Rx).

Take Away:  This is about my depression and how my initial reaction is to pretend to the world like everything is fine when it’s really not, and refusal to allow others in to help me in my responsibilities.  Although I am working on this, I did briefly fall into that habit again with this last MDE.  I realized it, and eventually fought against it and forced myself to do things in a more healthy (and open) way.  It might be that this unhealthy habit is something that only repeated practice can truly break me of, but you’ll have to forgive me if I’d rather put off the next MDE for as long as I possibly can.

DECK USED:  WHIMSICAL TAROT

#DiscordTarotolicsMar2021 Challenge Prompt
Question
: How can I improve upon where I am mentally over the week ahead?

Gregory Scott TarotReading Summary:  Focus on the good and what makes you happy (Ten of Cups) instead of on your depression (Three of Swords).  Let go of your worries and anxiety (Nine of Swords).

Take Away: Worries and anxiety have been the theme of the past few days as I prepared for this whole border crossing thing.  The thing is that I used to do this all the time yeah? But I haven’t crossed in a year now, and with Covid there’s so many restrictions and extra paperwork and policies and… god it’s just hugely stressful.

The cards here also indicate that it’s now time to let go of the darkness of my depression. allow it to fade into the background as the light becomes brighter the higher out of the pit  I manage to climb. It has been my focus for a long time, self monitoring my progress and making sure I’m still moving and not stagnant.  The cards here indicate that is no longer necessary and to focus more fully on the light now instead of what I’m leaving behind.

DECK USED:  GREGORY SCOTT TAROT

Daily Self Kindness

I wanted to skip my meditation today and get on the road, but I made myself do it because I knew it would help my anxiety about crossing the border.

Encouragement With a Touch of Sarcasm

Today’s meditation was another in the series of courses on the Oak app for mantra meditation.  This one was just over eighteen minutes long and incorporated a bit more time in silence than in listening to the guide talk and instruct.  I found it very relaxing, although I have to admit I kind of miss my little water drops music.  I might try to incorporate that music with this type of meditation once I’m done with the course.

Denizens of Earth TarotToday’s draw is the Ace of Pentacles (One of Earth) which is traditionally a representation of the seed of new beginnings and new opportunities in the area of one’s finances, resources, home life, health, manifestations, or the physical world.

Sinapis Alpa (white mustard seeds) is often used in spellcraft for the protection of home and family against danger and the decrease of affection, as well as in healing the effects of discord in the home or between family members.

I really didn’t want to work to day.  Like…. really. Really didn’t feel it at all. But, I had to, because I have to ship out tomorrow and if I have nothing to ship out, then I have slew of unhappy people to answer to, yeah?  So… yeah.   And throughout the entire day my interest in working just got worse and worse.

The answer in these cards today is a little bit honest assessment, a little bit sarcasm, and a little bit sincere encouragement.   First of all, as if not wanting to work today is really any sort of hardship at all.  Right?  It’s just a mood.  There’s the sarcasm.

Second is the encouragement to get it done,  do what needs done because there are others that depend on you.  Without you doing your work? There’s no money.  And no money means no food, no heat, no roof.  So of course, practically thinking, whether you want to work or not, it’s not the end of the world that it has to be done.

The third is the encouragement about my nervousness in crossing the border to see my accountant tomorrow.  There’s a lot of stress and anxiety going on there and I just hope to fuck that I got all my paperwork done right and don’t have to deal with any customs officials having a bad fucking day.

DECK USED:  DENIZENS OF EARTH TAROT AND THERA-PETS EMOTIONAL SUPPORT ANIMAL CARDS

#DiscordTarotolicsMar2021 Challenge Prompt
Question
: Where am I at mentally at this time?

Denizens of Earth TarotSix of Air (Swords)Chamaenerion angustifolium (Fireweed) has significant anti-inflammatory properties that are useful in a variety of field uses from easing gastrointestinal discomforts to first aid treatment on scrapes and bruises and even certain types of arthritis.  Here we see that it is combined with the Six of Swords, indicating that the aspect of my current mental state that this card is referencing has to do with the “inflammation” of stress that has been bothering me the last couple of days as I prepare for this upcoming border crossing.

Guardian of Water (Knight of Cups) atop Four of Water (Cups) – The powerful precision and strong will of the Great White combine with the desire driven direction of the Knight of Cups over shadows the healing and cleansing energy of Salvia officinalis (common sage) shown here with the Four of Water indicating healing comes through meditation and calm rather than excitability.  These cards contrast in their themes and indicate the war within me at this time between my need to meditate, ground, and cleans myself of the anxiety mentioned above… and the determination to move forward in the direction I want to go… feel that I need to go.

Temperance – Although the two energies mentioned above are contrasting to each other, they are also able to work together to my benefit.  Driven energy and healing calm can intertwine like the working of mind and heart as one, and create something even greater than either can on their own.  Take a moment, think and breathe, and allow this intermingling to happen.  In doing so, I will find a far calmer and more beneficial mindset moving forward.

DECK USED:  DENIZENS OF EARTH TAROT

Daily Self Kindness

I took some time at the farm this morning to lie down in the field and just relax after my shift was over.  Of course, I made sure that I was in a field that was not being worked for that day (safety is important).  I made sure I wore extra layers so that I could linger for some time and ended up spending about a half an hour before I was too cold to stay any longer.

Morning Bonus Read – Monthly Key Spread

Monthly Key Spread - Little Lulu's Lucky Lenormand

Key to Your Heart: What will Guide you to make decisions that are aligned with your heart and your truths this month?

Lily – Maturity.  Make sure that you are thinking through your decisions and not just leaving things up to chance or personal whims.  Be especially thoughtful, responsible, and mature in considering what you need to do and how you need to go about doing it this month.

Anchor: What will ground you in the face of anxiety, stress, overwhelm, and existential dread in general?

Clover – Luck and optimism. It’s far too easy to let your worries and fears sneak in and start screwing with you, but keep in mind that just because you worry about something doesn’t make it into reality.  By leaning into a bit of faith concerning luck and encouraging yourself to keep an optimistic mindset, you can circumvent fears and keep them from becoming self fulfilling prophesy.

Star Wand: What accelerates your magic, creativity, and manifestation powers?

Tree – Spiritual connections and longevity of practice.  Lean into the things that work for you spiritually and reconnect with your path and practice.  When you are more deeply connected to your spiritual path and your practice, your  magic, creativity, and manifestation powers flourish.  Throughout this month, as you pull out of the pit of your depression and rediscover your equilibrium, it is important to make sure you connect back into your path and practice instead of setting these things on the back burner.

Blessings from the Stars: The Universe has got your back – how will you be supported this month?

House – You are blessed with the security and stability of a home, and roof, and support of those that live there with you.  In the chaos that the world can sometimes throw your way, this is where you need to return to recover and retreat to find peace. 

One Trick Up Your Sleeve: A life saving idea or inspiration for any unexpected challenge or difficult moments?

Stars – Again we find the advice is to lean into your optimism and allow hope to thrive. Allow moments of inspiration and intuition to help guide you, and keep your perspective uplifted and bright as you work through challenges and difficulties.  Positivity is your friend this month, so lean into it and let it help you get through these moments.

Emergence Pt 1: What is emerging within you / within your reality right now?

Rider – As you climb further up the walls of depression’s pit and find the light, vitality and a renewed energy will continue to grow within you. You will see the light more clearly, feel it more distinctly, and be able to take from it what’s needed to rekindle your passions toward your purpose. 

Emergence Pt 2: What are you expanding towards?

Coffin – There is a warning here that without the armament of positivity and optimism you risk moving in the wrong direction and sliding back toward depression and negativity.  You have a chance to adjust this trajectory, but it will take  connecting to the elements mentioned above that include a conscious effort towards optimism, a reconnection with your spiritual path and practices, and allowing hope to have a place within your life and outlook while grounding yourself in measured and mature decision making practices.

DECK USED:  LITTLE LULU’S LUCKY LENORMAND