Student Tarot v4

The Benefits of Holding Space

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Today’s meditation was ten minutes long, and was one of the #DailyTrip sessions from the @Calm app.

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Student Tarot v4's King of CupsThe @GlitterbyInk #MayTag25 Challenge
Celebrating Our Community Prompt for May 19 : Caring

Today’s draw is the King of Cups, which is traditionally a representation of a projective alpha energy, personality, or person in the area of one’s emotions, relationships, emotional intelligence, creativity, or intuition. This often translates into authority figures that are emotionally supportive and understanding, possessing both compassion and strong leadership qualities.

It’s nice when they care, yeah? Whether it’s at work, or family, or social situations, being under the leadership of those that actually care about you and how you feel is nice.

Too often those in charge are so focused on productivity, profit, or their own agendas that they forget to see the people they are leading as anything more than a means to an end. They forget to check in on how others are doing and how they are feeling. They forget the human aspect of leadership involves connection and caring.

The combination of today’s prompt and card of the day is a reminder of that aspect. Nearly everyone leads others in some capacity. The message today is to seek out where we hold these roles in our lives and encourages us to take the time and effort to care about those we lead. Ensure they are okay… listen to their concerns. Hold space for them to share with you in the spirit of support and caring. In return you reap the rewards in the loyalty and trust such interest and caring fosters.

DECK USED:  STUDENT TAROT v4

#detarotjufmeitarotchallenge Tea With the Queens Challenge by @de_tarotjuf
Tea with the Queen of Cups : Emotional Intelligence and Care
Prompts for May 20 – 21

Oracle Reading with the Fateful Signs OracleWhat are my emotional pillars?

Odin’s Ravens – Connecting with those closest to you that know you well and know your secrets.

Thought and reason creates for you a sense of stability.

Spending time in nature and connecting with liminal spaces and the unseen.

How can I improve my relationships?

Donar, The Sky King – Stay true to yourself while seeking advice from others. These two things are not mutually exclusive, and combining them can give you clarity and direction. Remember that listening to others often creates a deeper connection than sharing with them, so speak less and listen more.

Other elements included in this reading:
Foraged Cedar Tips for Protection Against Negative Influences
Lace Agate for Increasing Inner Stability
Clear Quartz Crescent for Amplification of Lunar Energies
Selenite for Purification and drawing in Positive Energy

DECK USED: FATEFUL SIGNS ORACLE

Daily Self Kindness

Ginger tea today with my muffin, even though ginger tea really isn’t one of my favorite types. Even mixed with chamomile it’s just not a flavor that I find appealing in tea. I needed the benefits it could provide, though, so I had it anyway.

The Dip in the Cycle

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Today’s meditation was ten minutes long and was one of the harp strings meditations with interval timers.  I was right yesterday, when I said that I would be more sore today than usual after I upped my yoga/physio practice and extra stretching.  I think it was a good choice, though.  My body had become used to the normal routine, so it’s good to mix it up just a bit.

Herbcrafter's TarotToday’s draw is The Fool card, which is traditionally interpreted as a representation of innocence and carefree enthusiasm.

The Fool is all about new beginnings, and what better symbol to use for The Fool that the Dandelion.  This is an herb that crops up seemingly on its own, and crops up… and crops up… and crops up.  It multiplies like crazy, flourishes again and again and has a life cycle that returns to be renewed over and over.

Metaphysically, the dandelion is about surviving through challenges and difficulties by rising above through the power of warmth, positivity and hope.

The message in today’s card is to reach for that positivity… reach for the optimism and the hope.  Remember that the subdrop, like all unpleasant moments of emotional upheaval, is just a phase in a cycle that is mostly good.  Almost all good.  But every cycle has to have a dip somewhere along the path.  It’s temporary, and you’ll be rolling back around to somewhere more positive soon enough.

DECK USED:  HERBCRAFTER’S TAROT

#DiscordTarotholicsJul2020 Challenge Prompt
Topic:  Take For Myself / Give To Others

Aquarian TarotTake For Myself – Nine of Pentacles – You need alone time in which to enjoy the fruits of your labors without others around to distract or otherwise detract from the experience. There’s nothing wrong with this, so take that time when you need it.

Give to Others – Three of Cups Rx –  This fits in with the “take for myself” part of the reading, as it speaks of allowing others to go have their fun without me. You don’t need to be there for everything and you don’t really want to be even if you could.   So let go of the feeling of “slacking off” or “neglect” that comes up whenever you leave everyone to their own devices and go off on your own.

DECK USED:  AQUARIAN TAROT

#OwlandBonesJuly Challenge by Owl and Bones Tarot
Topic:  practice // practice // practice

Minchiate Etruria Anima Antiqua

Aquarius and Three of Cups Rx – Practice at optimism. In the Minchiate Etruria, the Three of Cups is about a favorable turn of events, or an unusual and unexpected circumstance. The Aquarius is about having an open mind and open heart. Together, these two cards are an encouragement towards optimism, and making sure that you look for the positive opportunities presented through unexpected events.

Four of Staves – Practice at attuning to the “harmonious” coming together of different energies and forces.  Sometimes when things come together, they do so like pieces of a puzzle falling into place. Don’t take these moments for granted or let them to pass you by. Instead, pay attention and learn how to better identify when opportunities are presented through this union of harmonious energies.

House of the Devil (The Tower) – Practice trusting in things to balance themselves out when in the middle of chaos.  Sometimes it’s easy to get caught up in the moment and all the cacophony of sudden change.  It’s important during these times to remember that this shit is temporary.  It’s a shift.  Like an earthquake shifts the earth, and then the earth settles into a new configuration afterward.  So too does the calamity and chaos of change settle into a new configuration of reality.

DECK USED:  MINCHIATE ETRURIA ANIMA ANTIQUA TAROT

#ConnectWithYourDeckChallenge by E Roebuck-Jones
Question:  When am I most creatively confident?

Student Tarot v4 Godard's Birds

Reading Summary:  When I actually make the choice (Two of Swords) to make the time for creative writing (imagery in the Six of Cups) with Gideon (The Lovers and The Empress).

Take Away: Gideon is expressed here by both the Lovers and the Empress, because he represents both of these themes to me at once.  He is my love, my choice, and my committment.  He is also my comfort and my encouragement.  He provide me these things along with his love and his support, while still fostering my own strength at the same time.

It makes sense, then, that when I am creating with him, it would be one of the times when I am at my most creative.  We create worlds together, lives together, stories together. We bounce ideas off of each other, and weave those ideas and our mutual creativity together into wondrous expressions of our emotions, our dedication, our passions, our desires, and our love for each other again and again.

DECK USED:  STUDENT TAROT v4 GODARD’S BIRDS

Desires vs Reality

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Today’s meditation was ten minutes long and was another of the harp string meditations with the interval chimes.  It was very relaxing and I dozed off somewhere near the end and had a pretty good sleep.  I’m not calling it a “nap” because it really did feel more like I had gone to bed and had a good sleep, even though it only lasted probably an hour or so.  I didn’t wake up so much “refreshed” as just a bit more energized with muscle strain eased.

Cosmos Tarot and OracleToday’s draw is the Five of Water (Five of Cups) for the second day in a row. As I mentioned (just yesterday), the traditional interpretation of this card is about disappointment, pessimism, feelings of failure, and that “sour grapes” feeling of the glass being half empty.

I love the imagery of this card today.  It is… I find it breathtaking, and so fitting, all at once.  I see the image of an individual looking up at what they can’t have instead of enjoying what they have in this image.  Sea monster or not, that look at what lies beyond their reach is something I can relate to, and it still lingers upon the topic of my mother and her manipulations.

Every time she takes me by surprise, I feel so damned stupid.  And the fact is, that it’s that Five of Cups theme that creates the opportunity for those feelings to surface.  It’s that wanting for what I can’t have… that desire for what’s beyond my reach that causes the disappointment.

I desire the mother that loves me.  I deserve a mother that cherishes me.   Maybe, in her own way, she does both of these ways.  But it’s not in any way that I can personally see.  It’s not in any form that is identifiable to me.   My expectations are not helping this situation and I need to let them go, and accept things as they are.

DECK USED:  COSMOS TAROT AND ORACLE

#TarotForGrowthJuly Challenge Prompt
Topic:  I’m so burnt out all the time.
Question:  How can I be proactive, rather than simply reactive, about rest?

Lumina Tarot

Reading Summary: Stay in touch with how you’re feeling (Knight of Cups) and own it (the curl of the Fox’s tail in the Queen of Wands), and understand that it is fully acceptable (Six of Wands) to need rest.

Take Away: Part of the reason I habitually hit burnout again and again is because instead of staying in touch with how I am feeling, I push the warning signs away and shove them into a dark corner instead of listening to them.  By pushing these warning signs and struggles away, I can then plow forward and continue to push myself harder and harder, as I was always taught is the “right” thing to do.

If I want to be more proactive about my rest, I need to connect with those feelings and warning signs instead of ignoring them, and accept that it’s a part of being human to need rest, and not a failing on my part.

DECK USED:  LUMINA TAROT

#DiscordTarotholicsJul2020 Challenge Prompt
Topic:  Hidden Strength / Secret Weakness

Tarot MaddonniHidden Strength – Nine of Pentacles – Creating stability, and the ability to be alone. I don’t need other people to entertain me or keep me company, I’m more than capable of doing that for myself. My independence is one of my greatest strengths, and not one that is obvious to everyone.

Secret Weakness – Three of Swords – I am my own worst enemy and my depression is my hidden secret weakness. I’m upfront about the fact that I deal with depression and have done so throughout my life… and yet when a depressive episode comes upon me, I work to hide it both from others as well as myself.

DECK USED:  TAROT MADDONNI

#OwlandBonesJuly Challenge by Owl and Bones Tarot
Topic:  be proud // be humble // be brave // be strong

Student Tarot v4 Godard's Birds

Be Proud – The Lovers – I make good choices. This is something that I can take pride in.  Whether these choices are for my benefit or the benefit of others, whether it is in the person I have partnered with, or the employers I work for, or anything else.  In the end, with the guidance of my intuition and my moral compass, I make good choices.

Be Humble – The Star – I don’t know everything when it comes to spiritual matters. Fortunately, I’m not someone that struggles with saying “I don’t know” when I don’t know the answer to something, but I think sometimes I do come off as more knowledgeable on certain subjects than I am, simply because I am confident of my own personal path.

Be Brave – Ten of Pentacles -Sometimes even when you have stability and security in your life?  It feels like it’s not enough, or like it might be taken away from you on the whims of fate alone.  Obtainment doesn’t necessarily mean anything if you can’t hold onto what you want once you get it. It takes bravery.  Not just to go after what you want, but also to admit you want it and to work at holding onto it even after you have it.

Be Strong – The Moon – It can be hard to be strong in times of uncertainty, but remember that these times are transient.  Their impermanence means that no matter how confusing or uncertain things might seem in the moment?  Eventually it will all come clear again.  It just takes some strength and perseverance to get through to the other side.

DECK USED:  STUDENT TAROT v4 GODARD’S BIRDS

#ConnectWithYourDeckChallenge by E Roebuck-Jones
Topic:  The part of my world that inspires me is…

Karma Tarot

Reading Summary: Guiding others (Grand Master) in sorting out (Justice) their struggles and worries (Nine of Swords) so that they can make gradual progress toward a better future (Knight of Coins).

Side note: For some reason the Grand Master (Hierophant) in this deck always makes me think of the caterpillar in Alice in Wonderland.  I’m not sure why.

Take Away:  I’m not sure if the feeling I get from helping others with their path so much inspires me, as it kindles a feeling of warmth and positivity within my soul.  Perhaps that could actually be considered inspiration of a sort, though.  Not so much creative inspiration, and yet inspiration all the same.

DECK USED:  KARMA TAROT

The Nature of Things

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Today’s meditation was skipped.  This is because I pulled an all-nighter last night with L packaging orders to ship out today.  We didn’t finish until nearly six in the morning.  At which point I went to bed to sleep and woke up just in time to haul ass to go get the packages out in the mail before the last mail truck left.  So… I didn’t get to either my yoga/physiotherapy or my meditation today, and I’m sure to pay for it for a couple of days to come.

Cosmos Tarot and OracleToday’s draw is the Eight of Air (Eight of Swords) which is traditionally a representation of… well essentially, being in your own way and/or blinding yourself to your own obstacles and as a result making things more difficult than they have to be.  It’s all about getting in your own way, and all of the ways in which that can play out.

This is not what I see in this card, though. At all. I’m actually a bit confused by my reaction to this card as I’m struggling with the color combinations, which I find a bit disorienting.

What I see in this card today is in the imagery of the fox and the goose.  It is a display of one’s inner nature, much like the old fable of the frog and the scorpion.  It feels like a warning, although I’m not entirely sure what the warning is about.

So I would say that the message in today’s card is about making sure you are paying attention to the world around you, and those that surround you.  If something seems off and out of place? Pay attention. Be aware when people’s actions are not matching the energy you feel coming from them.   Don’t discount it as a fluke or unimportant.  It’s not as inconsequential as you would like to believe.

DECK USED:  COSMOS TAROT AND ORACLE

#TarotForGrowthJuly Challenge Prompt
Topic:  I’m so overwhelmed.
Question: What can I do to release my fear of saying no?

Midcenturian Tarot

Reading Summary: Embrace the natural cycles of life (Ten of Swords) instead of fearing them (The Moon). Focus on developing your skill at regulating output and practice some patience (Temperance).

Take Away:  I’ve had a bit of a stalker thing going on with the Temperance card lately, and I wonder if this is the message that the card is trying to convey.  It is a message about honing my regulating and moderation skills, and incorporating patience to do so.  This is especially important in the saying “no” to adding too much onto my plate at once.

Add to that the need to get a handle on the trepidation that I feel when it seems something might be coming to an end.  I try and sustain too much because I want to keep going what is before me and try new things and develop new possibilities.  The problem is, when you preserve one while still working on adding and growth at the same time?  Your plate fills up super fast.

Together these two messages indicate a need to learn how to decide on what “phase out” and what to keep going.

DECK USED:  MIDCENTURIAN TAROT

#DiscordTarotholicsJul2020 Challenge Prompt
Question:  Where do I need to focus on directing more gratitude?

The Fifth TarotReading Summary: When you’re feeling overwhelmed by choices (Seven of Shells), don’t just toss in the towel and walk away (Eight of Shells Rx).  Instead stick around and weather through the storm (Apprentice of Feathers), and allow Gideon to help support you through these times (Elementor of Shells).

Take Away:  The support that Gideon provides me in my day to day life is what I need to focus more gratitude toward at this time. He is there for me every day, and in any way that I need him.  All I ever need to do is reach out, and there he is, ready and not just willing to help, but eager to help. He is my comfort, my anchor, my rock… and he is the calm in the storm when I am feeling overwhelmed and struggling with my own inner demons… or the outer ones as well.

I feel that I often come off as ungrateful for all of these things.  Too wrapped up in my own shit, I forget to look up and look outward, and to acknowledge how much he loves me and how very invested he is in me.. in my life.  In anything and everything I need from him.  I am so very lucky.  And so very grateful.  I wish I was able to express it better, but I will continue to try to both notice these things more… and express my gratitude more clearly and more often.

DECK USED:  THE FIFTH TAROT

#OwlandBonesJuly Challenge by Owl and Bones Tarot
Topic:  sharpen // soften

Student Tarot v4 Godard's BirdsSharpen – Page of Wands – Now would be a good time to sharpen your focus upon those things that inspire you and create within you a spark of curiosity.  Experiment and explore the ideas that kindle your inner spark, and release those that can’t hold up to that sharper focus.

Soften – Queen of Swords and Eight of Pentacles – Stop judging yourself and your work so harshly.  Use your keen intellect to find potential outlets for your skills that will be of benefit instead of standing on the fence and waffling because your inner critic is having a heyday in your head.

DECK USED:  STUDENT TAROT v4 GODARD’S BIRDS

#ConnectWithYourDeckChallenge by E Roebuck-Jones
Question:  What do I feel when I work on something creative?

Psychopomp Tarot

Reading Summary: Release (Ten of Wands Rx and Three of Swords Rx) and the birth of positive emotion in its place (Ace of Cups).

Take Away:  There is a release in being creative. When I have pent up creative energy, it becomes a burden of sorts.  A struggle of tamped down and clogged up energy that builds in pressure within me. When I create something new and allow my creative spark freedom to play, it releases this tension in my chest and it is like opening up a special part of my soul to breathe.

At the same time, this release can also be emotional, as when I create there is an element of emotion to it. A letting go of doubts and worries and inner judgements in order to instead wallow in potential and energies that feel positive and pleasing.

In both of these types of release, there is then an opening for something else to sweep in.  And when I am enjoying my creative process, what sweeps in to replace these unpleasant sensations, emotions, and energy… are feelings of positivity.  Emotional positivity that is new and bright and shiny, and not yet touched by or tarnished by the unpleasant effects of my inner critic’s negative dialogue.

DECK USED:  PSYCHOPOMP TAROT

Choosing Freedom

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Today’s meditation was skipped because I chose to oversleep and then had to scramble to get my ass up and moving in order to get everything done that I need to get done today.  I will try to do it before bed tonight, and then get back on track with morning meditations starting tomorrow.

Cosmos Tarot and Oracle - Ten of FireToday’s draw is the Ten of Fire (Ten of Wands) which is traditionally a representation of burden and overwhelm of responsibilities or obligations.   It is a card filled with feelings of hard work that have turned into drudgery.

I actually do not see any of that in this card’s imagery, or really in the key words either, for that matter.  In fact, what I see in the imagery of this card has more to do with release and freedom. This is depicted twofold in this card’s imagery.   First, through the releasing of the birds to find their flight and freedom in the sky.  And second, in releasing the birds, the woman in the card is also released from the responsibility of caring for them and thus free of her burden of responsibility.

The message in this card is an encouragement to release some of my own burdens, and this is something that I’ve actually made the decision to do and, in fact, have already put in motion the process of doing.   I’m taking a week off from the business.  I’ll still be working at the farm and the salon, but I will not allow either of them to increase my hours during this week either.     I need to step back and take some breaths of fresh air away from the constant cycle of work that the business creates.

I need a break, and I’m going to allow myself to take it.

DECK USED:  COSMIC TAROT AND ORACLE

#TarotForGrowthJuly Challenge Prompt
Topic: I’m struggling with self-worth.
Question: Do my issues with self-worth require professional attention? How can I set my shame or guilt aside enough to more easily approach these issues with my therapist?

Midcenturian Tarot

Do my issues with self-worth require professional attention? – Three of Wands beneath The Chariot – You’re already on this path. You have direction and control in this moment over these issues and your therapist has given you the tools needed to prepare you as you move forward along your path.

How can I set my shame or guilt aside enough to more easily approach these issues with my therapist? – Two of Pentacles and Two of Swords – When you have need of your therapist’s help, you need to weigh your options and make a choice to do something about it instead of hanging back and waffling.

Take Away: Yes. Sometimes I need help with my self esteem issues.

Depression, which is my mental health issue predilection, is said to be hatred turned upon the self, and this is true in my personal experience.  Not that self hatred turned on the self creates depression, but that depression creates the cycle that turns hatred inward on yourself. At these times, I do need professional help.

Sometimes?  The depression sneaks up on me at a slow creep, and while I have an inkling of an idea that it’s coming or even has arrived, I waffle on getting help too long and slide into a deep pit of a depressive episode as a result.   A better choice is to not waffle, but call right away as soon as the first hint of what’s coming is noticed.

DECK USED:  MIDCENTURIAN TAROT

#DiscordTarotholicsJul2020 Challenge Prompt
Topic:  Act on This / Let this Rest

Veleda Woods TarotAct On This – Five of Cups – Work at letting go of your apathy and inner dissonance. Do not allow yourself to sink into these feelings, as they are not good for you and will hinder your path forward.  Instead, focus on rising above and finding the “sunlight through the clouds”.  There’s just as much good in the world as there is bad, so turn your attention from the “broken stems” in life and look for the good instead.

Let This Rest – Harvester of Swords Rx and The Devil – It’s time to lay off  a bit on shopping for your addiction. You have lots of preorders and kickstarters coming over the next few months, as well as orders that have not yet come in due to shipping delays. This does not necessarily mean cutting yourself off entirely as that would create a sense of deprivation and resentment, but it’s time to ease back for a bit.

DECK USED:  VELEDA WOODS TAROT

#OwlandBonesJuly Challenge by Owl and Bones Tarot
Topic:  within // without

Student Tarot 4 Godard's BirdsWithin – Wheel of Fortune – You need to focus on being centered and more adaptable.  Don’t allow inner chaos to take hold and run rampant.  Do what you need to in order to keep yourself balanced and centered.

Without – Empress and The Lovers – Take time to appreciate all of the nurturing and love that you receive from others, and most especially from Gideon.  There is a great deal of love in your life, directed at you every single day in so many different ways.  Don’t take this for granted, but instead accept that love and nurturing care, and enjoy it rather than ignoring it or disregarding.

DECK USED:  STUDENT TAROT v4 GODARD’S BIRDS

#ConnectWithYourDeckChallenge by E Roebuck-Jones
Question: What moment from today do I feel is memorable?

Women of Science Tarot

Reading Summary: My decision (Five of Micro) to do something different (The World) and prioritize my inner knowledge and needs above my outer ones (The High Priestess).

Side Note:  The interpretation of these three cards is based off the imagery on the cards rather than their tarot meanings. In some cases, there is some overlap, especially in the third card… I just wanted to point out that in this case I wasn’t paying attention to the suits and traditional meanings.

Take Away:  I mentioned this in my COTD analysis, but I made the decision today that even though I’m not going anywhere, I’m going to put my shops / business on hold for a week and just take some time away from it to get a little distance and perspective. This is an extremely difficult decision for me, but I’ve already put everything in place and my “vacation” will start tomorrow after I’ve dropped off all my packages at the post office.

DECK USED:  WOMEN OF SCIENCE TAROT

Soothing Warmth

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Today’s meditation was just over ten minutes long and was one of the harp tone meditations where I sink into the sounds of the harp while chimes mark position changes for my piriformis stretching. It was easy and relaxing, and went by really quickly for some reason.  It’s odd how some days, that ten minutes can feel like an hour… and other days it feels like just a few minutes instead of a whole ten.

Herbcrafter's Tarot - Madre of Fire - ThymeToday’s draw is the Madre of Fire (Queen of Wands) which is traditionally interpreted as a receptive alpha energy, personality, or person in the areas of one’s drive, passionate endeavors, interests, and inner spark.

What stood out to me the strongest in the imagery of this card today (besides the huge harvest of thyme) was the honey pot. Thymus vulgaris and honey are used to make natural cough syrup that has a warming and soothing effect on both wet and dry coughs as well as bronchitis.

The message I hear from this card today is that I need to focus on some self soothing.  There’s been a bit of irritation going on lately that flares up then eases and flares up again over the past couple of weeks.   I’ve not been able to really find an underlying source, and the card here indicates maybe the goal shouldn’t be so much about digging in the dirt, but in easing the blisters on my fingertips.

DECK USED:  THE HERBCRAFTER’S TAROT

#DiscordTarotholicsJul2020 Challenge Prompt
Question: What does my subconscious want to say that I’m ignoring?

Student Tarot 4 Godard's BirdsReading Summary: Instant gratification (Queen of Swords) is all well and good, but you need to seize control of yourself (King of Swords) now so that you don’t lose sight of the long-term growth (Seven of Pentacles) that is your ultimate goal.

Side Note:  Instant gratification indicated in the Queen of Swords is in reference to me relating the Queen of Swords to my mother, and my mother’s nearly universal attitude of “I want what I want, and I want it NOW”.  This is a personal correlation and “instant gratification” is not normally associated with the Queen of Swords.

Take Away:  It’s time to slow down on my spending a bit and take a more measured approach so that I don’t find myself in hot water down the road.  I did a bit of splurging on playing card decks over the past month, and while those decks are pretty inexpensive (compared to tarot), they still add up over time.   Add to that a bit of carelessness in my grocery spending, and I’m at that point where I need to get things back in hand again.

DECK USED:  STUDENT TAROT 4 GODARD’S BIRDS