Tarot Mucha

Lean In… I Have Two Shoulders

/ Twist the Leaf / 1 Comment

Today’s meditation was just under eleven minutes long and was attached to the end of my yoga / physio practice.   I had a good deal to do today and didn’t want to risk falling asleep, so I did a steady breathing exercise combined with a full body scan while on my yoga mat rather than doing the meditation on the bed while in a piriformis stretch.  It’s just too easy to get comfortable and doze off on the bed sometimes.

Forager's Daughter Tarot - Ten of PentaclesToday’s draw is is the Ten of Pentacles, which is traditionally a representation of attainment, completion, and fulfilled contentment in the area of one’s finances, resources, health, and the physical world.

What stands out to me the strongest today in this card’s imagery is the mama bear.  This speaks to me of a sense of security and stability when combined with the presence of the little cub that she stands besides. The protective aggression that a mother bear has for her cubs is legendary and well known around the world, and in this imagery, I see the security and stability she offers to the cub just by her presence.

The message in today’s card is a reminder of the security and stability that I provide those that depend upon me, just by being there.  Just by them knowing that I have their backs and am there for them when they have need. As well as a reminder of the fulfillment that I gain from being that security and stability for those I love.

DECK USED:  FORAGER’S DAUGHTER TAROT

#TarotForGrowthMay Challenge Prompt
Question: How can I honor or uphold my inner child’s message?

Mermaid Tarot

Reading Summary: Allow others in (Two of Cups) to help keep me on track (The Fool Rx) and in control (The Emperor).

Take Away:  My inner child’s message was about making sure as things settle back into a “new normal” post-pandemic lockdown, that I don’t forget about my self care.  The cards here in this reading indicate that in order to uphold that advice, I need to reach out to others to help keep me from falling back into old habits.  Even kings have advisors.

DECK USED:  MERMAID TAROT

#DiscordTarotholicsMay2020 Challenge Prompt
Question: How can I better utilize my free time?

Tarot MuchaReading Summary: The Ace of Wands and Ace of Cups are conjoined in this reading and represent those things that both inspire my inner spark as well as create a sense of joy and pleasure.   The message here, when combined with the Fool, is that I need to bound after these things with enthusiastic joy.

Take Away:  The cards here speak about the need to balance my work time with more of what makes me feel enthusiastic and inspired.  I currently fill my free time with yet more work, and sleep.  I work while I eat… I work while I spend time with you.  I work all the time.  The cards don’t just tell me what to do with my free time, but indicate the attitude that I need to approach free time with…. not seeing it as an opportunity to “get more done”, but instead as an opportunity to have some fun.

DECK USED:  TAROT MUCHA

#MysticStarChallenge
Question: How can I embrace the new ‘normal’ and re-balance it into my life?

Light Visions Tarot

Reading Summary: This reading carries over from the reading I did today for Tarotholics Challenge.  It speaks of embracing those things that “light my fire” (Knight of Wands) and allowing them to be at the foundation of my restructuring process (Queen of Wands).   The Seven of Swords here is a reminder that taking time to enjoy the things that make you happy is not something to feel guilty about.  You are not “stealing” that time away from other responsibilities and obligations… especially not if you specifically make room in the new life balance to fit these things in.

Take Away:  This again falls into the same message that I have been getting a lot lately.  That is, that I need to make sure I am leaving room on my plate to allow for time to breathe and have a little fun.  A flame cannot spark or dance if it has no oxygen… and my creative spark is the same.  It needs room to stretch and breathe, it needs a sense of openness and fun and a lack of guilt over taking time to enjoy.  It’s important that I create that room as things begin returning to the “new norm” so that I don’t lose the progress and growth that I’ve been experiencing over this time.

DECK USED:  LIGHT VISIONS TAROT

#ConnectWithYourDeckChallenge by E Roebuck-Jones
Question: When do I feel responsible for another person’s feelings?

Fairy Tarot by Doreen Virtue

Reading Summary: When I’m blindly going about my business without paying attention to my surroundings or affect on others (Eight of Winter) and end up hurting other’s feelings (Queen of Winter Rx) as a result either through intention (Princess of Autumn) or inexperience (Princess of Summer).

Take Away:  The truth is? Everyone does this sometimes, including myself.  You get so wrapped up in your own little world and your own personal perspectives, or distracted by a situation, that you forget about everyone and everything else…. and end up hurting someone’s feelings as a result.   This type of situation is when I feel responsible for other’s feelings… because it seems like it is a direct result of my own carelessness (which can also sometimes appear like callousness).  

The advice provided is that when I’m in this type of situation, it’s time to bring in outside eyes to look at what happened and give their perspective and advice.

DECK USED:  FAIRY TAROT BY D VIRTUE

 

Finding Joy

/ Twist the Leaf / 1 Comment

IMG_4372Today’s meditation was fifteen minutes long and was not a guided meditation.  Instead, I did a few minutes of deep breathing pranayama followed by a quiet, centered meditative state where I considered the question in this graphic that I came across in my feed on Instagram.

The question really struck a cord with me when I saw it, it really resonated and I feel like it needs more attention than just a passing thought.

There are a couple things that really came to mind for me when I thought over this question.   The first is… the sleep. Pre-pandemic, I was averaging about 3 hours of sleep at night, and then another 2-3 hours in the afternoon.   I have been sustaining this schedule (not without a bit of struggle) for…. ten… maybe fifteen years now.   The pandemic and loss of employment it caused opened up a number of hours to me that I would normally be working.  Hours that I filled (predominantly) with sleep.

It has been fucking glorious.  And, although I know when things get back to normal I will need to take those hours of sleep away and put them back to working?  I wish I could keep them. Just sayin’.

Second is the time I have been able to commit to my emotional growth and development.  This isn’t so much about extra time as it is about the ability to remain open for an extended periods without the need to protect myself or guard myself.   Because I am sensitive to energy, I (apparently, although I didn’t realize this until recently) usually run around in the world with a certain amount of energetic/mental/spiritual shielding in place.

During this time when I have been forced to let go of so much and remain away from most people more than usual, I’ve found that I’ve been able to ease those shields down a bit and this has had an interesting side effect of giving my emotions and inner self some “breathing room” much like someone taking off a body suit to run around nekkid instead gives the body/skin breathing room.

Maruco Animal Tarot - The ChariotToday’s draw is the Chariot card, which is traditionally interpreted as… well essentially it is the epitome of the Wands suit of the tarot, all rolled up into one and then spread out like peanut butter on toast throughout all of the different aspects of life.  This theme is one of control, willpower, and drive.  It’s about taking those horses by the reigns and pointing them toward the triumph you desire, and plowing forward with determination.

What stands out to me in the imagery of this card today is the expression of pure joy on the squirrel’s face as he drives the chariot forward.

The message here in today’s card is about enjoying what you do and not allowing yourself to fall into a mindset of seeing those things you do as a chore and an obligation rather than as a joy.

I struggle with this sometimes, especially when I am feeling overwhelmed.  I start to see the things that I usually take such pleasure and passion in as pain in the ass chores.  I have the blessing of being able to do something I truly love with my life, and being able to express the massive does of creativity I’ve been blessed with in a myriad of ways.  Today’s card is a reminder to take that creativity and enjoy it as I go about the day to day activities of my life.

DECK USED:  MARUCO ANIMAL TAROT

#TarotForGrowthMay Challenge Prompt
Question: What aspect of myself am I keeping hidden that needs attention?

Mucha Tarot

Reading Summary: This spread is referring to my COTD message above. It has to do with limiting my  perspective (Hanged Man Rx) concerning my work (Eight of Pentacles) and ending up disappointed with the process as a result (Three of Swords).

Take Away:  The aspect of myself that is being kept hidden is the fact that I’m not allowing myself enough joy in my creative process to keep that spark of joy and interest alive in my work.   I need to work on focusing on the enjoyment of the process of creation and how good I feel in sending out my creations into the world to bring pleasure to others.   I’ve lost track of that a bit lately.

DECK USED:  TAROT MUCHA

#DiscordTarotholicsMay2020 Challenge Prompt
Question: What secret do I need to let go of and set free?

The Fountain TarotReading Summary: This reading is also about that hidden discontent (Ten of Pentacles Rx) I’ve been feeling lately (mentioned in today’s COTD) concerning the menial and repetitive tasks of my work (Eight of Coins Rx).  The Empress speaks of a need to allow her kindness and nurturing to flow out from her (the green behind her and at her feet) and into these aspects where discontent has flourished (the green in the other two cards).

Take Away:  Instead of hiding how I’ve been feeling about my work concerning my home business, I need to let it out and treat it with kindness and understanding.  Consider how the items I create and send out into the world influences the lives of others, and allow that pleasure I give them to re-kindle my own joy in the process.

DECK USED:  THE FOUNTAIN TAROT

#MysticStarChallenge
Question: What can I do to better cope with this time away from my ‘normal life’?

The Muse Tarot

Reading Summary:  It is a good time to work at bridging the gap (Muse of Materials) between the spark of ideas (Ace of Voices) and my intuition (The Priestess).

Take Away:  So often, the mind and intuition are at odds with each other.  Intuition whispers quietly, just barely able to be heard most of the time… while the mind shouts loudly and tries to run over everything with its voice.  

Spending time focusing on bridging that gap and allowing intuition to have its way (tip of the moon piercing the priestess’ palm… which bleeds light) will allow me to find a better balance and allow me to use my intuition and depths of inner knowledge to calm my brain down and keep it from overwhelming everything.

DECK USED:  THE MUSE TAROT

#ConnectWithYourDeckChallenge by E Roebuck-Jones
Question: When I remain silent, what is blocking me from asking my partner for what I need?

Mythical Creatures Tarot by BabaStudios

Reading Summary:  The idea that if I let my freak flag fly (Hierophant Rx) that he will turn and walk away (Eight of Cups) and my bleeding heart will be my own doing (Justice).

Take Away:  This reading is referring to having hidden from you for so long just how much tarot and my spirituality was a part of my life.   It is about the fear I felt about losing you due to a lack of conventionality.   When I am silent, this is often the fear that holds me back.  That fear of you walking away and it being all my fault that it happened…. all my fault that my heart is bloody pulp on the floor.   Somehow, the fact that I am the one that destroys everything… just makes it all that much worse. 

DECK USED:  MYSTICAL CREATURE TAROT BY BABASTUDIOS

 

Sink or Swim

/ Twist the Leaf / 1 Comment

Today’s meditation was skipped in favor of getting my ass going on orders.  Yes, I know that is a horrible excuse and yet… I’m not going to cover it up.  I made the decision to skip today in order to dive into work and get things done.

Maruco Animal Tarot - The TowerToday’s draw is The Tower card of the Major Arcana (again), which is a representation of sudden and chaotic change.

What really stands out to me in the imagery of this card today is the two bunnies.  Unlike in most Tower cards where the figures look like they are being thrown from the tower by the force of the blast, these bunnies look to me like they are fleeing.   This speaks to me of the reality that sometimes?  When your boat is sinking it’s time to jump in the water and pray for the best.

It’s not really in my nature to bail on a struggle, but I do understand that sometimes?  Just have to do so.   Especially when you don’t like what’s happening and have no control over the chaos or the outcome.

I feel like this has to do with my expectations. Specifically those to do with humanity’s intelligence as a whole.  Not that I can bail on humanity, but it might be time to bail on the expectation that intelligence is an inherent part of humanity.  At least… that’s what it feels like lately whenever I watch the news.

Or maybe the real message here is to bail on paying so much attention to the news, because every damn time I do?  I become more disappointed in the intelligence level of society and humanity as a whole.   I understand there are small pockets of real thinkers… but jesus… it just seems like there are so many more idiots out there than people using their brains.

DECK USED:  MARUCO ANIMAL TAROT

#TarotForGrowthMay Challenge Prompt
Question: What makes me feel more connected or aligned with Self?

Sun and Moon Tarot

Reading Summary: When my plate is full (Ten of Wands) and I am feeling clear headed and in charge (King of Swords) with a sense of inspiration and adventure blowing wind into my sails (Princess of Swords).

Take Away:  It’s only when I am feeling the fog of confusion, fear, or struggling with emotions that carrying a full plate of responsibilities becomes a struggle for me.   When I feel most “myself”, it is when my mind is clear and I’m invigorated with lots to do and a sense of productivity at  play.

DECK USED:  SUN AND MOON TAROT

#DiscordTarotholicsMay2020 Challenge Prompt
Question: How can I improve upon my self-care at this time?

The Muse TarotReading Summary: Lean your expertise (Eight of Materials) into ideas that inspire you (Ace of Inspiration). Your progress and stability (Imagery in the Muse of Materials) will continue for a while without you in the saddle (Knight of Materials).

Take Away:  The cards here are encouraging me to delve into my new ideas and inspiration instead of focusing so tightly on my financial stability and progress.  It’s okay to take some time away from these stresses that I spend so much of my time and energy focusing on.  It’s okay to delve into other passions and ideas for a bit.  Nothing is going to topple off kilter if you do this for a short time (and perhaps begin to incorporate it into my life in some way to carry it forward in the future as well).

DECK USED:  THE MUSE TAROT

#MysticStarChallenge
Question: How can I overcome my fear of change?

Mystic Faerie Tarot

Reading Summary: Hope for something better to come (The Star) while taking action to defend (Eight of Wands) what I hold most dear (Three of Pentacles) with all the tools in my arsenal (The Magician).

Take Away:  When change comes around, whether it’s gradual and builds up over time or comes out of the blue with chaos and a cacophony of stress, I have a habit of going immediately to a pessimistic view and start catastrophizing.  I think this is pretty normal for a lot of people, but it isn’t productive and only indulges my fears.

The cards here indicate that if I want to overcome these fears, a better option is to consciously reach for a more optimistic view of what the changes might result in while making sure those things that are important to me stay whole and cared for along the way.

DECK USED:  MYSTIC FAERIE TAROT

#ConnectWithYourDeckChallenge by E Roebuck-Jones
Question: How am I different in my romantic relationship than I am with others?

Tarot Mucha

Reading Summary: Vulnerable (Five of Pentacles) and uncertain (Nine of Cups Rx) and more open to allowing my emotions to overflow (Ace of Cups).

Take Away:  In my romantic relationship, I allow far more vulnerability to rise to the surface and be shared with you than I would ever allow others outside of that intimate relationship to see.  I share with you my uncertainties and fears, my worries and self doubts.   I share with you all of these things, and I share with you my emotions, which is something I very rarely share with others in any true depth.  With you, though, I allow those emotions to spill over within the safety and security of the knowledge that you want them… need them… and will love me no matter how intense or disorganized or messy that emotional part of me may be.

DECK USED:  TAROT MUCHA

Reassessment of The Familiar

/ Twist the Leaf / 1 Comment

Today’s meditation was once again interrupted.  This time by my mother in need of technical support for both her computer, printer, and her iPad.  I managed to help her with two out of the three, so she was able to use the iPad to print what she needed.   But, I was unable to help her with the computer and she’s going to need someone to take it in for repair.  I think she needs a boot disk, and I am absolutely certain she doesn’t have one.

So… I will be including a meditation into my bedtime routine again tonight.

Maruco Animal Tarot - Page of WandsToday’s draw is the Page of Wands, which traditionally is a representation of a receptive omega energy, personality, or person in the areas of one’s drive, ambitions, passions, and innovations.  This often displays itself in themes involving inspiration, renewed enthusiasm, and an exponential potential for growth.

What stands out to me today in this card is the “posture of discovery” that the rabbit is portraying in relation to the wand in his hands… and the little rabbit head at the top of the staff that, to me, indicates a sense of familiarity and communion.  It also feels significant that the bunny is barefoot, as it conveys a certain amount of vulnerability.

The message in today’s card is that it would be a good idea to take a look at the every day and the familiar in my life.  These things can be taken for granted, but can in truth also be great motivators and refresh the spark of inspiration when given a chance.  The vulnerability aspect has to do with being open to that inspiration, instead of “keeping your head down” and trudging onward because that is often what feels safest.

I relate really strongly to this message today, as I spent a great deal of my day on the farm helping them restructure their planting and harvest plans for this year to adjust to the diminished demand for perishables due to the extremely diminished demand from the restaurant industry combined with  people’s reaction to the pandemic spurring their desire to stock up on non-perishables rather than purchasing fresh produce at the same rate as in previous years.

DECK USED:  MARUCO ANIMAL TAROT

#TarotForGrowthMay Challenge Prompt
Question: What fulfills me?

Tarot Mucha

Reading Summary: Whether my intuition is full on (High Priestess) or is being blocked by emotions or other issues (Page of Cups Rx), I am fulfilled by my efforts to help others (The Hierophant) to be proactive in moving forward upon their own path (Temperance Rx).

Take Away:  One of the things that greatly fulfills me is helping others find their path and move forward upon it.   Their paths are very rarely the same as my path, but that really doesn’t matter.  It’s about helping them find what works for them, which is something that I feel capable of doing even when my intuition is blocked… but most especially when it’s not.

DECK USED:  TAROT MUCHA

#DiscordTarotholicsMay2020 Challenge Prompt
Question: How can I improve upon the person I am now?

TaRat Rat TarotReading Summary:  Don’t allow the lack of alone time (The Hermit) to steal away (Seven of Swords) my commitment (Page of Cups) and enthusiasm for leaning into (Queen of Wands) the emotional growth I’m currently experiencing (Previous Reading).

The Queen of Wands and the Page of Cups hearkens back to a reading I did for myself with this same deck on May 5th, where jumpers gave me the exact same cards which landed in the exact same positions on the board when first pulled as they did today.  That reading was about allowing my emotional exploration and growth to have some free reign, and the repeat of these cards in today’s draw holds a message to remind me of that reading and build upon it with this one.

Take Away:  Yesterday I had a good deal of business themed readings.  This reading is a reminder not to allow what needs to be done for the business to distract me from the emotional growth and exploration I’ve made the decision to embracing.

DECK USED:  TARAT RAT TAROT

What’s Been Missed?

/ Twist the Leaf / 2 Comments

IMG_4089Today’s meditation was ten minutes long and focused on holding space for others.   That is, spending time with others when they are struggling or in need, and just… being there.  Not trying to fix anything or even really trying to uplifting them, but sharing space with them so that they do not feel alone.

I admit, this is not one of my strong suits.  This isn’t to say I can’t do it, only that… I feel the need to fix things.  Deep inside, I feel the need to help by fixing or making better.  And this makes just sitting there and not actively trying to help extremely difficult for me, no matter how much I understand that that time and company, in and of itself, really is helping.

Maruco Animal Tarot - Ten of PentaclesToday’s draw is the Ten of Pentacles, which is traditionally a representation of completion and abundance as well as the “sharing of the wealth”of that abundance.

What really stands out to me in this card today is the puppy, which in the imagery here speaks to me about not forgetting the usually forgotten.   The invisible and the lost, yes?

Sometimes when we find ourselves in abundant circumstances and we begin “spreading the wealth” we forget those that might need it most but have a habit of slipping between the tracks.

Today’s card is a reminder to examine how my “wealth” is being dispersed and make sure I’m not allowing anything to “slip between the cracks”.

DECK USED:  MARUCO ANIMAL TAROT

#TarotForGrowthMay Challenge Prompt
Question: What recent accomplishment do I need to take pride in?

Stella's Tarot

Reading Summary: My ability to better control the more dangerous aspects of my passions and drive  (the leopard jumping through the ring controlled by the queen of wands), and allowing a willingness to delve into (Eight of Wands) my emotions,  contentment, and balance (Ten of Cups) with helping others as my motivation (Six of Disks).

Take Away:  There are aspects of my passionate drive and entrepreneurial spark that are a danger to me. If left with free reign, they eat away at my self-care until I am so focused and obsessed on that driving passion that it becomes a detriment to my health and well being.  The accomplishment mentioned here in the cards that I need to take pride in is the fact that I have reigned in that drive to a level that allows me time for self care and the exploration of my emotions and other “good for me” areas of my life.  The last card is a mention of how I find the motivation for this.  I am no good to others, unless I’m taking care of myself.

DECK USED:  STELLA’S TAROT

#DiscordTarotholicsMay2020 Challenge Prompt
Question: What quality do I possess that others value most about me?

I Tarocchi Visconti Sforza PiccoloReading Summary:  I give the impression of being a mature, reasonable, and dependable person (King of Cups) with an optimistic and hopeful outlook towards the future (Temperance atop Ace of Discs) that’s a bit of a workaholic… or a lot of a workaholic (Ten of Wands).

Take Away:  Okay so yes, I caught my little slip there.  That whole “I give the impression of being” is not from the cards but from my own self doubt.

I am mature, reasonable, and dependable… I do try and be optimistic and hopeful about the future… and I am absolutely a workaholic.   The cards indicate that these qualities are some of the things that others value most about me. 

DECK USED:  I TAROCCHI VISCONTI SFORZA PICCOLO

#MysticStarChallenge
Question: What knowledge should I learn from this Global situation?

Tarot Mucha

Reading Summary: Sometimes you have to stick (Six of Swords Rx) around and do the best with what you have (Five of Cups). Practice gratitude and keep hope alive (The Star).

Take Away:  Sometimes when the shit hits the fan?  There’s no bailing out for greener pastures or a new start.   Sometimes there is no escape.   The “Global situation” (aka the Pandemic) has taught me that there are times when you just have to hunker down and wait it out, doing the best you can with what you have, and keeping hope alive for a brighter future while staying focused on counting your blessings.

DECK USED:  TAROT MUCHA

#ConnectWithYourDeckChallenge by E Roebuck-Jones
Question: What are my best qualities that I bring to a relationship?

Embroidered Forest Tarot

Genuineness (King of Swords) – I am… me.  I have no need to be anyone else, no desire to be anything else.  When I hide pieces of me from my partner, this feels wrong and uncomfortable. I am always honest and forthright in my communication as well, which keeps misunderstandings to a minimum even if it means I’m sometimes a bit too blunt. It’s better and easier to just be open and allow them to see the real me.  This way they know who I am and what’s coming where I am concerned and where they stand with me and I with them.

Nudges Towards Progress and Betterment (The Chariot) – This is not something I became aware of until Gideon, but I feel it is important to encourage the one I am with to be a better person.  This isn’t about controlling them, but about providing perspectives and opening up their view to different ideas and other, better paths that might improve their situation, outlook, or trajectory.

Emotional Support (Queen of Cups) – Although I am not adept at dealing with my own emotions, I am there for those I care about when it comes to theirs and trying to help them through times when they need a little extra emotional support.   I’m often very distant, but in these moments, I step forward without hesitation to offer what I can to give emotional support.

DECK USED:  EMBROIDERED FOREST TAROT