Something Worth Fighting For

Today’s meditation was skipped because I was a lazy fuck and totally overslept today.  In fact when the girls got up I moved from the couch to the bed and went back to sleep.

Forest Creatures Tarot v2 and Flower Fortune CardsToday’s draw is the Five of Cups, which is traditionally a representation of discontent and casting focus upon one’s disappointments and bad experiences instead of upon the good in life and what’s going right.

Like most Five of Cups, the figure in this card looks completely unimpressed with the boon around them.  Even with it right in front of her, the bounty displeases.  She is focused elsewhere and rejects that which is to her good fortune out of displeasure she feels towards something else.

Combined with the Flower Fortune card for today, which says that “If you have something worth fighting for, then fight for it”, the message that I see in today’s cards is about not looking a gift horse in the mouth.  Maybe the grass looks greener elsewhere, but don’t lose your own lawn by being so distracted by the one on the other side of the fence that you don’t tend (and enjoy) what you already have.  It’s okay to work for something more or something better… but don’t forsake what’s good in the now in order to do it.


LionHart’s Reap & Sow Tarot Challenge Prompt
Questions for May 16th through 18th

Darlings TarotAre my current choices in alignment with my inner voice?
Four of Pentacles and Knight of Pentacles

Yes, with a big dose of stability added in due to my need for that, and a big dose of taking it slow added in for self care.  You may be moving at a slower pace than you would like, but the choices you make are aligned with the guidance your inner voice is providing.

Where am I asked to listen {more} to my inner voice?
Eight of Pentacles and King of Wands

When it comes to my business. Not just in the creation and manifestation aspect, but also in the direction that I want to take the business in and how I go about getting there. Keep in mind that it’s not enough to just listen, there must also be action in order for what is said to be applied.

What can listening {more} to my inner voice establish {for me}?
Ace of Cups and King of Swords

It will lead to a more comfortable and stable strategy of introducing my emotions into the process. This is something that I have been trying to do for a while now, as somewhere along the way I feel like all the cycles of burnout and recovery caused me to lose track of my joy in the process.  A strategy that preserves stability and self care while also allowing me to begin finding joy in the process of my work again is what is being offered here… and sounds amazing.


#DiscordTarotolicsMay2021 Challenge Prompt
: Do Spread #2
Question: Why am I so driven to work even when I know that I need to rest?

Forest Creatures Tarot v2Reading Summary: Fear (Nine of Swords) of losing my sense of security and stability (Four of Coins), as well as fear (Nine of Swords) of losing the feelings of success that satiate me on an emotional level (Nine of Cups).

Take Away: Fear.  The answer here is that the reason I work so hard even when I need to rest is fear.  Fear of losing my stability.  Fear of losing my sense of security.  Fear of losing my contentment and the happiness I’ve found in the now.  Fear of losing my sense of “comfortable”.

These fears drive me on even when it’s not healthy for me to push myself so hard.


Daily Self Kindness

I called an end to play with Gideon tonight when I started feeling tender.  I didn’t want to and was really worried about disappointing by doing so but… it got to the point I was struggling to concentrate and stay in character.

Give Yourself Credit

Today’s meditation was just over twelve minutes long, and was a guided meditation from the Calm app with an interval timer added in for my piriformis stretching and forearm flexor stretching.

The focus of today’s meditation was about anxiety and worry, and how sometimes we get so wrapped up in the habit of worrying about things that we forget to look at how unlikely those things we’re worried about are to actually happening.  We lose sight of realism, and lean into projected thoughts which, when we’re worrying about something, can then lead to self fulfilling prophesy.

Better is to have a touch of self awareness so that when you start stewing over something and worrying at it, that you can look at what you’re worried about realistically and give yourself a sort of “reality check” on the likelihood of those worries actually coming to fruition.

The Darlings Tarot and Thera-Pets Emotional Support Animal CardsToday’s draw is the Queen of Pentacles, which is traditionally a representation of a receptive alpha energy, personality, or person in the area of one’s home life, finances, resources, health, manifestations, and the physical world.  This often translates into themes that have to do with nurturing and supportive energies that are strongly grounded and based in strength and purpose.

What stands out to me the strongest in the imagery of this card is the sheer amount of abundance represented here.  The oversized coin.  The plethora of roses and leaves and greenery. The many, many pears piled up around the base of the queen’s throne.   Even the queen with her long hair and long ears, and yards and yards of dress.  She is blessed and willing to share… all you need to do is ask.

Combined with the Thera-Pets card for today is a reminder that you have more to offer than you think you do.  Sometimes we all get down on ourselves. We take for granted what we have to offer to others, or what we give to others.  What seems like a small thing to us, or “nothing” to us, could be huge to someone else.  Even things such as smiles, five minutes of your time, an offered pen when there isn’t one handy… these things can change someone else’s entire day for the better.  So don’t discount what you have to offer the world, and don’t be down on yourself for not offering more.


LionHart’s Reap & Sow Tarot Challenge Prompt
Question: How can I best work with the energies available to me this month?

Reading Summary: You’re going to have to pick and choose (Seven of Cups) what you go after (The Seeker), and set the rest aside (Five of Cups).

The Sacred Grounds Tarot Club Prompt
Tools available to me this month from my “tool box”.

Lua TarotReading Summary: Enthusiasm and alacrity (Eight of Wands) especially when your loved ones and “comfort zone” are involved in the mix (Ten of Cups).  Hope and your spiritual connection to the elements (The Star).

Take Away:  So, I combined two different challenges together for this reading as I felt that they fit really well. 

The message here is that during the month of May, I am being given the opportunity to hone down on my path and the direction I want to take things, but it will require letting go of a few things in order to make room for those things I want to go after to grow and flourish.

In order to do this, it will help to remember to focus on those things that create an element of enthusiasm for me and that I am drawn to due to the emotional comfort and security they bring. My deep connection to my spirituality and the elements, as well as my efforts and commitment to foster hope and positivity in my life will help in making these decisions as well.


#DiscordTarotolicsMay2021 Challenge Prompt
: What in life lights fire to your creative spark?

The Darlings TarotReading Summary: Healthy alone time (The Hermit). Gratitude (Nine of Pentacles). Getting worked up to the point where I say “Fuck it, I’ll do it my own damned way” (Eight of Cups).

Take Away: Alone time that allows me to connect with myself and with nature.  Time spent among the trees on my own, allowing me to really tap into the forest and, while doing so, give myself space and time to tap into myself. Forest bathing allows me this time and connection as nothing else can and I always come back from these times in nature feeling refreshed and ready to create.

Taking time to really tap into what I value in my life and my accomplishments also lights the fire of my creative spark.  It reminds me of what I’m capable of, what I’ve managed to accomplish, and what potential I have to move forward and do more. It reminds me of the opportunities that have been given to me, that I’ve earned along the way, and that are waiting for me in the future.  This view of what I’m grateful for and future potential is inspiring.

Sometimes?  It’s all about opposition.  Not in the way of fighting with others or obstacles in my way, but rather the frustration of seeing things done a different way, a more difficult way, or being told “this is the only way”.  In these moments I can often become oppositional and my creative spark flares as I seek out a better way that will fit me and my methods more comfortably.


Daily Self Kindness

I took a nap!  I didn’t want to take a nap, but I did.  And I feel much better for having done so.