Morning Bonus Read – Changing Seasons

Changing Seasons Spread - Hoping Soul Lenormand

Card to represent this new season of my life.

Heart – A thawing and rising of warmth as the ice that the depression has encased your emotions within begins to melt and ease.  Contentment and feelings of love and warmth return as the depression is being left behind. The new season that is rising up at this time in your life is one of return… of life and love and emotion that was once shut down is now being given the freedom to grow and thrive again as you begin to find the light you’ve been striving for.

How will I change in this new season of my life?

Clover – Good stuff lies ahead with a return of a more optimistic outlook and the ability to get in touch with and feel happiness once more.  The closer you get to the edge of that pit of depression and pulling yourself out of it, the better you will feel.

Something important I will learn.

Cross – There is reinforcement in the journey, and in the familiarity of the slippery slope and the climb back out. In repeating this journey it is not something new that is learned, but rather an assurance that the depression is indeed temporary and will be again in the future when it eventually returns as it has in the past.

Something I need to embrace.

Broom – Finding balance again will not be easy.  The climb out of the pit is hard, and there’s a lot of struggle involved.  It’s important to accept that there will be slippery spots in the climb, places where your hand or foot might slip.  Remember that the pain is a part of the journey and keep your ass moving upward.

A challenge I will face this season.

Scythe – When to let go. Too often you spend too much time fighting the good fight when the battle is already over.  Instead of being so rigid, you will have the opportunity in this season of your life to let go more easily, to let things flow more smoothly, and accept change without the resistance and struggle you habitually put forth at these times.

A lesson I must learn from this challenge.

Cloud – To live with uncertainty rather than fight against it. The unknown can be terrifying, or it can simply be something you’ve yet to discover.  In letting go of the fight against change, you will learn to better accept the unknown and not let it give rise to your anxiety.

How this challenge will make me a better person.

Lily – You will find yourself feeling calmer and more peaceful, and able to handle changes in a more mature and measured way. Remember that if you don’t take the lesson and learn from it, you don’t end up with the boon at the end when you grow from the experience.  Growth is very much the boon of this particular lesson.

DECK USED:  HOPING SOUL LENORMAND

Morning Bonus Read – The Soul’s Spread

The Soul's Spread - Rusted Lenormand

1. What I should Silence of my Past?

Cross – The pain and emotional burdens of what has been placed upon me by others.  I bear many negative emotions and an intense amount of negative inner narrative that was birthed out of my past.  It’s time to begin more actively working on silencing those inner narratives and emotions spawned within my formative years.

2. What I should Silence of my Environment?

Lily – Again we are lead to themes of family legacy and those that can influence us from our past.  In my current environment the only person that currently fits this particular card is my mother and my aunt.  Both are quite toxic and the advice of the lily in this position is that I need to take what they say (to me and about me) with calm wisdom and a grain of salt.

3. What Fear I should Silence?

Broom – Being beaten down and “swept under the rug”. The Broom is also the Whip and speaks of self flagellation and punishment (among other things).  The fear here is about my inner voice that speaks of me being nothing ending up being true and a self fulfilling prophecy where it goes from a whisper in my mind to something others actually think and feel.  It is an irrational fear.

4. What Fear I should Listen To?

Letter –  Bad news is coming. My intuition has been screaming at me all week.  In fact, I’ve even changed some of my normal schedule to adjust to avoid a few things that I was then hoping might ease those feeling. It’s coming, and I need to be prepared for it.  

5. What in my Environment I should Listen To?

Anchor – As this bad news mentioned above approaches (and eventually arrives) I need to make sure I am focusing upon my environment and keeping things balanced and stable through the disruption. Don’t allow everything to fall apart due to panic or uncertainty, but instead ground yourself and stay that way.

6. What I should Listen To from my Past?

Ship – Keep in mind how I have handled difficulties in the past in my travels up north to the post office. The issues coming feel like they are coming from that direction and the advice here is to pull on my experience with past encounters and experiences to help me through any issues I run across this time around.

7. My Soul’s Song (Inner Drive)?

Bouquet – Remember what lies beyond this week.  Vacation is coming.  Time off is coming.  This is good news and well needed, and will give you the opportunity to relax and enjoy yourself for a bit.  Allow thoughts of this to lighten your heart and give you something to look forward to on the other side of this week’s stresses and turmoil.

DECK USED:  RUSTED LENORMAND

Morning Bonus Read – Mercury Retrograde

Under the Roses Lenormand - Mercury Rx Tarot Spread

What is the main theme of this Mercury Retrograde for me?

Clouds – This was actually the card I expected to hop out, as it is very clear that the theme of this Mercury Rx for me is all about the current major depressive episode I am going through from its descent to (we can hope) the beginning of climbing back out again.  I don’t have the expectation that I will be able to pull out of it so quickly, but this card gives me hope that my ascent might begin around the same time as the Mercury Rx comes to an end (around February 21st or there about, if I’m not mistaken).

How am I asked to honor my feelings and current Rx vibes?

Whip – It is important to remember that the self flagellation and dark inner narratives in your head are dangerous.  Respect their power and work on coming out on top by acknowledging their existence.  It is only through awareness that you can overcome their influences.  Stay focused on where you want to go and determined to make your way there as you move through the mire of your depression and you will eventually come out the victor over these challenges.

What am I asked to reflect on throughout Mercury Retrograde?

Crossroads – Now is the time to reflect on your choices.  Where do you want to go from here and how do you want to get there?  You have choices, even now in the middle of your depression.  Are you going to focus on doing the healthy things that will help you to climb out of the pit more quickly? Or sink into the mire and allow it to cradle you and eat away at your insides while it pretends to be comforting you?  You need to keep these things in mind as you go through this struggle so that you can recover as smoothly and easily as possible once the clouded darkness begins to ease its grip.

DECK USED:  UNDER THE ROSES LENORMAND

Morning Bonus Read – Monthly Key Spread

1889 Lenormand - Monthly Key Spread

Key to Your Heart: What will Guide you to make decisions that are aligned with your heart and your truths this month?

Book – Make sure that you know all the facts before making any important decisions this month.  With you currently in the middle of an MDE, it’s important that you look to stable and informative outside sources to ensure you are seeing the full picture and not just that one view through the grimy glass that your depression affords you.

Anchor: What will ground you in the face of anxiety, stress, overwhelm, and existential dread in general?

Clouds – Remember that this is temporary.  You are well and deeply sunken into the pit of depression and it is causing a good deal of confusion but you’re doing well at keeping the overwhelm in hand. Remember that this is familiar to you.  It’s something you’ve gone through before, and something that you will get through this time as well.  The depression may be heavy, but it’s temporary.

Star Wand: What will accelerate your magic, creativity, and manifestation powers?

Ship – Focus on the things you have invested in and in fostering their continued good health.  Don’t worry about growth, that will take care of itself.  Just keep everything afloat and let the rest go for right now.  If it’s still afloat at the end of the depression, you can then work on pushing things forward and encouraging their growth.

Blessings from the Stars: The Universe has got your back – how will you be supported this month?

Bouquet – The universe is rooting for you and pushing you to find what joy you can, however you can find it.  Even little joys will help brighten up the darkness around you, so allow them in and do your best to take pleasure in them.

One Trick Up Your Sleeve: A life saving idea or inspiration for any unexpected challenge or difficult moments?

Anchor – Don’t forget that you have spent a long time setting yourself up for the security and stability that you now have in your life.  Things feel like they are out of control at the moment, but this is an illusion created by your mental instability, and it will pass.  The true stability  you  have created in your life is still there, and will be there waiting for you when you begin to find your way out of the darkness.

Emergence Pt 1: What is emerging within you / within your reality right now?

Man – It’s okay to focus on yourself right now. It’s okay to be selfish right now. It’s okay to need to put yourself first for now.  It’s needed.  Do it.

Emergence Pt 2: What are you expanding towards?

Child – You are at the bottom of the pit.  Seek out the light and the fresh air. Don’t wallow but keep reaching for the new breath and fresh openness  that is waiting for you on the other side of the darkness.

DECK USED:  1889 LENORMAND ORACLE

Morning Bonus Read – Peaceful Tree

Japanese Pattern Lenormand

Leaves: What feeds my soul?

Clouds – Challenges and struggle.  This is an odd card to see in the “feeds your soul” position until you consider the fact that it is only through challenges that we grow.  The things that create confusion and complications in life are the same things that facilitate our growth. Without them, life is stagnant and so are we.  This card is not just an answer to what feeds the soul, but a reminder to be grateful for each and every experience we have… even those that are confusing, challenging, or filled with hurdles and complications.

Branches: What direction do I need to grow?

Woman – This card recently came up in a different reading for a very similar question.  It is an indication that you need to tap into your softer side.  That sacred feminine side that everyone has within them that fosters energies of nurturing and warmth.  You spend too much time poking and prodding and shoving at yourself, pushing yourself to your limits and beyond without any mercy or kindness.  It’s time to grow in a direction that fosters a more supportive and nurturing energy in how you treat yourself as well as how you talk to yourself.

Trunk: What supports my well-being?

Clover – Over the past year you have been working really hard on injecting more positivity, optimism, and happiness into your life.  You’ve discovered that these efforts are not in vain, but assist in finding balance that allows you to continue to push toward your goals, but in far more healthy ways.  It’s important to continue this practice.  These influences created in small ways have a large impact over time, and are especially important when you are feeling your lowest and worst as they can help lift you up out of the darkness.

Roots: What anchors me in place?

Scythe – Cold hard logic. While you explore your emotions and they feel as if they are always out of control, always sliding this way and that, and always feeling just slightly outside of your understanding… cold hard logic is the anchor in the storm.  Just remember that you do not have to cut your emotions off or end your growth to use this logic to its fullest potential when an anchor is needed.

DECK USED:  JAPANESE PATTERN LENORMAND

Morning Bonus Read – Facing Reality

In a post earlier this week, I briefly mentioned “spiritual bypassing” in the reading. I thought that today I’d do a spread on that topic.

Spiritual Bypassing is defined as a “tendency to use spiritual ideas and practices to sidestep or avoid facing unresolved emotional issues, psychological wounds, and unfinished developmental tasks.

Lua Lenormand - Facing Reality Tarot Spread

An aspect of reality that I’m avoiding.

Bear – Ugh… my finances. I mean it’s a good time to drop the ball, honestly, because I’m in the wake of the holiday rush, which means I have a bit of a cushion from any negative repercussions that not obsessing over my finances as usually could cause.  But still. It’s definitely an aspect of reality that I’ve been sticking my head in the sand about lately.

Why it’s important for me to stop avoiding this.

Ring – Because it’s important not to fall behind on my commitments.  I have a mortgage to keep up on and responsibilities to deal with that require me to stay on top of my finances and not let them go off on their own little way for too long without a guiding hand to keep them on track.

How I can accept this truth that I’ve been avoiding.

Book – Open up your bank website, log in, and do a little research.  Look into what’s going on and it will help you in getting your ass back into the groove it needs to be in.  Ignoring those various accounts is not going to do any good for you or your life.  Better to open your eyes and stay informed.

A way that this ties into my own spiritual bypassing.

Dog – You’re getting too comfortable.  You’re allowing your spiritual practices and methods to wrap you up in comfort and fool you into thinking “everything is okay”, instead of ensuring for yourself that all’s well and good.

A pattern of behavior I fall into during stress.

Anchor – See above in the previous answer. I pretend everything is grounded and good even when it’s not. I make others believe that all’s well when I’m actually struggling beneath the surface.

How I can become a better version of myself.

Lady – Tap into my softer side and allow it to show more often.  This card is about the sacred feminine energy that we all have within us, and allowing it to come out and be a part of the day to day rather than “sucking it up” and, in my father’s words, pushing myself to “be a man”.  Yuck

DECK USED:  LUA LENORMAD