Tabula Mundi in Minima Tarot

No Crown Please

/ Twist the Leaf / 1 Comment

IMG_5933Today’s meditation was eleven minutes long and was a combination of a guided meditation with interval timer for my piriformis stretching.   After the advice of my Self Care Saturday reading this week, I was planning to incorporate some selenite and black tourmaline into my meditation, but I forgot.   I’ll do that tomorrow.

The topic of the guided meditation today was about allowing yourself to accept those things you don’t like about yourself, essentially accepting your shadow side, so that you can become a stronger and more completely whole person through the healing that that acceptance inspires.

Tarot of the Sidhe - The EmperorToday’s draw is the Emperor card, which is traditionally a representation of authority and leadership in the form of a “father” figure.  This is the father that rules with an iron fist, and yet always with the best interests of his family in his heart. Strong, and filled with determination, discipline, and control.

I don’t usually consider chaos a part of the Emperor card, but the imagery on this card very much strikes me as… chaotic. It reminds me of the representation of this card in the Japaritze Tarot, where the title of the card is “War” instead of “The Emperor”.

What I see here is chaos. And sacrifice. All for the greater good. And unlike chaos on its own, that is definitely something I feel is a part of the Emperor’s representation.

In this imagery, the flaming emperor’s robes slowly disintegrate into detritus on the earthen floor, creating the nutrients to grow fruit and other foods for the village in the distance. It’s true what they say that heavy is the head that wears the crown, for he burns with his responsibilities, and fulfills them by giving away pieces of himself and what is his.

The message here in this card today is to be grateful I am not the Emperor, and a reminder that that is not a position I want to be in. I put my all into the things that I hold dear and feel are my responsibilities, but I don’t want to give so much that it damages me in the process.

DECK USED:  TAROT OF THE SIDHE

#TarotForGrowthAugust Challenge Prompt
Topic: I’m struggling to move past trauma.
Question: How might clinging to that expectation of the healing process hinder my healing?

Tabula Mundi In Minima

Reading Summary: There’s no rest involved (Four of Swords Rx), creating a lack of true progress (Ten of Cups), which then leaves me having to start over (Ace of Disks).

Take Away:  My expectation (which was outlined in yesterday’s reading) is to fast, which means I don’t get the rest I need to heal properly.  Healing requires rest, and without the healing you can’t move forward out of the recovery stage and into something better.  This means that when you rush healing from trauma, the healing ends up incomplete and you end up having to start over.

DECK USED:  TABULA MUNDI IN MINIMA TAROT

#DiscordTarotholicsAug2020 Challenge Prompt
Topic: Do Spread #2
Question: Is my aunt moving out here from out east going to cause more problems between my mother and I?

Encore TarotReading Summary: Stand strong and stable (Four of Coins) in your place of power (Palace of Wands) and don’t allow her to take over (The Chariot).

Take Away:  The cards here indicate that in order to keep the peace, using my business as an excuse for lack of contact is the best strategy to make sure I’m able to keep my distance, regardless of the new proximity. So the answer here is that it is possible, but I have a good chance of circumventing a lot of the issues by using my responsibilities to the business to keep me from having to increase my exposure with the unpleasantness too many visits with my aunt and her toxicity.

DECK USED:  ENCORE TAROT

Lionharts #TheAugustTarot #ElementalChallenge
Question: How can I further strengthen my connection to the divine?

Tarot del Fuego

Reading Summary:  Make yourself comfortable (Four of Pentacles). Less harsh judgments (Judgement), more hope (The Star). Allow yourself to open up not just spiritually… but also physically (Ace of Pentacles).

Take Away:  This is about increasing my meditation practice, and making sure I stay on top of keeping my negative self narrative in check. By increasing the intent in my meditation and taking time to allow myself to not just do the meditation but really sink into it and get comfortable in it each time, I am opening myself up to divinity on a bigger and more significant level than the simple meditation that I regularly do each day.

By the same turn, my negative self talk is something that closes me off from both my inner self as well as from the divine.  So if I want to connect more strongly to the divine, it makes sense that I would need to foster more positive connections to both my spirituality and optimism, and let go of the negative self narrative that is one of my most self destructive habits.

DECK USED:  TAROT DEL FUEGO

#ConnectWithYourDeckChallenge by E Roebuck-Jones
Question: How can I be kinder to myself and to others?

Alan Tarot

To Be Kinder to Myself
Two of Spades, Five of Spades

To be kinder to myself, I need to make a concentrated and conscious choice to move past what makes me so cruel to myself. These judgements and negative self talk are not mine but belong to a place in my past where I had no control and was other the boot of another. Defeat the echoes of his voice in my head, and take away the spoils (your gained wisdom).

To Be Kinder to Others
Knight of Spades, Page of Hearts

To be kinder to others, I need to remember to take my experiences with pain and carry them forward into a place of understanding and warmth when dealing with others.  I’ve been through a lot, and this allows me a place of not just sympathy, but also empathy, with a lot of situations others are dealing with. Instead of looking at these situations as “I made it through, so can you” a better aspect to look at is to try and remember how I felt in these situations in the moment, and conveying to them that I understand what they’re going through and it’ll be okay.

DECK USED:  ALAN TAROT

It’s Okay to Open Up a Bit

/ Twist the Leaf / 1 Comment

Today’s meditation was ten minutes long, and was one of those harp strings meditations with the chimes set up to tell me when to shift between piriformis stretches.   The lack of time with the chiropractor is really starting to show in my stiffness and the amount of pain going on in my back and ribs during both my yoga and my meditation.  I’ve tried upping my yoga/physiotherapy to compensate, but it doesn’t seem to be helping.

Tarot of SidheToday’s draw is the Dreamer Princess (Page of Swords) which is traditionally a representation of a receptive omega energy in the areas of thoughts, intellect, aspirations, communication, and logic.

What really stands out to me in this card today is both the title at the bottom “Gift of Telling” and the swirling of leaves that spiral around the Fae before traveling off into the distance on the wind. These things remind me of reading to children at the library.  I don’t usually get on with children, which isn’t  surprising as I grew up very fast.   Yet, for a time in high school I volunteered at the library for work credit for one of my classes, and one of my favorite experiences was reading to the children for story time.

During this time, children would gather around and I would read to them from the pre-chosen book for the day, and they would all be so eager… engaged.  Some of them even came to sit closer or lean against me or my chair (depending on if I was sitting on the floor or not).   This was a time of learning for me, and of receptive learning… as well as a time of “Telling”.

This memory was triggered by this card today, and the message here is in the reminder that when you teach… you also learn.  It’s never one sided.  If you’re open to allowing others in you can get as much from teaching and sharing with others as you give.

DECK USED:  TAROT OF THE SIDHE

#TarotForGrowthAugust Challenge Prompt
Topic: I’m plagued by anxiety.
Question: How can I benefit from regarding anxiety as a messenger instead of an enemy?

Gypsy Palace Tarot

Reading Summary:  By not turning away from my anxiety and regarding it as disposable (Eight of Cups), it can then become empowering to both the heart (Queen of Cups) and mind (Queen of Swords) if I pay attention to what my anxiety is trying to tell me.

Take Away:  Yesterday the cards indicated that my anxiety is a way to keep me from becoming too comfortable and confident in my situation and stability. The cards here indicate that if I choose to listen to these warnings my anxiety brings up instead of ignoring them, it will allow me to find steadier footing by engaging my heart and mind into the equation so that I can weigh out how things are going more clearly.

DECK USED:  GYPSY PALACE TAROT

#DiscordTarotholicsAug2020 Challenge Prompt
Question: What joy in my life needs more recognition?

Tarot del FuegoReading Summary: My ability to see different perspectives (The Hanged Man) on the painful crap that happens (Ten of Swords) then opens me up to a wider variety of choices and opens up more opportunities to me than I would otherwise have (Six of Cups).

Take Away:  I’m not entirely sure that I would consider this a joy? But I think that the answer possibly applies anyway, as having the ability to have all these choices before me creates opportunities for me to instill more joy in my life.   So then, the joy in my life that needs recognition is not the joy sitting before me, but rather the potential for joy that I disregard when looking over all those options and opportunities set out before me..

DECK USED:  TAROT DEL FUEGO

Lionharts #TheAugustTarot#ElementalChallenge
Question: What emotions serve me better released instead of held on to?

Tabula Mundi in Minima Tarot

Four of Cups – It’s better to allow my love to wash over others than to hold it in and be restrained. It shouldn’t be saved to be expressed just for special occasions, but spread throughout each and every day.

The Emperor – Release your need to be so rigid in so many aspects of your life.  When you hold on to things too tightly, you run the risk of crushing them to dust.

Six of Wands – Allow others to see the lighter side of your personality.  You don’t need to be withdrawn and serious all the time.  You have a warmth within you that you feel towards others, but are always so scared to display to them.  It’s okay to let that warmth out and express it more freely.

DECK USED:  TABULA MUNDI IN MINIMA TAROT

#ConnectWithYourDeckChallenge by E Roebuck-Jones
Question: What holds me back?

El Gran Tarot Esoterico

Reading Summary: It is a form of emotional immaturity (Page of Cups Rx) to fight against catastrophe (The Tower) instead of just rolling with the punches (Seven of Swords) and allowing them to do what they’re here to do and create a new home and stability in the wake (Four of Swords).

Take Away:  Stop fussing over the shit that might come, or the mess it might make when it arrives.  It solves nothing and simply stalls you out.  The advice here is to instead allow the chaos to come, let it wash over you, and ride it out to the other side.  Have faith in the universe and that everything will balance out in the end.

DECK USED:  EL GRAN TAROT ESOTERICO

Preparation and Strategy

/ Twist the Leaf / 1 Comment

Today’s meditation was ten minutes long and was one of the harp string meditations. It was relaxing but it was cut a little short by the phone ringing.  You can probably guess who was on the other end, yeah?   Anyway, the phone call kind of fucked with my zen, but at the same time?  I think that my meditation right before the call also helped me in dealing with her a bit better than usual.

Next World TarotToday’s draw is the Queen of Swords, which is traditionally a representation of a receptive alpha energy in the area of one’s thoughts, logic, communication, and intellect.

This is a woman prepared.  That was the first thought that came to mind when I saw the imagery on this card this morning.  Not only does she have her sword and clearly appears to know how to use it, but she’s wearing sturdy boots, has her lunch box along as well as a bit of extra food on the side.  Colorful trillium shaped flowers blooming behind her combined with the delicate pink accents of her skirt speak of a secret softness mostly hidden, but she is focused and braced, ready for anything that comes her way.

What I see here is a message about preparation and organization (I mean, look at how neatly those fruit are lined up with the lunch box, yeah?)   It’s about having your ducks in a row, and being prepared for what is to come.

Even though I am taking a few days off, my mind is still turning over strategy and preparing for what is to come as the holiday rush creeps closer and closer.   I might not be putting my hands to work, but my mind is not so easy to restrain.  And maybe that’s okay, as long as I’m not pushing or stressing myself out.

That peek of softness also holds a second message in today’s card.  A reminder that even when you need to be on your guard, you don’t have to lose yourself in the process.

DECK USED:  NEXT WORLD TAROT

#TarotForGrowthAugust Challenge Prompt
Topic: I’m plagued by anxiety.
Question: What is my anxiety trying to tell me?

Tabula Mundi in Minima

Reading Summary:  Life is cyclical but can often also be overwhelming (The Universe). Your emotions are just a little too close to the surface (imagery in the Queen of Cups). Take a step back and make sure you’re still on track and in control of your trajectory (Two of Wands).

Take Away:  My anxiety has actually been quite a bit better lately, but when it starts to spike, the message is usually one of three. It’s telling me that 1) I’m approaching a state of overwhelm, 2) it’s trying to tell me that my emotions are a little too close to the surface and that is causing me to be reactionary, or 3) I need to check in with my direction upon my path and make sure I’m still on track.

DECK USED:  TABULA MUNDI TAROT  IN MINIMA

#DiscordTarotholicsAug2020 Challenge Prompt
Topic: Use Your Logic With This / Use Your Intuition With This

Gypsy Palace TarotUse Your Logic With This – Ten of Pentacles – When planning for the future and preserving the stability in my life that is so important to me, it is important to apply logic to the equation and methods.  Reacting with emotion or impulsivity will not get me where I want to go, instead I need to strategize and use my mind and logic to get there.

Use Your Intuition With This – The Hermit –  Sometimes when I need to retreat and be with myself, it’s in reaction to hurt or emotional upheaval.  These are not the times it is healthy to take that alone time.   I need to listen not with my emotions or my pain for these times of retreat, but instead listen to my intuition and allow that to guide me to when it is healthy and beneficial to retreat.

DECK USED:  GYPSY PALACE TAROT

Lionharts #TheAugustTarot#ElementalChallenge
Question: Fire, how can I attract exactly what I want to manifest?

Pride Tarot

Reading Summary: Be more open and free with my praise (The Messenger) for myself and others, while practicing acceptance (Three of Pentacles) of those things you don’t necessarily agree with concerning others (imagery in The Wheel of Fortune).

Take Away:  If I want to attract the things I want to manifest in life, I need to be kinder to myself and less judgemental of others.   Sometimes being close to others is a struggle for me, especially when certain qualities are displayed such as carelessness and immaturity.  The cards indicate that if I want to smooth out the bumps in the road before me, I need to understand that offering them praise for those things I agree with is okay, even while the things I disagree with keep me at a distance.

DECK USED:  PRIDE TAROT