daily tarot

Do The Thing

/ Twist the Leaf / 1 Comment

Today’s meditation was just over ten minutes long and was more of a quiet reflection time with measured breathing and piriformis stretching than the guided meditations that I’m used to.   That’s because I ran across this little graphic (to the right) and it really hit home on me today.

Resonating as it did, I decided to spend my meditation thinking on it, reflecting about what it had to say, and taking the advice given there to heart.  I know this advice is good, as it’s something that the cards have said to me many times.  Especially during recovery from my MDEs when I feel like I should be recovering faster, and yet the lingering traces seem to stretch on and on far longer than I’ve anticipated they might.

Inspiration Tarot and Thera-Pets Emotional Support Animal CardsToday’s draw is is the High Priestess card, which is traditionally about hidden knowledge and secret wisdom. It’s about the subconscious and an understanding of these quiet, secret places that we all have within us, and what lies within those places.  The High Priestess is about finding those places, about rousing one’s intuition, and reading between the lines.

There is an element of self love in the depiction of this particular High Priestess.  It lies within her posture and the tilt of her hand, the position of her hands, the eyes that lie closed instead of open indicating looking inward.

The addition of the Thera-Pets card indicates an experience earlier today when one of my clients reached out for a reading.  I was feeling a little unsure of myself as I’ve been feeling quite tender the last couple of days. That sensation of tender vulnerability can sometimes make reading for others difficult.   I did warn them of this prior to the reading, and they were good with going ahead anyway, though.

The reading went well and it turns out I really had nothing to worry about.  Sometimes?  You just have to do the thing and trust that it’s going to work out.

DECK USED:  INSPIRATION TAROT AND THERA-PETS EMOTIONAL SUPPORT ANIMAL CARDS

The Sacred Grounds Tarot Club Prompt
Question: How can I better ground myself at this time?

Petrak Tarot

Reading Summary: There is a color progression between these three cards that indicates how they should be red.  The depth of red in the Knight of Wands corresponds to the deep red in the lower half of the Six of Discs.  The connection here threads through the center Five of swords, but only barely.  The connection is also present between the center Five of Swords and the end Six of Discs through the depth of blue, also, the connection between the center card and the Knight of Wands is minimal.

What these connections say is that I need to make sure that I’m rooting myself in the Red.  Rooting myself, therefore, in the things that “light my fire” and spark my enthusiasm.  The blue is shared only at the top of all three cards.  The location of the blue hues combined with their depth speaks of the mind.  The Five of Swords touching upon the Six of Discs within the mind’s arena is about pulling back on the battle to reason my way out of doing the stuff that is good for me… avoiding being generous with myself.

Take Away:  The cards here are speaking about my time out in nature either hiking or forest bathing.  I have a great deal of pleasure and enthusiasm for this, and it helps me immensely in staying balanced and grounded.  But I find myself from time to time forcing myself to not do the things that help me feel better.  This is a self destructive urge manifesting into reluctance for self care… and the encouragement  here is to DO THE THING.  Be generous to myself and get my ass out there.

DECK USED:  PETRAK TAROT

#DiscordTarotolicsApr2021 Challenge Prompt
Question: What piece of advice is needed right now to help you achieve your dreams?

Inspiration TarotReading Summary:  When uncertainty clouds your view (The Moon… eyes closed) make sure that you are tapping into your inner generosity (Six of Pentacles) and giving yourself room to ground, stabilize, and provide yourself the nurturing nourishment you need (Queen of Pentacles).  Also, take time to talk to Z (Six of Pentacles beside Queen of Pentacles)

Take Away: The message in these cards is twofold.  Both relate to situations and instances when I’m feeling the need to shirk away from confusion and feeling particularly uncomfortable with “being in the dark”.

During these times, these cards indicate that I need to pause and remember that it’s okay to be afraid and give myself the space, self care, and self kindness needed to get through these situations.

Secondly, this specific combination of cards (the Six of Pentacles combined with the Queen of Pentacles) is Z.  The cards here are reminding me that speaking to Z during these times can be infinitely beneficial.

DECK USED:  INSPIRATION TAROT

Daily Self Kindness

I told Gideon about feeling tender the last couple of days.  I really don’t want him thinking I’m not interested in playing both the sets of chars that we made.  I like them both a lot.  I just have been feeling a bit tender and I guess that’s making me lean more towards the nurturing dynamic right now in play.

Morning Bonus Read – Sacral Connections

/ Twist the Leaf / 1 Comment

Future Ancestor Tarot

My sacral center energy right now.

Two of Needles – A bit conflicted.  This isn’t really surprising considering that it’s now Wednesday and you’re currently creeping towards the time when you’ll need to go back to work. It’s funny in a way, because when you started doing these vacations last year, you couldn’t wait to leap back in to work. This time though? You’re feeling a bit of conflict and resistance.

Tension I’m currently holding in this area.

Five of Cups – Too much time spent focusing on what’s not working, and not enough effort spent focusing on what is. There’s lots of positive things to focus on.  You need to start turning your attention in that direction instead of allowing those things that didn’t work to continue to bug you.

How can I release this tension?

Eight of Cups – Move on.  Focus on what you can do different and where you can go from here. You learn from your mistakes and what doesn’t work.  These moments of failure are guideposts for adapting and moving forward.  Don’t look at them as anything else.

Emotions I repress that I need to allow myself to feel.

Listener of Needles – Emotions related to my mother.  This is not something I’m entirely comfortable with delving into. The whole dealing with my mother or my emotions concerning her is a bit of a sensitive subject. The shift in our relationship that happened when my father passed and I realized just what kind of person she is beneath the facade she prefers to present to both her children and the world… It has become awkward.  And these negative emotions that the shift has inspired don’t have anywhere to really go.

The outcome of allowing myself to feel.

Explorer of Needles – Movement instead of stagnancy. New perspectives, and perhaps a new way to look at my mother and our relationship. Essentially it would allow me to move forward emotionally in this area of things instead of stewing in the discomfort of where we currently stand.

How can I become better connected to my emotions?

The Lovers – Continue focusing on making good decisions that foster that connection.  Over the past year you have been working on connecting more to your emotions and finding a better balance. You need to continue to take each choice and change of direction you come upon, and weigh it carefully against what you want to accomplish with your emotional growth before coming to a decision.

DECK USED:  FUTURE ANCESTOR TAROT

Bending In The Wind

/ Twist the Leaf / 1 Comment

Today’s meditation was skipped again.  This time it wasn’t interruptions, though.  It was sleep.  I got home from the farm and took a shower, then sat my ass down on the bed for a minute to look at the messages on my phone and… fell asleep.  It was a good nap tho!

Botanical Grace Tarot and Thera-Pets Emotional Support Animal CardsToday’s draw is the Ten of Fire (Wands) which is traditionally a representation of allowing your enthusiasm for something to overburden you to the point of overwhelm and potential burnout.

I’m actually a bit confused by this card due to the illustration.  The herb that is (according to the guide) supposed to be represented by this card is Zanthoxylum americanum (Prickly Ash Bark), but the illustration on this card looks like Jasminum flowers.

What I find today is that the today resides not so much in what card popped out (Ten of Fire) but rather the confusion that surrounds the card’s illustration.

Combined with the message on the Thera-pets card for today, what we see here is a message about acceptance and adaptability.   Don’t allow the unexpected to knock you off track or make you doubt yourself.  Stay open to new experiences and new perspectives.  Bend like a tree in the wind and you will weather the changes far easier than if you hold yourself rigid in the storm.

DECK USED:  BOTANICAL GRACE TAROT AND THERA-PETS EMOTIONAL SUPPORT ANIMAL CARDS

The #httSelfImprovementTarotChallenge Prompt
Question: What needs to be released to unburden my soul?

Lunaria Tarot

Reading Summary: Trying to pretend you can ignore (Five of Inkwells) new ideas and inspiration (Ace of Pens) is creating a situation where you end up judging yourself harshly (Judgement) and allowing anxiety to thrive (Nine of Pens).

Take Away:  Essentially?  The cards here are telling me to pull my head out of my ass and start writing down my ideas again as they come up.  Allow them to pour out onto paper and keep a log of them.  As a result I will feel like they have been preserved and not be so down on myself for not pursuing them right away, or forgetting them and then feeling anxious about what I’ve lost with my forgetfulness.

DECK USED:  LUNARIA TAROT

#DiscordTarotolicsApr2021 Challenge Prompt
Trolley Problem: Do you divert the course of nature let one person die to save five strangers, or let nature take its course and let five people die?

Botanical Grace Tarot Reading Summary: Instinctive reaction (in the fire colors within the first two cards).  I would instantly go for (Two of Fire Rx) the thing I feel passion for (Knight of Fire). And then spend the rest of my life judging myself (Judgement) and retreating to beat myself up inside (The Hermit Rx atop Eight of Water).

Take Away: That sounds about right. Honestly?  I’m a selfish fuck and… I would probably kill the five to save the one that matters to me.

In that moment of panic? I can absolutely see myself making that choice, no matter how wrong it might feel later on down the road (or how wrong it might feel if I’d taken time to think). No time to think? I’d just do it… then spent the rest of my life beating myself up about it.

DECK USED:  BOTANICAL GRACE TAROT

Daily Self Kindness

I forced myself not to work today, even though I was very, very tempted to do some work.  I want to try and give myself the most rest and recuperation that I can.   Going back to work will happen soon enough.

Endings Sometimes Hurt

/ Twist the Leaf / 1 Comment

Today’s meditation was skipped because I couldn’t convince anyone (even the cat) to leave me alone.  Every time I tried to get a few minutes of peace, someone was popping in to ask a question, lick my ears, or complain about something. I finally just gave up and said fuck it.

My Garden Deck and Thera-Pets Emotional Support Animal CardsToday’s draw is the Ten of Swords, which is traditionally a representation of painful endings, coming to the end of a painful or uncomfortable journey, and taking a pause to acknowledge that you’ve lost and then pick yourself up and try again.

It’s the latter that I see represented here in this particular imagery, with the person that lies beneath the pinning tips of the sword also represented walking away from that experience.  It is a reminder that bad shit happens, but the strong carry on from it and continue moving forward.

Combined with the Thera-Pets card for today, the message that I see here in today’s cards is that sometimes endings hurt.  Sometimes?  They really hurt.  But there’s a light at the end of the tunnel of all that pain if you just hold on and keep your focus trained ahead.   Take a breath, learn what you can from the experience, and carry the knowledge forward as you keep going and move beyond the ending and the pain.

DECK USED:  MY GARDEN DECK AND THERA-PETS EMOTIONAL SUPPORT ANIMAL CARDS

The #httSelfImprovementTarotChallenge Prompt
Question: What lights my soul on fire?

Future Ancestor Tarot

Reading Summary: Creating opportunities (Two of Seeds) for others to grow and manifest what is right for them in their lives (Eight of Cups). In this endeavor there is an element of nurturing energy that I put towards these things as I give gentle nudges to help people to grow and make the choices that are best for them (Listener of Seeds).

Take Away: I was actually surprised to see this come up as the answer to this question.  There are a few different things I thought might come up, but this wasn’t at the top of the list.  Not that I don’t take a great deal of joy in helping others in this manner, as I absolutely do and it’s a part of the reason that I do tarot readings for others.  It brings me a great deal of joy to help people find the path that’s right for them. 

DECK USED:  FUTURE ANCESTOR TAROT

#DiscordTarotolicsApr2021 Challenge Prompt
Question: Where in your life do you need to direct more gratitude?

My Garden DeckReading Summary: It’s the ones around you that you hold dear (Two of Cups) that help create the security and stability of your home life (Ten of Coins) and encourage you foster connections with not just them but the world around you as well (The Star).

Take Away:  I need to remember and acknowledge more often that I am not an island unto myself.  The people in my life are my support system, my encouragement, my cheerleaders, and often my inspiration. 

I often take these people for granted.  Perhaps we all do from time to time.  Hopefully not so much that they feel neglected, but I’m sure that they could absolutely benefit from me directing a bit more gratitude their way.

DECK USED:  MY GARDEN DECK

Daily Self Kindness

Honestly, after I passed out at the grocery store, I wasn’t feeling completely up to RP.  I’m glad that I did it anyway though, as it helped me find my center again and get comfortable in my own skin after the glucagon shot.

Morning Bonus Read – Monthly Key Spread

/ Twist the Leaf / 1 Comment

Little Soul's Party Lenormand

Key to Your Heart: What will Guide you to make decisions that are aligned with your heart and your truths this month?

The House – When making decisions this week, make sure to keep in mind the safety, security, and above all else, stability, of home and how those decisions you make may affect and influence that stability.

Anchor: What will ground you in the face of anxiety, stress, overwhelm, and existential dread in general?

The Heart – Reach out to those closest to you for support when feelings of anxiety and stress come upon you.  They are there to give you that support, to love you and help you when you need it.  It is something they want to do, so reach out to them and let them.

Star Wand: What accelerates your magic, creativity, and manifestation powers?

The Fox  – A quick and clever mind will help accelerate your inner spark and those things that grow from it.  Your magic, creativity, and skills at manifestation are all a part of that spark, and that spark feeds off of your clever mind full of ideas, strategy, and cunning.

Blessings from the Stars: The Universe has got your back – how will you be supported this month?

The Key – Opportunities abound if you’re paying attention. This month the universe will be throwing opportunities at you that all have the potential to lead to success.  They key is paying attention and grabbing hold when they manifest in front of you. 

One Trick Up Your Sleeve: A life saving idea or inspiration for any unexpected challenge or difficult moments?

The Cavalier – You have the energy and enthusiasm to get things done and when things challenge you or stand in your way you’re more than capable of powering through to get things started.  Don’t allow unexpected challenges or moments of difficulty to stand in your way.

Emergence Pt 1: What is emerging within you / within your reality right now?

The Clouds – Watch out for self doubt encroaching in and confusion.  Sometimes, the ground shifts under your feet unexpectedly and you’re left trying to catch your balance. Keep in mind that if you follow your intuition and inner compass, even those moments in the fog of uncertainty will pass without any real damage done.

Emergence Pt 2: What are you expanding towards?

The Garden – The last factor of life to fall back into balance after the MDE is your social life.  This month you begin to expand in that direction, and in doing so, complete the healing journey out of the dark pit of your depression. 

DECK USED:  LITTLE SOUL’S PARTY LENORMAND

(Wo)Man Behind The Curtain

/ Twist the Leaf / 1 Comment

Today’s meditation was just under ten minutes long and was another of the guided “Daily Calm” meditations on the Calm app, which was combined with an interval timer for my piriformis stretches.

The focus of today’s meditation was about finding peace within the chaos of life through the mindfulness techniques learned during meditation.  I think that this is a valuable lesson, that you can find inner peace in the middle of chaos.  But I also think that there is also a need for actual external peace through quiet and solitude.  Both are important and necessary for inner balance.

Tarot of Baseball and Thera-Pets Emotional Support Animal CardsToday’s draw is the High Priestess card, which is traditionally a representation of secret knowledge and esoteric wisdom.  It’s about intuition and the subconscious, and being aware of the secrets both within oneself and the world at large, and using that knowledge in a way that helps others.

In the theme of baseball (which is the theme of this deck) this role is filled by the girlfriend/wife.  She knows the secrets of her husband or boyfriend. She shares her insights, watches and supports, and that secret self and secret life she shares with him is something only she and he share with each other.

This speaks of those things in life that are not for public consumption, and when combined with the Thera-Pets card for today, the message that I see here is is a reminder that even if you’re not out on the front lines and in front of all the eyes, you’re still important.  Not everyone wants or needs to be in the limelight.  Sometimes?  Being the support in the background is the most important job of all.  So don’t sell yourself short just because you’re not in the spotlight.

DECK USED:  TAROT OF BASEBALL AND THERA-PETS EMOTIONAL SUPPORT ANIMAL CARDS

The Sacred Grounds Tarot Club Prompt
Question: Where does my sense of play need nurturing?

Friends Tarot

Reading Summary:  Make sure that you’re not being too harsh of a taskmaster (King of Swords). Pushing yourself to always strive for more and better (Eight of Pentacles) is not showing yourself kindness or nurturing that inner child (Queen of Pentacles Rx).

Take Away: Fostering my inner child is important, and allowing the harsh slave-driver that is always seeking perfection is –not– nurturing to my inner child or my sense of fun and play.  The message here is that if you don’t give your inner child room to slowly creep its way out of the shadows into the light… if you lean too hard into responsibility and innovation… then that inner child will continue to hide away in the dark.

DECK USED:  FRIENDS TAROT

#DiscordTarotolicsApr2021 Challenge Prompt
Question: What is the most important lesson you need to learn this spring?

Tarot of BaseballReading Summary: Sometimes when you stall too long to find direction (The Hanged Man) in the middle of chaos (The Tower), it leads to uncertainty and indecision (The Moon atop Seven of Caps).

Take Away: There is a difference between stepping back to get some perspective, and stalling your way into indecision. One is a productive way of sussing out the best path forward, and the other is harmful and diversionary.

The cards here indicate that the most important lesson I will need to learn this month is about how to tell the difference, and make sure that my searching for perspectives doesn’t end up going on so long that I end up worse off than if I’d acted without pausing at all.

DECK USED:  TAROT OF BASEBALL

Daily Self Kindness

I’ve struggled a bit today with being kind to myself about taking time off.  I ended up spending most of the day playing with Gideon again, which was wonderful.  I also put off working on blog posts and catching up because it felt a bit overwhelming.