It’s Okay To Be Vulnerable… With You

Today’s meditation was ten minutes and six seconds, and focused on saying “yes”… and our motivations behind why we say “no”.

“No” can be a good word.  It sets boundaries and keeps us safe.  But, there are times when it is also used in a way that limits our potential.   In these moments, “no” comes not from a place of self empowerment, but rather from a place of anger or fear.

This guided meditation encouraged taking a moment when we’re about to say “no” to really consider why we are saying “no”, and where that response is coming from, examining if we are practicing good judgement… or if we are practicing limiting behaviors.  Then, when we catch ourselves doing the latter, changing that “no” to a “yes”, in order to foster new experiences and personal growth.

I think everyone has these moments where they use “no” as a limiting behavior, and I really liked this meditation and it’s reminder to essentially “grab life by the balls” and be open to new experiences.

Today’s draw is the 6th card of the Major Arcana, the Lovers card, and like all cards in the Major Arcana it relates to not one aspect of the human experience, but the larger picture.  The Lovers card has a vast array of symbolism and meanings which include themes such as duality, harmony, the alignment of one’s values with another’s, meaningful relationships (not just romantic in nature), and love.

Today this card represents being open and vulnerable with the one you love, and the trust and faith that it takes to do so.  It is a card that speaks of my submission, and of your dominance, of the balance we have, of our give and take, and of the depth of trust that has been built around us like an insulating wall.

The longer that we are together, the more depth develops into our relationship.  You find ways to accommodate my more dominant tendencies, and I find ways to accept and incorporate the submissive ones I discovered when we first met.  In the first few years, it was much a “on/off” type of switch.  We switched places, and it was either one or the other.   But, as time has gone on, this has turned into a flow of give and take that is always changing, and yet always stable.

The Lover’s card today is a reminder of this balance, of the trust we share, and the comfort we take in each other.   It is a reminder that it’s okay to be vulnerable, as well as a reminder to be conscious of, mindful of, and grateful for what we have.

I am.

I love you.

Deck Used: Student Tarot v5

 

Old Habits Die Hard

Today’s meditation was ten minutes and fifty six seconds, and focused on dealing with failure.  Everyone deals with failure from time to time, and the key to moving past it is to look at failures as a lesson to be learned, rather than internalizing failure into a reflection of you and your worth.

My mindset on doing something… anything, really, is that I will push myself as hard as I can.  Try my best to do the very best that I can.   That way, IF I end up failing, I can’t look back and say “Well, that was a waste of time.  I could have done better.”     Instead, when I fail, I can look back and see where I can improve and either make changes to my approach the next time or accept that perhaps what I was striving for just wasn’t meant for me.    Because I gave it my all, there is no doubt that I “could have done better” somehow.  I know that I did my best.

I think if more people looked at things in this way, there would be far less people out there “half assing” shit.  And far less people putting themselves down when they eventually fail at something.

This isn’t to say that I don’t get bummed sometimes when I stumble across failure.  I do.  But it’s extremely rare that I internalize it as a reflection on me on a personal level.

In the guided meditation, failure was presented as an opportunity for growth, but also as something you separate yourself from (much like rejection was approached in a recent Supportive Tarot topic).   In this approach, you work to view failure not as a reflection on YOU personally (ie: your personality or worth), but rather a failure of the method.

Today’s draw is the Knight of Cups, which is a representation of a projective beta energy, personality, or person in the area of emotions, relationships, intuition, and creativity.

A lot of times in readings I see this card as the charmer in the bar, full of flattery and lacking substance.  Or rather, his aim in the moment lacks substance, right?  He’s not after the long term, he just wants to feel good and in the process, his emotional manipulations and machinations will make -you- feel good too… for the time being, anyway.

This card, of course, represents far more than that, and I don’t think that is the message in the card today.

Today, the Knight of Cups is telling me to get in touch with my emotions.  Emerging from the subdrop, sometimes I find myself backsliding into  my old stand-by habits of closing myself off emotionally.    Today’s card is a reminder to actively keep an eye on this and stay open… to you, to others, and to the world at large.

 

 

An Appreciative Mindset

Today’s meditation was ten minutes and thirty eight seconds long, and focused on getting the most out of your meditation practice by carrying it beyond just those few minutes in which you are with in meditation.

This involves the practice of taking a moment just to stop and “smell the roses” and be mindful of where you’re at during the day, or perhaps using breathing techniques during times of stress in order to retain some semblance of calm.

The fact is, if you are meditating on a regular basis and not feeling as if you are making any progress… chances are you have not carried your practice beyond just that time spent meditating. In order to get the most out of one’s meditation practice, it is necessary to take what is learned within your daily practice out into the world with you on the day to day.

Today’s draw is the Three of Cups, which is a representation of harmony, collaboration, communication, cooperation, and “good times” in the area of emotions, intuition, creativity, imagination, and relationships.

The Three of Cups is a”live in the moment” card. It is all about finding that “groove” with others and reveling in it.  In fact, it has a bit of a hint of revelry to it all on its own.

The appearance of the Three of Cups in today’s draw is a reminder to be grateful for what I have and relish the present.   It speaks of appreciating not just the situation of the now, but also the people I am surrounded with and share my life with, collaborate with, and spend time with.

 

The ‘Us’ Card

Today’s meditation was 10 minutes long, and focused on making a choice to reside in the present and mindful in the moment, rather than allowing future worries and concerns or past traumas to pollute your mind and emotions with stress and anxiety.

Sometimes, in the face of stress over the future, we forget just how sweet the current moment is.   Today’s meditation was a reminder to stay mindful of the present and don’t get carried away with things that are either already over, or have not even come yet into existence.

Today’s draw is the Three of Pentacles, which is a representation of collaboration, cooperation, and the small gains and growth in the area of the physical world, finances, manifestation, and resources.

The Three of Pentacles reminds me of our relationship.  Not that there are three people in our relationship, but rather that there are three entities… the you, the me, and the us.

This is not the suit of emotions and relationships, mind you.   That would be the suit of Cups.  But, I feel that this suit fits our relationship better.  For me, our relationship isn’t based on emotions.   I’m not saying that love and emotions are not there, as they absolutely are.  I’m saying that our relationship feels like home.  Solid.  Substantial. Supportive. Stable.  All of these are a reflection of the suit of Pentacles, and that, to me, is where our relationship resides.

The Three of Pentacles speaks of how differences come together to create something better, collaborating in a way that each side contributes its own particular brand of expertise to the whole.   The you, the me, and the us.

Each on our own are forces to be reckoned with, and we are both very, very different.  But, what we have built together is also its own thing.  It is “US” and that, too, is powerful and strong in its own right.  It is the blend of two that creates something with a life of its own.  Our life.

Today’s appearance of the Three of Pentacles isn’t a lesson, but simply a reminder to appreciate the us… and the you… and the me.   All three distinctive factors, unique and essential in their own right, that when combined together create something bigger and more beautiful than any one could have done on its own.

I love you.

 

Be a Nice Boy

Today’s meditation was ten minutes long, and focused on clarity of the senses.

This is the conscious act of taking time to pay attention to both the world around you and your own body, rather than allowing disinterest to muffle the things that you are experiencing.

This is especially important when feeling like the world is a drab and boring, and there is nothing new of interest to capture and hold one’s attention. At these times a lot of people take trips or go on vacations, but that really isn’t necessary in order to refresh one’s view of the world. What is needed is to focus on and appreciate the little things. That is what clarity of the senses is all about.

Bearing down on the little details, sort of like putting on a new pair of glasses after getting a new prescription, allows you to see things from a new perspective and appreciate the complexity and beauty of even something so small as a crack in the pavement.

This is along the same theme as yesterday’s forest bathing, although you are taking this awareness with you back into your regular life rather than leaving it behind in the forest.

Today’s draw is the Five of Wands and the 15th card in the Major Arcana, the Devil card. No the card is a jumper, as they both came out together.

The Five of Wands is a representation of struggle and strife, tests and trials, harshness, discord, and conflict in the area of one’s ambitions, drive, willpower, and passion.

The Devil card is a representation of temptation and the shadow self. This card, like all major arcana cards, does not represent a certain aspect of life but rather the larger picture as a whole.

As part of the subdrop, I found myself with a tendency to feel a bit snippy this morning when interacting with other people. Today’s draw is a reminder that this temptation will only lead to conflict, and seeking out conflict… or inspiring conflict, will only lead to a crappier day and the emergence of more of my shadow self self.

This is a cycle that will continuously feed upon itself. It is a cycle that I need to be aware of today, so that I can avoid it and have a more pleasurable day, as well as to avoid affect other’s days in a negative way.

Coping With Subdrop

Today’s meditation was ten minutes and thirty six seconds, and focused on shinrin-yoku, or what is known as “forest bathing”.

This is a type of eco-therapy where one takes a walk in the woods and, instead of spending the time distracted by one’s phone, thoughts, or the drive for getting exercise, you focus on your senses and what you are experiencing there within the forest.

This includes everything from listening to the sounds of the forest such as the rustle of leaves and sound of insects, to the scents of the forest such as the smell of the earth and the trees, the experience of touch through feeling the sun and air on the skin or the feeling of dappled shade through leaves, taking in the colors and shapes and beauty around you, and even taste through how the air tastes as you breathe it in.

When I hike, this is my practice. I am not hiking in order to get exercise or see how far I can go. I am there to enjoy nature in all of its subtle (and not-so-subtle) ways. Sometimes, I might bring my camera… but I always turn my phone off and leave my earbuds at home.

To me, hiking has always been a time to commune with nature. Like some people use a maze or labyrinth to foster mindfulness, I have always used the hiking trails in the forests here where I live in this way.

Today’s draw is the 14th card in the Major Arcana, the Temperance card. Like all cards in the Major Arcana, this card deals with not just one single aspect of the human experience, but instead a broader picture as a whole.

The Temperance card is a representation of moderation, balance, and patience. It speaks of the need for a pause before reacting, thought before action, and reflection before absorption. This is an extremely good card for me today, because the subdrop has definitely arrived! Holy crap, has it ever.

One of the qualities of the Temperance card is to remind you to remain calm during times of stress and chaos. The subdrop is absolutely a time of stress and chaos for me, as I feel extremely vulnerable emotionally during this time.

As a result, the message of the card for today is just to take my time. Remember that I need to consciously seek out balance and stability, rather than just flying off the handle over every little thing. No matter whether that be mentally, emotionally, or even physically.

Side Note: Whenever I am in subdrop, it always reminds me of those movies where a woman is in labor and she looks over at her significant other and screams at him, “This is all your f’king fault, you son of a bitch!”.

Like pregnancy and labor, the sub drop is a joint endeavor… but in the moment, I just feel like blaming it all on you. Just sayin’.