nine of Swords

Hope, Comfort, and Growth

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Today’s meditation was just over fifteen minutes long, and was a healing light meditation that I used to focus on my wrist injury.  It was very relaxing, despite the fact that the guide’s voice wasn’t the best.

Halloween Tarot Today’s draw is a double without a jumper, meaning that both cards came out together as one. The cards in today’s draw are The Star card of the Major Arcana and the Nine of Bats (Swords).

This message has to do with vulnerability and inner struggle, and after the evening that I’ve had, I definitely understand where it’s coming from.   The message is that there are going to be times when you’re feeling vulnerable in a very not-pleasant way.  Between the shadow reading I received today and the phone call from my mother, my unpleasant vulnerability is at a high, and as the Nine of Bats indicates, it has definitely caused me some distress.

What I also see in these cards though is the shining sun on the bed and comforting concern of the cat in the Nine of Bats… and the brightly shining star combined with the growth of new green in the Star card.    To me, these factors speak of comfort and hope.

What this means is that yes… it’s been a hard day.  YES, the last few hours have sucked.   But I have right before me the gifts in my life that will help me through it and allow me to grow from the experience rather than letting it drag me down.

Deck Used: Halloween Tarot

Bonus Reading

Another #TarotForGrowthOctober prompt.

Question: What accomplishment of mine should I give myself more recognition for?

Golden Age of Horror Comics TarotReading Summary:   The work that I’ve been doing in an effort to better balance my spirituality (The High Priestess), my newly uncovered level of emotions (Page of Cups), and my responsibilities (King of Pentacles).

Take Away:   This has been a real struggle for me of late and a lot of the time I feel adrift in uncertain waters.  For a while, I was starting to think that I’d dipped my toe in too deep of a pond with the emotion digging, but what I really think is that this new level is just new and makes me feel uncertain.  Balancing that uncertainty with the familiarity of my spirituality and the rigid demand of responsibility has been difficult and… honestly?  I always feel like I’m failing when in truth?  I’m probably not.

Deck Used: The Golden Age of Horror Comics Tarot

What Seeds Take Root

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Today’s meditation was 10 minutes and 10 seconds and focused on transforming negative emotions into positive ones. More specifically, it dealt with irritation, but I really do feel that this could be applied to any negative emotions.

The example used in the meditation explained how you can use your meditation practice, mindfulness, and breathing exercises to transform such emotions as irritation into a more positive light.  This is done by taking a minute and a “step back”, just to take a couple of deep breaths and seek a bit of perspective outside yourself.

The meditation itself included a breathing exercise where you rhythmically count your breaths in, then hold, then breaths out.  I found it so relaxing that I had a hard time getting up after the meditation was done.  I just wanted to lie there and dawdle the day away.   Of course, my stomach and metabolism had other ideas.

Today’s draw is yet another duo, which again had no jumper but came out together. That would be the 14th card of the Major Arcana, the Temperance card, and the Nine of Swords. The keyword on the temperance card is “balance”, and the keyword on the Nine of Swords card is “sorrow”.

To be honest?  I’m not even going to bother defining the traditional meaning for these two cards today, because my intuition is working overtime on this deck, to the point it seems to be almost “mentally blocking” the more analytical, educated side of things.

What I see in these cards is, first and foremost, that Sorrow is at the back.   When I read, the rear card in a double jump is always the subject, and the overlaying card is the commentary.

What the cards are telling me is that, although depression is often a brain chemistry thing for me, in order to assist myself and my meds in keeping myself afloat and out of the mess of a deep pit that my depression is prone to throwing me into… I need to make sure I continue to focus on balance.

I’ve been very tempted lately to up my hours on my part time jobs, because things have been slow with the business.  Not surprising, things are always slow this time of year.  Still, I push myself so hard that the temptation is there even if I don’t really NEED to struggle and strive and push for more.

I need to make sure I remember that this time of year is a time for rest for me.  Next month I have to start gearing up and preparing for the busy holiday season ahead.  June, July, and August are the only months all year that I have to essentially “slack off”.

I need to stop feeling guilt over that “slacking” and see it as what it is.   A time for healing.  A time for restoration.   A time to refill my cup for what’s coming, and repair the damage (emotional, spiritual, physical) that I’ve done to myself over the past year when things were so busy I couldn’t barely breathe.

If I do not give myself that balance?   I will pay for it later in not just my mood, but in my energy levels, creativity, and enthusiasm as well. Which would create a prime set-up for a bit of darkness to creep in and root into the soil.

Deck Used: The Visions of Life Tarot

 

Don’t Get Sucked Into the Whirlpool

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Today’s meditation was ten minutes and fourteen seconds, and focused on the environment, and how we can care for the environment by focusing on the now and what we do in the present in order to foster a better future.

Oh look! It’s me. It’s funny because the original Rider/Waite/Smith artwork for this card has a woman sitting up in bed with the nine swords stacked on the wall, but her face is resting in her hands. The depiction in the deck, on the other hand, is a woman holding her head in her hands like she has a headache. And, that is exactly how I woke up this morning.

The Nine of Swords Is a representation of fruition and consequences In the area of the thoughts, communication, instinct, and logic.

I believe this ties into The Moon card from yesterday, and this cards aspect of consequences, as the Nine of Swords often indicates that you are letting your worries and anxieties get the best of you and cloud your judgment.

Yesterday’s card (The Moon) warned about taking action without seeing the full picture. Here today we have the Nine of Swords indicating that I don’t have the full picture, as well as pointing out to me that I am stressing out and worrying… and that as a result, I am creating a sense within myself of being overwhelmed.

This card message is to remind me that I need to take a breath. I need to sit back and separate my worries from the facts, and move forward only once I have the correct research in place.

Never having had high cholesterol before, this is a dietary issue I’ve never had to deal with. This means that I have quite a bit of research to accomplish in order to get back on the right track. With my surgery coming up tomorrow and my orders due to go out on Friday, this doesn’t leave me a lot of room for other interests and distractions.

The Nine of Swords is telling me that instead of sitting in my mind and stewing about what’s going on with my health, I should just move forward with the best, most healthy decisions I know of at the moment, and then deal with the research once the next couple of stressful days have passed.