Tomorrow is the last full moon of the year, and like all new moons and full moons, I did a spread aligned to the moon’s current themes as a part of my recognition of the moon’s cycle and influences upon us. Today’s spread is brought to you by Ethony‘s Tarot By the Moon series.
1. What spiritual lesson was I learning this year?
Nine of Pentacles – How to be grateful for what I have instead of constantly striving for more. This was actually a side product lesson that came from my efforts to allow my emotional growth room to do its thing throughout the majority of the first part of the year. What I have come to realize is that it actually -is- possible for me to “wallow a bit” in my good fortune and the results of my hard work. That it’s okay to enjoy the now instead of constantly pushing for what’s next. It’s not always easy, but the more that I’ve been able to look at things from this angle, the more I realize that a good portion of that slave driver in my head has nothing to do with a desperate grasping need for security as it has to do with my father’s voice in my head drilling home that nothing will ever be “enough” and thus I must try harder.
2. How can I integrate it into 2021?
Nine of Swords Rx – By focusing on worrying less and stressing out less about the things that “need to be done”. The only deadlines in life are the ones that you are setting for yourself. I used this same line a couple of days ago in a reading and it fits very well here as well. No one else is setting deadlines on me, not for my goals or for the things I want to happen. The only one setting deadlines and demands on myself… is me. I need to take ownership of this and understand that I’m doing this to myself… and that I have all of the control needed to change things to be less stressful.
3. What do I need to let go of now?
Two of Wands Rx – Indirection. You don’t need to control every step, but you don’t need to feel like when you’re not controlling every step that things are going awry either. Last year after the holiday rush, I went through a few months of feeling completely rudderless and adrift. Lost. I need to let go of the idea that this is going to happen again, and instead make moves to make sure that it doesn’t. This isn’t about filling my plate with things to do or about leaving room on my plate either, but rather it’s about dealing with the emotions and decompression that needs to be cared for instead of fighting against it.
4. What spiritual lesson will I be moving into in 2021?
Knight of Chalices – The spiritual lesson in the year ahead will involve learning how to better seek out those things that I really enjoy and make me happy instead of just focusing upon the things that I need to get done. This goes beyond making things more fun or my life happier, but rather by making things more fun and my life happier I will be able to elevate my energy and my spiritual self into a better place.
5. What can I do now to set myself up for success?
Six of Wands Rx – Look inward for encouragement and accolades instead of thinking about what others (namely those voices of your parents in your head) would think or feel. Again we are back at that inner narrative and the negativity of my parental influences on how I treat myself within that narrative. This and other readings I’ve done over the past week or two are making it clear that finding a way to circumvent or “put in its place” that inner narrative is going to be a strong and prevailing theme throughout the next year, and that needs to start now.
Today’s meditation was just under thirteen minutes long and was another of the guided meditations from the Calm app accompanied by an interval timer for my piriformis stretching. 
Today’s meditation was just over fifteen minutes long and focused upon living in the present moment. The past is gone to the unsubstantiality of memory, and the future has yet to become…. so the point of the meditation’s focus was that the present moment is all that we really have that is solid and real and that we can hold onto.
Today’s meditation was was about the temporary nature of unpleasant situations. It talked about an Icelandic concept called “Gluggavedur” or “Window Weather”. That is to say, weather that looks beautiful from within the safe confines of your home, but is just the opposite when you step outside in it.
Twisting the Leaf 