The Forgotten – Story Time

Pull at least three cards and use them to… tell us a story about a pair of shoes.

Lighteater's Tarot

There’s smooth wood under the his soles as he sits on the porch. Once upon a time he was young and spry and new (Ace of Cups). But heat and cold and time has taken their tole upon him now and where once his soles were flat and strong, now they are brittle and curled slightly up at the toes. (Ten of Swords)

That’s because the leather is dry now. And as it dried, it made his toes curl up a bit, as giving him a different view over time. When first set here, he could see out over the wooden planks and watch the children play in the yard, the come and go of the mailman each day, and the passing of cars on the old dirt road.

But as toes curled, his view changed. Winter came and he watched the snow fall as temperatures plummeted, and then the world became warm again. Where once he could see the grass, by the time summer came again, he could no longer (Four of Swords). He couldn’t watch the boy that mows the lawn and dream about those grass stains anymore, instead his view began at the road and the trees on the other side, and just a peek of the sky (Four of Cups).

And he waited. Loyal and patient. He waited for someone to remember about the old pair of sneakers once new, and now long hidden under the rocker on the porch.

But winter came again and the cold gripped the world. The leather tightened further, dried out by the chill in the air (Nine of Swords), and his view again changed.

Now he can see the sky and the trees, but by the time summer comes again, the road is now gone. He sees planes that fly overhead, and watches the fall of rain as it splats and patters on the ground he can no longer see. Long nights filled with crickets songs and days filled with the squeak and slam of the screen door as the children come and go.

One day a windstorm came (imagery from the Three of Staves) and tossed branches from the trees nearby onto the porch, and during the cleanup that follows he is finally found. Alas! He is discovered! Picked up and brought inside, he is cleaned and moisturized, and his leather sighs in relief as oils are rubbed in (Princess of Cups) and he’s set upon the table to dry (Temperance).

For a full day, he watches the light come through windows and the comings and goings of the big, happy family (Ten of Cups). He is picked up by many, and tried on by some, and as night falls he thinks of his porch and the crickets and misses the moon (The Moon).

The next day, he is taken up and brought back outside, but he is not put on the porch. Instead, he is taken beyond the yard and along the road past the trees he’s known for so long (The Chariot). In town, he is handed to another and by the end of the day he is among other shoes (Seven of Cups), sitting on a box in a display window in town.

Then a day came while sitting in the window that a woman (Queen of Coins) and her small son stop to look inside and the little boy points to him through the glass (imagery on the Six of Cups).

They come inside, and in short order he is fitted on the little boy’s feet (Two of Cups). The boy wiggles his toes, tickling the shoes and causing a spark of glee, and the boy giggles happily in response to the energy created (Ace of Cups with Four of Staves).

The boy does not take off the shoes, but walks around the small shop with them on his feet as his mother deals with haggling and payment, and then… he tastes the joy of service after years of misuse (Six of Swords) as the little boy wears him out of the store and a new adventure begins. (Eight of Staves)

DECK USED: LIGHTEATER’S TAROT

 

Double, Double Toil and Trouble

Today’s meditation was ten minutes long, and was a guided meditation that focused on how it’s okay to be kind to yourself about missing meditation practice now and then… and how it is important to not look at your meditation practice as some kind of chore or task.

When it is looked at as a chore or task, then it becomes something you “have” to do, and something you can then more easily resent or get burned out on.  If we instead seek to see meditation as a moment of kindness to ourselves and a “break” from the world at large, then meditation becomes a reprieve and a retreat… something that we feel eager to experience each day.

I needed this advice, and I like the idea of looking at my meditation practice as a retreat and a reprieve from the everyday.

Efflorescent Tarot (Color Edition)Today’s draw is a double without a jumper, which means that both cards jumped out of the deck together as one.  The cards in today’s draw are the Nine of Swords and the Three of Swords.   Both of these cards themes deal with agonizing over different aspects, and it is that theme that I feel is the message in today’s draw.

The appearance of these cards in today’s draw is a message about being too much in my head and allowing that to take over.  The whole water issue in my building has really got me stressed out and I’m trying to stay calm about it, but especially after the collapse yesterday and the kid getting caught under the debris…. I’m just not dealing well.

Hell, I dreamed about her dying last night and me pulling her dead body out of the debris instead of a live and bawling little girl, traumatized and with broken arm, but otherwise okay.

I’m so lucky that the water didn’t really spread that far into my unit, just a bit in the kitchen, but it seems that the worry over what’s going on next door is really getting to me and I need to relax and let it go.  Everyone is okay… and it’s going to be okay.

DECK USED: THE EFFLORESCENT TAROT (COLOR EDITION)

#TarotForGrowthJanuary Challenge Prompt
Question
: How can I manage or release those expectations and leave room for growth?

Fey TarotReading Summary:  Connect with and rely on others (Two of Cups) rather than trying to “fight this battle alone” (Seven of Wands).

Take Away:  The expectation from yesterday is that working with that new depth of emotion discovered last fall should be easy for me.  It’s not an expectation of the work, but rather an expectation of myself that I should be capable enough to deal with it without issue or problem.   It’s unrealistic, and I know that.

The cards in this read indicate that in order to release those expectations and leave room for growth, I need to accept it is not something I’m going to be able to do on my own, and I need not just be willing to ask for help… but actually do the asking instead of pushing myself to say “I’ve got this” and trying to struggle through it alone.

DECK USED:  FEY TAROT

#DiscordTarotholicsJan2020 Challenge Prompt
Question
: Do Spread #4

Golden Art Nouveau Tarot

Reading Summary:  OOPS CRAP… I did Spread #5  So I will interpret this one for today, and then do Spread #4 next week in place of the one I’m doing today.

Card 1 – Too much focus on my business and the focus upon my goals concerning stability and financial independence.

Card 2 – I need to take more time in meditation and personal reflection, so that I can connect deeper and move beyond surface and/or superficial focal points. The tarot has more to offer me than it can provide when limited to those topics.

Card 3 – I try to hard to empower my client during their reading, and that can sometimes cause the message to become diluted and thus do the opposite of what was intended.

Take Away:   When reading for myself… look deeper. Use my meditation as a tool to find those deeper threads and follow them into deeper waters of my life and psyche.  The cards are essentially saying that I’ve fallen into a bit of a rut.

When reading for others, remember that sometimes the message being conveyed needs to be blunt and/or sharp in order to really drill down into the mind of the client.  Sometimes providing explanation does not assist in empowerment, but is a detriment to it.

DECK USED:  GOLDEN ART NOUVEAU TAROT

#ConnectWithYourDeckChallenge Prompt
Question
: What do I need for a successful year?

Lighteater's Tarot

Reading Summary: Impassioned focus upon my goals (Princess of Staves) will overcome adversity (Five of Swords) and allow me to find a more stable center for pursuit of my ambitions (King of Staves), even in times of struggle (Five of Coins).

Take Away:  The things that I want to accomplish this year are going to require going through a good deal of strife and struggle along the way.  In order to succeed and move through these issues, I need to hold tight to my exploratory spark in relation to my passions and work at keeping that spark not just lit and alive, but also stable and controlled.

DECK USED:  LIGHTEATER’S TAROT

Hermit Crabs and Tortoise Shells

Today’s meditation was… non-existent.  I’m running on about two and a half hours of sleep at the moment, and any lying down or inactively sitting still I do is going to result in me falling asleep.  Because of that, there was no way that I could do my meditation this morning, and I couldn’t do it in the car because the weather and roads were so bad today that even when I wasn’t driving, J needed the help in keeping an eye out for issues.

I will try to meditate when I lie down for bed tonight, though.  If I fall asleep then, at least it’ll be safe and that sleep won’t be cutting into anything important.

Efflorescent Tarot (Color Edition)Today’s draw is a double without a jumper, meaning that both cards came out together from the deck.  The cards in today’s draw are the Hermit card and the Eight of Cups.

This is 100% about how I feel today.  It’s about the drop, and it’s about our issues last night, and it’s about how I feel on the inside.

I don’t want anything to do with what happened yesterday.   And after last night?  I don’t want anything to do with the drop either.  Not that the drop is ever pleasant to begin with, but… yeah.

Today’s cards have appeared to force me to confront that want to hide away and retreat, and a reminder that what we have is worth fighting for and holding onto, even when all I really want to do is retreat into my shell and hunker down in there out of sight.

DECK USED: THE EFFLORESCENT TAROT (COLOR EDITION)

#TarotForGrowthJanuary Challenge Prompt
Question
: How can I make space for that joy this year? (From yesterday’s cards.)

Arcana Tarot by Hydra-Nix

Reading Summary:  I need to better balance my needs (Justice card) with my constant quest to know more (Page of Swords) and doing better in those things that foster my sense of security (Page of Pentacles).

Take Away:  I always prioritize the whole “learning more and doing better” thing when it comes to how I manage my time, and that includes time spent in my relationship with you.  I work hard to obtain and hold onto security and stability in my life both financially and in my home, and that is where a huge amount of my focus lies.

Expressing dominance in our relationship (which is the joy that yesterday’s reading was about) takes a significant amount of energy and effort, even when that need rises to a point it can’t be ignored.  That energy and effort over the past year has been channeled into my work and fostering that stability instead of being expressed through our relationship.

Today’s cards indicate that I need to find a better balance between those material demands (and the knowledge gathering they require) and the facet of our relationship that allows me to express those more dominant urges.

DECK USED:  THE ARCANA TAROT BY HYDRA-NIX

#DiscordTarotholicsJan2020 Challenge Prompt
Question
: What concession can you make to provide for yesterday’s inner child craving?

Forest Creatures Tarot

Reading Summary:  I need to look into and explore (Page of Swords) a better way of getting to those natural places I crave (The Chariot) rather than dispairing that I can’t reach them (Nine of Swords).   If I make some changes (Death), I’ll find myself much happier with what I have afterward (Nine of Cups).

Take Away:  Yesterday’s read was about getting out in nature more, even when it’s frigidly cold, as it is right now.   The cards in today’s reading are about finding better ways to access nature so that I can spend the time I need there to feel good and right with the world.  I need to explore alternative ways to get where I want (and need) to be.  Maybe I should look into something like a snowmobile rental or some sort of ATV use for this time of year so that I can get out to those remote spots more easily when the temperatures are so low that hiking isn’t an option.

DECK USED:  FOREST CREATURES TAROT

#ConnectWithYourDeckChallenge Prompt
Question
: What could help my daily organization?

Lighteater's Tarot

Reading Summary:  I need to be kinder to myself (Amicka) and stop presenting the image that I have it all together (Six of Staves) when in truth I’m a bit lost in the weeds (The Moon).

Take Away:  Okay so firstly?   This deck needs to be moved over into my shadow work decks.  Because… Jesus.  Just sayin’.  But this is the second time the imagery has jerked me into some pretty intense reactions…. and the second time I have used the deck.  (I just bought it earlier this month.)  I’m going to continue to use it through the end of the month as a regular deck, but I have a feeling it’s just too hard-hitting for “everyday” use.

So, that out of the way… I am very skilled at being extremely hard on myself.  I’ve had a lifetime of practice with a spectacular teacher who was very skilled at making you feel that you aren’t good enough.   This tendency means that I often present a “everything is perfectly fine” front even when it’s not.  If I want to find a better way of organizing my daily life?  I’m going to have to let go of both that tendency to tear myself apart and the tendency to pretend everything is okay, because I need to be able to let others in to help me when i start to feel lost and overwhelmed.

DECK USED:  LIGHTEATER’S TAROT

Forethought and Choices

Today’s meditation was just over twelve minutes long, and was focused (again) on the new year.  It spoke of new years resolutions, and how they don’t work.   Not because we don’t want them to or don’t have every intention of following through with them, but because change is often something that needs to be integrated into our lives one small step at a time so that we have time to adjust and adapt.

When we try to instill change in a sudden sort of way, what  often happens is that you have difficulty following on through the larger changes once the newness has fallen away.   When you stretch out the process and take little steps?  There’s a better chance of it sticking as it means that the new habits have time to integrate and overwrite the old.

My personal opinion is that sometimes it works… and sometimes?  It doesn’t, yeah?  Some habits need more than willpower to break.  Sometimes it’s not about habits, but about a mindset.  And sometimes?  What we’re trying to break the habit of doing isn’t a habit at all, but a part of our very nature.  All of that’s okay.  It doesn’t mean we give up, only that  we try again and search for new and different methods that might work better the next time.

Knight of Swords - Spacious TarotToday’s draw is the Explorer of Swords, which is the equivalent of the Knight of Swords in this deck. Traditionally this card represents a proactive beta energy, personality, or person in the realm of logic, thoughts, intellect, and communication.   This often comes through as relating to the themes of quick minded ambition and, occasionally, impulsiveness.

The thing is, though, when I see today’s card, what I see is less impulsiveness and more of a “look before  you leap.   The crow sits upon the blade of the sword, but thinks twice about moving out onto the blade where it overhangs open space, as if considering if it is a wise decision (which, of course, it is not… that crow is far too heavy to perch out there).

Yes, the crow will survive either way.  It can fly.   But the choice the crow makes now is the the one that matters.  If it steps out on the blade?  It will force an action that otherwise the crow would never have made.  A choice forced upon it by the previous choice already made.

As a result, this message is more about thinking before you act.  And about making sure that the steps taken are taking me in the right direction, the direction that I want to go in, rather than allowing my choices to force me into decisions and directions I wasn’t planning on going in.

DECK USED:  SPACIOUS TAROT

#TarotForGrowthJanuary Challenge Prompt
Question
: What energy did I bring along into 2020?

Field Tarot

Reading Summary:  I’m feeling a bit of disappointment over the past year (Five of Cups) and want to move forward with changes to how I juggle (Two of Disks) my business and ambitions over the next year (Ace of Wands).

Take Away:  I’ve mentioned this in previous readings, so it’s not a huge surprise that it would come up today with this question.  I feel like my plate has been too full with work related mess over the past year, and I need to put some priority on the more administrative side of things in order to help my business grow.

I always set the administrative side of things to the back burner and then things end up a bit of a mess. Moving into the new year I’m carrying with me that desire to try balancing things in a different way, the disappointment of the year behind me there to push me onward into that goal.

DECK USED:  THE FIELD TAROT

#DiscordTarotholicsJan2020 Challenge Prompt
Gideon… This is not just a reading prompt, but also an invitation for you to join me in one of the tarot discord servers I am a member of.  It is my congratulations gift to you for having completed the first stage of your lessons in the tarot, and I have been looking forward to giving it to you for some time.  I hope you will decide to join me.
Question:  Do Spread #1

Maregician Tarot Sleeplessness EditionReading Summary:   This is a spread about the wicked witch of the deep south.  I did not choose the target of the spread, but rather allowed the spread to choose for me.  The King of Clubs indicates that the negative influence she had over my life was to yank me forward into that habit of mine of being over-analytical while stuffing my feelings in a box to the side.  The Moon indicates that in return, my negative aspect on her was to create within her a sense of uncertainty.  The Star indicates that the positive influence that they had upon my life was in planting the seeds of inspiration to get more deeply in touch with my spirituality.  The Two of Hearts indicates that my positive influence on her life is that she developed a closer, deeper bond her crones as a result of our encounter and that possibly one in particular in her group stepped forward in a big way in this capacity at that time.

Take Away:  What I get from this spread is that my encounter with the wicked witch of the deep south created not just bad things… but also benefits.  This is something that’s not always easy for me to see, but I do understand how it works, as even negative experiences have positive aspects in how they play out.

DECK USED:  MAREGICIAN TAROT

#ConnectWithYourDeckChallenge Prompt
Question
:  My biggest challenge this year.

Lighteater’s Tarot

Reading Summary:  Mmm well, this is a new deck, and I’m apparently going to have to work past the whole face of the guy in the Knight of Staves because he looks JUST like this super slob gross person that used to live next door.  Just sayin’.  Onward to the reading…

Working with others can always be quite challenging for me (Three of Coins), but if I want to advance in my ambitions concerning my business (Knight of Staves) I am going to have to find a way to be the boss and direct a helper while keeping my own issues about working with others stable and centered, and my eye on the ball (King of Staves).

Take Away:  Now that I’ve moved on from my last helper and her undependable ways, it’s going to be necessary to reassess my own reactions to working with others and search for someone that is a better fit for the way I work.   Preferably someone far more dependable than the last.   This won’t be an easy process, but if I’m proactive in the approach, I’ll be able to find what I need.

DECK USED:  LIGHTEATER’S TAROT