You’ve Got This

IMG_8233Today’s meditation was just under thirteen minutes long and was another guided meditation with interval timer for my piriformis stretches.  I’ve also begun adding in some forearm flexor stretches for my right arm, as the muscles have started to seize up from so many hours using the pliers and the repetitive action of the wirework.

The topic of today’s guided meditation was about how to work through difficult emotions such as loneliness, depression, sadness, etc. The key technique that is touched on in this meditation is in remembering that emotions and feelings are temporary. This time of year there’s a lot of people feeling alone, especially considering the pandemic and the restrictions in place around the world right now.  Feeling lonely or down is a common reaction to this.  They key is to remember it’s not forever, even when it feels like it’s forever.  It’s not.

Keymaster Tarot - The MagicianToday’s draw is the Magician, which is traditionally a representation of being in possession of all of the skills, abilities, and tools necessary to reach one’s goals and accomplish one’s ends.  It’s about being capable and skilled, resourceful and gifted with what is needed to get the job done.

Like yesterday,  there are colors and items in the imagery that stand out to me, but in this case it is more of an aesthetic appeal, as the message that came from the card when it first landed on the table was clear and succinct.

You’ve got this.

It’s the last two days of the holiday rush.

You’ve got this.

DECK USED:  KEYMASTER TAROT

#DiscordTarotolicsDec2020 Challenge Prompt
Topic
: Do Spread #2
Question: How can I best ensure that I get the rest and recovery I need in the week ahead?

Traditional Japanese TarotReading Summary: The colors in the first two cards between the aquas and the greens connect the two cards together.  These two, connected as they are, recommend that new ideas need time to percolate.  Write them down in order to keep track of what needs done, and formulate a plan with Gideon to support you on sticking to it.

The shades of green in the Nine of Pentacles also holds a connection to the Ace of Swords. This is a reminder that now that the end of the holiday rush is at its end, it’s time to turn the mind in a new direction and take time for gratitude, and to acknowledgment of your accomplishments.

Take Away: As silly as it feels to me to need someone to sort of… “police” my activities in order to assure that I get the rest I need this week to recover from the god-awful chaos and exhaustion of the holiday rush… I also know that I’m not able to fully step away without that watchful (and somewhat constant) reminder that I’m not supposed to be working.  There are things to get done and I struggle with not doing them as they pop into my head, worried they won’t get done otherwise.  I need to make sure I’m writing these things down and making a list I can then work at checking things off on later after I’ve had a few days to recover.

DECK USED:  JAPANESE TRADITIONAL TAROT

Mystic Star December Challenge Prompt
Question
: What is the best way to share my gifts with those around me?

Tarot of Light and Shadow

Reading Summary: Use what you’ve learned (Six of Cups) to inspire and motivate others (Queen of Wands). And allow them to help you (Three of Serpents) when you need help to defeat your own demons and come out on top (Five of Swords).

Take Away:  This is about making sure that I respect the give-and-take that happens between myself and others.  I always try to give and help, teach and offer… but struggle with taking help in turn.   The cards here indicate that I am capable of inspiring others even while I allow others to help me with what I need help with.  They are not mutually exclusive.

DECK USED:  TAROT OF LIGHT AND SHADOW

Don’t Stop Yet

IMG_8210Today’s meditation was just under thirteen minutes long and was another of the guided meditations from the Calm app accompanied by an interval timer for my piriformis stretching. 

The topic of today’s meditation was about choosing your battles.

The thing is, everyone has those times when something sticks “under their craw” and they jump forward into an argument either in defense of something they believe in, or maybe just because they don’t like how something was said or who said it.  But if we spend our lives in that space where we’re always ready to jump on every little thing, it diminishes the joy we feel in the day to day.

This is where it’s important to choose your battles wisely.  Not just because you want to win or be in the right, but also because you don’t want strife and conflict to overtake the joys in your life.

Green Witch Tarot - The Battle WagonToday’s draw is the Chariot (which in this deck is known as The Battle Wagon), which is traditionally a representation of willpower leaning into action.  It is about motivation, progress, and success through determination.

The horses really stood out to me in this card today, but I think it’s more because they’re pretty than anything, because the message that came through when the card first hit the table was, “No rest for you today. Get back on the wagon.”

This is fitting, and was actually really good advice. I had a really nice and relaxing Friday with Gideon and I really didn’t feel like going back to work for these last three days of the holiday rush.  And yet… if I had not taken that advice from the Battle Wagon card this morning?  I’d be up until three or four in the morning tonight trying to finish the work that landed in my lap today.

Because I did listen?  I get to actually get some sleep tonight. That’s a win in my book.

DECK USED:  GREEN WITCH TAROT

LionHart’s 20/21 Tarot Challenge Prompt
Topic
: In what way can I use 2020 as an inspiration for 2021?

Inkromancy Tarot

Reading Summary: Continue with the changes that were started in 2020 (Death). Keep your eye on the prize even though the progress is slow going (Knight of Pentacles), and don’t judge yourself harshly for the extra time it takes (Judgement).

Take Away:  I need to remember that I’m not on a deadline where it comes to the emotional growth I’m working through and the changes I’m working on making concerning my work balance and personal care priorities.  This isn’t a race and there’s no finish line, which means it takes as long as it takes and there’s no such thing as “lagging behind”.  I’m so used to pushing myself so hard on every project and endeavor that I sometimes forget that this isn’t like making it through a holiday rush or working on a project with a deadline in mind. Stop worrying so much about how long it’s taking… or how long it takes… or whatever speed I am moving along that path.

DECK USED:  INKROMANCY TAROT

#DiscordTarotolicsDec2020 Challenge Prompt
Question
: Where do I find the most joy in life?

Bonestone & Earthflesh TarotLook at that Empress and Sun card.  Talk about artwork flow in a reading!

I find the most joy in life in my connection with the earth and celebrating that connection through enjoying time in the presence of the earth and her generosity.  When I connect with the earth through my time in the outdoors, I am given energy and an inner healing that I can’t find anywhere else, which is not just healing but also uplifting.

There is also an outlier here in the Ten of Wands which is an indication of a sort of self destructive joy I find in being busy.  This particular joy has to do with feeling like I’m accomplishing things… even if in doing so it grinds me into the ground.

DECK USED:  BONESTONE & EARTHFLESH TAROT

What Are You Building On?

IMG_8195Today’s meditation was just under thirteen minutes long and was a guided meditation with interval timer for piriformis stretches.

The topic of today’s guided meditation was about the Danish/Norwegian concept of Hygge, which essentially is a word that indicates a mood of coziness and comfortable conviviality with feelings of wellness and contentment… In both Danish and Norwegian, hygge refers to “a form of everyday togetherness”, “a pleasant and highly valued everyday experience of safety, equality, personal wholeness and a spontaneous social flow”. (Thank you Wikipedia)

The meditation went over how important this concept is to our well-being and how meditation helps in finding a way to slow down and sink into the hygge concept more easily with less resistance to those moments when we can find ourselves enjoying the moment and the world around us without the strain and stress pounding on our mental or physical doors.

Faeles Arcanae - Nine of CupsToday’s draw is the Nine of Cups, which is traditionally a representation of a sense of contentment and satisfaction.  This isn’t about the work or what has been earned, but rather about the feelings involved with those things.

What stood out to me the strongest in the imagery for this card is that the cat is sitting on a rug that looks like it’s either a representation of the sun or a sunflower.  Either way, the meaning there is very similar in that there is a radiant warmth and joy in the foundation of those feelings of contentment and satisfaction.

The message here today is about staying focused on the stuff that makes you happy, rather than allowing things that don’t to tug at your attention.  Everyone, even those most fortunate, have things in life that make them unhappy, but instead of focusing on them… make sure you are building your good feelings on a foundation of positivity rather than a bedrock of quicksand.

DECK USED:  FAELES ARCANAE TAROT

LionHart’s 20/21 Tarot Challenge Prompt
Topic
: What should I keep in mind in preparation for 2021?

Heaven & Earth Tarot

Reading Summary: Good and healthy decisions (The Lovers) will require seeking out a new outlook, thought patterns, and methods (Ace of Swords) in order to ensure victory (Six of Wands).

Take Away:  It’s time to set behind me the old habits and work-a-holic attitudes of my past now that the holiday rush is over, and re-focus on the new goals and perspectives I was fostering throughout most of the last year.  Self care and finding a healthy balance between my own needs and my work, as well as exploring that emotional growth and fostering it to continue, now need to come back into focus as I move forward into 2021.  Don’t allow the bad habits and slippage the holiday rush caused to carry forward into the new year.

DECK USED:  HEAVEN & EARTH TAROT

#DiscordTarotolicsDec2020 Challenge Prompt
Question
: How can I better connect with my intuition and decrease self-doubt?

Broken Isn't Bad TarotReading Summary: Kill (Ten of Swords) the bitch in your head (Queen of Swords Rx) that makes you so unhappy (Three of Swords)… and look forward into making healthy choices for yourself instead (The Lovers).

Take Away: When you are tortured by those negative voices and being pulled down into the quicksand of depression and bad decisions, your intuition’s voice becomes more faint and your confidence tanks. 

In order to keep yourself on top of that mound of quicksand, you need to make healthy choices and not listen to that inner voice that likes to rise up when you’re feeling down or vulnerable. Finding ways to “kill the bitch” in your head or otherwise weaken that voice until it has much less power will assist you in moving forward in more healthy ways.

DECK USED:  BROKEN ISN’T BAD TAROT

Don’t Get Up Just Yet

Today’s meditation was supposed to be ten minutes long, but I dozed off and slept through it (and another 30 minutes on top of that).  I’ve got the stomach flu and I think my body just said that sleep was more important.  I’ll try again at the end of the day when I lie down to go to bed.  Then if I fall asleep on accident it’ll be okay.

Broken Isn't Bad Tarot - Ten of SwordsToday’s draw is the Ten of Swords, which is traditionally about painful endings and finding yourself at the end of a difficult journey with lots of struggle and strife.  It can also be a representation of loss, betrayal, or coming out at the end of something feeling crippled in some way.

Honestly? This is such an appropriate card, considering how I’m feeling today. I woke up with an upset stomach and severely painful back today, and even after an Imodium, followed later on after the Imodium started working by dry toast and an ibuprofen?  I have still felt really rough throughout the day and it was extremely hard to focus on work.

The message in today’s card is in her position upon the ground, as she looks more in repose than as if she’s been struck down.  Today’s card is a reminder to take care of myself and allow myself the rest I need to feel better.

You will be happy to know that I did give myself some rest this morning while waiting for the Imodium to work.  I laid down on the bed and had a tel-appointment with my shrink (that I almost forgot that I had today) and I’ve been careful to make sure I eat enough (of only very gentle foods) to keep my blood sugars level even during the worst of the stomach upset.

DECK USED:  BROKEN ISN’T BAD TAROT

#DiscordTarotolicsDec2020 Challenge Prompt
Philosophical Question
: Should people care more about doing the right thing, or doing things right?

Lost Hollow TarotReading Summary: Note the Four of Pentacles on its side.

The Adjustment card with the Eight of Wands indicates that one should go swiftly towards doing the right thing.  Adjustment/Justice is about cause and effect and “the law” (whether that be the laws of nature or the laws of man).  The Eight of Wands is about swift action.   These cards indicate that it is important to not just do the right thing, but to do so without hesitation.

The Four of Pentacles on its side is what blocks us from this swift action of doing the right thing.  The concept of “doing things right” is a concept of control.  It’s not about the rule of law (natural or otherwise) but about subjective opinion and control over one’s environment and how things are done.  This is not dominant but rather on its side… a blockage.  A problem.

Take Away:  These cards clearly state that people should care more about doing the right thing than they should about “doing things right”.   It is our ego that gets in the way from doing the right thing… and our ego that makes us focus on “doing things right”. 

DECK USED:  LOST HOLLOW TAROT

Finding Motivation thru Inspiration

IMG_8067Today’s meditation was just over twelve minutes long, and was another of the guided meditations (from the Calm app, which is where I get the little graphics pertaining to those guided meditations btw) combined with an interval timer for my piriformis stretches.

The topic of today’s guided meditation was about dealing with our personal inner dialogues and the habit of cruelty and lack of understanding that we direct inward towards ourselves rather than treating ourselves with the same kindness and understanding that we give to others.

This is something that I personally struggle with, and I have been making a concerted effort this year to be kinder to myself and use positivity and optimism to help lift my inner dialogue out of the cruel and savage and into a gentler space.  That said, it is still a struggle after all this time, and I know that part of that is my struggle to let go of the past… and the voices of my past.

Heaven & Earth Tarot - Queen of WandsToday’s draw is is the Queen of Wands, which is traditionally a representation of a receptive alpha energy, personality, or person in the area of one’s enthusiasm and drive, passions, willpower, determination, and inner spark.

I really like this deck… a lot.  The imagery is just so… f’ing gorgeous. Every card.  Even with the Jesus looking guy as the Magician card. (It very well may be a depiction of Jesus, as I haven’t read the guide book for this deck yet. Even if not? It sure as hell looks like the classic depictions of Jesus.)

Okay, so my fascination with the artwork aside, what really stood out to me today in this card was the flames at the queen’s feet, and the spread wings above her throne.

To me the flames feel like that fire within that figuratively “lights a fire under your ass” to get you moving. In the Queen, this translates to me as someone or something that lights that fire and encourages its burn.  The wings further this impression for me, as they speak about giving lift.  Encouragement.  Providing what is needed to inspire.  That energy, personality, or person being the “wind beneath” those wings, so to speak.

The message here is about inspiration.  it’s about finding inspiration and fostering it within that inner spark, feeding the fire and using it to keep moving forward.  Find strength and determination and willpower within the fanning of the flames, and use theses qualities to keep going despite the roadblocks and hurdles.

DECK USED:  HEAVEN & EARTH TAROT

#DiscordTarotolicsDec2020 Challenge Prompt
Topic
: Draw a random card and use it to describe a quality about yourself that you love.

Hans Zatzka Dreamland Tarot - StrengthStrength – Deep within me beneath the layers of defense and determination. vulnerability and deflection… there is a core of strength.  This strength is what has allowed me to survive so much and continue on, to allow myself to be open and receptive to others even through the pain of what has happened in my past.  The  assaults, the cancer, the rape, the accidents, the abuse, and the betrayals.  All of it could have closed me down, closed me off, made me bitter, made me hard and hateful.  They could have broken me and made me a victim… or in many cases, could have (or almost did) kill me.

And yet I survive.  I am not a victim.  I am not broken.  I am not bitter or hateful. I choose to not allow these things from my past to destroy the person that I am, the person I want to be, and the person I wish to become.

Side note:  This deck’s cardstock is horrendous. It’s essentially unsealed textured printer paper with inkjet printing. I have plans to reproduce this deck for my own use at some point, with better cardstock (and no typos).

DECK USED:  HANS ZATZKA DREAMLAND TAROT

Get Moving

IMG_8057Today’s meditation was just under ten minutes long and was a guided meditation with interval timer for my piriformis stretching.

The topic of the guided part of the meditation was about the benefits of meditating, especially when life has become chaotic and hectic.  How using meditation during these times can help in establishing a quiet calm within the chaos that swirls around you.

This is the reason I am trying especially hard during this month to make sure that I do not skip my meditations.  I might have to skip a good number of my self care practices during this month… but not that one.  Not when the world is in chaos due do the holiday rush.  It’s during this time of year that I need my meditation the most.

Neo Tarot Shadow Edition - Eight of WandsToday’s draw is the Eight of Wands, which is traditionally a representation of fast paced, action oriented energy.  It can also represent alignment and fast moving changes.

I honestly don’t have anything that stood out to me in this card today, and the reason for this is that when the card hit the table, I immediately heard words in my mind.   This type of response to the card happens now and then, and is like a whisper in the ear that is coming from the area of my ear but behind the eardrum instead of from an external source.

What this card said today is “move your ass”.   This was very appropriate considering that I had far more to get done today than I had hours in the day, and even while rushing full speed from hour to hour, I didn’t manage to get everything done until after 4:30am.

DECK USED:  NEO TAROT SHADOW EDITION

#DiscordTarotolicsDec2020 Challenge Prompt
Question
: Where should I direct my focus this week to be more understanding?

The Keymaster TarotReading Summary: Avoid focusing on your disappointments (Three of Clubs Rx) and instead lean into (Eight of Hearts) how you are feeling about (Jack of Hearts) the surprise attack of fortune (Jack of Diamonds Rx).    Note how the Jack of Hearts and the Jack of Diamonds are facing each other, playing off of each other.

Take Away: I was not expecting the holiday rush to be quite so hectic this year.  With the pandemic and all of the struggles associated with it (economic, etc), I figured it would be slow.  I made a few adjustments in how I was advertising due to that and, as a result, have been remarkably blessed with a massively busy holiday rush as a result.   I really need the money and I’m very grateful for every single sale… but it means I am pushing myself extremely hard at the moment. Part of that process is ignoring my own weaknesses and circumventing others, and treating myself with a great lack of understanding, as well as closing off and not being quite as tolerant of irritations as a result.

In order for me to foster understanding for both myself and others, I need to make sure that I’m practicing gratitude in my thoughts and inner dialogue.  Instead of allowing myself to deal on how my hands and forearm hurt, how I’m not getting enough sleep, how the stress and rush has my anxiety riding high in my chest (and causing acid reflux whenever I lie down), etc… I need to make sure I’m focusing on the positive aspects and the good that all of this is going to do for me and allow these things to be uplifting.

DECK USED:  KEYMASTER TAROT