Emotions

Gideon’s Challenge

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“Your life will be filled with struggle, strife, and woe.
There will be great love, and great pain.
There will be comfort, but not prosperity.
These troubles are lessons carried over from the life you left behind, and lessons needed for the life to come.”

Future Path

Pensive

At nine years old, a trusted friend with a remarkable gift did a tarot reading for me to get a picture of my future. That was the result, although it was not given to me until much later when asked for. There was more, of course, but that was the “theme” of my life that surfaced within the cards.

Ten years later, the same friend did the reading again. The cards were different, as were the words… but the theme was the same.

Over the years between that first reading and now, I’ve had my tarot read many times for many different reasons and with many goals in mind. I’ve done it for myself, and I’ve had others do it for me.

And whenever the question is about the “theme” of my life, the results are the same.

Next year, it will have been another ten years, and I will go back to that same friend again to have my tarot read regarding the theme of my life, just as I have in the last two decades prior.

I wonder, as I do with each reading, if the theme will change… or continue on as it has been.

Gideon’s Challenge

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Broken

Broken Slat

Not my spirit, but my body.  Sometimes, it drags on me.  That constant pain is like paint chipping away on a broken slat.  The break is there and can’t be fixed, and still year after year the paint keeps on wearing down and chipping away.

Sometimes, that’s how my pain feels.   My back.  My knee. My hip.  My ankle. Shoulder. Elbow. Wrist.  And that’s not even counting the pain from the scar tissue…. internal and external.

I suffer in silence.  There is nothing anyone can do for it, there is no solution or resolution, no cure or magical healing that will take it away.  Expressing one’s pain to others nothing but make them uncomfortable, so there is no point, yes?

I work hard to manage it with my physical activity, yoga and other stretching, meditation, physio, chiropractor, ice packs, massage, and when absolutely necessary, anti-inflammatories and pain relievers.  And yet, it’s always there.

I try to ignore it, and for small fractions of time here and there, I succeed.  And yet it’s still there.  Always there.

Today, is one of those days where it refuses to be ignored.  Instead of being able to ignore it for an hour here or there, it is ever present and nagging.  I’m so tired of the pain.  I can’t even remember or imagine what life is like without it.

Gideon’s Challenge

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Pride

Water Park

My heart warmed with pride today, because last year this little boy was terrified of the water and would barely get close enough to stick his toes into the wading pool.

Although my neighbor and her son moved away a while ago, I’ve stayed in touch and enjoy visiting and being considered a “part of the family”. Over the past year, I’ve had a lot of talks with him about the water.  About lakes and oceans, beaches and swimming pools.  In June, I convinced him to take a swim class, which he agreed to as long as I came with him.

And look at him.   A day at the water park and he had a blast.  It wasn’t a big water park, and it wasn’t a big slide.  But he did it on his own and was smiling  both as he landed in the water, and as he waded out of the pool.

I consider that a success.

Gideon’s Challenge

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Cuddly Goodness

IMG_3808

My little girl likes to snuggle.  Any time I lie down, she comes running to come curl up with me.  She might not stay long, but for at least a handful of minutes, she’ll cuddle up into me and knead while she purrs.  Usually, she seems to stay until I fall asleep, then wanders off.  Sometimes, she stays for hours.

It’s so nice.   I loved Meanie a lot, but she was never a cuddly cat.  She would lie ON me, but didn’t savor petting or want you to touch her in any way.   Luna, on the other hand, likes it if I pet her and often enjoys when I curl my arm around her when she cuddles in.

It soothes my heart and sometimes, when I ache, I take a few minutes to lie down just so that I can have those moments with her.

Gideon’s Challenge

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Puzzled

Have you ever seen a light bulb go dim instead of burn out?

It’s the strangest thing.   I use a 150 watt full spectrum light bulb in the lamp in my living room.  Over the past few weeks, I’ve noticed that my living room seems more dim than usual.   Then today, coming out of the kitchen, it was really dark in there.

Yet, the light bulb was still burning.

I went and got a new one anyway, because I figured it couldn’t possibly be my eyes playing tricks on me when it’s such a marked amount of darkness.  And I was right.   I changed the bulb and it’s now bright in the room again.

The puzzling part is that the bulb never actually burnt out.  I’ve never heard of (or experienced) this happening before.  I wouldn’t even have thought it could… and yet, there you have it.

Gideon’s Challenge

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Amusement

Jackass TowingBecause I saw this logo on the side of a tow truck today.

The license plate was Canadian, which means they probably towed someone down from over the border.  I can’t even imagine how much a towing fee might cost from British Columbia to Seattle, WA… but it has to be pretty hefty.

In truth, this is the second amusing towing company I’ve run across from up north.  They also having a towing company up there named “Aggressive Towing” that has a fleet of very pretty, always shiny aqua green trucks.

Clearly, Canadian tow truck companies have a good sense of humor.