Shadowland Tarot

Clean Slates

/ Twist the Leaf / 1 Comment

Today’s meditation was skipped.

Shadowland TarotToday’s draw is the Tower card, which is traditionally a representation of sudden change, chaotic transformation, destruction, and the tearing down of something within one’s life or beliefs that leaves room for something new to take its place.

Sometimes? No matter how much you try to mitigate the damage, the “fall” is unavoidable.  That’s what I see here in the imagery for this card, wth a figure blasted off the tower of the building in the background trying to use an umbrella to slow their plummet to the ground.  An umbrella is not going to cut it, though.

That is because there are always going to be times when only a full and complete destruction will lead us to the new path we are meant to tread. Otherwise?  We cling to the shreds of the old instead of committing ourselves completely to the new.

I am absolutely guilty of this, and got smacked in the face with it earlier when I thought my phone had bit the dust. In the end, it was fixable and I get to cling to my old phone just a little longer…  but at the same time, this experience, and today’s card, make it clear it’s time to look into an upgrade whether I want to or not.

DECK USED:  SHADOWLAND TAROT

HealingThruTarot’s October Shadow Work Challenge Prompt
Question for October 10th: What emotions do I struggle to express?

Golden Age of Horror Comics TarotThe “Fuck It, I Quit” Emotions – Eight of Cups and Half Bat Boy – You have a hard time walking away from things, especially those that you’ve put a lot of effort in. You continue trying to “make it work” instead of just letting it go.

Contentment When Things Aren’t “Just Right” – Nine of Cups and Bumble Beast – You can’t just say “it’s fine” when something doesn’t fit for you. Neither can you hide that it isnt a good fit.

Hope in Times of Struggle – The Star and Gunbeam Bread – You are far more likely to keep your head down and push onward when hardship hits than express hope and positivity.  It’s just part of who you are to try and work through it and try to ignore the problems rather than approach them from an angle of positivity.

DECK USED: GOLDEN AGE OF HORROR COMICS TAROT AND FEARSOME WEIRDOS CARD COLLECTION

#DiscordTarotholicsOct2022 Challenge Prompt
Shadowland TarotQuestion for October 10th: Trick – What is fooling you that needs to be seen more clearly?

Reading Summary:  Are you really resting (Four of Swords Rx) when you forsake pleasure and fun (Ten of Cups Rx) for leaning in with determination toward your goals and ambitions (Ace of Wands)?

Take Away: Time off is not time off unless you actually rest, recover, and have a little fun.

This week is supposed to be your time off, and these cards are stating that sitting at home throughout the entire week looking at all the stuff that needs to be done is not healthy for you at this time. Do the thing, step outside your comfort zone, and give yourself what you need to truly rest and recover before it’s too late and there’s no more time for these things until after the New Year.

DECK USED: SHADOWLAND TAROT

Daily Self Kindness

I took the advice of the cards above and did the spontaneous thing.  Taking advantage of a free night at a hotel, I gave myself an entire day of forest and woods and beach and sea air.  I spent the entire day outside and getting in touch with nature.

The Sky Is Falling

/ Twist the Leaf / 2 Comments

sacredToday’s meditation was just over twenty minutes long and a bit different than my normal meditation.   I tried another of those “meet your spirit guides” meditations from YouTube.

There’s a couple of different things that I realized from today’s meditation that might be why I’m struggling with the guided meditations of this nature.

The first thing is the fact that they don’t really do any sort of guided relaxation beforehand.  They just jump right in without any “take a breath” or “relax your muscles” or any relaxation technique before getting started.    I think that this is something that would really help me in finding that level of consciousness that would get me where I need to be in the meeting your guides part of the meditation.

The second thing that I noticed is that literally all of the meditations I’ve tried on this topic are essentially astral travel assisted connections. They all involve the whole “rising above” out of body type guidance that you are given for astral travel work.  The problem with this is that I don’t astral travel. Can’t, actually.  The prevailing theory is that it is because I’m so grounded, and so deeply rooted into that grounding, that I can’t rise into that airy un-grounded space and float free. Regardless of the reason why, though, the fact of the matter is that I did really well with the meditation right up until the point that they tried to get me into the astral plane, and then… it all fell to shit.

So… I will keep trying.  Maybe if I listen to enough of them sooner or later I will have learned enough of the non-astral methodology that I can then piece those parts together into a more grounded method that might work specifically for me.

Nine of Zephyrs - Nine of Swords - Stolen Child TarotToday’s draw is the Nine of Zephyrs (Nine of Swords) which is traditionally a representation of worries, anxieties and mental overwhelm leading to themes that do with anxiety and occasionally mental illness.

When I saw the card today, what really stuck out to me was the phrase “the sky is falling” which then brought to mind the story of Chicken Little from which that phrase originated.

This story is essentially about blowing things out of proportion which I didn’t really have a match for until this evening and the need to step back from a situation and allow others to deal with and handle it.  Normally, it’s the sort of situation I would step in and act on, but I was unable to do so in this instance because I might have been overreacting and blowing things out of proportion due of my own personal issues concerning those involved.

It was… ridiculously hard to step away.

DECK USED:  STOLEN CHILD TAROT

#DiscordTarotholicsApr2020 Challenge Prompt
Question: Am I ethically obligated to improve myself?

White Sage TarotReading Summary: When you improve yourself (Page of Wands) you create a healing and stability (Four of Swords) that spreads outward to heal the world (The Sun).

Take Away:  Absolutely. As I improve myself, I subsequently improve the world around me. Ethically speaking, it is the most base and basic way in which we can improve the world and the lives of others. Butterfly effect. 

DECK USED:  WHITE SAGE TAROT

#ConnectWithYourDeckChallenge by E Roebuck-Jones
Question: What does my inner critic say to me most often?

Shadowland Tarot

Reading Summary: It picks at my scarcity issues (Four of Cups) and my fear of losing my stability (Two of Pentacles). Other two cards are advice. Be good to yourself (Empress) and lighten up (The Sun).  And, just sayin’? That Four of Cups so very speaks to me of those scarcity issues btw. LOL

Take Away:  Scarcity and my fear of things falling apart are really my biggest fears, and are also the fears that were triggered the most strongly at the beginning of this pandemic.  Although I’ve gotten a handle on those fears, that is where my inner critic tries to pick at the most when it raises its ugly head.

The cards were also kind enough to give me encouragement, though (cuz I pushed for a third card rather than letting it stick with the first two) in the form of advice, reminding me that I need to be kind to myself and make an effort to strive towards optimism when my inner critic is trying to pick at those worries.

DECK USED:  SHADOWLAND TAROT

Accepting Help

/ Twist the Leaf / 1 Comment

IMG_3695Today’s meditation was just under twelve minutes long and focused upon a full body scan where the guide took the attention through each muscle of the body instead of each part of the body.

I’m a big fan of this sort of meditation, and I like the specificity of doing the body scan from muscle to muscle rather than body part to body part, but I feel that if we are going to do it muscle by muscle, it needs to be a longer meditation.

I don’t feel I get enough time focusing on moving my breath through each muscle when they try to cram the whole body into a twelve minute session.   This could easily be stretched into a good thirty or forty minutes and I probably would have still enjoyed it immensely.

Five of Pentacles - Stolen Child TarotToday’s draw is the Five of Oak (Five of Pentacles) which is a representation of tests, trials, and struggles in the area of finance, health, resources, and the hearth and home.  This often translates into themes concerning scarcity issues, financial losses and/or poverty, as well as all of the worries and sense of isolation that can accompany these themes.

What really stands out to me today in this card is the mice and the honeycomb.  Although the badger child hoards his honeycomb, there is enough to go around for all to partake.  Sometimes when you’re in need, it’s hard to look up from your struggles to see where a helping hand may lie.  These rats have chosen to look up and although the badger child wishes to keep all that goodness to themselves, they share regardless.

The message here is that reluctant charity is still charity, and we all need a bit of charity now and then.  Don’t ignore what’s being offered just because it’s coming from someone or somewhere you’d usually reject out of principle.  This message fits in very well with some issues that happened today concerning my building and the need to take a run to the hardware store for supplies with… what is arguably one of the most difficult residents in our building.

DECK USED:  STOLEN CHILD TAROT

#TarotForGrowthApril Challenge Prompt
Question: Current state of my relationship with my community.

Shadowland Tarot

Reading Summary:   Feeling a bit overwhelmed (Ten of Wands) but still standing strong (King of Wands) while I worry about transitions and changes (Six of Swords).

Take Away:  I think that everyone is worried about the current changes going on in society and where we are going from here. At the moment, like so many others, I am a bit overwhelmed by these worries and hit’s causing a bit of a struggle concerning action related to my passions and drive as I work to support others through this difficult time.

DECK USED:  SHADOWLAND TAROT

#DiscordTarotholicsApr2020 Challenge Prompt
Question: What is my greatest source of emotional strength?

New Liminal TarotReading Summary: When I’m feeling chaotic and defensive (Seven of Wands), taking some time to rest and reevaluate (Four of Swords) allows me to find balance once more (King of Swords).

Take Away:  These cards indicate that my emotional strength at this time lies in my ability to keep myself from picking at negative thoughts and being unkind to myself. A lot of times when I sense my own vulnerability, I will react by attacking, but the cards indicate that for true emotional strength, I need to see these moments as a time to reassess and find balance rather than allowing myself to fall into bad habits.

DECK USED:  NEW LIMINAL TAROT

#ConnectWithYourDeckChallenge by E Roebuck-Jones
Question: Am I confident in naming my boundaries?

Pastel Waite Smith Tarot

Reading Summary:  Absolutely (Strength).  Especially boundaries having to deal with emotional connections with others (King of Cups) and boundaries that deal with the  stability and security of hearth and home (King of Pentacles).

Take Away: My responsibilities are an extremely important part of my life and so it’s not surprising that it would come up that naming and standing by boundaries concerning my responsibilities to stability and security came up as somewhere I have a good deal of strength.  With my heart and soul very much belonging to you, it is also no surprise that I have absolutely no issue with setting boundaries where my emotions are concerned.

What is not included here is also interesting, as there is a lack of Swords and Wands, indicating that I have difficulty in enforcing mental boundaries and boundaries that have to do with my drive and ambitions.  This is also very fitting as it is where I am less apt to set boundaries for myself especially, but others as well. 

DECK USED:  PASTEL WAITE SMITH TAROT

#MidnightTarotChallenge Prompt
Question: How can I deepen my spiritual practice?

New Liminal Tarot

Reading Summary: If I want to move forward into a new connection (Ten of Swords), I need to take my time because trying to move too fast (Eight of Wands) is creating issues (Seven of Wands).

Take Away:  I recently had another reading with a similar question that indicated much the same thing as this.  I’m creating my own road blocks by overloading myself in different ways due to a feeling of uncertainty about how to move forward.  If I want to deepen my spiritual practice and that connection with my spirit guides, I’m going to need to let go of that trepidation and the subconscious methods of aversion that it’s creating.

DECK USED:  NEW LIMINAL TAROT

Finding the Calm

/ Twist the Leaf / 1 Comment

IMG_3496Today’s meditation was just over ten minutes long and focused upon finding calm in the midst of chaos, and how mindfulness and meditation can help you in finding that calm.

Mindfulness meditation is, at its very core, a way to train your brain.  People that let their thoughts and worries run away with them, or suffer from anxiety, or have a hard time getting their brain to just shut up…. mindfulness meditation is the exercise and training that can help in overcoming these issues, because it essentially trains you to find that calm and quiet place.

It isn’t about “doing it right” or being “good at it”.  Just the act of trying helps start that training process and gives your brain the exercise it needs to begin learning how to find that calm.  I didn’t understand this when I first started mindfulness meditations, but I get it now.

I’m far from “perfect” at being calm and silent and still and not allowing thoughts to intrude in my meditation…. but I am absolutely flawless at now *catching* myself when that happens and doing the mental “push up” of returning back to silent calm.  Sometimes, I have to do that mental “push up” countless times in those ten minutes or so that I meditate for.  Sometimes, I only have to do it once or twice.   But the fact is?  I’m still doing it… and that’s what counts.

Queen of Brine - Queen of Cups - Stolen Child TarotToday’s draw is the Queen of Brine (Queen of Cups) which is typically interpreted as a receptive alpha energy, personality, or person in the area of relationships and emotions.

What I see in the imagery of today’s card is the abundance of motion that swirls around the center figure.  So much life and so much chaos, and yet she is calm and steady amidst it all.

The message here is an echo of what I’ve written above concerning meditation and finding that inner calm.   Sometimes you get swept up in the chaos of life, but it’s important to take the time to pause and touch upon that inner source of calm.  It’s there, but sometimes we have to teach ourselves how to reach for it… and remember to then do so when we need it.

The message here in today’s card is a reminder to do my meditation and put my all into it instead of just going through the motions. Being dedicated to the task will strengthen the ability to more easily touch upon that calm when it is needed most.

DECK USED:  STOLEN CHILD TAROT

#TarotForGrowthApril Challenge Prompt
Question: Current state of body.

ETA Tarot

Reading Summary: I want to get back to that place that I was at before (Six of Pentacles), but I’m having trouble fitting the changes into my life (Two of Pentacles) and so I am feeling quite stagnant and stuck in place (King of Cups).

Take Away:  I want to get back to that place that I was at before the cancer and chemotherapy upended everything. To do this, though, requires weight training combined with a specific diet heavy in protein and carbs.  At this time, I’m having trouble fitting the type of exercise I would need (not to mention the amount of food I would need to consume) into my life.  Because of this, I am feeling quite stagnant and stuck in place where my body is concerned.

DECK USED:  EMERGING TORONTO ARTISTS (ETA) TAROT

#DiscordTarotholicsApr2020 Challenge Prompt
Question: What difficult truth about the human condition I am ignoring?

Shadowland TarotIntuitive Interpretation:  Most people crave love to the point that they’re willing to do damned near anything for it… but turn their back on it when it’s offered freely without them having to put in the effort to earn it or if it doesn’t live up to the ideal in their head.

Take Away:  I don’t actually have a whole lot of experience when it comes to matters of the heart and people trying to hand you their heart.  Just one, actually.   That said?  I do a good amount of observing of others and the read above from the cards seems pretty accurate.  I see truly amazing people offering their heart on their sleeves to others all the time and being turned away for what seem to be purely superficial reasons or simply because there was no challenge in getting that love. 

I see it, but I choose to ignore it. Because it is frustrating and flabbergasting to see it happen again and again, and yet those constantly turning their back on these offers complain about being alone and unloved. It is a pattern that becomes disheartening if observed and acknowledged too often.

DECK USED:  SHADOWLAND TAROT

#ConnectWithYourDeckChallenge by E Roebuck-Jones
Question: What takes my confidence away?

Universal Celtic Tarot

Reading Summary: When I find myself on uncertain footing stability wise and am not giving myself enough self care to keep things balanced.

Take Away:  Both the Ace and the Page are cards that indicating a beginning.  During these times when a new start is before me, there’s a feeling of uncertainty and newness that can set me off kilter, especially if that uncertainty and newness is in the area of my financial security and home stability.  The cards indicate that at those times, a little self nurturing can go a long way in bolstering my self confidence, but even then, the struggle is still present, just concealed a bit by a blanket of warmth.

DECK USED:  UNIVERSAL CELTIC TAROT

#MidnightTarotChallenge Prompt
Question: What do I need to bring into my life to nourish my growth?

IMG_3507

Reading Summary:  Be less miserly (Four of Pentacles) with my praise (Six of Wands) and foster good feels (Ace of Cups).

Take Away:  By finding ways to connect with others and foster their growth, I in turn foster my own growth.    I have noticed this lately in my interaction with others.  I feel a bit less awkward in interacting with others, and even seem to catch humor and jokes more often than I have in the past. This is emotional and social growth for me, which is pretty impressive in my opinion… especially concerning the amount of social awkwardness that I have spent the majority of my life experiencing.

DECK USED:  SHADOWLAND TAROT