Brain Shuffle

Today’s meditation was just over ten minutes long, and I did something a little different today (which I’m surprised my phone cooperated with me and it worked).  Essentially I overlaid my harp meditation with the incremental chimes over-top the guided meditation.  So I got both the guide’s voice doing her guided meditation thing, and the harp in the background, and the occasional charms that tell me when to change positions in my stretch.   It sounds complicated, but it was really great and definitely something I’ll be doing again.

Cosmos Tarot and OracleToday’s draw is the Page of Air (Page of Swords) which is traditionally interpreted as a receptive omega energy, personality, or person in the area of one’s thoughts, intellect, logic, and the realm of communication.

What stood out to me the strongest in the imagery of this card today was the swirling of the fish around the central figure.   This swirling reminds me of the confusion that I sometimes go through when my brain has one of it’s “moments”.

This got me to thinking about why sometimes I’ll get in the habit of doing something (like messaging you as soon as I get home from work, for instance) and I’ll do that for a while and then suddenly I just stop. I know this is something that confuses you when it has something to do with how I interact with you specifically. But I want you to know that it’s not just you, and in truth?  I don’t even realize when it happens.  It’s sort of as if my brain goes through some sort of cyclical reshuffling on a periodic basis. At these times, some small things get lost in the shuffle, and then when things re-shuffle again (or you remind me)… they resurface.

I don’t know if this is natural and something that everyone goes through… or if it’s part of the results of the head injury that I experienced when I was younger that still at times screws with my memory. Either way, the fish in today’s card brought this to mind, and I think that the message here isn’t so much a “moral of the story” message as it is an encouragement for me to think about this in general and let it become something I’m more conscious of as a whole, even if I don’t realize it’s happening in the moment.

DECK USED:  COSMOS TAROT AND ORACLE

#TarotForGrowthJuly Challenge Prompt
Topic: 
I’m struggling to find my purpose.
Question
:  How are fear and shame playing into my refusal to acknowledge my purpose?

Dixit Cards v4 Origins Expansion Pack

Reading Summary: There is a continuation of color in these cards that indicates a building from one card to the next.  In the first card, you have a moose among men and he swings with them without fear of condemnation or reprisal… shameless.   In the center card, the knight stands in the mouth of the monster without fear or either falling or being eaten alive… fearless.  In the last card, the owl eats fruit from its own brain tree, indicating self sufficiency.

Take Away:  I am shameless and fearless in this area. I am centered in my purpose and know my path well as it is the path I chose for myself.

This has always been the case for me, and I honestly have no idea where the confidence to walk my own path came from.  It’s just always been there.  I know what I like and no amount of fear or shame can sway me from it.  I know what’s right for me, whether that’s something I like or some moral dilemma, or the steps taken along my spiritual path or my life path.

I honestly have struggled with the Tarot for Growth questions for the past few days, because struggling to find my purpose is just not something that I personally have an issue with, so the questions that focus upon that issue are really not something I relate well to.

DECK USED:  DIXIT CARDS v4 ORIGINS EXPANSION PACK

#DiscordTarotholicsJul2020 Challenge Prompt
Question
:  What do I need to focus on for self-care for this upcoming full moon?

Numinous TarotReading Summary:  Take some time to appreciate all that you’ve accomplished (Ten of Tomes), with extra emphasis placed upon the fact that you have accomplished these things by being the capable and resourceful individual that you are (The Magician).  Use this knowledge to push back against (Explorer of Bells) that inner critic that keeps trying to beat you into submission lately (Three of Bells).

Take Away:  My inner critic is a son of a bitch.  It’s no secret that this is something that I struggle with a lot. It works hard to convince me that nothing I do is ever good enough or ever enough at all. It pushes me forward, driving me to always give my all to every little thing… and the thing is?  It’s not just exhausting, but it’s impossible to give your all to every little thing.  With this upcoming full moon, the cards remind me to not give that inner critic credence, but instead look at all that I have done and how capable these accomplishments prove that I am… no matter what that inner critic says to the contrary.

DECK USED:  NUMINOUS TAROT

#OwlandBonesJuly Challenge by Owl and Bones Tarot
Topic:
  stop // use caution // go

Women of Science Tarot

Stop – Three of Astro – Don’t allow your thoughts to pick apart at your inner confidence. It’s important to take what that inner critic says with a grain of salt.

Use Caution – Three of Macro and Justice – Pay attention to what tasks you are farming out to others.  You have exacting standards, and you don’t want to hand out tasks to others that will lower the quality of the end results.

Go – Ten of Astro – As a previous reading I did earlier in the week stated, it’s time to move forward with the transition and growth that I’m going through.  I’ve spent time gathering wool and exploring, but I can’t stay still forever.  It’s time to consciously work on letting go of the old and stepping into the new.

DECK USED:  WOMEN OF SCIENCE TAROT

Self Care Saturday (on Sunday)

SCS

As I mentioned before, these readings are (not usually) bearing in on any one thing or event in my life, as the question used is asking for a more general outlook. This is a self care exercise, and are not meant as a predictive reading.

The question is… What do I need to focus on in the week ahead?

Earth Four of Candles & The Chariot – If I want to meet my physical and monetary goals, it will require seizing the reigns and a higher level of control in the week ahead.

Air The Magician – I have what I need, including the tools and knowledge necessary to succeed in this week’s goals if I make a point of applying these tools and knowledge with focus.

Water Four of Vials – Its time for some down time.  Don’t wait until you are feeling overwhelmed to take a break.

Fire Two of Bells – This card ties into the one previous.  If I’m not caring for my  needs and making good choices for my self care, I will end up feeling scattered and “flaky”.

Moving Away From – Creativity and manifestation of new ideas into reality. Projective nurturing.

Heading Toward – Demands to perform under unpleasant conditions.

Moral of the Story – I am being warned of potential burnout.  Take heed and begin preventative measures.

Decks Used: Numinous Tarot, Dixit Quest Expansion Pack #2

 

Self Care Saturday (on Sunday)

SCS

Week four of accountability.  And… I think this is working out for me really well.  Even though I am tempted to take the picture and set aside my journal for later, because I know I need to make this post on the day after my Self Care Saturday, I have more discipline to get it done in my journal (and apparently, to catch up on other entries as well such as Thursday’s full moon entry).

As I mentioned before, these readings are (not usually) bearing in on any one thing or event in my life, as the question used is asking for a more general outlook. This is a self care exercise, and are not meant as a predictive reading.

I did end up switching out the oracle, as I’d said last week I was planning to do.  I chose the Dixit cards Quest expansion pack for the oracle to go with the Numinous Tarot, and I feel it is a really good fit.

The question is… What do I need to focus on in the week ahead?

BodyExplorer of Vials – It is important to bring into focus the issue of eating your feelings and take an active role in making healthy choices both emotionally and physically in order to stay healthy.

MindAce of Vials – This is about our new play and allowing it to inspire, as well as the closeness and bond created as we explore this new idea.

EmotionsThe Visionary & Seven of Bells – Seek truth and lift the veil on blurry confusion by connecting more deeply within my spiritual practice.  Use what I know to seek out clarity and support my own truths.

Inner SparkThe Moon – This card plays back to that of the two above, with the addition of intuition. Everything is not as clear as it could be… everything is not as it seems.  Be certain to perceive from a place of knowledge blended with intuition to find the path through to clarity.

Moving Away From – Viewing things from an external perspective.  Instead seek inner knowing and inner truth.

Heading Towards – Hidden truths.  PAY ATTENTION!! That which is hidden walks right beside you.  Awareness breeds control.

Decks Used: Numinous Tarot, Dixit Quest Expansion Pack #2

 

A Moment of Realization with the Tarot

basic-elements-1663243

I’m pretty well seated in how I both see and use the tarot, and comfortable in that.   But, just recently I came to a new realization about how I see the tarot and its suits.

Up until just the last few days, I had always thought that I saw the suits as “cups, pentacles, wands, and swords”, regardless of the fact that those names don’t always just “roll off the tongue” for me (so to speak).

Then, I got the Numinous Tarot in the mail and it showed me that this isn’t how I view the suits at all, which is a little odd since I’ve had other decks that rename the suits, but it really stuck out to me with this one.

In the Numinous Tarot, the suits are renamed as vials, tomes, candles, and bells.  And, when trying to sort this out?   My mind never even -went- to the whole “cups, pentacles, wands, and swords” thing, but instead went immediately to the elements.

Yes, all along I’ve known and been intimately aware with the correlations between the suits and the elements.  Cups = Water, Pentacles = Earth, Wands = Fire, Swords = Air…. and yet, never before has it stuck out to me how -much- I see the suits not as their names at all, but the elements themselves and the qualities those elements represent.

I’d guess that I’ve been pairing the suit names to the elements so long that, for the most part, they became synonymous with each other.  And yet, clearly, they are not as when push comes to shove?  It’s not to the suit names I relate, but the elements they (for me) represent.